Past Secrets

Miss Pariah

When Jieun woke up the next morning, she wasn't feeling so well. She had slept on thought of Jiyong having a lover, and that only made her feel sick. She found herself cuddling next to Minah, who was protectively squeezed between her and Jiho. Jiho was still sleeping, but the pain he was feeling from all the bruises and scars was evident in his expression. She moved, but stopped when she realized that someone had placed a blanket around her. She looked around, trying to figure out who it could be until she spotted Jiyong still awake with the detective.

Her eyes wandered around the room, searching for Jiyong's fiancé. Jiyong, feeling eyes staring at his back, turned around with dark circles below his eyes. He forced a smile to Jieun and got up, stumbling over to her side.

"Good morning," he said. "Did you sleep well?"

She almost thought that she went green. How could he ask her such a simple question in such a caring voice? It didn't make sense for her.

"Somehow," she muttered. She looked at Seunghyun, whose eyes were red and droopy. "Were you two up all night?"

"Yeah. Seunghyun is currently tracking down any other websites that might have those pictures of Minah," Jiyong said. "Right now, we've managed to attach a virus with the image. If you open the pictures, a virus will come."

"Isn't that illegal?" Jieun asked.

"Not exactly. This virus will self-destruct the photo and eat up the screen. It's a nasty one, but it'll definitely prevent the photo from spreading," Jiyong explained.

"Then what were you doing?"

"I was trying to figure out a way to directly connect us to the host of the image. Seunghyun is almost done. He finished ninety-percent of the job."

"How about the other ten percent?"

Jiyong stared at her, wondering if he should reveal his plans. Then, he got up and grabbed a hat from the counter. As he slipped on his coat, Jieun noticed that Jiyong kept flexing his fingers. He turned and forced a small smile.

"The ten percent is on me," he told her. "I'm going to give Chanyeol a lesson."

Jieun's eyes widened. "You can't possibly think of beating him up."

"Jieun," Jiyong said. He gazed at her with a cold, deathly stare. "I already warned Chanyeol before when Jiho got beaten up. Don't be surprised if we find him dead later today."

He walked outside and closed the door. Jieun tried to get up, but Seunghyun raised his hand to stop her.

"Don't worry. I already got the bodyguards to accompany him," Seunghyun said, his fingers tapping across the keyboard.

Jieun frowned. "But Jiyong…"

"You can't possibly do anything," Seunghyun stated firmly. "When Jiyong is in his devil mode, it's best to leave this to the guards."

Her eyes widened. "Are you saying that he's violent?"

Seunghyun glanced over his shoulder. "Not exactly. If karma doesn't do its job, then Jiyong will do it for it. That's just the type of guy he is."

"Isn't that bad? Shouldn't we stop him?"

"It's good," he argued. "It's good because it shows that it cares."

"So what's he going to do?" Jieun asked. "Violence is never the answer."

"Oh, Jiyong's going to kill Chanyeol," Seunghyun said. "He's very serious about his words." Jieun dropped her jaws, shaking a bit. "It's okay, though. The bodyguards will know how to deal with him. He's not as fit as he was before, he definitely doesn't have the strength to go on a full rampage."

"You make it sound as if Jiyong is a monster. It's like you guys don't treat him as a human being," Jieun said, glaring at him.

Seunghyun looked at Jieun with complete amusement. "We make it sound like he's a monster? No, no. Little girl, you got it all wrong." He stared back at the computer screen, typing away. "It's him who treated us like pawns. You don't know anything about my friend, and I pity you for that."

"I don't see Jiyong the way you do." She paused. "And I'm sure that his fiancée doesn't see him like that, either."

Seunghyun let out a small scoff. "You mean Sandara?"

Sandara. A beautiful name for a beautiful woman. Jieun only grew more envious.

"Yes, Sandara," she said, nodding her head. She sighed. "I didn't even know that Jiyong was engaged…"

"You didn't? I remember him bragging all about that before," Seunghyun said, surprised.

Jieun only shook her head. "Anyway, if she truly loves him, then she wouldn't think that Jiyong was just using her."

"Little girl," Seunghyun started, sighing, "has the thought ever occurred to you that maybe it was Jiyong who planned the marriage and only wanted to use Sandara because of her appearance and social status? She's a daughter of a rich company owner. He didn't even think of marrying her for love. It's all about the money for him. Money, money, money…"

He left her flabbergasted with absolutely nothing else to say. She only sealed her lips and waited for the others to wake up. She couldn't wait until these people left them alone. Once they were gone, things were going to be normal. Things would go back to the way things were. Everyone would be happy again.

Unfortunately, life had different ideas in store for her.

