7 MONTHS LATER---

 

 

 

NO ONE POV

 

“Congratulations, hyung!”

 

Ryeowook exclaimed as he hugged his own un biological-hyung, Leeteuk and soon followed by hugging Kangin, Heechul and Hankyung.

“Thanks, Wookie ah,” Leeteuk said.

 

They are all in the Rakooga ball room now, at the graduation of the 3^rdgrade. Most of Rox are coming to the graduation to congratulate 4 of them because they’re just finished studying at high school by now.

“Hyungs, let’s take a picture!”

 

Leeteuk and the others lining up as the other of Rox are standing close to them, so they can get into the frame as Sungmin readying himself with his camera.

 

“Say kimchi!”

 

 

---

 

The graduation and photo session is over now. Leeteuk and Kangin were on their way with car whose belong to Kangin. Their face were happy, since now they’re already finish those studies and will continue to the same university so they won’t be separated.

 

But slight sadness still formed on their face.

“We’re arrived, hon,”  Kangin said as he shut down the car and stepped outside. He opened the passenger door and Leeteuk smiled at him, pecking his lips. “Thank you, Kangin ah,”

 

“everything for my fiance,”

 

Yeah, Kangin has proposed Leeteuk to get marry with him and of course Leeteuk accepting so that now they’re both engaged. So does Heechul and Hankyung. No one knows when they both engaged but they say they want to get married in China, where Hankyung born, as soon as Hankyung took over his dad’s company.

Ryeowook has becoming Yesung’s boyfriend now with the help of Rox, which makes him happier than those time when he still with Kyuhyun.

 

It went well and nice, so does the relationship between Siwon and Kibum, and Victoria with Changmin. They both happy with each other and it goes the same like Fox. Xiah got his boyfriend already and everyone happy with it.

 

Everything changes.

 

 

Except one.

 

 

---

 

 

A knock can be heard as Leeteuk and Kangin standing in front of the door. A guy who looks pale—since ever—opened it and widened his eyes seeing who’s coming.

 

“Leeteuk hyung, Kangin hyung,” he said, brightly. “Congratulations for your graduation!”

Kangin chuckled and nodded. “Thank you, Eunhyuk ah,”

 

Hyukjae walked inside and Leeteuk sighed softly seeing another figure that’s always there since a long, long time ago. “How... How’s he doing?” it hurts him by asking question which no one will ever know the answer.

 

Hearing that, Hyukjae curved a little smile—a bitter smile to be exact—as he sat on the sofa. His eyes eyeing Leeteuk and Kangin, then down to the figure on bed as well.

 

“He’s fine, hyung. Don’t worry,” he said, faking his smile wider. “See? He just only sleeping,”

 

Kangin and Leeteuk stared at each other now, and both sighing in confusion. Leeteuk carefully sat beside Hyukjae and he Hyukjae’s back slowly.

 

“When I can talk to him?” Leeteuk asked.

 

Hyukjae smiled again, “As soon as he woke up,”

 

 

Kangin feels he can’t bare seeing Hyukjae like this, so he blurted out.

 

 

“But he never wake up, Eunhyuk,”

 

 

Hyukjae’s body suddenly stiffened and he swallowed hard. Smiles disappeared from the beautiful face of his, even the fake one.

“But he’s not… die yet,” Hyukjae said as he looked down.

 

Leeteuk nod his head quickly while still Hyukjae’s back. “We know… we know that,” he said softly. “But you have to keep moving on, Eunhyuk ah,”

Hyukjae flinched. “If I’ve moved on, then what about Hae?” he asked, exclaiming. Now tears are forming again in his eyes as he can’t even hold it.

 

Guess right.

 

Hyukjae is the one who remains the same.

 

 

Or wait,

 

Maybe one thing.

 

 

He can smile now.

 

A bit.

 

 

-----===-----===-----

 

 

HYUKJAE POV

 

 

I stepped out of Hae room after I give him a quick peck on his lips. “I’ll be back, Hae,” I whispered on his ear and smiled a little after I saw his peaceful face.

I want to be beside him forever.

 

the short goodbye that told me to take care
has remained deep inside my heart

 

I drove to the cafe near Fukuura and Rakooga and about 15 minutes later, I’ve reached the place. It was Friday. It suppose to be a good day on this sunny day because tomorrow people is free. That’s why this cafe seems more full thank the usual weekdays.

“Welcome, sir,” a waiter said and I nod at her. I walked to my favorite place at that café as I stared around, searching for person I’ve said to come because I rarely saw him now.

 

“ah, that area is already full, sir,” the waiter said to my direction, my favorite area in the corner of the café. I frowned then asked. “Which place is empty?”

“Maybe there will do, you’re not smoking right?” I nodded and followed where she pointed to the table for two near the window.

 

I frowned more. It’s near so many lovebirds that got their lunch together and the place… the place is…

 

 

it will only become mixed with my feelings and become a longing

I guess I couldn't endure it any longer

 

 

“w-why there?” I unconsciously asked.

The waiter stared at me, confused. “Well, that’s the only place empty sir,”

 

I sighed and start walking to the said table as I sat on the chair. My heart hurt remembering last time I sat here. I never sat here anymore since the day I ate with Hae in the near of Sport Festival last year and here I am, sitting here again.

