credits: OhItsLai

credits: Baktinski

Dara’s POV

Something came up. I’m at Riko’s house.

That was the text I received from Jiro yesterday. I tossed my phone on my bed and looked at the mirror, noticing the dark circles in my eyes. I waited for him last night but he did not drop by, which drove me to think about a lot of things – things that made me uneasy.

I understand where Riko is coming from but does it mean that I have to endure the jealousy and insecurity gnawing me every time she requires Jiro’s attention? I’m trying to be rational about the entire thing. I tried to put myself on Jiro’s shoes and think of how I’ll handle it if I were him. Sadly, the situation is now messed up that I just ended up wallowing because of the status of my relationship with Jiro. I know he likes me even though he never said it. And knowing Jiro, he’s not the type to say those words. Still, it would be nice to hear it from him. It might put my mind at ease especially with Riko always hanging around him.

Pushing the thoughts aside, I grabbed my bag and headed towards the nearest subway station going towards the Lee residence. I haven’t seen Bullet for days and I’m beginning to get worried. It would have been better if Namee is with me but since it’s Saturday, I knew she’ll be busy with her part-time job. Besides, Bullet’s house address is not that hard to find.

The subway ride to Bullet’s house took a while since it’s a couple of stations away. I exited the station and gingerly walked along the pavement as my mind wandered to that time when I found him slumped near the back gate. I knew I hurt him, but I think I did the right thing. I just hope Bullet will be able to pull through. I miss what we have. I miss hanging out with him and goofing around with him.

Liking someone can really complicate things. Friendships can be ruined; a nice person can turn into someone she’s not; awful words are exchanged because of a bitter heart. I wonder how liking Jiro changes me. I wonder if I can look back at my former self and be proud of what I was…of what I’ve done. Truthfully, because of my feelings for Jiro, I’m beginning to get wary of Riko, which makes me think if I’m becoming narrow-minded or if my insecurities are gripping me. I hope I will not be driven by my emotions and do things that I will later regret.

Sighing heavily, I stopped upon seeing the house number of Bullet’s place. When I lifted my gaze, my eyes widened in awe at the mansion with a beautiful garden at the front yard. It feels like a royal family is residing here and my humble presence is not worthy of their time.

I decided to abandon my plan and was about to walk away when the woman who slapped Bullet opened the main door and stepped outside. She saw me standing by the gate and she strode towards me while I stood idly, not knowing what to do with myself.

“Can I help you?” She asked.

“Hello ma’am. I’m Arden’s friend. Uh… I just dropped by to chat with him.”

“Oh!” She hurriedly opened the gate and smiled at me. “Come in. He’s at the study room”, she said and ushered me to the house.

I roamed my eyes as we walked towards the study room, my mouth slightly parted in shock. The house is huge, with multiple rooms and expensive decors ornamenting the place – the glittering chandelier in the high ceiling, the antique vases, the paintings hanging on the wall. Wow. I’ve never seen anything like it. I felt like I traveled back to the medieval era. When we finally reached the study room, I half-expect the sound of trumpets followed by the announcement of our presence.

“Arden, your friend is here”, Mrs. Lee said after opening the door, revealing the floor to ceiling shelves lining the walls. Bullet is at the couch in the middle of the room with a stack of books on the floor.

“Dara?” Bullet frowned in surprise as he stood up and approached us.

“Hi.”

“I’ll just get something to drink for you two”, Mrs. Lee said as she sauntered away.

“Hey”, Bullet scratched the back of his head and gave me a lopsided smile.

“Oh my God. You didn’t tell me you live in Hogwarts”, I whispered in disbelief.

“Hogwarts? Don’t be ridiculous”, he chuckled and pulled me inside as I darted my eyes to the line of books on the shelf. “And why are you whispering?”

“Because it feels magical”, I mumbled.

“Silly”, he slumped on the floor while I sat on the couch, still marveling the beauty of the place and the abundance of books that I’m seeing. My eyes are probably sparkling. Never have I known anyone owning this much books.

“You’re drooling”, Bullet joked.

“I am?”

“You can borrow anything you like, munchkin”, he said as he grabbed a book from the stack on the floor and flipped through the pages. I sat beside him on the floor and stared at him, not knowing where to start. He’s acting like there’s nothing wrong, and I’m not sure if it’s wise to poke on the topic or if just letting it slide will do.

“Your stepmom seems nice”, I started.

“As long as she doesn’t meddle with my business, she’s alright”, he stated lazily.

“Do you still feel that you’re not part of the family, Bullet? Does she make you feel that way?”

He glanced at me momentarily before shifting his gaze again. “I’m my mother’s son. I’ll always be an outsider in this house.”

“Maybe you’re the only one thinking that way. Why don’t you try opening up yourself to them? You know, you’re really sweet, Bullet. And you’re the Lee family’s only son. I think Mrs. Lee will be happy if she’ll experience how you really are when you’re with me and Namee.”

“Why are you here, Dara? If you’re going to make me cry, I’m going to tell Namee”, he asked.

“I was worried that’s why I came here to check if you’re okay.”

