Lashing out
Troubled Confession
Chapter Two
I walk out of my car and cross my fingers in the hopes that the person I hit isn’t going to start a scene with me. The last thing I want is to get into a confrontation with a stranger. I’m already fighting with my siblings and that’s enough to deal with. Why is today so crappy? Stupid weddings.
“I’m so sorry.” I walk up to the male and when he turns to face me, I notice he looks mad but his frowned eyebrows relax and soften when he looks up at me. “I’ll exchange my insurance and they’ll take care of the costs. Are you okay?”
“Uh, don’t worry about it.” He looks at the rear of his car. “It’s just a fender bender.” He touches the damaged part of his vehicle.
I play with my phone from being slightly nervous. “That’s a little more than a small bump. I broke your tail light and not that my car matters but my hood is...a bit lifted.”
He smiles. “I’m trying to get you out of this situation but now you’re making a point.”
I nod, “Give me a minute to get my information—”
He laughs, “I was kidding. It’s fine, really. I’m not trying to be an but this is easy money to fix. Almost like putting gas money.” He notices I’m not laughing or as easy about this scenario so he quickly adds. “But, I’ll provide my insurance to you so it can cover your costs. Easily.”
Why is he being so simple when I’m the one who caused this incident? “No need.” I pull my phone and take a picture of his car and license plate. “I’ll send this to my insurance and let them know I’m taking 100% fault. What’s the name of your insurance company?”
“Kai.” He smiles.
I raise an eyebrow not to be rude, only because I’ve never heard of it and it sounds...interesting. “Okay.” I start to compose an email to insert the picture I took and as I type the name of his insurance, I say ‘Kai’ out loud.
“Yes?” He replies
I look up, “Yes. How do you spell it? May you also provide the phone number?”
Once he tells me how to spell the name, he passes the contact information as well. Once I’m done typing, I quickly proof read before pressing send. I look up and take notice that he’s staring at me, almost like observing me?
“All set. I’m sorry for the inconvenience. Please, let me know if there are any other problems so I can ensure you’re taken care of.” I want to make sure I provide additional help to be safe and avoid any surprises. He seems fine now but can turn out to be a for all I know.
“You didn’t cause any inconveniences.” He leans on his car and crosses his arms. “The only problem I have is that I didn’t catch your name.”
I politely smile and provide it for cooperation purposes. “Yeji.”
“Are you okay Yeji? Are you hurting or feel any pain?” He asks gently.
Physically, no. Emotionally, more than I want. “I’m fine.”
I know he’s referring to the minor accident but I swear that question is a trigger word to my brain because I felt like I slightly answered with a tone.
I clear my throat. “I asked earlier but I want to make sure you’re okay?”
He smiles and replies, “I’m okay. Thank you.” His phone rings and he excuses himself.
I stand there realizing I don’t need to linger any longer but it doesn’t feel right just driving off without a proper dismissal. I pucker my lips slightly to the side as I wait for him to finish his call. After a few minutes pass by, the male walks back and I take my opportunity to end this to go on about my daily tasks.
“Well, your people are very quick.” He smiles. “All taken care of. Thank you.”
Finally! I open the door to the driver seat and before getting in, I kindly respond. “Again, I’m sorry for all of this. I have to get back to my office, but you have their contact information if there is anything else we may assist you with. I hope you have a great week ahead.”
I drive off and I see him wave good-bye as I head back to the street. I got lucky during the process, he didn’t want to get cops involved for statements or care to exchange insurance information. Even when Baekhyun isn’t around, he’s causing problems for me.
My eyes are focusing on both monitor screens that are elevated for me to work standing up. I’m looking at previous history files and profiles of our loyal guests to find accommodations after the Lee’s wedding. The Resort turning into a buyout is great numbers for us. However, trying to explain it to over 1,000 loyal guests to have them make changes that they’ve planned before this billion dollar wedding takeover, not so great.
I get a knock on my door that’s wide open and Sehun’s voice causes me to briefly look up. “Who’s the new hottie?”
He tries to be discreet as he eyes Jinah sitting at her desk outside my office. I shake my head.
“Stay away from my employees.” I warn and get back to work.
He smiles. “I only said it to bug you. I know you hate it when the family mixes business with pleasure.”
“Is there a legitimate reason you are here or can grown ups get back to work?”
