“There are many who don't wish to sleep for fear of nightmares. Sadly, there are many who don't wish to wake for the same fear.” ― Richelle E. Goodrich, Dandelions: The Disappearance of Annabelle Fancher.

The wind was howling and the trees threatened to bend and break because of the wind. The air smelt of rain and yet there was none. The sky was dark grey, almost black even though it was only five thirty on an early autumn evening. Dust was bellowing everywhere, blinding any idiot stupid enough to step out of safe territory. The whirring of the fans seemed unnaturally loud, the sound was accompanied by the faint sound of retreating thunder and yet the world was still hot, humid and stifling. The weather was behaving crazily and no one knew exactly why. Miniature leaves flew in through open windows after being detached from their parent tree. One of these leaves flew through a window and landed on a face. The person flinched and opened their eyes. Grunting he brushed the leaf out of his face. He lay there for a bit, staring at the ceiling and watching a spider wrap up an insect it had caught in its web. Finally he sat up, swinging his feet off the bed and sitting there. He got up and gently padded towards a slightly open door where there was a slit of bright light. He pushed the bathroom door open and entered. He looked at his reflection in the mirror and winced. As time went by, the worse it got.

Smudged eyeliner, eyes red, ugly tear tracks, brownish red hair in disarray, his mouth was almost blue, bite marks on his jaw and ears, his neck covered in ugly red and purple ones that were puffy and definitely looked like they had bled, his torso covered in similar marks, his hips were bruised and the skin looked like it was crying for mercy, his thighs were in no better condition. His entire body ached and he had to resist the urge to collapse on the floor. He closed his eyes and steadied his breathing. Slowly he started to move towards the shower. He the shower and very gently washed himself, whimpering in pain every now and then. He got dressed and then walked out of the bathroom. He gathered his clothes which were scattered around the room.

“Baekhyun,” a deep voice from the direction of the bed called. Baekhyun tensed, freezing for only a fraction of a second before returning to his normal pace of cleaning his things, afraid he wouldn’t be able to walk out if he saw what he left on the bed.

He picked up his bag.

Arms s around his waist and he felt a body press against his back.

“Going somewhere?” the person breathed against the back of his neck, leaving Baekhyun covered in goosebumps.

“I-I have work.” Baekhyun stuttered. “The orders for tomorrow aren’t ready.”

“Must you?” the voice asked again. “Stay.” It was not a request.

“I really have to go.” Baekhyun was trembling now.

“Fine then. But I expect you back here tomorrow,” He said.

“I’ll come.” Said Baekhyun. “I’ll go now?”

Baekhyun wanted to stay though. He didn’t want to leave. The embrace was hot and cold. He craved the heat, the warmth, the pleasure. He was terrified of the indifference, the pain, the hunger. He wanted to stay and he wanted to run away, far away and never return. But he couldn’t, he was too addicted already and he couldn’t escape, ever.

The arms let go of Baekhyun and he fled before he could change his mind. He fled out the door, down the steps, across the lawn, down the dirt road into civilization again. He knew he’d have to make it to his apartment fast otherwise he’d be stuck with everyone watching him because his neck, jaw and ears made him look like a friggin . Baekhyun ran, head down, turning up the collar of his jacket to at least cover something.

He made it to his apartment complex and ran up the rarely used staircase so that old gossipy women wouldn’t see him. He arrived at his door and punched the code in and slipped inside, slamming the door shut. Baekhyun leaned against the door, his heart pounding.

It was overdone. There were rarely this many visible marks.

Baekhyun sank to the ground; he wrapped his arms around his knees and cried. He never let anyone see him cry, except for him. Baekhyun was strong, he was strong, he was strong. Not.

His phone rang and he blindly picked it up.

“Yeobosayo?” he asked.

“Yah! Byun Baekhyun! Where the hell are you? Are you aware we have a big order tomorrow? Get over here now!” A shrill voice ordered.

Baekhyun grimaced.

“Got that Luhan. You can stop yelling into my phone. There is a fifty seven percent chance that I may go deaf.” Baekhyun graciously informed his boss and friend.

“Great. See you in five.”

The call cut.

