I feel strange, can you help me
I'm a little lost today
You're the only face i think of
When i cannot find my way
I could tell you what goes crossing
Always crossing through my mind
I don't need to tell you nothing,
I know that you're on my side
 

Can you help me

Feel a little less strange?

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''Oppa~ you know...it's my first time sleeping out, so If I couldn't sleep or had any problem, I will call you already, okay?''

I have explained to Oppa Sohyun's parents' absence; he actually knew,long before, about their hate to me. Therefore, he approved my sleepover in her house.

I had many fears as I was doing this for the first time ever. Therefore, I was hesitant and whined a lot like a little spoiled child.

''You should have great fun as you are having your school final exams soon.'' Oppa stated nonchalantly while he was preparing me some pancakes to eat for breakfast.

That was not what I expected nor what I wanted. I hoped that he would persuade me to stay home or be worried about me. But he gave me away so easily.

Later, in Sohyun's house, I admitted as we were sitting on the floor and having a heart-to-heart talk,''I am feeling really confused and lost these days; I am being more sensitive and behaving like children. What shall I do?''

''What do you mean, Ji? I am not seeing that on you.'' She replied.

''Really? I think that I am the only one feeling it then. My heartbeat gets so fast, my body's heat increases, and I get butterflies in my stomach when I am beside him or... -''

''It's normal, Ji, don't worry. This happens always when you love someone, and ,unfortunately, you are in love with that old-fashioned teacher.'' She cut my words filling my mouth with three thick chips of cookies.

''But it's not my teacher...this happens when I am with oppa.'' I muttered to myself while she was walking out of the room to bring more snacks.

Then all of sudden, I heard a familiar short and quiet tone coming from my small bag, which I put in a corner. I approached towards it and picked up the source of the sound, the weird man's mobile.

I breathed in and, hesitantly, pressed a button to expose the message I recieved.

It said,''Hyung~ why don't you answer me? I've apologized and explained my reasons. You have to understand my excuses and let me do what I want. But please, don't neglect me when I need you the most.''

''What is that?'' I startled and turned up to her as she was sneaking a peek above my shoulder.

In fact, I've brought the mobile along with me because I didn't want oppa to see it. I've been taking it with me everywhere I go since I found the messages. And in my way to Sohyun's house I was thinking about telling her about my secret, but I was hesitant.

Now she caught me, so that settled the whole matter for me. I had to tell her.

''This is the complete story. What do you think now?'' We were sitting observing each other, and I've told her about the mobile and the weird messages. 

She looked somehow displeased, so I rushed defending myself and giving excuse,''I swear I was uncomfortable and confused because of it, and I didn't know what to do. Even oppa don't know about it.''

Another short tone has hushed us up, so I hastily looked at the mobile and found a new message. I took a deep breath and read it loudly to let Sohyun know its content,''If you don't answer me, I will go search for you. I have some places in mind, so if I tried I may find you. I can't be fine while hyung is angry with me.''

She opened her eyes wide saying worriedly,''Oh my god, he is coming. What shall we do?''

Although I was a little bit uneasy, I laughed heartily at her comment, so she showed me her surprised face.

I hushed my laugh and explained to her,''How would he come here? He don't even know that we have this mobile, and he is sending messages as if the one who read them is his hyung; maybe he is the one who died in the weird explosion before weeks.'' 

She laughed after she got it. Then she told me that she isn't stupid but taken by that odd story.

''Then what shall we do now?'' She seemed satisfied as I emphasised ''we''. I meant to do it as I really wanted to share my elusory secret with someone, so if it was not oppa then it's her, of course.

''Why don't you message him back?'' She suddenly suggested, and I startled.

''Didn't you think about it? If you try, you may find out new things, who knows!''

She was right actually, but I was afraid of this step. Tricking and personating others aren't easy to do, so I needed to think deeply before I take my decision.

That man gave me this mobile intentionally, and he didn't put conditions. He even told me that I might find out who I am by using it; I doubted that, though.

''Alright, what shall I send?'' I finally agreed worriedly.

''I am not angry, so shut the hell down.'' She paused then continued with a grin,''By that, you will make up between them; this is a good thing, so you don't have to be worried.''

Yeah! That clever friend could persuade me very well. Therefore, I typed her words exactly as she mentioned them.

''Now we have to wait.'' She uttered enthusiastically and I gave her a slight smile.
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We waited so long but got no answer, so we got really worried, and I stated,''He maybe went to sleep, or did he go to search for his hyung as he said he would?''
 
