Related to Chapter 15

It's been a week since Baekhyun told his husband that he's ready to have a child. Chanyeol was ecstatic, his heart almost burst out and he tell his wife that he loved him so much, that it's okay to wait for some more as that's what Chanyeol had been doing since the start, trying hard and waiting until Baekhyun's ready to receive and embrace his love.

Baekhyun was nervous. He'd been waiting for his husband to started it but the tall man only kiss and hug him on their way to sleep, never once he tried to make a move and it burdened Baekhyun. He wanted to make love already and made sure he has baby inside of him but that's wrong. That's so wrong and Baekhyun wanted to back away, telling his husband that he changed his mind.

But what if Chanyeol dissapointed? What if he's angry at him, even worse, hate him? Baekhyun was scared, having a child was a huge responsibility for him.

Baekhyun didn't have a good memory of his childhood, his parents divorced when he's seven and it's hard for him to move back and forth from his mother to his father house. It was tiring and he developed a feeling that he didn't want to have a family. He wanted to just live alone, being safe by himself and although he wanted to be love so badly he's scared that he will repeat what his parents did.

But then he met Chanyeol, a man who's creppy with his huge grin at their first meeting. He ignored Chanyeol who straightforwardly saying that he liked him, want to know him better. He thought by not giving him any attention will make the taller man give up but Chanyeol's different. He kept trying and trying and his personalities slowly melted Baekhyun's icy heart.

Baekhyun felt it again, the tightening on his chest, the way he couldn't breath, the loud sound of his heartbeat ringing on his head and it's for a different cause this time. It wasn't because he's scared of imagining a relationship when someone confessed to him, it's because of Chanyeol's smile. His voice, his touch, his kindness and his everything, Baekhyun wanted it all.

For the first time Baekhyun wanted someone and have a family with him.

 

"Baekhyun?"

Baekhyun's sitting on their bed with his back leaning on the pillows. The room was dark and Chanyeol just got home, confused and surprised finding his wife still awake. Baekhyun usually slept first when Chanyeol told him he's going home late.

"Why aren't you sleeping?" Chanyeol sat on the bed, turning on the night lamp and saw Baekhyun's face only to gasped in shock. Baekhyun's crying, tears falling freely on his cheeks and Chanyeol opened his arms, calling for his wife. "Baekhyun-ah..."

Baekhyun throw himself to Chanyeol's chest, hugging his husband dearly and continued crying there while the taller whispering those sweet words with his deep voice. The smaller could smell Chanyeol's faint scent combined with his sweat. His husband kissed his head couple of times, rubbing his back and hummed some melodies that calmed Baekhyun for a little.

"What happened?" Chanyeol asked after Baekhyun's cry turned to sniffle, "Did you have a nightmare?"

The slight shook of Baekhyun's head was the reply he got.

"What is it then, hm? Do you want to tell me?" Chanyeol cooed, leaning away a little to see Baekhyun's face, his eyes puffy and more tears were threathening to fall. Chanyeol smiled gently, giving kisses on the smaller face, from his forehead, nose, cheeks, and lips. He felt Baekhyun pressing himself when he landed on his lips, the smaller's hand gripped hard at his shirt.

"I'm scared..." Baekhyun whispered.

"Of what?" Chanyeol brushed Baekhyun's hair, putting his hand on Baekhyun's cheek as the latter leaned on it.

Baekhyun gulped, staring at Chanyeol's gentle orbs and sniffled again. His eyes moved down and Chanyeol followed, seeing Baekhyun had his hand on his stomach. Chanyeol frowned, trying to understand the meaning of it.

"I want it, but I'm scared..." Baekhyun whispered. "Will the baby be okay? Can I take care of the baby? What if...what if..." he bit his lips and turned his head aside, not wanting Chanyeol to see him crying again but his husband turned his head back to him.

"Baekhyun-ah..."

"I'm scared..." Baekhyun repeated. Tears started falling again and Chanyeol sighed before he leaned down to pressed their lips together again. Baekhyun knew what Chanyeol's trying to do, that's why he pushed Chanyeol before he could succeed, telling him silently that a kiss won't calm him down this time.

Chanyeol stared at Baekhyun's trembling body. He looked smaller wearing his shirt that's too big on him and Baekhyun moved back, away from Chanyeol that it hurted the taller man. Baekhyun's pulling himself from Chanyeol again, like the first time.

"Baekhyun..."

"Chanyeol, please...I'm not ready...c-can we wait a little more? Just a little bit more...please? Please, I'm just..." ragged breathing came from Baekhyun, the panic came attacking him and Chanyeol took his hands, holding it while telling him to calm down.

"Breath, Baekhyun. Breath slowly, come on, count one till five with me..."

Baekhyun followed Chanyeol's instruction, staring at those big eyes and breath together with him. He calmed down again and Chanyeol smiled, rubbing the back of his hand and tell him to relax.

"It's okay. I'll wait for you. Don't worry, Baekhyun. Take as many time as you want, I'll be here. I won't go anywhere, I'm here from the start and I will be here until the end. I'm okay as long as you're okay, just take it slowly, hm? I love you, Baekhyun. I don't want to rush this. I'm happy that you take one step further and I'll wait for you next step, so don't think about it. Just feel it, you'll know when the right time comes."

Baekhyun nodded, he let go of Chanyeol's hands and come closer to put his hands on the taller's shoulders.

"I love you too, Chanyeol. Thank you for being so nice to me. I promised it won't take long, just a little bit...wait for a little bit more and I'll be ready. You'll make love with me and I'll be carrying our baby..." Baekhyun pressed his lips to his husband for a second, pulling back to see Chanyeol's eyes were glistening with tears.

Chanyeol pecked Baekhyun's lips, smiling down to him and closed his eyes with a sigh. "Yeah, that sounds like a good idea..."

Baekhyun slept on his husband's embrace that night with a faint smile on his lips as he dreamed of a little boy on Chanyeol's arms, both of them smiling at him and he saw himself. He looked content, feeling like he's the luckiest guy on earth for having such a lovely family.