"Woah." I clumsily stumble backward as I try to walk him to the couch.  But before I can do anything, Kai roughly pushed himself off me and limps his way over to the pantry, yanking open a few drawers roughly. 

What in the world...

Ah! First aid box!

"Kai, sit down, I'll get it for you." I say, telling him to go over to the couch.

"I can do this myself." He argues in an annoyed voice.  He might as well add ' off'.

I sigh and poke his shoulder twice (which proves to be a lot harder than I expected it to be), trying to get him to look at me.  "Rest." 

"I don't need to." 

"Yes you do.  You're obviously hurt."  I argue with my hands on my hips.

"This is nothing." He scoffs, almost sneering at me.

"Kai, sit down.  I'll do it for you.  Think of it as a nice gesture."  I say stubbornly, pulling the first aid box out of his hands. 

"I don't need nice."

Okay, can I just... what the is wrong with this man?!  Why is he so shut off?!

What a ing... Cyborg!

Urgh.  I'll just assume it's because he's pissed he got hurt. 

"Everybody needs nice."  I reply before walking away to the couch with the first aid kit successfully in my hands.  With nothing else he can do, Kai unwillingly complies and sits on the couch as I kneel on the floor before him.

The moment he sits on the couch in front of the coffee table, his eyes pop open as wide as saucers.  "What the hell is that?!!" He says through gritted teeth, looking murderously at the clear fish bowl with a single lone goldfish inside on top of the table.

I smile sheepishly at him.  "That's Hawaii." 

"WHAT?!"  Kai looks like he's going to blow up.

"He's a goldfish."

"I know that much!  Why the is it here?!  Christ, Iseul, I told you to babysit my son, not redecorate my hou--"

"But Jongguk asked for it!"  I interrupt.  "We went to Target today--"

"You... What?!"

"Target!   The big--"

"Why did you go there?!"  Kai shouts again. 

I try not to falter under his angry glare.  The kind of gaze that makes you want to shrivel up and reflect on how pathetic you are.

"He asked for... French food.  Or was it Italian? "  I mumble.   "Anyway.  The one you usually take him to, he said.  I had no idea where it was and how much it'll cost so I told him that we could make some ourself at home.  I'm not sure if I had enough cash with me for escargot." 

"And the goldfish..?" Kai looks at it with disgust.

"He saw it on one of the aisles." I say as I open the box, ready to begin with my operation!  "Home décor."

"Iseul.  Stop.  I can do this myself."  He glares at me as I start taking out the contents of the box.  "Just give me that-"

"I can do this myself TOO.  Now show me your wound."  I snap, taking out a bottle of disinfectant, iodine solution and some cotton and tape.

"Can you?" Kai questions as he rolls up his pants, revealing a wound the size of a pancake on his knee.

"Of course!  I was on the first aid team of my school since junior high!" I say indignantly.  But throughout all my days I've never encountered such a...

Brutal wound.  What the hell happened there?

"I told you I don't need your help."

"Stop.  I want to help.  Now just be quiet and be grateful."

"Aish."  Kai grumbles as I start tending his wound.  "You're babysitting my son, not me."

I try to ignore it.  "You know, you really should go see a doctor."

"Because of a scar?" He asks.

"This isn't a scar Kai.  It's a HOLE." I nearly shout.  A scar?!!  A SCAR?!!  Does he even speak Korean?!! 

"I don't need doctors."  He shrugs, closing his eyes and leaning his head backwards on the couch. 

He really is independent, isn't he?   I don't need this.  I don't need nice.  I don't need doctors... some tough guy he is. 

Of all the times I expected Kai to hiss or squirm in pain, he never does.  I almost thought he is dead, if it isn't for his Adam's apple bobbing up and down as he occasionally swallows.  So this cyborg does still have pain-sensitive sensors.

"There." I say quietly, once I finish with the wound on his knee.  I look up at him.  "Oh, hey, your lip is bleeding."

"No thank you." He quickly rejects before I can offer to clean it up for him.

But my persistent self won't let it go without helping him first.  "Just... hold still for a moment."  I whisper as I sit on the couch and lean closer to him. 

"Iseul." He enunciates scathingly, opening one eye.  "Get away from me."

If I'm a normal person I would've already recoiled like I just got touched by fire, but apparently I'm not, because I only pout a little.  "That's mean.  Hold on, I'll just dab this ointment right here and leave." 

And before he can argue, I dab a cotton swab that I've coated with a little gel-like ointment on the edge of his lips. 

Oh God.  I shouldn't be saying this but... his lips are so... Pouty!! 

They're almost... um...

"Quit staring."  Kai murmurs with his lips barely moving as he opens one eye to look at me.  I feel my face heat up and I quickly retract my hand.