''Maybe he didn't see the message yet. Let's not get worried; we have nothing to lose, you know!'' She assured me, and I could understand and believe what she said.

''Yeah! You are totally right. If he believed that the sender is his hyung, he would feel good that he is not angry with him anymore. On the other hand, if he didn't believe and went to search for his hyung, who is probably the one who was killed weeks ago, then he won't find him. Anyway, when we feel the risk, we can get rid of this mobile and nothing would happen to us.'' 

''Yepp~ let's have fun now. Follow me.'' She stood up and walked out of the room, and I followed whining,''Where are we going? Let's stay in your room or SoMin onnie will get upset with us.''

She ignored my complaint and grasped my wrist pulling me along after her.

She the T.V and sat on the sofa in front of it, and she looked at me grinning. I sighed and sat beside her; then her smile grew wider.

''I hate the T.V, don't you know that?''
Yeah! I really hate it because oppa does. He sees that it only brings upsetting news. If you even watch entertaining shows, it will bring you misery after it finishes. Then there is nothing called educational programs because if you want to learn, then grab a book and learn. That what he believe in, so I was affected by his perspective and I started to hate the T.V.

''So what do you do when you are free or bored?'' She asked nonchalantly while she was turning over the channels to find something good to watch.

''Spend my time with oppa. We play many games, go out to eat someting or just go walking and breathe some fresh air.'' I answered with a wide cheerful smile.

All of sudden, she jumped closer to me and stuck her face close to mine asking curiously,''Tell me, how do you feel having a handsome oppa living with you and raising you up. I find it interesting; what do you think?''

I narrowed my eyes and wondered,''What kind of question is this? Don't you dare falling in love with MY handsome oppa.''

''Why are you being aggressive now? I am just asking. Don't tell me that you're in love with him, too. At this rate, I predict that you will get married to a fifty-year old man.'' She giggled at her own teasing words and I pouted.

I took a minute to think well and to give her a convincing reply; then I said quietly in a dreamy tone,''Oppa is my everything, so nobody can ever take him from me. I am also so precious for him, and he will never give me away; these are his own words.''

She nodded, hummed and said,''Nothing stays forever, so don't cling to him that much so that you won't get hurt in the end.''

She threw those words indifferently, but they actually stuck in my mind for a long time. Although I hated them, deep inside me I very much believed in them.

''What if I fall in love with him as a man? Would it hurt me, too?'' I wondered, and she was shocked. Therefore, I assured her,''I am saying ''what if'' only, don't misunderstand me; this is impossible to happen.''

She released a sigh thinking deeply, and then said,''It would be really awkward, especially if you confessed to him, and things may change between you two. Hopefully this won't happen as you're in love head over heels with Kim seungsaeng-nim''

We both hushed after I gave her my warm eyesmile. She forced me to watch a romantic film; I whined a lot but she didn't care.

After few minutes, we were entirely taken by that film. It had a tragic end, so we went on crying like little girls.

Therefore, I beated her up for making me watch that movie and become emotional, which I really hate.

She giggled and tried to escape away. But I caught her and tickled her to death. Her sister appeared behind us with an angry face putting her hand on her waist and looking so annoyed.

We stopped and apologized directly, so she walked towards the kitchen offering with a not-so-kind-but-earnest tone,''I am boiling water to prepare ramyn, would you like some, naughty girls?''

We nodded happily and smiled. Oppa doesn't allow me to eat ramyn much, but I like it, so that was a great chance.

''Looks like she is sick; onnie doesn't usually offer this. She is studious; didn't I tell you?'' She quietly whispered grinning as we were going back to sit on the sofa.

I nodded and jokingly talked big,''My presence is always a good luck for you; you have to admit it.'' 

She acted as if she is vomitting, so I playfully tickled her again and she burst in laugh.

''Girls~ shall I go back on my word? Be quiet; you are causing me a headache'' SoMin onnie yelled from inside the kitchen, and we immediatly obeyed.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Actually, SoMin- Sohyun's sister- turned to be so much better than what I thought she would be. Yes, she is firm and humorless, but still she was somehow kind in talking with me.

I knew that she studies Literature in university, and she told me that her favorite writer is a Korean novelist living abroad called ''Kang Ha In''. I commented nicely,''She got a beautiful name, I bit she is beautiful, too.''

She sipped the rest of the liquid in her ramyn cup and stated nonchalantly,''I may send you a picture of her and I later when I meet her, and hopefully I will.''

I nodded smiling and looked at Sohyun who was really busy with her food.

''What about you? What do you want to study in the future, or what you like to do?'' SoMin suddenly asked me gazing directly into my eyes with a thin but lovely smile.