Baekhyun didn’t take long in finding a decent scarf that worked well in covering things up. It suited the weather too. He got out of his apartment and instantly choked on the cigarette smoke of a passing by neighbor. Muttering muffled curses into his scarf Baekhyun arrived at ‘Goût Café’. He pushed the door open even though the sign read ‘closed’. Luhan was brewing a cappuccino.

“Lord, you did not!” said Luhan in horror.

Baekhyun sighed and went into the kitchen, tying an apron around his waist with Luhan following him.

“I thought the both of you had a 'no visible marks' agreement!” said Luhan.

“We did.” Baekhyun acknowledged. “But I guess it’s not valid anymore.”

“Baekhyun, this is crazy ! Why do you even go for it?” asked Luhan.

“Because I have no other choice.” Baekhyun said. He started to mix the sugar and butter.

“The guy abuses you Baekhyun!”

“He loves me. OK?” Baekhyun asked pointedly. But he sounded bitter. It hurt, it hurt just to say that. “I don’t even deserve his love.”

“He doesn’t deserve you, Chanyeol does.” Luhan spun on his heel and walked out of the kitchen.

Baekhyun stood frozen there and then sank to the ground choking on his tears.

As time went by it was getting harder and harder for him. He could barely live anymore.

------o------

Conflicted feelings. Baekhyun wanted to pour everything out on his best friend but at the same time he couldn’t.

“You’re weird.” Kris commented as he sipped his Americano.

“What do you mean?” Baekhyun asked.

“I never really thought you were into S&M, but I guess I was wrong,” said Kris.

“I’m afraid if someone mentions these marks on me again I will kill them and hang their heads on my wall.” Baekhyun gritted his teeth.

“Do you know where he is?” asked Kris.

“Who?” Baekhyun questioned.

He was busy working on ‘Menu of the Day’ for the next day. It was six in the afternoon. The shop was already closed but a few selected people could come in. Luhan was cleaning up the rest room and they could hear him cursing in Mandarin.

“The guy who you and then murdered Yongguk,” said Kris.

Baekhyun tensed.

“Kris...”

“I know, I’m sorry. It’s only been three years. That was dumb of me. I was supposed to ask in January, idiot. I’m sorry Baekhyun, we’re just really trying to find the guy,” said Kris.

Baekhyun stared down at the white board.

Silence.

In the background was Mandarin curse words.

“Baek, I’m so sorry,” said Kris.

“It’s fine.”

The bell above the door rang. Both Kris and Baekhyun turned.

A smile lit up Baekhyun’s face.

“Hey Chanyeol,” said Kris.

“Hey Kris, Hey Baekkie” Chanyeol greeted them with a goofy smile, ears making him looking cuter.

Chanyeol was tall, well built with big eyes, short black hair and an infectious smile.

“Hi!” Baekhyun squeaked out.

“Two-timer.” Kris muttered under his breath.  

Baekhyun kicked his best friend under the table.

“Are you done with work?” Chanyeol asked Baekhyun.

Baekhyun nodded, his face as bright as the sun which had currently decided to hide behind dark, angry clouds. What was with the weather anyways?  The wind was whipping around, leaves were flying, and there was an occasional flying poster or hat.

“Baek, your neck...” the light in Chanyeol’s eyes dimmed.

Baekhyun’s smile faltered.

“It’s OK.” Baekhyun said, waving his hand.

“Little hypocrite.” Kris muttered again. “You’re supposed to kill him and hang his head on your wall.”

“You want to go out?” Chanyeol asked, smiling as brightly as he could.

“Sure,” said Baekhyun.

“I’ll be leaving then,” said Kris. “I don’t want to get stuck with serial killer, swearing blonde, scary as hell Chinese.”

“See ya Laxy hyung.” Baekhyun grinned brightly.

“Little moron,” Kris muttered.

Kris got into his car and watched as Chanyeol took Baekhyun’s hand and led him out of the cafe. Chanyeol was a nice and sweet kid and Baekhyun was just mean to him. Chanyeol saved Baekhyun and Baekhyun just pushed the kid to the side. Kris still remembers when he first met Chanyeol.

