Etude of Memory (I)

   "I can't believe i made you stay in that horrible house," Jieun's father muttered as he grabbed Jieun's wrist firmly. As the two rushed down the steep hill, Jieun saw a Lambourgini drive up the porch. Inside, she saw the face of Myungsoo infuriated as he witnessed an unfamiliar man literally dragging Jieun down the steepness with her belongings in his other hands.

 Jieun didn't have to look back to know that Myungsoo was chasing after her, down the steep hill. He cut the hand that gripped her wrist and pulled her to his side. Breathing lightly, he stared into the old man's eyes and demanded an explanation. Squinting his eyes, Jieun's father took a moment to think before he chuckled lightly and gently pulled Jieun back to his side. Jieun looked down, averting eyes with Myungsoo. 

She knew that if she met eyes with Myungsoo, she would break into tears any moment.

"Jieun, is this someone you know?" Myungsoo asked, concern written all over her face. He crinkled his nose, dissatisfied at how Jieun's father looked at him, deluged with fascination. Jieun glued her eyes to the floor and only nodded silently. 

"My Dad.." 

Realizing his mistake, Myungsoo bowed down ninety degrees and apologized redundantly. He eyed Jieun's suitcase in his hand, sensing that something was up. "Are you going somewhere?" Myungsoo asked gingerly as he tried to peek into Jieun's eyes, hoping that it wasn't what he was thinking. For a moment, Jieun was silent. She tried to speak, but how could she possibly tell him that she was going to leave this house, away from him?

"You must be Myungsoo?" Jieun's father pat his shoulder once.

Myungsoo only nodded silently, watching as Mr.Lee rubbed Jieun's shoulder and consoled her. 

"Looks like she's made a tight friendship during her stay," he said emptily. "But i'm afraid that friendship must come to an end. " The sentence silenced Myungsoo. He felt a pang sadness punch his heart, penetrating a hole so deep to the core of his body. He blinked continuously, trying to hold in the tears b up his eyes. He knew what was coming, but he didn't want to believe it.

"Our debts are finally settled, Myungsoo." he paused to take a good look at the boy. "There is no reason for Jieun to stay here anymore." Myungsoo stood there trying to control his heart as he watched Jieun turn her back and slowly walk away from his vision. He watched as her hunched shoulders grew further and further away, taking its place in the shabby furniture removal truck and drove away.

Myungsoo watched as his love left right before his eyes, and he didn't say a thing.

.  .  .

"Time will forget," her father murmured as he drove down the luxurious path that exited the grand house village. "Friends come and go." Her father glanced at her daughter who was lost in thoughts. She smiled faintly and stared out the window, retracing the memory of her first day as they drove past the lamp post. Memories were shading her head in different colors, memories that could never be forgotten.

She looked at her wrist, grinning. 

She slid her hand into her pocket and grabbed a band-aid from the time Myungsoo treated her wrist. The more she pictured his face, the more she felt tears attacking her eyes. She leaned her head back and closed her eyes, trying to eliminate him from her memory. The more she closed her eyes, the more she saw his face vividly lingering in her vision. Regrets were swarming over her mind, about all the things that she wasn't able to do for Myungsoo.

I'm sorry

Those words never left her head.

 The car pulled over infront of their old apartment. Jieun looked up at the small apartment complex, her heart at ease. She guessed this was why they said there was no place like home. Although she grew attached to the big residency at Mr Kim's, there was no place more comfortable than her small apartment. She got out of the car and breathed in the nostalgic scent of her childhood. 

The father and daughter walked into their long-missed house, taking the time to embrace everything. Jieun sat on the same violet sofa that she spent her childhood on. She ran her fingers over the edges of the arms, her heart at ease as she felt the small hole she picked with her tiny fingers as a child. Her father took a seat next to her and the two stared at the family portrait hung opposite them on the wall.

 In the portrait stood three people.

Jieun, Father, and her mother.

"Dad," she asked gingerly, turning her posture toward him. "What happened..?" she stared down at his hand, covered with dry blood. Her father sighed, his eyes resting on the family portrait. She knew her father had it just as hard as her, and it pained her to know that there was nothing that she could really do to help. He locked eyes with Jieun and stared intently into her eyes as if he was looking for something within those beautiful eyes.

