Listen to: Miracles in December - Exo K

“One more!” I said slamming the glass on the table.. I saw the hesitance to the bartenders face but he pour another liquor on my glass and I drink it straight feeling the burning sensation on my throat..

Why isn’t the pain fading away? I thought they say that when you drink your problems away, you will momentarily forget about it.. but why? Why am I still in pain?

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“That’s where you belong!” one of the 5 year old girls tell me as I was sitting on the floor of the hall way with tears streaming out of my eyes.. I can’t do anything.. I was a weak, powerless, crying baby little girl..

It was my first day on kinder but my classmates bully me already because I was the weakest, they say..

I was sobbing and looking on the floor when someone stood in front of me and block me from all the bullies..

“Ya! Is that how you treat someone? Is that what teacher taught you all?” he said and I look up to see this boy glaring at my attackers..

“Yoongi oppa! why are you on her side? ><” one girl ask.. “because she’s different.. I know she is..” he said and the girls cross their tiny hands on their chest and glare back on the boy..

“whatever! We hate you, Yoongi oppa!” they say in unison then they run away.. the boy then turn to me and offer to help me stand.. when I was face to face with him I felt like I’ve found my guardian angel..

“Are you alright?” he ask softly and I nod wiping away my tears with my hands..

“I’m Yoongi by the way ^^ you are?” he said offering a handshake.. I stare at his hand for a while before I accept it.. “Sooji..” I said..

-After 10 years-

“Ya! Min Yoongi you come back here!!! Give that to me!” I shout as we’re on our way home from our first day in middle school..

“Andwae! I need to read it first!” he said running faster and I was starting to get tired so I stop and took a few breath before I proceed to running after him again.. aishh! My best friend is the most stubborn person! ><

We reach to the park near our house, which by the way is just across each other.. he sit on one of the bench and stretch his arms where the letter is while he hold me on my forehead so I won’t proceed any further..

“Dear new seatmate, I’m really glad that you’re my seatmate..” he started and I was struggling to get out of his hand.. “YA! DON’T READ IT TOO LOUDLY! ><” I said but he still continue..

“.. maybe we could go out sometime and watch a movie or just scroll around.. See you tomorrow :)” he finish reading and he release me.. I snatch the letter immediately..

“Aish! How dare you read it out loud ><” I said putting the letter on my bag.. when I turn back to Yoongi he was staring at me seriously then he pull me closer until our faces were just a few inches apart..

“do you like the guy?” he ask and I cant process well what he was saying cause he was so close.. I gulp then I shook my head.. he sigh, looking like he’s relief..

“good! Because I don’t want you to go out with him..” he said then he let me go.. I calm my beating heart first before I look at him again.. “why? Why cant I date him?” I ask wanting to hear what I’m dying to hear from him..

“Because..! because it’s not yet the right time for you to think about those kind of things!” he said.. I pout.. that’s not what I’m expecting..

“Ne APPA!” I said teasing him and he come back with his playful self.. “appa? Me? your appa?” he said and he give me the get-ready-to-run look and so I run away from him with a high pitch scream when he almost catch me.. he’s my best friend, my tutor, my savior, my shoulder to cry on, my most trusted person, my oppa, and mostly.. my first love..

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The bar closed down and so I just ordered a soju and left.. I walk around Seoul, sipping on the soju on my hand.. I don’t care if people look at me weirdly or if I bump with them..

I want to feel numb.. even just for today.. for tonight.. I want to forget about all those memories.. those lovely memories which I treasure a lot.. I want to forget about him.. about my love for him.. even just for tonight..

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A few more years go by and we’re now in senior high school.. everything went well with me and Yoongi well except the petty fights that we have, like yesterday.. it’s all because I forget to tell him