Flashback

Kris pulled his jacket closer to himself as he continued looking around for anything fishy. After getting the anonymous call from someone about a about to happen in the neighbourhood, the police sent undercover agents to the site. Kris couldn’t help but feel like they were actually late.

Suddenly he heard fast footsteps and a whimper.

“Help! Please someone help!” He heard a baritone voice cry.

Kris took off into the direction of the voice.

The next moment he saw a figure almost as tall as him. The figure ran into the light. There were tear marks on his face and he was as pale as a sheet. In his arms was a person. The person’s eyes were closed, face dirty, bruised and nails dripping blood. The boys frame was covered only by a large jacket Kris suspected belonged to the taller male. The face lolled slightly towards him.

Kris felt sick.

Baekhyun, his best friend.

“Baek!” he cried, running forwards.

“Help, please!” cried the taller male.

Kris tried to pull Baekhyun into his arms and the taller male clung to Baekhyun looking at Kris with fear in his eyes.

“It’s OK, I’m a police officer, he’s my best friend,” said Kris. The male slowly let go of Baekhyun. “He’s still beathing.” Kris sighed in relief. “Can you call the ambulance?” Kris asked the male.

“I-I don’t h-have a pho-phone.” The other male trembled.

Kris nodded and yanked out his phone and called the ambulance.

The tall male has sunk to the ground crying, his hands were covered in blood.

“What happened?” Kris asked him.

“I don’t know, I don’t know,” the male cried.

Flashback Ends

Later on the male, which was Chanyeol was confirmed innocent by Baekhyun. Chanyeol and Bekhyun were biology class partners and Chanyeol had arrived to find Baekhyun and a dead man. Chanyeol picked up Baekhyun and started crying for help as Baekhyun passed out. Anyone could tell Chanyeol was crazy in love with Baekhyun. Chanyeol suffered from severe trauma and forgot the incident.

Chanyeol had confessed to Baekhyun but Baekhyun couldn’t break away from the shady guy he had some relationship with. At first Chanyeol couldn’t understand it. Baekhyun seemed to hate it too but he couldn’t leave the shady guy. So Chanyeol and Baekhyun managed some kind of strange relationship. Kris couldn’t understand when his best friend became such a strange guy.

------o------

Baekhyun felt Chanyeol interlace their fingers and he smiled happily. Even if the sky was foreboding the other gave off natural and happy warmth. Chanyeol played with his thumb. Baekhyun closed his eyes and let Chanyeol lead him, the cold, biting wind snapping against his cheeks. It didn’t matter though, Chanyeol was warm so Baekhyun was just fine. If Baekhyun could stay like this forever, holding Chanyeol’s hand, walking with him and just enjoying each other’s presence, he’d do it, do it and never ever stop.

Baekhyun felt himself being tugged and then he was sitting on a bench. He looked up at Chanyeol quizzically. Chanyeol gave him a reassuring smile.

“Give me a moment, I’ll be back,” said Chanyeol. He turned and ran off. Puzzled, Baekhyun sat there, arms crossed over his chest to fend off the cold. He closed his eyes, feeling the exhaustion of the past few weeks catch up with him. The next moment Baekhyun was asleep.

------o------

Baekhyun shivered as he hugged himself. The street was dark and everything gave off an evil aura. He didn’t want to be there but he had to make it to Chanyeol’s house fast before Chanyeol got the phone call. Why did Chanyeol live in such a shady neighbourhood? Maybe it was because he could barely afford to go to school with his sick mother to take care of. Which direction was Chanyeol’s house again?

Left here, he thought.

He turned left and continued following the small white stripes on the road. He froze. Footsteps. Baekhyun swore he heard footsteps that stopped the moment he stopped. Was he being followed? Goosebumps crawled up his arms. He continued walking, his heart pounding in his chest. A stone clattered towards his right. He flinched and then took off, running blindly. A hand grabbed his arm and he was spun around.

“Hello Princess,” a deep voice said.

Baekhyun felt his skin crawl at the voice. He yanked himself away and ran.

“Chanyeol! Chanyeol!”

Impact.

Baekhyun’s head met the narrow asphalt road and he felt the dull taste of iron in his mouth. He heard a door slam and a woman screaming at her husband to call the police. He was pinned down to the ground no matter how hard he struggled.

