Hello, my name is Luhan. I can’t come to the phone now, leave a message after the beep!

BEEP

To Luhan:

Oh my goodness I saw the news! I am so sorry! Are you okay? Please call me!

To Luhan:

How could he just run away like that?! What is going on?!?!? Call me!!!

To Luhan:

Baekhyun is leaving?!?!? Please tell me that is not true! Please tell me that!!

To Luhan:

I’m so sorry! I hope you’re okay! Stay strong my friend!

To Luhan:

That bastard. How could he do that to you?! When I find him I’ll kill him! You don’t need him, you’re so much better off.

To Luhan:

I hate you. Why didn’t you stop him?

Comment #145

I can’t believe this is happening! What is our world turning into?!

Comment#278

I knew this would happen. Things are too good to be true.

Comment #356

Let’s see how successful they will be after this.

Comment#788

Will you es just shut up about Baekhyun?! My oppa definitely has a reason to do this! He is not an idiot! Just leave him alone!

Comment #899

Baekhyun filed for the lawsuit, citing health and monetary issues as the main reason for his lawsuit. This is not the first time Starling has abused their artists. #justiceforbaekhyun2k14

Comment #1100

So…this is the end of BxL?

Comment#1233

I don’t even like them, but I’m curious to see how this turns out.

Comment #3566

you Starling.

Comment #3567

I’m worried for Luhan. Is he okay?

               One of the world’s biggest lies comes in the form of 3 words: I am fine. You say it when you are sick, you say it when you’re upset and you say it even when everything is clearly not fine.

                For years, Luhan has learnt to say that everything is fine. He has said it so many times that even his own heart believed it. It was embedded in his subconscious, like a broken record on replay. “I’m fine, I’m fine, I’m fine…”

                But there are some things that will never be fine. Baekhyun’s disappearance is that very thing. After being found in the elevator, sobbing his eyes away by Sehun, he was taken back to his apartment. He sat on the carpet, back leaning against the couch, his eyes in the direction of the glass of wine on front of him but his vision is visibly empty.

                “Are you okay?”

                “I’m fine.” Luhan finally turned his head to look at Sehun. “You don’t believe me?”

                “Do you believe you?”

                Good question. And I’m supposed to be an actor. Luhan reached for his glass and took a swig of red wine, feeling the burn of the alcohol down his throat, eyes welling up again. He gripped the leg of the wine glass, feeling his hands ball up into fists and with a deep breath, he threw the wine glass across the room, sending the wine all over the glass cabinet, wine dripping down like diluted blood and the shards flying everywhere.

                “That SON OF A !!!” he screamed, angry tears streaming down his face. He slammed his fists into the ground and thrashed about, pushing the glass table before him and knocking down the bottle of red wine.

                “How could he do this to me? How could he be so selfish?! Fighting for his own happiness? That’s his excuse?! What about mine?! What about me?!??!? Did he ever stop to think about me?!” Luhan was pretty hysterical already. His voice was hoarse and his eyes misty with tears. Sehun sat next to him, unfazed as he watched the angel break down before him.

                “This is it. The end. It’s the end of us all! Why don’t we just go jump off a cliff, it’ll be quicker! Why don’t we just all jump in front of a train?! After all that I’ve done, after all that we have been through, he wants to leave?!? Do I mean nothing to him?! There is a week to the performance. ONE. ING. WEEK. Fans are paying to see a 2 man show, not a one man show!!!”

                Sehun simply moved a little further as he watched the boy stand up.

                “Fine, see if I care. He can go marry that idiot with the big ears for all I know. He can go die and get eaten by sharks. I don’t care! I don’t care anymore!!! I hate him!!! He’s a betrayer!!! A liar!!!! A cheater!!! He cheated me, the company, our fans, the whole ing world!!!”

                “Do you hear me?!” Luhan stomped his feet, screaming even louder. “I hate you!!!! Go die you little motherer!!! I hate…”

                SMACK!

                Luhan winced in pain as he gripped the left side of his cheek. He looked up at Sehun, who still has his incredible poker face on. He could feel the sting from the slap that was just given.

                “Wha…”

                “You say Baekhyun is selfish, but you are no better.” Sehun said, pushing the Chinese boy back down on the couch. “You think you are the victim. You suffer the most, you’re taking in all the pain, all your dreams and hopes are demolished, but do you think that he’s not suffering?”

                “You think he’s not crying? You think he’s not sad? He’s leaving his fans, the people who made him what he is today, he’s leaving you, his partner for life and the other half that made him famous. He’s giving up the chance to become an international star.” Sehun continued. “If you honestly believe that then you didn’t know him well enough, or you don’t claim him to be as important as you make it to be.”