"There.  Sorry." I apologize, shrugging. 

"Go home." He orders in a lethargic voice, still slumped on the couch with his eyes closed. 

"I know, I'm going to."  I mumble as I tidy up the first aid box.  Seriously, Kai?   A thank you would be nice. 

I walk over to the pantry and put it back in its place.  "I hope you don't mind me stacking up your cupboards.  I thought it'd be nice to let Jongguk have homecooked meals as change from all the takeouts he's been having.  Ah, I also did your laundry for you.  There was a huge pile of it lying around.  Oh, Kai, Jongguk and I also made some aglio olio for dinner.  We made some for you as well.  Would you like me to heat it up?" 

"Iseul." 

"Yes?" I stop short.  Trust Kai to make a two-syllable word sound like a death threat. 

"Why are you doing this?   What do you want?" He asks, narrowing his eyes at me.

I blinked.  "What do I want?   I... Don't want anything!"

"Then why are you doing all this?"

"All this... What?" I look around, not quite following.

Kai sighs impatiently.  "Why are you doing my laundry, cooking for me and my son, buying him what he wants-- all you need to do is--"

"Why am I doing nice things, you mean?" I ask incredulously.  "Well, why not?"

Kai raises an eyebrow skeptically at me.

"I have the time and energy to help.  So why wouldn't I?"  I ask rhetorically.  "I figured that since you never seem to be at home doing your laundry might help.  Also, I thought that Jongguk might have had enough take outs for dinner so maybe some homecooked meals would be a nice change.  I got him a goldfish because you know what he said when I asked him why he wanted it so badly?  He said so that he'll have something to keep him company.  He feels lonely, Kai.  I'm not saying you should stick around more with him or anything, since I don't know what you do during the day neither is it my business to in your work, but if I can do something to make Jongguk feel better, like buying him a goldfish and making him dinner and spending time with him, I would.  It's just... Being nice.  Everyone likes something nice."  I say, stumbling through my explanation.  I'm not good at explaining things.  I'm not good with words. Things I say always come out rather shallow or less meaningful than I intend them to be.  They never leave that 'oomph' effect that hits someone right in the nerve and I can never finish off a long explanation like that with an applause-worthy bottom line.  

But what I do say, I do mean. 

Kai is still staring at me with endlessly skeptical, searching eyes.  I sigh.  Whatever has happened to that stony heart of his, I do not care.  "If you don't like what I'm doing then fine.  I'm sorry, I guess.  If you don't want the pasta either, I can just throw it away--"

"Heat it up for 45 seconds."  Kai cuts me off as he helps himself with a glass of water. 

I smile proudly.  "Aha, so you do want it!!"

Kai shoots me a look that can only translate to 'shut the up and hurry up and do as I say.'

I smile sheepishly at him before scampering away to the microwave oven...

Only to stare blankly at it.

"What the is this thing?!" I whisper to myself.  I mean- why does it have so many buttons?!!!

"That's a microwave."  Kai looks at me with half an eyebrow arched, as he leans on the wall across me.  "I can hear you."

"Hehe.  Sorry."  I bite my upper lip as I yank open the door and shove the plate of pasta in.  Okay, what next?  Defrost?  Thaw?  Wait, there's an option for chicken meat, pie, soup-- where's pasta??  How do I even--

"3 years and 2 meteor showers later..." Kai sings annoyingly as he watches me peer at the microwave from 30 different angles.

"How do I use thiiiis?" I whine, pointing at the stupid white box.  Relax, Iseul.  Zen.  THINK ZEN.  Oooohmmmaaaaaaa hoommmm.   Align your chakra!  Do not kick Kai.  Do not kick the microwave either.

"Don't tell me you've never used a microwave before?" Kai asks, narrowing his eyes.  "Now I'm starting to worry about what you did to my laundry."

"Yah!  I could handle that one!  But help me out here!" I pout, pointing at the darned machine.

Kai clucks his tongue before walking over to me.  "First, close the door."

"I know that!" I whine, trying not to slap him.

I feel Kai standing close behind me and nearly jump forward.  Jesus, respect the 30cm rule old man!  He steps aside a little and begins his explanation.  "Second, press this one right here with the clock above it, and then set it as long as you want.   Turn the knob to set the time.  Watch the numbers here.  Got it?"

"Mmhmm!  Now what's all the other buttons for?" I ask, about to press a random one.   But Kai's hands quickly swatted away my curious finger. 

"Yah, stick to what I told you!"  He barks.  Ish, he's so mean!!  Can't a girl wonder?   "And if I tell you everything, will you still remember by tomorrow morning??"

"Ish." I glare at him, before quickly catching myself.  Right, he's my boss.  Oops.