“Chanyeol!”

------o------

Wet.

 Baekhyun jerked and opened his eyes.

“Hold still,” said Chanyeol’s warm voice. Baekhyun realized the wet substance was actually quite soothing to his irritated skin. Chanyeol was dabbing a swab of cotton against his neck. Baekhyun realized he was taking care of his...hickeys. Baekhyun wanted to puke. Baekhyun wanted to die. He wanted to throw himself off Namsan Tower and crack his head open on the pavement below. Chanyeol was doing the unthinkable, the unimaginable, the incomprehensible. Did Chanyeol really care about him so much that he was willing to tend to marks he hadn’t made, knowing full well there would be more soon? The guilt was killing Baekhyun and he couldn’t even do anything about it. He wanted it to stop. It was too much. Baekhyun wanted it to stop forever. But if it did he would rip his heart apart and Chanyeol’s and he would rather be burned alive than hurt Chanyeol.

“Chanyeol please...you don’t have too...” Baekhyun whispered.

“It’ll definitely make me feel better.” Chanyeol merely stated, concentrating on the cotton. Chanyeol’s lips were pressed together and he was staring intently at the marks on Baekhyun’s neck. Baekhyun disliked the attention that Chanyeol was giving in the wrong place. Baekhyun wished he could go back and change everything. There was a time Baekhyun loved the way people looked at his almost flawless skin. Now the admiration had turned to something that closely related to disgust and it burnt, especially when people suspected Chanyeol was the reason for the marks.

Baekhyun hated himself and it was difficult to let Chanyeol love him when he hated himself so.

“Chanyeol...stop...let’s just go buy a scarf, OK?” Baekhyun asked.

Chanyeol looked at Baekhyun dead in the eyes.

“I’ll do this and then we can go get a scarf.” He said.

Baekhyun sat there, throat constricting, heart hurting and head throbbing as Chanyeol continued on.

“There, now I’m done. Let’s go get a scarf,” said Chanyeol looking at Baekhyun.

Baekhyun nodded.

Both of them walked into a nearby shop and bought a blue scarf for Baekhyun. Baekhyun wrapped it around his neck and both of them walked out of the shop. Baekhyun studied the sky, with half shut eyes. It would snow soon. Chanyeol tugged Baekhyun along with him. They both arrived at a Ramyun stand and sat down. Chanyeol ordered the Ramyun and it was served.

“Eat up,” said Chanyeol. “You’ve gotten skinnier.”

Baekhyun nodded and picked up the chopsticks. Chanyeol always said that. Chanyeol had just seen him on Friday and they talked on both Saturday and Sunday. Chanyeol worried himself over Baekhyun and Baekhyun felt so guilty.

“Do you want to go shopping after this?” Chanyeol asked. “You’ve been wearing that blue shirt for such a long time,” said Chanyeol.

Baekhyun smiled.

“Let’s go,” he smiled.

After eating Ramyun Baekhyun was led off by Chanyeol to a shopping mall.

Both of them were going through the clothes when someone walked over to them. Both of them turned to look at the unfamiliar male in confusion.

“Baekhyun and Chanyeol right?” asked the male. He let out a laugh as soon as they nodded. “You both haven’t changed at all!” he said. “Don’t you guys remember me?” he asked.

Both of them shook their heads.

“I’m Jongdae! Kim Jongdae! The kid that used to sit behind the two of you in Biology class!” said Jongdae. Both pairs of eyes widened in surprise.

“Jongdae, you’ve changed!” said Chanyeol.

“Man the last time I saw the both of you was in Mr. Bang’s Biology class and Mr. Bang was trying to rap!” laughed Jongdae. Baekhyun’s smile faded. “Mr. Bang had such a deep voice. Remember how all the girls used to drool over him?” Jongdae asked. Chanyeol nodded but Baekhyun weakly smiled. “Looks like both of you did end up dating,” said Jongdae.

Chanyeol smiled brightly and took Baekhyun’s hand. Baekhyun tried to smile as brightly as possible.

“You look a little sick Baek, are you OK?” asked Jongdae.