                “He could have told me!!”

                “Told you what?” Sehun said. “Told you he’s in love? Told you he wants to get married? Told you his dreams lie in a small town away from the city life with the man of his dreams? Would that change anything if he did tell you? Would it make you feel better? Would it prevent what’s happening now? Would you help him? Do you even have the capabilities of helping him at all?”

                This time, Luhan couldn’t say a word.

                “He’s doing something that no one in a billion years would do. He wants to live his own life and he’s taking charge. But apparently, that’s a crime to you. So you’re gonna spend your nights getting drunk, tossing wine glasses and spewing red wine all over and cursing him and condemning him because in some odd and twisted way, all of this makes you feel better. It’s gonna make you more appealing. Oh, the broken and abandoned one, the one that was left behind, the one that needs to carry on alone, he’s the pitiful one, he’s the victim…”

                “You are supposed to be on my side!”

                “I side with human beings! Not childish babies!” Sehun raised his voice. Luhan slumped back down, feeling the hot tears streaming down even faster.

                “He’s a betrayer!!!”

                “From your side,” Sehun said. “To the rest of us, he’s just someone making a difference. You see what you want to see, you believe what you want to believe and you remember what you want to remember. Now, tell me, what do you want to remember from this?”

                And once again, Luhan cannot answer.

                “Why are you doing this?”

                “Because Baekhyun is the little guy.” Sehun said. “I am the little guy, just like him. The little guy is always the crazy one. The one who is insane. The black sheep. The loser. The betrayer. But it’s the little guy who makes the change the world needs. It’s the little guy who eventually becomes the bigger guy. It’s the little guy who will eventually get the happiness he needs and he deserves. The little guy will end up happier than anyone who tried to stop the little guy.”

                “And you think I won’t be happy?”

Sehun knelt down to rub Luhan’s tears. “You’re not the little guy.” He said. “You’re the one who’s hurt, but only temporarily. You can still find your way back on the road. The little guy has to make his own road.”

                “Are expecting me to forgive him for what he’s done?!”

                “No,” Sehun shook his head. “I’m asking you to let it go.”

                “I can’t…I can’t let him go…I can’t…”

                “I’m not asking you to let him go, I’m asking you to let your anger go.” Sehun grabbed Luhan’s skinny shoulders and shook him. “All that anger and resentment. All that fear and disappointment. Let that one go. That’s the one holding you back. That’s the one holding everyone back.”

                “Sehun…”

                “God is giving Baekhyun a chance so many of us would die for. A chance to start over. A chance to redirect. A chance to be different. A chance at happiness. And we are being tested by him as well. Are we capable of being as selfless and as forgiving as we claim to be and want to be?”

                “I can’t…”

                “Fine.” Sehun huffed and stood up. “If you can honestly look at Baekhyun, straight in the eye, a couple of months from now, and tell him that what he did is the biggest mistake of his life, then you win. If you can’t, then I win.”

                “Se…” the door slammed and Sehun walked out. Luhan watched the door in front of him slam shut. He fell down to the floor, choking and wheezing on his knees. He cried for a few more minutes. Then, he picked himself up and laid back on the couch, breathing heavily as he gripped his cushion covers.

                He was determined to tell Baekhyun that he made the biggest mistake of his life.

                That night, after Luhan’s cheeks were stained with dried tears and run down bits of leftover mascara and wine that has permanently stained the carpets, Sehun came back to Luhan’s apartment. He rolled up the carpets for cleaning and picked up the glass shards. He tried to salvage all that he could from the bottle and turned down the lights.

                Lastly, he kissed Luhan’s dried tears away.

                                                            ********************

                It’s hard to say why Sehun felt so strongly about Luhan’s bandmate, or perhaps ex-bandmate in this case. The past few weeks have been the best of his life. He could look at Luhan without feeling like he shouldn’t. They would end the day (or begin the next one) being curled up in each other’s arms. Sehun would sleep for a little while, then wake up to see Luhan next to him, his beautiful eyelashes against his beautiful face. There has never been a better scene to wake up to.

                His career however, was unlike his love life. I have mentioned before that Sehun was a struggling model, but perhaps I have not addressed well enough just how tough it actually is. Sehun would lie about it, but he’s been out of work for the past few weeks. His agency, Firestone Modelling Agency, manages over 500 models. He was lucky to be with a big agency, but even with a big agency doesn’t guarantee you work. He applied and auditioned for a place as Guess’s new advertisement and that was the first time he met Jongin.