* * *

Jiyong looked up at the building, then glanced back down at the piece of paper he had. He quickly crumbled the paper and turned to the two bodyguards.

"Come closer," he told them. "Keep a close eye on me. This guy is crazy, so I'm willing to go crazy, too."

They only nodded. Jiyong walked up to the door and pressed the doorbell. He waited, knowing very well that Chanyeol was inside. After a few minutes, the door swung open. Chanyeol, who was having a major hang-over, looked at Jiyong with blood red eyes and dilated pupils.

"Damn it," Chanyeol muttered, running his hand over his face. "I'm hallucinating, now?"

"No, it's not," Jiyong said. "It's not a hallucination. Here, let me help knock some sense into that puny mind of yours."

With one quick punch, Chanyeol found himself tumbling backwards. Understanding that this was no time for him to daze around, Chanyeol quickly attempted to get up. However, Jiyong kicked him in the abdomen, forcing him to stay down. The taller boy let out a grunt before throwing a punch at Jiyong's knee. Jiyong flinched and backed away, giving time for Chanyeol to get up again.

Chanyeol clenched his teeth before throwing another punch at Jiyong. However, the adult managed to dodge the attack by ducking and aimed for an opening. He tackled Chanyeol's rib again, causing the boy to cry out in pain. Before Chanyeol recovered, Jiyong plunged in and threw a punch at Chanyeol and reached for his neck. His fingers wrapped themselves around Chanyeol's neck, marking finger prints. Chanyeol tried kicking, but Jiyong pressed on. 

"You deserve to die, bastard," Jiyong muttered under his breath. He pressed his thumb against Chanyeol's throat.

Chanyeol tried to pry off Jiyong's fingers, but he only made the skin peel and bleed. He started making strange sounds with his vocal box, muttering inaudible words in a hazy language. His face began to turn purple and he was no longer able to breathe. His heart raced, he kicked some more, he tried to grab ahold of Jiyong's neck, but nothing worked. His mind only focused on attempting to pry Jiyong off of him, but his body wasn't functioning like he wanted.

At that very moment, the two bodyguards, who were watching Jiyong attempt to murder the teenager, quickly ran towards them. They forced Jiyong off of Chanyeol, who finally managed to gasp for air. Chanyeol gagged, gasping desperately for oxygen. He held onto his neck, his large hands shaking as his eyes rolled over to Jiyong, who looked at him with eyes of a serial killer. They were horribly maddening, much to Chanyeol's terror.

"You're god damn lucky," Jiyong told him. He spat on the floor without any care. "I was planning to lose these guys on my way here, but I knew that things would get bloodier if I told them to leave me alone. You're such a lucky bastard." He looked around, kicking random objects on the floor. "Where's your damn phone?" He snapped his fingers at the guards. "Find his phone. If you find it, bring it to me. Find any piece of technology he has."

They obeyed. They searched around, thrashing the home to find the small device. As Chanyeol tried to recover, he tried to threaten Jiyong.

"Y…You don't have a warrant. I-I can sue you," Chanyeol said in a hoarse voice. He flinched when Jiyong eyed at him with insane eyes.

"Oh? You want to sue me? Well, here's the thing kid. I can get Minah to sue you for violating her privacy and for much more. You can be sued for abuse if Jieun really needs to report you for that. Jiho can even sue you for assault, too. Do you really want to go there?" Jiyong walked over to Chanyeol and stomped on his hand. The boy howled, but Jiyong only treated his hand like a used cigarette. "You can ruin your family's life and your own life if we go to the law. You'll never see the day light again. I swear, you will never if we go to the court."

Chanyeol's body shook. The terrifying aura Jiyong had fell around him. He trembled before him, unable to say a word

Jiyong clicked his tongue and stepped on Chanyeol's hand one last time. He let out a hellish cry, but Jiyong didn't care. This bastard deserved it.

"What is this?" Jiyong murmured. "You're not even that scary. You're so weak when you're on your own."

"We found his phone," one of the guards said. "We also found his tablet and laptop."

"Good," Jiyong said, walking away from Chanyeol. "Bring those to me. Let me see them."

They did as they were told. Jiyong quickly looked through each device, tapping the screen with ease and typing things on the keyboard. After a moment, he tossed the electronics next to Chanyeol's side. The boy gasped and pressed his back against the wall, holding up an arm to protect himself.

Jiyong scoffed.

"Disgusting," said Jiyong. "I hope you rot in hell. You might want to think over your life now. Those things are filled with viruses now. You'll want new ones." Before he stepped out of the house, he turned to Chanyeol. "Really. Think about your life for once. Idiot."

