CHAPTER SEVEN

Now, I understand how Eve felt when she wanted the forbidden fruit. A sin will always feel good and right while we commit it, and when it’s done it will turn into and guilt. I arch, offering myself as Yunho’s lips begin nibbling down my neck. My brain is fogged with lust, anger and disappointment. This is not what I’ve been dreaming. I always picturing making love with Yunho will be about love and tenderness.

This is the total opposite. This is only . My body is pinned between him and the front door of his house. His hands are everywhere. His angry mouth is my skin, planting kiss over there and here. Still, it’s not enough to relief the ache.

“You feel so good.” His voice sends shiver all over me.

He the tender skin on my neck and I feel a heat seeped between my legs. I tighten my legs and he hisses on my ear.

“Bed.” I pant.

His mouth is back on mine, demanding and greedy. When he pulls away, I see a flash of pain in his eyes.

“At least I have a taste of heaven before I go straight to hell.”

Almost. It’s almost making me stop. But we’ve gone too far. The snap of my jeans is unfastened. I have marks on my neck. And my hands don’t want to stop from exploring him. I’ve never done this before. But I want my first to be Yunho.

“Bed.” I say against his lips. “Please.”

He kisses me long and hard before walking us upstairs. His bed. Was there any other woman before? Will I be the first? His hand my back as if he is comforting me.

“Don’t go there Sweetpea. I haven’t been with anyone for two years.”

I beg your pardon? Is that supposed to make me feel better? It doesn’t matter Yuri. This is only about . No feeling involved. You’re supposed to enjoy this. “I don’t care.”

He growls in my ear. “The hell you don’t. I care about this.”

I turn my head so that I can kiss him again. At first he let me, he even kisses me back. But then he pulls away.

“You’re not going to distract me. We will talk about this if it’s still bothering you.”

His expression is hard and that when I realize I’ve hurt him again. Don’t feel. Don’t feel.

I whimper. “Later. We’ll talk later.”

We arrive shortly in front of his bedroom. But Yunho doesn’t open the door immediately. I wait in panic, afraid that he probably going to back away. His eyes search mine in the dim light hallway. I gulp down. I would surely bawl if he turns me down.  

“W-what are you waiting for?” I stutter.

He leans down and kisses me gently. “You. I wait for you.”

Huh? “I’m here.”

His thumb my cheek gently that I lean my face into his touch. “But we know your heart doesn’t.”

I hate that he can easily smash down the wall I’ve built so hard just with a pained look and few soft words. “I’m here and that’s the only matter.”

“I didn’t bring you here for Sweetpea.” He whispers softly.

The pet name feels like a punch in the gut. It makes me feel like a child again. I’m supposed to be a nice girl, not wild and naughty. I untangle my legs from his waist because suddenly it feels so wrong. Maybe I’ll live forever as a spinster, because turned down by someone you love while you offering your self is going to be a lifetime reminder that you are beyond plain.

I push him away and duck my head, unable to meet his eyes without him seeing me humiliated. I should pretend that it’s okay, that I would survive.

“I guess I’ll just pass the dinner.” I force a laugh which surely sounds nothing like a laugh. I clear my throat as I begin smoothing back my clothes with shaking hands. “This is awkward. I should go.”

Yunho doesn’t say anything. He is just standing in front of m