Saturday, 11 October 2014.

Your lower body still hurts from the procedure. You sat on one of the bench at the end of the hallway. Purposely to get way from other people. You can still see a few couples walk in and out from the doctor rooms and the procedure rooms, often with the woman clutching to their stomach and the man holds them with their apologetic expressions. There were several couples that sat in front of the counter at the lounge, waiting anxiously for their turn.

You just aborted your baby.

“Abort it. I don’t want it. It’s not mine.”

You heard his cold voice over and over again.

“How dare you coming back to your family like this, _______ . I don’t have a daughter like you!!”

“But dad, I have this baby with Chansung. You like him, don’t you? You introduced us. You want him to be your son-in-law. Dad, I’m not getting pregnant if it just only me. Chansung played the part, too. He said he love me, dad. Please, dad. Please convince him.”

“I know you will put the blame on me somehow, you ungrateful child. Chansung called me. He said he never did anything to you. And I believe him. He’s not that kind of person. And I know—you, you spoiled brat. I introduced him to you so that he can control you. But I’m mistaken. You’re too wild to control. I can’t believe I have a daughter like you!”

“Dad, please. This is really his baby. I don’t have anyone else beside him, dad. Please, dad!”

You recalled your desperate crying face, kneeling and begging your father for sympathy.

“Chansung is not that kind of person. I know him. Now go. Go away! Leave this house immediately!!!”

You had no other choice but to leave.

“Mianhe, my baby. Mommy loves you so much, mommy have to let you go. I’m so sorry, baby.” You clutched your hands together under your chin, almost like praying gestures.

“I can’t provide you with a proper family, baby. I don’t have one myself. I’m alone now. It’s better for me to face this cruel life alone, rather than I’m sharing all this pain with you. I’m so sorry, my baby. You’ll have a better place up there.” Your tears fell. You sobbed harder at the corner, apparently alone.  

“Oh God, please keep my baby safe and happy besides you up there. I am truly sorry, God.”

You can’t raise this child alone. No matter how much you love your baby, you don’t have the confidence to raise a child alone. You can’t provide the baby with a loving family, with the baby’s father together. Enough of what you had experienced, being raised up without a father’s love and attention. Thinking of what Chansung had did to you ripped your heart for the nth time. You presumed you can depend on him, but you’re wrong. He’s toying with you. He's using you for his own advantages, to get your father liking to be promoted and being assigned for bigger projects in your father’s company.

Your heart hurts so much.

You mourned alone, weeping softly with uncontrolled flow of tears smeared your pale cheeks. You don’t want to move as the pain is still unbearable, and a part of you just don’t want to leave. It felt like you really leave your baby behind if you left this clinic.

“Omma, did you watched me from above, omma? What will happen to me now, omma? Dad hated me. Unnie and hyung doesn’t care. Is this what you’ve been keeping up with, omma? All your life?”

With dad whom only care about his business. With unnie and hyung whom choose to just live their life like dad’s way; doesn’t care about family as long as they achieve their ambition. Money is status. Money is pride. Money is everything. There’s no love and warmth.

“Omma, please help me one last time, Omma. Please take care of my baby up there, Omma. I’ll promise to take care of myself well, down here. Just, take care of my baby up there, Omma. I begged you. Make my baby happy. That’s enough for me, Omma.” You lift your head up and looked to the sky through the window beside you. You smiled in pain and teary eyes.

You wiped your tears away, but they kept falling. You still sobbing alone on the bench. Oblivious to a pair of eyes watching not far from you.

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A woman walked out from a procedure room.

“D-D-Dujun…” she mumbled her word in shock. 

“Yes. It’s me. Dujun.” his voice stern.

“Ww-What are you doing here?”

“I followed you here.” His death stare fixated to her.

“Why…why are you following me?”

“Why not? I can’t follow my girlfriend? Oh, wait. I forgot. Where is he? Where is that bastard? He’s not here with you? How can he leave you alone, baby?” his sarcastic tone filled with hatred.

“Dujun… My dear--”

“Don’t you dare ‘my dear’ me!!” his firm voice roamed through the hallway.

“Dujun, my dear. Listen to me. It’s not like what you think, dear. This is just a mistake. My mistake. He’s innocent.”

“So you’re defending him now, huh? Wae? You love him that much?”

“No, my dear. I love you. Only you. Trust me, Dujun. I love you.”

He let out a cynical chuckle. Clutching his waist with both hands, he turned around in disbelieve. He shook his head, facing upwards and then looked down again. Hurtful grin plastered on his red face. Anger, hatred, disappointment and dreadful feelings seems to be coming at once.

“Don’t make me laugh. You call this love? It only makes me feel stupid and pitiful. I don’t have love like this. A love that let my girlfriend become pregnant with another men!” he glared deeply at her. His eyes starts to fill with clear droplets.

“Dujun, listen to me, please. Please, my dear…” her voice cracked. The fact that the pain is still lingering at her lower body cannot be ignored, but having heartbroken Dujun in front of her makes her more desperate to win him over again.