“I’m fine,” Baekhyun managed. “Just a cold,” Baekhyun lied.

“Oh,” said Jongdae.

“Jongdae, hurry up will you?” a familiar angelic voice called. It was then Baekhyun realized there was a ring on Jongdae’s ring finger and the other male’s ring finger.

“You married the school secretary?” Baekhyun cried.

Chanyeol hurriedly bowed as their angel secretary walked over. Kim Joonmyeon.

“Chanyeol, Baekhyun!” said Joonmyeon in surprise. His eyes landed on Baekhyun. Being the secretary he had had a vague knowledge of what had happened to Baekhyun. “How are you Baekhyun?” he asked.

“Good sir,” said Baekhyun.

“Call me Joonmyeon,” said Joonmyeon with a smile. He turned to Jongdae. “Come on, we have to go, your sister is calling me like a mad hatter because your phone is turned off. Did you forget to charge it?” Joonmyeon dragged Jongdae away.

“Who would’ve thought,” laughed Chanyeol turning to him. “Baek?” he asked in concern. “Are you OK?”

“I’m fine Chanyeol, let’s just get out of here.”

Both of them went to Baekhyun’s apartment. Chanyeol sat on Baekhyun’s bed with him as both of them played Monopoly.

“Baekhyun, do you love me?” Chanyeol asked softly.

Baekhyun looked at Chanyeol surprised.

“Of course I do!” said Baekhyun fiercely.

“But you have him,” said Chanyeol weakly.

Baekhyun crawled over to Chanyeol. He bit his lip, guilt clawing at him, trying to drown him in a pool of his own sins. Baekhyun pulled himself onto Chanyeol’s lap and curled up there, his ear against Chanyeol’s chest as he listened to Chanyeol’s heartbeat.

“I love you and only you, never doubt that,” said Baekhyun. His guilt was screaming, mocking him. He wanted to die, bash his head in.

Chanyeol kissed the top of his head. After having dinner Chanyeol left and then when the lights in the apartment complex turned off Baekhyun snuck out.

------o------

“Baekhyun, go take out the trash!” his mother shouted.

“Yes mom!” called Baekhyun. He ran down, taking the trash from each room. He went to the kitchen last. He picked up the trash bag. His eyes wandered to the dark window and he felt suddenly cold. He felt like someone was watching him. “Mom,” Baekhyun whispered. “Can I take out the trash tomorrow morning?” asked Baekhyun.

“Tomorrow morning? What rubbish! Take out the trash now! I can’t cook dinner next to a full trash bag. If you don’t take it out there will be no dinner!”

“Yes mom,” Baekhyun whispered weakly.

“Where is that man? He says he works so much, but doesn’t he want to come home?” he heard his mother mutter.

Baekhyun walked out. The couple next door were having a screaming match.

It was dark and he felt the hairs on his neck rise.

Baekhyun looked around.

Suddenly it was silent. Very silent. So silent it unnerved Baekhyun. He hauled the trash bags along with him to the dumpster. He pushed the bags in and then began briskly walking home. He was on edge. Every tiny sound made him jump.

“Baekhyun,” he heard a low voice whisper. Baekhyun took off and ran into the house, slamming the door shut.

“Byun Baekhyun! What have I told you about slamming doors?” he heard his mother screech.

His father came home and they had a quiet dinner. Baekhyun’s parents went to sleep easily. They didn’t feel like someone was watching the house. Baekhyun stood up and went to the window, fingers trembling he swept back the curtains.

Darkness.

Baekhyun felt Goosebumps on his arms.

It was dark but someone or something was out there.

With trembling fingers Baekhyun reached for his flashlight, aimed it at the street below and turned it on.

A man wearing a hood stood there, the only thing that Baekhyun could see of his face was a curved smile, directed exactly at him.

Baekhyun screamed.

------o------

Baekhyun sat up, panting. He was sweating. The arm around his waist tightened.

“Go back to sleep,” the deep voice said.

Baekhyun sank back onto the bed, trembling.

------o------

A/N - Now I will leave you there my dear subscribers. More is to come. Updates will be slow, I'm really busy. Commenting will really boost me up. Please comment and subscribe!

        Kaeppsong~