In just matters of days, Jiyong heard that Chanyeol had dropped out of school with unknown personal reasons and had left the town. Since then, no one had made contact with Chanyeol, nor had anyone talked to him. He had completely disappeared in everyone's lives, along with the pictures of Minah and Jiho. Minah slowly recovered and Jiho's scars faded. Everything resumed to their own peaceful ways, but the autumn storm was still there to disturb the groups' peace.

* * *

On one particular autumn evening, Jiyong found himself sitting in a café across Seunghyun and Sandara. The three sipped their coffee quietly as the two kept looking at Jiyong with a judgmental expression. Previously, they had begged Jiyong to wear some more appropriate clothing instead of a fleece jacket and a pair of sweatpants. In the end, he won the argument, mainly because the two didn't want to lose their grip on Jiyong.

"Black coffee, hm?" Seunghyun murmured, staring at the cup of coffee Jiyong had in front of him. "At least that hasn't changed."

"He's changed, but lots of things stayed the same," Sandara said, smiling. "After this, should we have dinner? I know a great restaurant a couple of minutes away. We can take the limo—"

"Sorry, but I need to go back home after this. I got three kids who're sleeping over, and the last time I let one alone, drastic things happened," Jiyong said. "I only agreed to come out for a cup of coffee to keep my end of deal."

"Yes, yes. Of course," Seunghyun muttered. He sighed. "Did anyone know about your position? That you were the son of a billionaire?"

Jiyong slumped in his seat. "Not really. I never told anyone. No one really asked."

"Really? You didn't even tell the manager?"

"Nope. Why?"

"Since I got your locations and I actually know that you're here, I did some research on my own. Your manager isn't the man you think he is," Seunghyun said. "He used to be a wealthy businessman. With the money he made, he spent it on the store you work in and to pay for the medical bills."

"What do you mean?"

"What I'm trying to say is that your manager seemed to have known who you were. He did a good job of hiding you. I'd press charges against him, but he seems like he has some family issues. I decided to leave him be and only sent him a letter," Seunghyun explained.

Jiyong kept quiet. He made a mental note to talk to his manager about this matter. Now that he thought about it, it was definitely strange how the manager could close the shop so often if that was his only job.

"Anyway, I'm surprised that you were about to keep very quiet about your personal life. The kids didn't seem to know that you were engaged. One of the girls seemed very bitter about that," Seunghyun commented.

Jieun, Jiyong thought, widening his eyes. He couldn't believe that he had forgotten about her feelings. He wondered how she had reacted to the truth. The guilt caused his back to straighten and for him to sip his coffee with a sour expression.

Sandara blinked her eyes, surprised. She looked at Jiyong for a moment, then laughed softly before tucking a strand of hair behind her back. She looked down at her tea and wrapped her fingers around the cup.

"I can't believe you didn't tell anyone that you were engaged," Sandara murmured.

"Why not? Our relationship always had many secrets," Jiyong said casually, his voice straining with detest.

"Secrets?" She took a sip of her tea. "I don't remember such a thing."

He made a fist under the table. "Then do you want me to remind you?"

"Please do," she said calmly, gesturing her hand for him to continue.

He paused, trying to think twice before he actually leaked out all the secrets he knew. Was this a good idea? Probably not, but this would hopefully help him get rid of them.

"You and Seunghyun." He waited, trying to see any signs of flinching or guilt. When he saw none, he pressed on. "Classroom." They slowly raised their eyes and looked at him. "A kiss." They calmly placed their cups on the table. "A baby."

Sandara broke first. She choked on her drink while it took some time for Seunghyun to understand what Jiyong knew. He stared at the thin man with utter shock until Sandara managed to compose herself.

"W-Why do you know that?" she asked him in her croaky voice.

Jiyong casually sipped his coffee. "Why wouldn't I know?"

"When did this start?" Seunghyun asked seriously. "When did you stalk us? When did you figure it out?"

"I knew something was up when I accidentally walked into the classroom and saw you two kiss. You guys were too engaged in your own world so you never took notice. From then on, I stared to meet with Sandara less and less. Eventually, I hired someone to spy on you two. After a few weeks on the job, he came to me and discovered that you were pregnant. He even brought me pictures of the ultrasound scan. I recall not meeting you for the last six months during those days, so it was reasonable for me to conclude that the child was not mine, but it was Seunghyun." He coldly glowered at her. "I can't believe you slept with my best friend while you were still engaged with me."

"I thought you'd understand," Seunghyun muttered. "I always told you that I loved her. I told you how much I loved her, even before you planned the engagement."