“I can’t believe myself. I gave you my world, my everything. I trusted you. I kept denying my suspicions towards you, to the point I have a big fight with the boys. They said I’ve become stupid for you. Like, I’ve fallen under a spell. I followed everything that you said, fulfil everything that you wanted. Today-- I finally admit they’re totally right.”  

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“Hyung, you arrived early. Did you have your breakfast? Gikwang-hyung cooked some scrambled eggs for breakfast this morning. But you already out.”Dongwoon approached Dujun in the practice studio, dancing alone.

“It’s ok Dongwoonie. I have a lunch date today. So I have to start practice on my own early. I want to be excused this evening.” He smiled while still dancing.

“Hyung…” the maknae frowned.

“Did she asked you out, to go dating again?”

“Yes. She need to shop for some new clothes. I’m going with her”

Dongwoon’s silence makes Dujun paused his dance routine.

“Wae?”

“Hyung, don’t you think you’re too kind to her? I mean, she can go by herself, right?”

“She’s my girlfriend, Dongwoonie. Of course I have to be good to her. I have to protect her.”

“But hyung, don’t you think this is too much?” maknae’s voice seems cautious, not to hurt his hyung.

“Dongwoonie, don’t worry. I’m not losing my sanity. I’ll still give my best for our comeback, alright?”

“Pfft. Yeah right.” Junhyung said from behind, sound annoyed. He just entered the practice studio and accidentally overheard their conversation.

“Yah, what’s that supposed to mean, Jun?” Dujun stared at him.

“Nothing.” he mumbled, walking passed them towards the mirror wall, not even looking at Dujun. He shook his head, purposely for Dujun to see. His irritating facial expression makes Dujun felt offensive.

Other members entered the studio, preparing for the morning dance practice.

“Junhyung, do you have any problem with me?” Dujun snarled at him.

“I said, nothing.” Junhyung started stretching in front of the mirror wall, with his back facing Dujun and Dongwoon.

“Besides of you being so stupid. ing stupid! Idiot! Babo! Baka!!” he stared at Dujun from the reflection. His anger cannot be contained anymore.

“Yah! Junhyung!!”

“I can’t believe I am under one stupid leader like you. Not even accepting his girlfriend cheated in front of him.” He more. He let out a sarcastic chuckle.

Dujun move forward towards Junyung. His anger explode. He grabbed Junhyung’s shoulder and twisted his body so that they faced each other. He grabbed Junhyung’s collar and pinned him against the mirror. Other members just stood still and watched, unable to interrupt the tensed situation. 

“What did you say? I’m stupid?! And--what did you say about my girlfriend?!” Dujun demand explanation, infuriated by Junhyung remark.

“She’s cheating on you!! She’s seeing another guy and only God knows what they did together!! You’ve seen them. You saw them kissing and hugging each other!! I’m standing beside you at that time, for God sake! Yet you still stick to her. You kept denying the fact. That’s why you’re stupid! ing stupid!!”

Junhyung grabbed Dujun’s hand on his own collar, try to endured his force.

A punch hit Junhyung’s face. At his lower lips, to be precise. Blood coming out from the cut.

Dujun grabbed his collar again. Another punch met Junhyung’s temple. Then Dujun forced him to stand again. Junhyung strike back and surprised Dujun with a punch on his cheek.

“Hyung!!” Dongwoon screamed.

This is getting serious.

Before Hyunseung and Gikwang managed to grab Dujun’s waist and pulled him back, he throw another blow straight to Junhyung’s nose. A loud cracking sound can be heard and Junhyung fall down, grasping his nose with his palm. He stood up again to retaliate, but Yoseop and Dongwoon grabbed his hands and waist.

“Stop, Dujun!! STOP!!” Hyunseung exclaimed.

“Hyung, stop this! Please!! Hyung!!” Dongwoon screamed at Junhyung.

“God! Dujun! Enough!!” Gikwang yelled, still grabbing tight of Dujun’s waist.

“Jun, your nose!!” Yoseob shrieked when he saw blood rushing out of Junhyung’s nose.

“Arghh!” Finally the pain hit him. Junhyung squealed, cupped his nose and lifted his head upwards, try to stop the bleeding.

“Hyung, lay down first. I’ll grab the first aid.” Yoseob help Junhyung to lay down carefully.

Hyunseung, Gikwang and Yoseob stared at Dujun. There’s so much question in their gaze, accumulated with disbelieve.

“How can you do this to your own brother over your girlfriend, Dujun?” Yoseob stood and stared at Dujun. His tone filled with disappointment.

Dujun stared at Junhyung for a while. Then he left the studio.

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“Stupid. I am very stupid.” He brushed his face with his palm.

“Dujun, please. Let’s have a seat. Please, my dear. I’m in pain. Please.” She begged.