Kai goes over to sit at the couch as he waits for his pasta- and that's when he saw all 10 shopping bags filled with sweet, sugary goods, lying around by the wall.  "Oh wow.  Trying to give my son diabetes are we?  Just how much stuff did you buy today?!"

"I'll control his intake, don't worry!"  I say, trying not to snap.  "I only bought those snacks and some cookable stuff.  And Hawaii.  And Hawaii's food.  And Hawaii's home.  And a little more snack right there!  You should try some too, you know."

"I don't do sugary, sweet things, thank you very much."  Kai replies monotonously.  The microwave dings and I jump to get it. 

"Oh, right, Jongguk and I also got you some instant coffee mixes.  He says you love them."  I say as I place the food on the dining table.  

"I'm surprised you didn't buy me a treadmill machine as well." Kai mutters sarcastically, probably not listening to me. 

"Fine fine, I get it.  Here's your pasta.  Here's some water.  I'll go home.  Goodnight!" I chirp merrily, making my way to the door. 

"You really don't have to do this, you know."  I hear Kai say and I stop walking. 

"What, babysitting Jongguk and being nice?  I know.  But I want to.  I like it, really.  And he needs the company."  I say.  "I know I'm in no place to say this but... You should try being at home with him more.  He's a lot of fun."

Kai sighs and rests his head on the back of the couch.  "I can't..." He breathes in a strained whisper. 

"Well then.. Just let me do this."  I say, yawning.  "Alright, I'll see you tomorrow.  Hope you like the pasta!   Crushed red pepper right there on the counter.  Byeee!"

"Yah, Iseul, wait!" 

"Whattttt?" I whine.  I'm dying to go home.  I HAVE TO GET SOME ING SLEEP!  And I have to go ASAP because the later I leave the more drunken men and rapists might be out and about on the streets!

"It's late.  Tell the receptionist downstairs that Mr Jung is going to take you home.  Use my car." 

I'm taken aback.  I really didn't expect him to do that... "Woah, that really isn't necessary.  I can handle a few drunken men and--"

"Just do it before I change my mind."  Kai orders as he staggers over to the dining table.  "Go." 

I beam widely and give him a comedic salute.  "Thank you very much, sajangnim!"

With that I run out and ride the elevator down to the lobby.  Maybe Kai isn't as bad as he seems.  

Kai stares at the plate of Aglio olio in front of him.  How long has it been since he last ate something someone cooked for him at home?  All his life, it's always been bars, clubs, restaurants, take outs.. And when he does eat homecooked meals, it's Kyungsoo's cooking-- which tastes like wet paper.

He tentatively tries some, chewing slowly.  "Not bad." Kai murmurs begrudgingly to himself.  Reaching for the bottle of crushed red pepper, he sprinkles some over the pasta until he deems it enough. 

Suddenly, his phone rings.  Kai looks at the ID and sighs.  Chanyeol.  He must've found something.

"What?" Kai asks, in between chews.

"I don't know how.." Chanyeol sighs tiredly.  "Everything's clear.  It's like they popped out of nowhere.."

"Did the bomb planted beneath our car also pop out of nowhere?"

"It was those girls, Kai." 

"But how?!   They weren't even- they didn't even come anywhere near the car!" Kai cries frustratedly.  "Chanyeol, we didn't even take that car before we killed them.  We switched to that car in case someone was tailing us right after--"

"I know.  I knoooow."  Chanyeol moans, rubbing his temples.  "But good God, I don't know......"

Kai furiously shoves in another fork load of pasta.  "Whatever." He says in between chews.  "Let's just sort this out tomorrow.  We'll ask Kyungsoo too, and then we'll- , I don't know!!  I'm just exhausted-- jumping off an exploding car isn't really my thing.  Let's get to the bottom of this tomorrow."  Kai says, taking in another fork load.

"Kai, are you eating?!" Chanyeol gasps in disbelief.  "When did you order a delivery?"

"I didn't."

"Did you... did you cook?!"

"I didn't.  But apparently, that girl did."

"A GIRL?!"

"My babysitter, you idiot."  Kai sighs. 

"Thank goodness, I thought you brought one of your into the--"

"Spare me, Yeol.  Even the thought of it disgusts me." 

"I know, I know.  I don't know why I even said that.  So um,"  Chanyeol clears his throat, "tomorrow we'll.."

"We'll gather around and do some real investigation."  Kai says resolutely, swiftly switching back to cold-blooded-no-mercy-mobster mode.  "And then, we do some killing."

"You say killing like 'and then we eat'."  His friend says, chuckling lightly.  "Kai, as always.."

