Luhan closed his door and was now heading to school when he heard a familiar voice.

"Hi."

"Oh! Hey Sehun.." He looked down, still not used of Sehun giving him attention.

"Going to school right? Let’s go then."

"O-oh yes!"

They walked next to each other, Sehun hands in pockets and Luhan head down. The silence wasn’t awkward but still, Luhan couldn’t bear it so he asked, “You live somewhere around here?”

"Yes, here to be exact." Sehun pointed a white building across the park.

Luhan gasped. “You live just next to me!”

"Oh yeah? Well, we can go and come back from school together then." He flashed Luhan a bright smile.

Too bright.

Too too bright.

Remove your eyes Luhan, look away!

Oh and reply!!

"Ah, y-yes, o-of course!"

Sehun’s smile grew bigger. “Do you stutter that often?”

"N-n-n-no."

Oh. My. God.

Let’s welcome back the sweety palms, quick heart beating and unavoidable red cheeks.

Sehun chuckled, and even while having a mental breakdown, Luhan was telling himself he loved that sound. So this is what heaven sounds like...

"It’s fine, I don’t mind. It’s cute actually."

Luhan suddenly felt dizzy.

"Hey Luhan!" It was Baekhyun. Luhan didn’t notice they were already at school.

"Oh!" Baekhyun exclaimed when he spotted Sehun next to him. "Coming to school with your boyfriend, I see."

"Baek!!"

"Well I’ll go first, see you in class!"

Luhan was shaking, he turned to Sehun. “D-don’t listen to him! Never!”

"Really? I was considering what he told me last day." They were walking to their class.

Luhan took a few seconds before asking, “And what did he say?” Fear taking over.

Sehun faced him and Luhan gulped. Sehun was taking too long to reply making him more than scared now.

Oh no... what did he said again, I’ll kill you Bae–

"Do you want to hang out tomorrow?"

...

What?

"Yeah of course.."

...

What. did. Sehun. just. asked.? A date?! No, not really, but basically that’s what it was.

Basically.

Luhan grinned. He wanted to scream, and jump everywhere. Was it really happening?! Sehun, Oh Sehun, asking him out, well, that’s not really what he said but... whatever. He wanted to tell the world, he wanted to shed tears of joy, he wanted to–

"Class will start, if you could sit down now, Luhan.."

The voice of the teacher brought Luhan back to reality. He saw all his classmates looking at him weirdly. He hadn’t move from the door. He felt not just his cheeks, but his whole body burning.

"I– sorry!" He bowed and immediatly sat down. Some students laughed but Luhan didn’t mind, he was only thinking about the smile Sehun was giving him.

"I’m so done! What am I gonna do? Why did I accept?!" Luhan fell on his bed. Baekhyun laughed and sat next to him.

"Why are you like this? You’ll just hang out with him."

Luhan sat up. “I’ll just hang out with him?! But tell me who is “him”?! Sehun! And who is Sehun?! The boy I’m in love with I don’t even know why and I’ll spend the day with him in less than seventeen hours but as you can see I’m perfectly fine!”

"Wooah, calm down!" Baekhyun patted the back of the frightened deer pulling his hair out. "Just act like everytime, Sehun will just fall for you more."

More? Luhan shook his head.

"You don’t believe me? Why did he ask then?"

"...Because he pities me…"

Baekhyun laughed, a lot, but when he saw Luhan serious face he stopped. “And why would he?”

"I don’t know! Maybe because of all those times I embarassed myself in front of him or maybe because you threatened him, I don’t know!" He puffed his cheeks.

Trying not to laugh at the last thing Luhan said, Baekhyun hugged him. “Awwww you’re so cute! But believe me!” He pulled away and looked right into Luhan’s eyes. “He’ll fall in love with you. Promise.”

Luhan wanted to trust him, he really wanted to, but he was not one to have a lot of friends. He was often laughed at when he was a kid, people mocked him a lot during a long time. But it stopped in High school.

When he met Baekhyun.

His best friend healed most of his insecurities, but, someone loving him... It seemed so weird, so,

Impossible.

He hugged Baekhyun back and closed his eyes. Thinking about his promise again and again. He wanted to believe it but only one thought came back in the end.

Doubt.

After deciding what to wear, Luhan was now standing in front of his mirror, frowning.

This is too simple... He even thought about buying a suit to be at Sehun’s “level”, but it was too late when he heard the door.

"H-hi."

"Hey, Luhan."

Luhan tried to get used to his name being said by Sehun, but, yeah he had to try harder to not blush. And the way Sehun looked right now wasn’t helping. Casual clothes plus hair up was definitly not a good combination for Luhan’s heart. He cleared his throat. “Um, so let’s go?”

Sehun nodded and they walked to a little restaurant near the area. There weren’t a lot of customers so they sat at a little table at the back, accross from each other.

The waiter, probably their age, took their order. Luhan remarked how he kept his eyes on Sehun but ignored it. It was when he came back with the food that he couldn’t take it. He was smiling widely at Sehun and even gave him a free drink. Luhan wanted to kill him, Sehun invited him, not that guy!

