“Sohee-sshi…”




Seunghyun called her… she already saw them before he does… she looked back again at the couple outside… and more pain struck her… she closed her eyes and sighed before turning back to him.




“Seunghyun-sshi… we have to talk…” she told him




“But… they… what’s happening…?”




Seunghyun stuttered as he was pointing at the couple outside… he struggled from her hold and really wanted to go outside even though he doesn’t know how to start asking them.




“I have to tell you something important about Dara… please…”




Sohee plead to him… he looked down at her first… then looked back at the couple… for a while he watched them even it costs him his heart…. In the end he nodded to her thinking that maybe it would clear out what he saw.




---




He doesn’t know what made him do that to her… he was supposed to suppress himself once again but when he saw her standing outside, hugging her self against the night’s cold wind... he finally couldn’t control himself anymore… he wanted to hold her again… give her his warmth… make her feel secured just like he used to do… smell her sweet scent once again…




And so without thinking twice… setting aside the reality… forgetting everything for once and just go with the flow of his heart… he took the opportunity that maybe he would regret later or maybe not…. He doesn’t care…. He wants her to be his again… even just for a while.




“Ji….?”




She called him once again…. But he just stayed quiet…. Tightening his hold to her more… she’s still in shock but after a while, managed to snap out… she reached for his arm which were securely s around her waist… this is wrong… why is he doing this…? She thought.




She held his arm and tried to pull it off her… but no matter what she does, he won’t budge off.




“Don’t… please… let’s just stay like this…. I can’t take it anymore Dara…. Please….”




He closed his eyes…. Buried his face on her neck… feeling her scent…. The scent that he have missed for three years… her eyes widened as she felt herself stiffened… her body totally weakened by his hug…. His hot breath which lingered around her neck brought shivers down her spine….




Silence enveloped them for a while…. The once cold night got replaced as both of their bodies gave off warmth for each other.




“I miss this….”




He broke the silence first…. He whispered to her neck, his eyes still closed and hugged her waist more… which totally drove her crazy.




She doesn’t know what to feel… all she knows is the confusion he’s giving her right now… she doesn’t know if she should feel happy… that finally she heard those words from him… that finally she felt his warmth once again….




She doesn’t know if she should be sad because she knows that at the end of this night… they would be back to being what they are now... strangers…




And she doesn’t know if she should be guilty…. For she’s now loving this feeling… the feeling of being in the arms of his once lover… in the arms of her best friend’s lover.




“Ji… why…? Why are you doing this….? They might see us…?”




She said weakly… her strength betrayed her already…. She struggled from his hold one last time but she failed to escape…




“I don’t know Dara… I don’t know… I don’t care if they see us or not….”




He whispered…. She felt her heart did a somersault with what she heard… she thinks that she’ll die not because of her illness but maybe because of this man’s sudden moves… but no… she must not fall for it… for maybe he’s just in his right mind… she thought




“Ji… what’s wrong…?”




Then suddenly… she felt something warm and wet landed on her shoulder… she glanced back and saw him crying on her shoulder… his eyes are still closed… she finally escaped his arms… she turned around and cupped his face with both of her hands as one of her hand held her toy.




“Why are you crying…. huh…? Tell me…”




She asked worriedly and then he hugged her again… her back arched for he held her tight… she didn’t struggled but instead cooed him… his back to comfort him… she doesn’t want to see him cry… the last time she saw him cried was when he thought she would break up with him because of his great jealousy over her fan boys.




“Dara… I miss you so much… do you know how much pain you brought me when you left…? You almost killed me and my heart… I’ve already moved on… and now that you came back… pain… you still brought pain to me… do you really want to kill me huh…?”




She felt her heart broke… too much stabs he gave for that simple statement… she’s wrong to hope that maybe he loves her again… but no… she just made herself hoped for nothing…she just stayed quiet… her hands fell on to her side… she would jut take everything that he’ll say tonight… thinking that maybe she deserved this from him.




“I’ve grown insane because of you…. Especially when I saw you at Seunghyun’s... still pain… do you know how much it’s breaking my heart whenever I’m seeing you with him…? Whenever I see you smiling at him just like those smiles you gave me back then… whenever I see him taking care of you… whenever I see you feel secured in his arms… I want to run away so that I won’t see those things… but no... whenever I want to do that, I would just find myself rooted on the ground... watching you from afar... it pains me.... because I was supposed to do those things to you Dara…”




He continued…. Her eyes widened in shock once again… she cant decipher what he’s trying to say… but a hint of jealousy could be felt in his words.




“Dara… I can’t take it anymore… whenever I see Sohee all I could feel is guilt… Look what wreck you’ve caused… I want to squeeze you now so hard for I want you to feel the tormenting pain you’ve caused me… no matter what I do… no matter what ing I do to myself…and no matter how I hit my head just to forget about you… this freaking heart won’t let me…”




He loosened his hold to her… grabbed both of her shoulders and let her face him… tears are still running down from his eyes… his words are so hateful… heartbreaking and yet she can’t help but to feel loved by him once again… at first she thought he would just blame her… but with each word he says brings cure to her aching heart… he opened his eyes and looked straight at her… she wanted to look away but he’s eyes were like magnet that she wanted to look at until she gets tired.




“This freaking heart won’t let me Dara…. Why can’t I forget about you….?”




He said again…. His voice sounded like a pleading one… her tears started to form in her eyes…





“No matter how I lie to myself… I really can’t change the fact that… I’m still deeply… dying in love with you… every part of me is screaming your name… you’re still the only girl who could melt me and my heart whenever you’re there… flipped my heart over and over again… the only girl who could torture and could bring cure to my heart at the same time… Dara… I’m still insanely in love with you… that I’m afraid I could kill myself if I continue seeing you from afar with another man…”




half opened …. No words came out from she wanted to say something just something even though she can’t think of anything to say… but nothing came out… a drop of tear escaped from her left eye… everything….




Everything seems like a dream… a drop of tear followed by another one until it gushed out from her eyes wetting down her pale cheeks… she just looked at him… listening to every of his words… he saw her tears and immediately wiped it off… but still it didn’t stop her from pouring it all out… a smile crept on his lips… he knows what he wants now… setting aside everything once again… staking his heart… and grabbing this opportunity…




“Baby… please come back to me…”



And with that.... not thinking twice.... he pulled her closer to him..... their faces only inches apart.... the lips that he missed for three excruciating years.... he closed his eyes once again and landed his lips on her already cold pale lips.