 "We still need to unpack some things," her father ignored the question and picked up the stack of boxes near the front door. With a heavy grunt, he lifted the large box and hauled it to his room, leaving things scattered on the ground as they fell from the box. Fragments of olden record players and photographs were strewn on the floor, colliding with each other. Jieun bent down and gathered everything together.

But inbetween the objects laid a small diary that was scented of mildew and newspaper.

She stared down at the diary with her father's name neatly printed on the cover.

Lee Sung-Chan.

Ineptly, she flipped to the first page and began to read what the diary had to reveal.

"June 1st, 1971.."

Chi-Joong-Jin-Dam - Exibition (Kim Dong-Ryul) 

June 1st, 1971

His heart skipped a beat as he saw Jin-Joo walk down the corridor with textbooks edged into her arms. Everybody's eyes were on her as Jin-Joo fluttered her scent of daisy perfume coming from her perfect strands of hair. Each step she made towards Sung-chan made his heart flutter, and his cheeks flush bright red. Jin-Joo snorted as she skipped over to Sung-chan, slapping him on the bicepts. 

"What are you so red for?"

Sung-chan stared into her beautiful eyes, the shape of a half crescent moon.

Because of you

"T..his sweater is too thick! haha.." he laughed awkwardly, his eyes never leaving her beautiful face. He watched as she gracefully tucked her hair behind her right ear. Time seemed to stop whenever he laid his eyes on her, just like the first time he had seen her. Sung-chan had first seen Jin-Joo on the first day of freshmen year at college. He never believed in such a thing as falling in love at first glance. 

But the moment his eyes found Jin-Joo, he knew he had fallen in love.

"I can't believe we are already graduating this year," Jin-Joo said dreamily as the two walked side by side. He felt furious at all the guys checking her out as they walked past. But what made him feel more desperate inside was the fact that Jin-Joo seemed to be not affected at all. Sung-chan sighed and pulled her to the side, sitting at the benches facing the soccer field. 

Sung-chan passed her a can drink, already open with a straw protroding from it. The two sipped their drink silently, watching the soccer players practice their shooting. From midst the crowd, Sung-chan could make out his best-friend Kim Yong-Ju kicking a strong goal. Sung-chan watched as the girls cheered everytime Yong-Ju made a single movement, some even trailing behind him to wipe his sweat and pass him a drink bottle.

 He glanced at Jin-Joo, mesmerized at her side profile.

"I thought you said you were going to join the soccer team," Jin-Joo watched the guys shoot, her eyes fixed on Yong-Ju. "You've been blabbering it for the last four years." She raised an eyebrow as her eyes followed wherever Yong-Ju moved. Sung-chan shrugged, watching Yong-Ju as he kicked another powerful goal. "I actually was admitted into the team," he paused to finish his drink. "But Father's company business training overlaps with practice. Got kicked out after skipping pretty much the whole semester." he shrugged and aimed his can into the bin, missing.

"Your can't aim anyway," Jin-Joo added, shooting her can perfectly into the can. 

'Shut up," Sung-chan sulked. "I can still shoot better than Yong-Ju."

"Yong-Ju?" she asked, curious.

"Yeah," Sung-chan pointed to the good looking player at the back of the line. "Him."

Sung-chan watched discontently as Jin-Joo had her eyes on Yong-Ju the whole time. "How do you know him?" She asked in the most eager tone Sung-chan had heard all year. "We're.. best friends." Sung-chan said, embarrassed to use the term best friend even in college. 

"Yeah? How come i've never seen him before?" 

"I don't know," he retorted. "I mean, how have you never seen him before? He's pretty much the kingka around here." 

Sung-chan stared as the team high-fived each other, packing up. Yong-Ju took off his shirt to reveal his perfectly chiselled abs, changing into his normal clothes. "Sung-Chan!" he called as he rushed over and headlocked him. Yong-Ju ruffled his hair and wiped the sweat off with a handkerchief, blowing air into his bangs. Yong-Ju grabbed hold of himself, noticing Jin-Joo standing opposite him with an entraced face.