“Pain? I feel so much pain right now. Here. Right here! It really hurts me right now I can’t breathe. It is so painful in here!” Dujun hit his chest repeatedly with his fist. His tears fell. He sobbed openly.

“Do you think I’m not? I regretted my actions. I felt remorseful towards you. That’s why I had this abortion. I abort this baby for you, for you for God sake!”

She starts weeping loudly, couldn’t care less about the people surrounding them that watching the scene. She cupped her face with her palms, still sobbing.

“Don’t play with God’s name. I despised a person like that. And God knows, I never asked you to abort the baby for me. I knew you’re pregnant today, right here. How can I ask you to do the abortion earlier? Don't use me as your excuse.” Dujun turned the table. He doesn’t want to take anymore blame from the situation. Enough with all the lies and with him being a fool all this while. He doesn’t have the heart to please anyone anymore.

Dujun’s teary eyes looked at her, as he knows this will be the last.

“Now -- even I love you so much right now, I’m letting you go.” His voice lowered. He looked straight into her eyes. He let the words out without any hesitation. He have made his decision.

“I’m letting you go because -- I don’t want to be stupid anymore.” His tears fell again. Only God knows how heartbroken he is right now.

“No, Dujun. Jebal. Don’t leave me, Dujun.” She continued her pleading.

“No. We are done. Go to your so-called best friend. It is him, right? Gosh, I should’ve known better. Sure, it is him. That bastard.” He clenched his fist tight.

 “Please -- I can’t live without you. Please, don’t leave me…” Her hands reached for his. Small sobbed coming out from her lips. She’s tired and desperate.

Dujun not responding. His cold gaze and tears say it all.

“It’s my mistake, Dujun. Let me make it up to you. Please, forgive me, my dear. Please, don't leave me, Dujun...” her tears fell.

“Hah. How selfish can you be, huh?” He smirked at her.

“You begged me to stay and forgive you, all at once. Oh God. Unbelievable!” He shook his head and roughly brushed her hands away from his.

“You – don’t you feel sorry for your baby?”

She kept silent.

He shook his head.

“Good bye. While I still have my sanity and sympathy, I say this to you -- be happy with your life, and good luck.”

He wiped all the tears that left on his cheeks. He smiled at her one last time, turned around and walked away.

“How can you leave me like this, Yoon Dujun? Just admit you can’t live without me too!” she growled in frustration.

Dujun stopped his stride. But he’s not looking back at her.

“Am I right? I know I’m right. You -- you know I’m right! After all these years we spent together, I know you can’t live without a girl. You aren’t be able to. You can’t stand being alone, Yoon Dujun!” she snarled at him.

“Come back to me, Dujun. We can start over.”

What did she said? I can’t live without a girl? I can’t stand being alone? I admit it’s true. I can’t even eat alone. But -- coming back to her? No! Not ever! It will just prove that she’s right. I wouldn’t let myself be a fool again. Enough is enough! How dare you -- using my weakness as your weapon. I still have my pride up high, you !!*@%#

Dujun gritted his teeth. His anger arisen. At this time his stare hooked on a small, weak body that sat on a bench at the end on the hallway, just a few steps away from where he stood right now.

He turned around to face her. He grinned heartlessly at her.

“Kudos, you know me well enough. I am so proud of you, my ex-girlfriend. True, I can’t live without a girl. But who says I’m alone?”

He turned around walked furiously towards the body that he saw earlier; YOU. He stood right in front of you. He grabbed your hands and pull you up to stand in front of him. You looked at him in shock. He grabbed your shoulders tight, moved your body to face the woman he’s been arguing with, and hold you closer to his side. 

“Meet my girlfriend. Ani, I’ll marry her tomorrow. She’s my wife tomorrow. I’ll never be alone for the rest of my life. So don’t be so worried for me. Keep it to yourself. I don’t need it.”

Eh?

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I woke up this morning and I have this story lingering in my head. [Talk about dreaming and inspiration. hehehe. ;D]

Sorry for my current subscribers and readers. I had to change the story entirely, cause I don't see any plot expansion from the older version. 

This is the new version. I'm quiet confident with this. [Talk about reading tons of fanfics to gain more knowledge and experiencing different style of writing. Yeeha!!]

If you remembered my older version, I'll use all of the plot in the future. But this time I hope it'll turned out good and more exciting to read!! Wish me luck! ='D

I'm still learning, so any suggestions and opinions are most welcomed!

Thank you, and thank you again.

See you soon. Annyeong!!

>> I've corrected this chapter. Put something in and out. Talk about more dramatic scenes. But its just a minor corrections/improvement. mihihi...

Thank you for your comments, my readers and subscribers!! You make me want to improve and write better. I never felt like this for sooooo loooonggg!!! I really appreciate it... ^_^

Sorry for all the unnecessary 'enter' before. It broke the story's flow (Duh. My bad...-_-") I've corrected then anyways.

I hope you all enjoy it more this time!! Thank you, and thank you!!!

XOXORISE_hugs&kisses~