"I was going to slide things with the kiss, but a child? That was too much," Jiyong said bitterly. He turned to Sandara, who stared down at her drink with shame. "Besides, you never called me or visited me. What was the point of us getting married when there wasn't a hint of love in our relationship?"

"You loved money," she argued. "How was I supposed to fight for your affection when you loved something tangible? You never gave me the chance. Besides, you're the one who said that marriage would be fine as long as the wife came with benefits. I came with benefits. I should've at least done what I wanted to do."

"Good point," Jiyong agreed, nodding his head. He looked down at the drink and saw a reflection of himself. His facial expression softened. "So, when I discovered that you were pregnant for five weeks, I left. I ran away with absolutely nothing." He looked at Seunghyun. "So where's the child now? I never saw it in the news, so I assume that it's been hidden from the public, right? That seems reasonable. Having a child that's not mine would definitely ruin all of our company's images. Stock prices would go down and—"

"Jiyong," Seunghyun interrupted. He stared at him in a serious manner. "If you want to talk about the baby, leaving Sandara out of this. If you want to talk about the child, talk about it with me in private."

"No," Sandara said. She pressed her lips together and stared at Jiyong. "Seunghyun, please leave the two of us alone for a minute."

He stared at her. "But—"

"It's okay," she said softly. "I can handle this alone."

"Then what do I do—"

"Wait outside or in the car. You have to go somewhere anyway, right?" she asked, eyeing him. He stared, worried, but eventually left her side. He rose from his chair and began to walk out of the café with his hands in his pocket.

When the two were alone, they kept quiet. Silence enveloped their conversation except for the occasional sips of their drinks. Finally, Sandara took a deep breath and placed one hand gently on her stomach.

"You want to know about the baby, right?" she asked him gently.

"Yes," he said, nodding his head. "I want to hear all about it."

"Well, you're lucky that you don't have to hear all about it," she said. She let out a heavy chuckle. "I…had a miscarriage."

The mood had changed. Anger had melted into pity and pain. Jiyong stared at her, surprised. That was one answer he had not been expecting.

"It was my fault," she continued. Her voice began smaller with each breath of words that trickled down from her lips. "When you left, the company was in chaos. It was flooded with partners and workers from the small branch. When I was trying to get through a large crowd and to the office, someone knocked me down and I ended up falling down the stairs. Then…" She forced out a small laugh. "Do you know how painful it is when the baby dies like that? I think it's more unbearable than giving birth to the child."

"I'm sorry," Jiyong repeated. He wasn't sure what he was sorry for, but he felt the need to apologize. 

"What did you do wrong?" she asked him as if she was reading his mind. "Besides you, me, and Seunghyun, that child does not exist in anyone else's mind."

"That still doesn't stop you from eloping, right?" Jiyong asked. "Why haven't you guys run away yet?"

She looked at him with disbelief. "Run away? When have I ever tried to run away from a problem?"

"This isn't running away from a problem. It's the solution to your problem," Jiyong said.

"Really? When has running away ever solved anyone's problems?"

"Several times. I can't list them right now, but lots have—"

"Jiyong, I can't believe you're telling me this," Sandara said. "Why would I ever elope with Seunghyun? It's not worth it."

"Really? I'm pretty sure it was worth it back in high school and college," Jiyong retorted. He knew exactly where this dumb conversation was going, and he knew that he had to prevent it from going in that direction. However, he couldn't. If he wanted to get anywhere with her, he'd have to go in that direction.

"Are you being serious? Jiyong, it was just a fling. A fling," she said, emphasizing the last word. She scrunched her eyebrows.

"You guys love each other, right? You still do. I can see the way you look at him. The way you look at me are different."

"I can't elope," Sandara repeated. "I can't elope with Seunghyun. It's just not worth all the risk—"

"Elope already!" Jiyong shouted. He made a fist and glared at her. "Just elope with him already! You love each other, right? You even had a baby behind my back! Why don't you two just run away from all this mess and elope—"

Before he had the chance to yell at her again, she threw her hand across his cheek. The cold burning feeling stung his cheeks. He finally looked at her eye-to-eye, and noticed that her eyes were teary. She looked down at her hand, shocked at what she had done. Then, with a shaky sigh, she looked down at the ground in shame.

"I'm so sorry," she whispered, "but you don't understand how difficult it is to elope."

"What's so difficult about running away? You have the money," he pointed out, clenching his teeth. His cheeks still trembled, aching from the sharp contact. "He has money, too."