“Of course I am. Why wouldn’t I be?” He exclaimed and chuckled, his eyes still glued on the book that he’s fiddling. I know he’s pretending to be fine so that things wouldn’t be awkward between us. I’m grateful for that, but it squeezes my heart to see him exerting effort to hide his pain.

I rested my chin on my bended knees and hugged my legs, silence stretching between us. “Is there anything I can do?” I mumbled. “Do you need more time? Should I not meet you?”

He sighed and threw the book that he was holding before meeting my gaze. “Don’t worry about me. I’m just sorting out my thoughts that’s why I’ve been missing lately.”

“I’m sorry”, I said in a small voice, guilt eating me up inside.

“You have nothing to apologize for.”

“I hurt you.”

“Yeah, well… I heard big boys should go through tough ”, he grinned at me and ruffled my hair. “We’re cool, Dara. I’ll still pester you because you’re my munchkin and you’ll be pissed at me and Namee will be there to prevent you from killing me. That’s how we roll.”

“Are you fine with that?” I asked.

There was a brief pause as he stared at me, pain and weariness evident in his eyes. “I can live with that”, he mumbled.

I nodded and gave him a small smile. I knew at this point, I can’t do anything for him. He’s trying to pull through and it’s a struggle that he has to face himself. As the Fire 39 leader, it is a known fact that Bullet is a strong and tough guy. But this is a fight unlike his other fights. I know he’ll win though, because he carries a strength that I admire. Despite his immature front, Bullet is strong enough to bare his heart.

Liking someone can complicate things. I’m glad Bullet is trying to make things simple for both of us.

***

After dropping by Bullet’s house, Dara roamed aimlessly and eventually sat on a bench in the park and watched the people passing by. The sun was about to set; the orange sky and the steady movement around her easing her tired mind.

Moments later, a cute little boy approached her, a lollipop. He stood in front of her and eyed her curiously, his round eyes blinking innocently as he pulled the lollipop from his mouth.

“Hi”, Dara greeted and smiled at the boy.

“Do you want to be my mom?”

“What?” She asked, completely dumbfounded. When she heard someone shouting from a distance, she whipped her head and was surprised to see Bonsai running towards her. His eyes, however, are settled on the boy in front of her.

“You brat! I told you not to roam around!” Bonsai snarled at the boy before looking at her. “Ey, Dara!” He greeted in surprise.

“Hello”, she said.

“Can she be our mom?” The boy asked while pointing at her using his lollipop.

“Hell no!” Bonsai screeched. “Sorry Dara. This kid is really weird.”

“I didn’t know you have a love child”, Dara chuckled while ruffling the kid’s hair.

Bonsai rolled his eyes and slumped on the bench beside Dara. “He’s my brother. I was asked to babysit him”, he said, lifting the child up and handing the kid to Dara.

“Why are you giving him to me?”

“I’m tired of babysitting him.”

“So?”

“I don’t know. Throw him away.”

Dara chuckled and let the boy sit on her lap. “What’s your name?” She asked.

“Battou”, the kid replied.

“Battou?” Dara frowned and looked at Bonsai. “Battou..Tsai? Doesn’t it sound like…Battousai?”

“Yep”, Bonsai grunted in response. “The manslayer.”

“Seriously?”

“Yeah”, He leaned back and draped his arm on the bench. “My dad thinks playing with his kids’ names is hilarious.”

“My name is cool”, Battou argued. “Yours is funny.”

Bonsai glared at the kid who was sitting comfortably on Dara’s lap.

“Why is he looking for a mother?”

“He didn’t get to see our mom because she passed away when he’s still a baby.”

“Oh. I’m sorry.”

“Nah. This punk just want a pretty lady in the house because we’re all boys – my dad and the four of us brothers. Anyway”, he turned to Dara and cocked his eyebrows at her. “What are you doing here? Shouldn’t you be in the Ice Lord paradise?”

“I don’t know where he is”, Dara said, averting her gaze. “He received a text yesterday and left. It turns out he headed to Riko’s house. Maybe he’s still there.”

“Oh crap… I’m sorry woman, but this topic is out of my expertise. Let me text Picaro”, Bonsai said as he pulled out his phone and started typing a message before Dara can say another word. “You see, anything that involves serious talk, Rostelli is the man for the job”, he added.

“It’s okay, Bonsai. Sorry for making you uncomfortable”, Dara said while Battou’s hair. Bonsai shifted his gaze at her, noticing her somber expression.

“Battou, make her smile”, Bonsai instructed. His youngest brother always has a way of lightening up things in their messed up house and he believes the kid can handle a sad woman more than he can.

Battou pulled out something from his pocket and offered it to the girl. “Lollipop?”

Dara smiled at him and took the candy; removing the wrapper and placing it in . See? Problem solved.

“Why are you sad?” Battou asked innocently. “Bonsai did something, didn’t he?”

“Hey!” Bonsai cried out in protest but the kid just looked at him with disinterest.

“This is why we need a mom. Dad is getting tired because of you.”

“You’re a psycho”, Bonsai retorted. “Go play somewhere”, h