"Luhan?" he looked up to see Sehun confused expression, and the guy had a slightly annoyed expression. The feeling is shared..

“Yes?”

"I called you a few times, are you okay?"

No I’m not. "Yes." There was bitterness in his voice because the boy was still next to Sehun.

Can you move?! What is he even doing here? Your job is done, you can go!

"Luha–"

"I’m fine!" He stabbed on his food and started eating.

"Well, see you." The boy smiled at Sehun. Luhan wanted nothing but slap him. Hard.

When he finally left, Sehun spoke up,

"Are you not feeling well?"

Luhan sighed. “I’m fine Sehun, really,” I don’t even know why I’m angry.. “I’m just.. tired.”

"…Oh.. well, I’ll go home with you after we’re done eating.." Sehun said with a small smile.

Luhan wanted to tell him no, but he really wasn’t feeling well. He knew he was going to ruin the rest of the day so he didn’t say anything.

He looked a few times at Sehun, who was chewing slowly, head down. Is he... upset...?

Silence engulfed them. After what felt like forever, they finally finished their meal.

"If you’re done, we can go." Luhan nodded. As they were heading to the door, he was about to tell Sehun he was fine now, that they could go to the next place when the boy showed up.

"Hey! You’re leaving?"

They turned around and Sehun smiled, nodding, he thanked him again for the drink.

"It’s nothing really! Oh! and I don’t even know your name."

Sehun seemed hesitant but replied nevertheless, “Sehun.”

"I’m Taehyun, hope to see you again soon, Sehun!"

After that, they got out. Sehun was about to say something but Luhan was faster.

“Can we go now?”

Sehun probably wanted to ask what was wrong again but deciding otherwise, he nodded. “Let’s go.”

The walk home was weird. Luhan sensed Sehun glancing at him sometimes, but he didn’t care. He felt just, angry. He was thinking about a lot of things, like, how did he even thought or dream to be Sehun’s boyfriend. He’d be nothing but a burden. He should make him happy and smile, but he was the reason Sehun was worried right now.

It was Sehun who asked him to go out and because of a jealousy nonsense, he stopped all of Sehun’s plans for the day. He wanted this day to be perfect, but it was him who wasted it. He wanted to apologize, but for what exactly? For being stupid? But he should so he took a deep breath before turning to Sehun.

"Sehun.. I’m sor–" He realized Sehun wasn’t next to him

"Sehun?"

He was a few meters behind, squatted in the park looking at something. Luhan went to him and sat next to him. When Sehun felt his presence, he quickly faced him.

"Luhan? What are you doing here?" Seeing Luhan puzzled face he continued, "I told you I needed to check something but, you kept on walking so… I thought you were mad, I didn’t insist.."

Luhan's eyes widened. “I’m not! I’m sorry I was just... thinking.”

It was the first time for Luhan to see Sehun like that. He felt really bad to be the reason behind Sehun’s sadness.

I do everything wrongly... even being your friend is a burden… He shook his thoughts away, trying to change the conversation he asked, “Do you like this rose that much?”

He wished he could make Sehun smile like that flower never failed to.

"Yeah... It’s my mother’s rose."

Luhan blinked. "…What?"

Sehun looked unsure, "…My mother had a garden full of roses, she loved it and took care of them everyday. …I was glad she was smiling again, she suffered a lot after my dad death." Sehun tried to hide the pain on his face, but Luhan heard it. "It was like a recovery for her, it distracted her mind.. A year later, we found out she was sick…" Luhan heard how his voice decreased at the end.

"But she stayed strong and lived like nothing was wrong until.. she died three weeks later.. I took care of the garden until I received a letter from the school here, that I was accepted. I couldn’t refuse of course, even if I was going to leave the roses behind. It’s a better school than my old one and they’re helping me pay the apartment. I took one rose as a symbol, and planted it here, promising myself that I’ll take care of it."

Luhan’s mouth was hang open at the whole story, tears in his eyes. “W-what about the other roses?”

"…It’s been weeks, they’re probably dead now.."

Luhan hated seeing Sehun like that. How could he fake a smile when he suffered and continue to suffer so much? How could he hide his pain like this? He’s constantly hiding his emotions and stay strong to not worry the persons around him. And Luhan? He was someone ready to make the person he loved feel bad without telling him anything, just because he was jealous. So selfish…

He wanted to cry and apologize to Sehun for not being a good person, a good friend. He ended up hugging him tightly. He wanted to take Sehun’s grief, take it all if it was possible. Someone like Sehun didn’t deserve to go throught all this.

Luhan didn’t like how Sehun keeps all his feelings inside, but he closed his eyes tight to not let his tears fall.

Some things are better left inside…

Sehun slowly put his arms around him, hugging him back. If Luhan face wasn’t burrowed on Sehun’s shoulder, maybe he would have seen the real smile that made his way on Sehun’s face…