                The models were waiting outside the audition room. Men and female gathered in droves. People of all skin colour and age, lanky, tall, muscular, busty and whatnot had come for the chance of a lifetime. He could see girls crowded in the bathroom, putting on layers upon layers of makeup and one of them was actually swallowing cotton balls, intended to make you feel full without eating anything.

                Sehun couldn’t help but feel terribly self-conscious. He was just another face in the crowd amongst these people. He didn’t even know why he agreed to do this. He was never going to get in. No way, no how.

                When it was his turn to audition, he walked into a room of bright lights and a panel of judges at the end. He recognized a few of them as the fashion director of Guess and even the director of the advertisement. He had auditioned before the few of them plenty of times before.

                “All right boy, show me your walk.”

                Sehun walked to end and faced the wall. He took a deep breath and turned. Don’t let anyone fool you, but believing and acting as if you are the most gorgeous person ever is not the easiest thing to do. Sehun held his head up and tucked one hand into his jean’s pocket. And he strutted over.

                “Good, can you recite lines?”

                “Yes.”

                This is where being a trainee in Starling is an added advantage. He had taken acting classes, so memorising lines was not difficult for him. The advertisement was simple. It was a male and female model pretending they were in love. He moved to where the female model was and did what the script said.

                “Very nice.” The director smiled. “You have auditioned for me before haven’t you, Mr. Oh Sehun?”

                “Yes I have Director Williams.” Sehun put on his best smile and bowed. The director smiled back this time.

                “You have improved a lot since I last met you. I like what you have done. You are the best I have seen so far.”

                “Really?” his eyes lit up in glee. This is big. If he did get the lead role in the advertisement for Guess, this would open doors to other major brands and even more opportunities for him.

                “I’ll call you.” Was the answer at the end of all that. Usually that meant “fat chance loser” but this time Sehun left feeling rather optimistic. He could actually stand a chance. He left with a smile and immediately picked up the phone to text Luhan.

To Luhan:

I think I nailed this one. Wish me luck!

                Luhan replied not too long afterwards.

To Sehun:

Good luck baby! You can do it! ^^ XOXO

                With that, Sehun’s hopes increased tenfold. He could get this.

                An hour later, auditions were over and Director Williams appeared to reveal the final casting list. A few names were called but Sehun couldn’t care less. He just wanted his name to be the last one called.

                “And finally, the male lead is awarded to, Mr. Oh…”

                “I AM SO SORRY!!!!” Everyone was taken aback by the push of the door behind them and a boy rushed in. He had blonde hair, tan skin and beautiful brown eyes. Sehun had to admit that this kid is gorgeous. But what was he doing here? Auditions were over.

                “Kim Jongin?!” Director Williams exclaimed in surprise. Sehun was even more surprised that the director knew who the boy was.

                “I am so sorry I was late. Classes ran late and there is just…” he panted heavily, pulling up his jacket. “I still want this role.”

                “You did? But when I called you denied it.”

                “I changed my mind.”

                “Bravo!!” the director clapped in glee and to Sehun’s horror and shock, he moved over and shoved past Sehun to walk towards Jongin. “Congratulations then! The role is yours!”

                “Wait, what about…”

                “Ladies and gentlemen, say hello to Kim Jongin, the new male lead of the Guess advertisement and the son of fashion icon Kim Daesung!”

                Oh, that just explained it.

                The crowd clapped and Jongin smiled widely, revealing a set of perfect teeth. Sehun felt his heart lurch down to the ground and his eyes water. He doesn’t have perfect teeth. His teeth is straight but he has those sharp canines that he is self-conscious about. He doesn’t have tan skin. He is not Jongin. He is just Sehun. He went from being Sehun the almost-male-lead to Sehun the kid who auditioned.

                He couldn’t believe he lost out to someone who didn’t even audition. Yes, Jongin is handsome but he is also rich with an influential father. He couldn’t believe Director Williams, noted and respected director, would give the role to someone just because of his father’s name. Sehun was angry, disappointed and livid.

               He grabbed his stuff and made his way out. He just wanted to go home. He couldn’t bear to stick around any longer, not when the girls are surrounding the rich brat and even the other male models were interested. He got into an elevator and proceeded to leave the building when a hand reached to hold the doors open.

                “Hey,” Jongin said as he went in. Sehun rolled his eyes under his eyelids and stepped aside. “Those girls are crazy eh?”

                “I wouldn’t know. I’ve never been mobbed.”