"Who..?" Yong-Ju eyed Sung-chan, meeting eyes with the girl.

"Park Jin-Joo," Sung-chan said with a hint of disappointment as he saw the way she looked at Yong-Ju, with such heart. 

"Oh, you're Jin-Joo?" Yong-Ju exclaimed with a flattering smile and stuck out his hand to shake hers. Yong-Ju knudged Sung-chan, a smirk of cheekiness spreading across his face. Yong-Ju was the only one who knew about Sung-chan's unrequited love ever since the start of their university life. Yong-Ju parted his bangs and laughed, ridiculed at how shy Sung-chan was infront of Jin-Joo.

"I've heard alot about you," Yong-Ju scanned Jin-Joo up and down. 

An awkward silence wrapped over them like an itchy wool blanket. 

"Since this is a coincidence, why don't we become friends?" Yong-Ju suggested and laughed innocently, scratching his head. Sung-chan eyed Jin-Joo from the corner of his eyes, his heart feeling like it had been shattered to a million pieces as he noticed the way she glanced at Yong-Ju. In his four years of college life, Jin-Joo had never looked at Sung-chan that way.

"Sure," was the reply that came out of Jin-Joo's mouth.

"She's pretty hot," Yong-Ju punched Sung-chan as the two walked side by side. "So that's the girl you've been talking about all four years, hm?" he snickered and ducked the shove that Sung-chan fired. There was no reason to be, but Sung-chan didn't feel at all content. There was a reason why he had kept Jin-Joo away from Yong-Ju all these years, because he was afraid of the one thing that might come true.

"Yong-Ju," Sung-chan asked as the two exited the school gate and entered the streets of Daehakro. "We wouldn't.. ever like the same girl. Right..?"

Yong-Ju broke into a hysterical laugh and punched Sung-chan's head. "No way. My taste is the volumptious noonas. you know?  full chest and bouncy-" "Okay i get it." Sung-chan slapped his mouth shut, embarrassed that somebody might have heard it. The streets of Dae-hak ro was becoming more crowded, half of it filled with couples and single girls who sent luscious glances toward Yong-Ju as they walked past.

"Did you think that i would snatch Jin-Joo away from you?" Yong-Ju retreated back to his relaxed tone.

Sung-chan was silent. He was embarrassed to admit it, but it was true.

"I've got a million girls chasing my back, and the majority are prettier than her." 

"Jin-Joo could be one of them.." Sung-chan complained diffidently. Yong-Ju glared at his best friend, stifled. He knew that Sung-chan was always a coward with girls, but he hated it more when he always assumed that the girl was interested in Yong-Ju himself, instead of Sung-chan. Sung-chan was completely capable of being confident, but Yong-Ju hated the fact that he was wasting his opportunity.

"I'll help you," Yong-Ju nodded. "I'll help you get her."

"Really?" a shot of ecstatic excitement grew on his body. 

"Yeah. It's about time you actually made a move, instead of just stalking like a creeptard, like you did for the past twenty four years." Yong-Ju rolled his eyes as he picked up a complimentary snack from the snack vendors and snuffed it into his mouth.

"You really don't have any interest in her, right?" Sung-chan grabbed his shoulders. 

"Have you been lied to your whole life? No!" 

"You can't just change your mind later. Okay?"

"Okay."

--

 "Jin-Joo..?" Jieun contemplated. She had heard that name somewhere, but she couldn't quite make out whose name it was. 

Long time no see, Jin-Joo.

 How could you do this to me Kim Yong-Ju?

Jieun remembered.

She remembered the names her father spat in the study. She slipped the diary behind her back as her father came out of the room to grab more boxes. As she looked into her father's eyes, a million thoughts were running through her head. How could her father possibly be related in any of this? She always remembered her father telling her about how her mother was his first love.

"You look like you've just seen a ghost." her father chuckled as he picked up another box and disappeared through his room.

"Dad..? With Mrs.Kim..?" 

She whispered unbelievably.

She snuck into her room, taking her official seat on the desk as she read the next page of the diary.

From Left to Right: Kim Yong-Ju, Park Jin-Joo, and Lee Sung-chan (Bottom).

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