He laughs, “I didn’t realize being 24 with a bachelors in a three year program working to pass the bar exam isn’t grown up for you.” He teases but I continued working. “I just wanted to stop by and check in...see how you’re doing.” He takes a seat and places his hands on top of my large desk.
“I swear if one more person asks me how I’m doing, I’m going to send a public email and announce I’m fine.”
He laughs at my unintended joke. “The big brother mentioned what happened between you two before lunch. I just wanted to see if you’re okay from the fight.”
I sigh, “I’m sorry.” I sit down and place my hands over my head and massage my forehead. “It’s just been a long day.”
“Well, you’ve been gone for nearly a year and your first week back you get a lot thrown at you.”
He’s being careful with his words because I know he’s talking about this wedding project. I stare out the window and decide to open up to my little brother.
“You know, I was so broken in those first six months when it all happened. I tried to be strong after it because I was so tired of living in misery but everyday I woke up...it was there, it’s still there. I came back for normalcy and to rebuild strength but it’s like life wants to laugh at me. It’s mocking me, it’s saying ‘hey you’re almost moving on, remember this?” and here I am having to face the things I’ve worked hard to avoid to not bring back my pain. Now I have to keep The Lee wedding on my radar.”
“Then,” He hesitates. “Well, I guess...it’s the wrong time to tell you.” He his lips. “At lunch I was going to bring it up but I don’t even know how? Especially now, after hearing how you really feel.”
“What did you do?” I blankly stare as I watch him have a difficult time trying to spill it out.
“I kind of had this plan...well more like a planned meeting.” He’s getting nervous because he’s starting to smile like an idiot that causes his eyes to crease into a moon shape. He smiles from being shy and uncomfortable, not because he thinks something is funny.
“Oh my god, what? Say it already!” I bluntly encourage.
The phone to my office rings and since my little brother needs a minute, I decide to answer and when I do, Jinah informs me that a third party insurance company is on line 3. I hesitate to take the call simply because my insurance should be handling this, I should never have to take these type of calls during my work hours.
I scratch the top of my eyebrow giving in. “I’ll take the call.” I end the line with her and answer the unprofessional insurance company. “This is Yeji.”
I hear a male voice at the other end of the call. “Good afternoon Ms. Yeji, this is Kai.”
“Yes, I have an understanding my insurance contacted your client and he informed me that everything is taken care of. If there seems to be an issue I can connect you directly if you’d like?”
“Well, there does seem to be an issue. You see, our client feels like your insurance couldn’t provide him the best customer satisfaction. So, he has a couple requests.”
The nerve of this man! I knew it. What could he possibly want more than his car expenses being paid for. He’s driving a stupid Lamborghini!
“I’m sure my team can work something out. Speak to them and I’ll review it. They have their own policies as I’m sure your cooperate does as well. I just can’t get involved to assist in that way.” I use my firm voice to make it clear that I can’t do much more than I already did.
“Unfortunately Ms. Yeji, asking you out to dinner would make you be involved. I don’t think their policies would be in charge of your personal life, would they?”
“Excuse me?”
I hear a small chuckle. “Kai isn’t the name of my insurance. It’s actually my name. The contact number you sent to your insurance company was mine. When they called me I gave them my real insurance information. I arranged it with my people to pay for your damages.” He pauses. “So, how about it? I handled the expenses and all you would have to do is owe me your time during dinner?”
“Well,” I take a minute to understand what’s happening and as soon as I do, I know what I have to do. I smirk with annoyance. “Kai, is it? You can’t buy me simply because you paid for something you had no right to pay for. I don’t owe you anything for that, especially my time.”
I slam the phone as I feel enraged that he would think I would go out with him after fixing my car when it was my fault! Why do men think they can just do whatever they want and expect us to be at their feet? !
Sehun’s smile had vanished and he sits up straight. “What happened?”
“I crashed into someone earlier and this person who I was on the phone with just now, paid for my damages when I had already went out of my way to submit a claim to my insurance to cover all the costs.” I stand up and without realizing I begin to type on the keyboard heavily. “Oh and he tried to be cool by making me think his name and information was his insurance but really it was his own personal number. Then, he has the nerve to ask me out to dinner because I owe him that for fixing my car.”
He slightly opens his mouth before realizing what to say. “Why is the dinner part bad? Maybe you’re misinterpreting it and he actually wants to take you out?”