                “My name is Kim Jongin, what’s yours?”

                “Oh Sehun.”

                “Ah.” Jongin said nonchalantly. Sehun’s lips upturned immediately. Jongin probably knew he stole Sehun’s role. Sehun hoped he wouldn’t talk to him, and he didn’t.

                “See you.” Jongin said as left the elevator first. Sehun ran a tongue on his sharp canines and resisted the urge to flip Jongin off.

                This why we have been told to never get our hopes up, because the higher they go, the harder they fall, the more broken it becomes and the more difficult it becomes to heal.

                                                                *******************

                Things are not going any better here in Starling Stadium (I’ve been watching one too many episodes of Iron Chef). After finding out that Baekhyun ran away and sued us, Kris hired the best lawyers in the country to fight for his case. It’s difficult to say if we stand a chance of winning, but the bigger question is what do we do in the meantime. Kris’s answer is that the show must go on.

                “Are you suggesting we actually go on with this performance in London?” Minseok looked at Kris, arms crossed.

                “Of course! I worked too hard to get this offer and I am not about to back down from it! We are going to make sure that performance at the MTV EMA goes on!”

                “But I don’t think Luhan is ready.” Minseok bit his lip.

               “I agree. Plus now we have to change the choreography, he has to learn the lines…” Jongdae counted on his fingers.

                “If he is as talented as he claims he is, and as we think he is, he’ll learn those new lines and the new choreography. He can pull all-nighters, practice until he falls on the ground.”

                “But…” Minseok tried.

                “That doesn’t really sound…” Jongdae tried as well.

                “Sound what, fair?” Kris scoffed. “ it up people! This world isn’t fair! I am about to lose one of the most talented artists this company has ever seen and I am not going to damage my losses again! Stocks are falling, investors are pulling out, lawyers are haunting!”

                “Sir…”

                “I may have compromised Baekhyun’s dream but I am not about to compromise Luhan’s! The show must go on! We have fans, critics and other performers expecting the best Kpop can offer and if I let them down now I will never forgive myself or any of you in the future!”

                “Yes boss.”

                “Now go.” He waved his hand. Minseok and Jongdae walked out like two puppies with their tails between their legs. I handed Kris his water and aspirin.

                “Thank you.” He groaned, gulping down the aspirin like it was his life line. He buried his head in his hands, massaging his temples. I simply stood there and said nothing. Sometimes, silence is the best form of comfort.

                He breathed deeply for a couple of minutes and lifted his head up again, and I could see the veins in his neck, pulsing and throbbing away. He tried to hide his face again but I can see him from the reflection in the glass table. His eyes were blood shot red and his hands were tensed. His forehead was covered in sweat as he tried to breathe again.

                That’s when I realized how hypocritical he was being. He was expecting, forcing, wanting the show to go on. He knew time stopped for no man and he wanted time to move on. He wanted to move on.

                But deep down inside, he couldn’t.

                He sent me home from work, the two of us sitting in the car in stony silence. The streets were calm and quiet since we left really late. When we arrived back at my house, I turned to look at Kris and finally said something.

                “Do you want to come in?”

                “Not tonight.”

                “Tao would like to see you though.”

                He shook his head. “Tell him I’m sorry. I’ll come and see him another night.”

                I nodded. He must be tired, and frankly, so am I. I put my hand on his and squeezed it. He looked at me, an expression full of question and gratefulness.

                “You must think I’m a bad guy.”

                “No I don’t.”

                “I’m sure people out there do.”

                “You’re not bad.” I shook my head. “You’re just misunderstood.”

                “Then why do I feel so bad?”

                “I think you just feel sad.”

                We sat there for a few seconds, letting our previous conversation (albeit a short one) sink in. He patted my hand and pulled me in for a quick hug.

                “Thank you.”

                “Anytime. Good night boss.”

                “Good night.”

                I got out of the car as he drove off. I walked to the front steps to find Tao sitting outside, waiting for me. Or for Kris to be exact.

                “Isn’t he coming in?” he asked me, standing up and dusting his pants.

                “Not tonight Tao.”

                “Is he okay?”

                I paused for a minute. “No.”

                Tao paused as well, for what seems longer than a minute. “Will he be okay?”

                “He will be. He doesn’t have a choice.”

                Tao gave me a bitter half-smile. We laced our arms around each other and walked in.

A/N: Sorry about the slight delay guys! I just came back from my first day of freshman orientation and I am tired LOL But never too tired to update for you all! So please do spread the love and upvote, subscribe and comment!