"Listen here Yeol.  I do not enjoy jumping off an exploding car snd nearly being hit by another one.  Something isn't right here.  Those girls weren't anywhere near those cars.  We didn't even rode those cars until we decided to switch in case those girls had backups tailing us.  And the bomb under the car-- the car that came from HOC--"

"Do you think that it could've been..."

"I've thought so too, but..."

"Damn, we need Kyungsoo on this.  Forget it.  Let's continue tomorrow.  I'm spent.  I've obly called to report to you that I, Park Chanyeol, for the first time, have found nothing.  This is some really... wicked attack."

"Who in the world..."

"Your father?" Chanyeol taunts, referring to what one of the girls said earlier today.

Kai's jaw hardened.  "He's dead."  He states stonily, before clicking the call off.  

"I'm heeeeeeereeeee~" I sing, raditiating sunshine and the positive chi of someone in high spirits.  I just had a very good night's sleep and nothing can knock me off my mountain of sunshine!!!  "Jongguk-ahhh!"

"Do you really have to be so noisy?" A deep voice that unfortunately does not belong to Jongguk growls from my left.  Uh oh.  

I whip around and find myself facing the one and only, Cyborg Father aka Kai!!   Kaizilla is standing on the pantry, opening a packet of the instant coffee Jongguk and I got him.  He already looks much better than when I last saw him last night.  It's amazing what sleep can do to you.

"Good morning!  Do you like them?" I ask him eagerly, placing my bag on the couch as usual. 

"What?"

"The coffee, of course."

He takes a sip and eyes the cup begrudgingly.  "It's not bad."

"Ha, you mean it's very good."  I say smugly.  "Where's Jongguk by the way?"

"He's taking a shower."

My jaw drops open in horror as I remember yesterday's encounter with... A post-shower Jongguk. 

"What?  Is he not allowed to do that?" Kai asks, seeing my panic-stricken face.

"No!!  No!!  Showers are good!!   Showers must be cherished!!   I love showers!!  Jongguk, don't take too long!  You have school!!"  I say, quickly backtracking. 

"Dunduuuuun!" A little high pitched voice emanates from the bathroom and a second later, the door flies open revealing the little rascal, Kim Jongguk.  He stands with his hands on his hips and one of his legs still poised in mid air like a ballerina.

"Did he just... Kick the door open?" I ask in disbelief.  "Yah, it's not like it's locked from the outside!  Jongguk-ah!  Don't keep on doing that!"

"Whyyy?" Jongguk (who is thankfully fully clothed) whines as he stomps over.

"It'll become a habit!  And then later, without realizing it, you'll be kicking open doors at school, the mall, your friend's house...  Imagine the DAMAGE!" I say.

"A habit?" He asks.

"Yeah, if you keep doing something, it becomes a habit."  I nod.  "So don't do bad things."  I say, wagging my finger.

"Oh."  Jongguk shrugs.  Then he looks at me as if he has something to say.

"What?" I ask.

"FOOOOOOOOOD!" he screams, before stomping off to the kitchen. 

I jump a little and quickly run over to him.  "Yah yah, wait!!  Here, let me prepare your breakfast for you..  Go put on your socks!!" 

Thankfully, he obeys and waddles away from the fridge he was about to ransack.  Tch, that kid.  Lesson #1 in Handling Kim Jongguk:  tame him with food.  I have a feeling that more lessons are yet to come in the Great Book of Handling Kim Jongguk.   On second thought, I can write a book with this material!  How to Tame Your Children by Seo Iseul.   

Taking out the lychee yogurt we got yesterday at Target, I strip the plastic seal off.  Ok.. Now blueberries.. Blueberries where-- oh! 

"What are you doing?" 

I look up in surprise and see Kai leaning on door of the fridge.  He eyes me a little suspiciously and peers over the door. 

"Salad?" He asks, his nose wrinkling disdainfully. 

I let out a little snort. "Yeah, salad with lychee yogurt as a dressing." 

Kai's eyes widen in surprise and I clear my throat.  Somebody obviously did not get my sarcasm. But why.. IS HE STUPID? 

"Eeii.  I was kidding.  I'm making a breakfast classic- berries in yogurt!"

"Berries?"

I look at him like he suddenly grew an extra head.  Has he never had breakfast like this before?   Come on, this is much easier than toast!!  All you do is dump the berries in a jar, tip in the yoghurt, mix, and eat!  This also works with granola which is also highly beneficial for your body!

"Um....." I say slowly.  "Have you not eaten something like this before?   Yah, I'm sure you have!  It's the easiest meal ever!"

The expressionless expression in his face remains and I feel a little bad for him.  Okay... So maybe he isn't the DIY food kind of person.  "Don't worry!  Now's a good time to try!   I'll make some for you too!" I grin, patting his shoulder and shutting the fridge door close. 

Fetching two little jars that probably were once peanut butter or jam jars,