Theme 125
VIXX 300 Theme ChallengeTitle: Insomnia Pairing: HyuKen Related Chapter: none Word Count: 805
Ken frowned as he watched the night sky from the couch in the living room. It was late, very late. So late that it probably counted more as early morning then late at night. He knew that he should be sleeping, but he just couldn’t make his brain shut down long enough to get even a few minutes of rest. It had been this way for about a week and the lack of sleep was starting to affect his ability to perform. The others were starting to get upset and Ken knew it was only a matter of time before one of them yelled at him.
It wasn’t his fault. Not really. He just…….he missed Hyuk. The youngest member was gone and would stay gone for the next two years and he just……couldn’t stand it. He’d been fine for the first month or so, content with Hyuk’s finally words about being back before Ken knew it. But now those words did little to comfort him when he woke up to find the bed empty and cold beside him. Now it didn’t matter how soon Hyuk would be back because every day without him was torture.
The nights without him were worse. During the day, he could at least distract himself with other things. He could get caught up in conversations with Hongbin, waste a few hours helping Ravi with a new song he was working on, or get lost in whatever practice Leo or N had him doing. But at night he had none of that. It was just him alone with his thoughts and the ever present reminder that Hyuk wasn’t with him. And if he went to sleep? Then he was haunted by dreams of his lover floating though his head. He couldn’t take dreaming about holding Hyuk only to wake up alone. It was too much torture.
“Go to sleep,” N sighed, dropping down beside the vocal, “you need it.”
“Can’t sleep,” Ken replied, not looking at the leader.
“Hyuk was like this when you first went away,” N said after a long moment of silence.
“What?” Ken finally turned to look at N, deeply concerned to know that Hyuk had done the same thing he was currently doing. He knew how unhealthy his lack of sleep was and hated the idea of Hyuk doing anything similar.
“He didn’t eat a lot at first either,” N continued, “without you, he kind of shut down for a while.”
“I didn’t know,” Ken frowned, “why didn’t anyone tell me?”
“Hyuk didn’t want you to know,” N explained, “he already felt ashamed about it enough, he didn’t want it to make you upset or guilty or anything.”
“Did he stop?” Ken wondered, trying to recall Hyuk’s appearance by the time he had returned to the younger’s side.
“After a couple of months,” N nodded, “I finally got through to him. He started eating again, then sleeping though the night after a few more weeks. By the time you came home, it was like nothing had happened.”
“That’s good,” Ken smiled, forever grateful to N for helping Hyuk when he couldn’t.
“You know what he made me promise before he left?” N asked, earning a questioning look from the vocalist, “he made me promise not you let you get as bad as him. Actually, he made me promise not to let you even start, but I though a week or mourning would be good for you. But now you’ve had a week, so it’s time for me to step in.”
“I’m still eating,” Ken defended himself, “I’m not going to stop doing that.”
“I know,” N nodded, “but you need to start sleeping. That’s just as important.”
“I can’t,” Ken sighed, returning his gaze to the night sky, “when I sleep, I dream about Hyuk and then I wake up and he’s not there. It hurts too much, only being able to see him or talk to him in my dreams.”
“Hyuk said the same thing,” N replied, “but after a while, he started looking forewords to sleeping because it was the only way he could hold you while you were gone.”
Ken paused, considering the leader’s words. No matter what, it would still hurt to wake up each morning without Hyuk after dreaming of him all night. But wouldn’t it hurt more not to see Hyuk at all? Dream Hyuk might not be as good a real Hyuk, but it was better than nothing.
“I can’t promise I’ll be able to sleep through the night right away,” Ken said.
“I don’t expect that,” N nodded, getting up and holding out a hand to the other, “but I do expect you to try.”
“Thank you, hyung,” Ken smiled, before heading to his room, “for helping me and Hyuk.”
“What are friends for,” N smiled in return.
A/N: it was actually kind of hard thinking up this. but once this idea struck……I couldn’t stop. Hope you all liked it!!
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