"You don't understand!" Sandara exclaimed, raising her voice. She looked up at him with teary eyes. "Do you understand how difficult it is to run away and to live off on your own? Sure, we might love each other now, but what if we lose that feeling when we disappear off to the darker parts of the world? There's too many risks in eloping, Jiyong. Besides, I'm a woman. My family would try to search for me ten times more than your family did. I'm not someone who can go out there and make a world for myself. There's a higher chance that I'll encounter danger." She bit her bottom lip. "I told myself that if the baby made it, that if I gave birth to his child, then I would elope with Seunghyun. He was ready for that. Then, when the miscarriage happened…" She hitched her breath. "It was a disgusting sign, you know? It was like I was being told that I was forbidden to be in love with another man."

He didn't say anything. He only listened to her breathing, the way she tried to calm herself down because she was getting emotional over talking about the child. 

"I'm sorry," he muttered. "I shouldn't have pushed you."

"So you're coming back?" she asked him in a hopeful manner. "You're coming back, right?"

"I…" Jiyong sighed and ran his fingers through his hair. "I don't know."

"You know," Sandara said, looking at him directly in his eyes. "You always know the answers, Jiyong." She paused. "You've became more hesitant."

"What do you mean?"

"Whenever you knew the answers, you'd do it. You'd say it aloud. There was no hint of doubt in your voice. Now…" Her eyes rolled over to the window, then back at him. "There's a lot of doubt. Lots of insincerity. Is it because you don't want to leave someone's side…?"

Jiyong clenched his teeth. He saw Jieun flash before his eyes, but he only looked down at the ground.

"Let's go," Jiyong muttered. "Take me home to my house."

"Is that it?" Sandara asked, worried. "Are you not coming back—"

"I'm thinking!" Jiyong exclaimed, raising his voice again. She refused to flinch, and Jiyong noticed. "I just want to think a bit… So take me to the house I currently live."

Sandara gulped and pressed her lips. "I understand. Let's go, then."

The two got up from their seats, had Seunghyun pay, and left the café.

Not too far from the table the three were sitting at, another group of three sat down. Their drinks were cold and untouched since they were too interested with the adult's conversation. The three finally got up, paid for their drinks, and walked outside, where they saw the adults get into a large limousine.

Out of the blue, Jieun let out a small sigh. Jiho, who took immediate noticed, gently tapped her arm.

"What's wrong, Jieun?" Jiho asked, turning around. Minah turned, trying to figure out what was going on. Jieun continued to stare at the limousine, which slowly disappeared over the hill.

Then, in a small regrettable voice, she said, "I hate myself."

Minah blinked her eyes. "Woah. For what?"

"Why?" Jiho added.

"I hate myself because I can't hate her," Jieun whispered.

"What does that mean? Jieun, she's taking Jiyong away from us. Of course you have to hate her!" Minah exclaimed. Her eyes darkened. "It's just like hating that Chanyeol bastard. There's no difference."

"No," Jieun disagreed, shaking her head. "I can't hate her."

"Why not?" Jiho asked.

"She's…too much like me," Jieun mumbled. She looked at her friends. "I can relate to her feelings. I understand the feeling of love that won't ever happen. I understand how it feels to elope and doubts in eloping. She's just like me except…" She grimaced. "Except she's making all the right decisions."

"So you support her taking Jiyong away?" Minah asked carefully.

Jieun tried to smile, but she couldn't. An ugly, twisted expression appeared on her face, clearly expressing her distaste in her thoughts.

"I do," she answered, "and I hate myself for that."

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500sunny500
11/14/15: I'm just letting you guys know that the sequel to "Miss Pariah" has been posted. Check the foreword if you want to check out the sequel!

Comments

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UaenaExoticInspirit
#1
Chapter 35: This story is amazing! I read the last chapter with tears in my eyes. This is definitely one of the best fanfics I have ever read. I kinda regret not reading this earlier lol
GreenFlash #2
Chapter 35: While i read this story i thought i was reading a plot for a drama or something. And i really hoped till the end that GD and IU would finally end up as a couple •_•
But i really liked the story. It was really well written and emotional:)
BangMind
#3
Chapter 35: Omg I thought Minah and Jiho would end up together (they had some romantic scenes too ;(
The saddest part was IU and GD :((( the last chapters were kind of rush and I hate how GD depends on other's health condition :/
I hate that last line, too T-T
BangMind
#4
Chapter 24: OMG. this fiction needs more subscribers.
It's so freaking awesome how you painted a beautiful picture with all four beautiful people (but they have flaws, too. which even makes it better and realistic).
I think people tend to read only about their idols, so when you try to tell a lot about Jiho and Minah I think that's why the story doesn't get the population it deserves. (I'm really glad to read though because I'm a fan of all four haha)
This story is going really well. I really love your writing! I love GD's character so much :) and of course the rest three as well.
And get well soon, author-nim? (I saw your status just now ^^)