I stop doing what I’m doing and just intensely stare at him. Did he just forget what I said earlier? I don’t have time to go out with anybody and that’s the last thing I would ever want. Scratch that, I don’t want that or ever want it.
He smirks and continues, “I actually think that’s pretty smooth the way he made his move on you. I don’t really understand why be this upset about it?”
“You know why you don’t understand? It’s because you’ve never devoted your years to someone and gave them everything. Gave them unconditional love, crazy amount of chances, and a vulnerable part of yourself only to have them hurt you over, over, and over again. No one shattered every inch of your soul when they left you on your wedding day!”
I don’t realize how out of breath I am after lashing out what I’ve been holding in to myself for months. I’m mortified for taking it out on my little brother and I notice the door is wide open. I’m not sure if anyone really heard but I’m certain I wasn’t quiet about my opinion.
This is the second person I care for deeply that I snap at. I don’t want to fight with my brothers, not when they’ve done their best to be there for me during it all.
“You’re right.” He smiles to be polite as he stands up, acting like I didn’t hurt his feelings in some way. “I’m sorry.” He scratches the right side of his cheek. “I’ll see you later at mother’s.” He respectfully walks away.
“Sehun” I softly say his name to let him know I’m regretting the way I spoke to him. “I didn’t—”
He shakes his head to disagree and turns to face me. “No. Don’t worry about it.”
His precious and understanding heart makes me feel like crap. “Hey, what did you want to tell me earlier?”
“We can talk about it later, I’ll let you get back to work.” He smiles to reassure me he’s not mad at me, even though he should be after being a to him.
“No, you’ve been trying to tell me and I want to know, please?” I plant a small smile on my face to let him know I’m sincere.
He sighs and nods. “I set you up on a date with one of my Professor’s Junior partner but I’ll cancel it. I shouldn’t have assumed after a year you’d be ready to put yourself out there. You have every right to decide when you are and no one else.” He says goodbye and leaves my office.
I’m left alone in the silence, in my silence as I space out the distant voices and phones ringing in the background. I don’t know how to move on, it’s been this long and I still don’t know how to move on.
Before ending the day to leave the office, I stop by Jinah’s desk to check-in on any last minute messages. She gives me a brief summary for what’s to come tomorrow but let’s me know she’ll send me a pass down email. I nod and thank her for today, as I’m walking away she speaks up.
“Oh Ms. Yeji, the storage company called. This evening their moving contractors completed the transfer to move your belongings into your condo. I’ll be happy to assist you with unpacking and settling in.” She smiles.
That threw me off. All the furniture from my old apartment had been stored away because we were going to shop new ones for our new home. Good thing I never sold or got rid of my stuff, at least I made one smart choice during that time.
“I’d appreciate that, I’ll let you know. Thank you.” I wish her a good evening and head out. I will most definitely be having a glass of wine tonight.
A glass turned into a bottle for me during dinner at my mother’s. She was so happy to have the three of us together again. Even though I had blow outs with each brother today, we wouldn’t get our mother involved and we’d act normal for her sake.
After hearing everything Sehun has been up to, Chanyeol excuses himself to take a call, and I excuse myself to use the restroom. However, I feel a nice buzz and decide to go to my room to just lay down for a while. When I pass through the double doors to my bedroom, I start thinking about how it’s my last night here once more. The last time I was here it was the night before my wedding day, the difference between then and now is that this time I actually have somewhere to go.
As I take off my heels, I get this strong urge to dial a number I knew by heart. I know this confidence is just alcohol courage because there’s nothing more I want than to yell at the idiotic, selfish, bastard face...secretly kind hearted, amazing kisser, who was surprisingly romantic, and person I’m still in love with. Oh my god! What is wrong with me? I can not and will not dare to call Baekhyun. Knowing him he probably changed his number but then again he could surprise me by still having it, obviously he likes surprising me. Except, I’m not even surprised that he hasn’t tried to reach me because that’s my typical Baek. He always left it up to me to fix it all, to always fix it. I’m so pathetic.
Suddenly my fingers start moving through my phone to look for something. Next thing I know I cut and paste a number on my keypad and wait for it to ring, after the 4th ring I get an answer and hear his voice.
“Hello?”
“Kai, why did you ask me out to dinner?”
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