It was actually my first time being asked this question, but I always had the same and only answer in my mind's eyes.

''I want to manage an orphanage or to be a nanny to look after young children.'' I directly stated and her smile widened brightly.

''You seem to be a little brat, but you are actually really good. It was so nice to meet you, Eunji-ssi.'' She took her empty cup and walked towards the kitchen then to her room closing the door behind her.

''She is not that bad, after all; I somehow liked her.'' I stated looking at Sohyun who was still busy in eating the ramyn.

She nodded and then looked at me saying with narrow eyes,''You never told me about your future plans. We are best friends, so you must share these things with me so that we think together.''

I meant to annoy her as a punishment for not joining me in the awkward conversation with SoMin onnie, so I said,''I don't have to because I am not planning to stay with you in the future. I will get bored, so I may need new friends.''

''HEY YOU! Don't dare changing me.'' She seemed really irritated, and  I concealed my giggle. Getting her goat became my job, recently, and I liked that.

It was 12:30 A.M, and we were lying down in our sleeping bags on the floor.

She stated lovingly,''I had a great pajama party because of you, my sweet Ji; thanks a lot.''

''What is the pajama party?'' I put the same goofy face I used before when she mentioned this term days before.

She was about to yell at me, but she stood up instead and brought a pillow shouting cheerfully,''Pillow fight!''

I couldn't understand it till she hit me repeatedly, so then I held the other pillow and paid her hits back.

It was not a fight but a WAR. We had extreme fun and almost died laughing.

''WHAT THE HECK IS GOING ON?'' A strange feminine voice almost cracked the walls and deafened our ears.

We both startled and looked at the source of the sound fearfully. 

''Omma!'' Sohyun uttered in a terrified tone. Just as I thought...she was her mother.

She had a long black hair like Sohyun's and the same eyes, too, but hers were so tough.

I felt really awkward and I was about to cry. I finally met the one who hates me very much, but ,unfortunately, it wasn't a convenient meet at all.

Sohyun tried to explain the matter for her mother and persuade her to let me sleep there just that night, but she only answered by shouting and yelling.

I felt really humiliated even though Sohyun tried hard to not let me feel so as she was hushing her mother every time she cursed me.

I dialed oppa's number and waited for seconds before he answered,"What's up, Ji? Is there something wrong, sweetie?" His voice was not sleepy as I thought it would be.

"Oppa~ Can you please come to take me home. I will explain things for you later." I stated with a quiet tone trying my best not to cry.

Sohyun heard me speaking with oppa when she entered the room with a gloomy face. She even cried while saying with an apologetic tone,"I am terribly sorry, Eunji. I am sorry that you have been insulted because of me; please forgive...-"

I cut her words with a tight hug as she started sobbing and made my eyes tearful.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"Oppa~ Do you think that I am a good person?" I hesitantly asked him without eye contact. We were walking home as I wanted because I felt annoyed and wanted to breathe some fresh air.

He smiled kindly and said,"You are good enough to make me fond of you."

I drew a lovely grin on my lips before stating cheerfully,"That's enough then!" 

We sat on a bench in the central park as we were passing by it. He gripped my hand softly and whined,"I have a severe headache; what shall I do?"

I looked at him and could see the pain inside his eyes.
Therefore, I pulled his head to my hug tenderly, and I could feel the warmth that I really wanted. 

"Aigoo~ my little boy is sick again. I have to take better care of you...-"

"I miss you very much my lovely mother." I could feel the sadness on his tone.

That touched my heart and made me shed tears. Everytime I see his sadness I feel disappointed. I even wanted to take off my own happiness- if there was any- and give it to him.

When we came back home, I checked out the message I got from Sohyun; she apologized again and told me the reason of her parents sudden return. She said that they waited so long for the flight but it was canceled due to the unsettled weather.

I took a look at the weird man's mobile before I sleep and I surprisingly found a new message.

Then I typed to Sohyun telling her about it.

Me:Soo~ I got a message from the unknown dongsaeng.
Sohyun:Quickly tell me...what does it say?
Me:"Thanks hyung, and please never ask me to leave her again." That's it. What shall I do?
Sohyun:Oh~ That's weird. Just ignore it.
Me:Alright; we'll talk later. Good night, SoHoney!
Sohyun:Good night, Ji. 

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Here is my fifth chapter. I put more Eunji-Sohyun moments because I like them, haha^^ but that's not the only reason. This actually is a part of the plot, so please stay tuned to learn more about the secret and the weird things happening up here.

Enjoy reading^^

THANKS~