 

Without Hae.

 

“You want to order something?” She asked and I nodded. After ordering, she went back to her place before and from afar, I notice someone—2 people walking towards me. Smile crept on my face.

 

“Hi, Hyuk ah!! You sit here, it’s not the usual place we sit right?” It’s Xiah. He said as he sat in front of me with another guy he brings.

I just sighed hearing his statement. “I know, but our usual place is occupied, and this is the only spot empty,”

 

“I see,” he muttered.

“Junsu, do you want to eat something?” the person beside him asked. It’s my old friend, Yoochun. He’s already being Xiah’s boyfriend now, and they met at the hospital where Hae is. There’s a day when Yoochun with Yunho and the others are visiting me there and so does Xiah. They met and now they become couple.

 

And it has been 3 months they are together already.


I swear I thought It's been a year.

 

the days that seemed to pass so quickly
why did it suddenly become so slow

 

Xiah stared at me and smiled. “How’re you doing this week? Well?”

I nodded without saying a word.

 

Right, I’m not schooling anymore. Or maybe I am, I’m schooling only when there’s someone for Hae that day. I’m accompanying Hae everyday, waiting for him to opened his eyes but I don’t know when he will does that.

No one knows, even the doctors.

 

You might be wondering why Xiah just let me skipped school. Twice a week, he asked me to visit this cafe—SM cafe—and he gave me all the notes he wrote at school, just for me to study so I won’t be left behind with those subjects.

 

At first, I don’t want to.

Yeah I mean, what if that day Hae is alone? What if Hae opened his eyes that day? But after forcing me for so long, finally I agreed with that.

 

“Here, math notes,” Xiah said as he handed me a blue covered note book that used to be my notes but he copy his notes in it. “3rd graders just graduated and that means we’re almost being one now,”

 

Yoochun nodded at me in agreement. “We’re about to do the last exam now, Hyuk ah. Please study okay?”

 

I sighed.

 

Last exam... It’s last exam already? And how about Hae? He skipped the exam too?

 

Thinking about that makes me feel... I don’t know, sad.

 

 

Of course I am.

After the foods has arrived, we’re all eating silently and all of the couple in Rox and Fox, even my friends from Sapphire High School, they never ever showing any romance at all with their lovers in front of me.

 

I know why.

 

I just actually, don’t really likes it.

It’s true I may be sad seeing those romantic moment but, I want they become comfortable in front of me.

 

But yah, whatever.

 

“Hey, Hyuk,” Xiah called out, made me stare at him. “are you really still want to company him?”

 

 

My heart seems stopped.

I know where this lead to.

 

This, this again!?

 

Why does everyone keeps telling me the same thing??

 

“What do you want me to do?” I asked, gritted my teeth as I try to steadying my feelings before it could blurted out.

Xiah and Yoochun stared at each other and then sighed, “You know... It’s been 7 months already since his... accident, and there’s no sign of him for waking up,”

 

I clenched my fist.

 

“Even the doctors. They said they won’t know when Donghae will woke up, it depends. Right?”

“Depends on what?” I asked slowly.

Xiah stared at me. I know what he mean and I’m sure he knows it.

“It depends on him want to open his eyes or not,” Xiah shrugged, “Says the doctor,”

 

I just keep silent.

 

So? I know that already. Is he trying to say that Hae won’t woke up because there’s no sign for him to about open his eyes, and he asking me to stop waiting for him?

 

“You... you deserve a better life, Hyuk ah,”

 

I felt like I couldn’t take it anymore.

 

“What’s the better life you meant!?” I yelled, more likely in frustration.

 

My life will be worst if I’m not be beside Hae.

 

My life will be meaningless if there’s no Hae beside me.

 

My life with Hae will be my happiest life ever and people keep trying to separating us.

 

 

Hae loves me.

 

 

I know someday he will wake up for me.

 

I just…

 

 

I just have to wait, right?

 

Your warm voice, your crying face
Came to me once again

 

“H-Hyuk, sorry, I just…” Xiah stutters, maybe not expecting me to be mad, but I really am now.

Yoochun stared at me, his expression became serious. “Hey, Hyuk ah,”

 

I glance at him.

 

“We’re all just wanted to helping you. It’s better if you keep your study and make yourself busy so you can forget Donghae for a while. He won’t be going anywhere,”

 

I swallowed hard.

 

Nobody on my side.

 

I sip a last shot of my cappuccino, and then leave them after I muttered thank you.

 

Of course I don’t want to forget Hae.

 

Even a minute.

Even a second.

 

I ran to the hospital as I still have my tears suffocating my throat, still not dare to let it out but I swear this feeling is hurting me so much.

 

Why they keep telling me that.

 

I just want to be by Hae side.

I just want to see his face everytime I woke up.

Even his sleeping face.

 

I just want to know that he’s safe with me.

 

I just…

 

I just missed Hae.

 

The overwhelming tears finally began to flow

even if I live with the feelings, they fill my mind completely
 

I arrived at Hae’s room and not bothering to knock as I know nobody is inside.

Running and hugging.

 

And crying, embracing him.

That’s what I do to make myself relieve.

 

Hugging him,

Whining endlessly to him.

 

Letting out my tears.

 

and emptying it over and over, as if that's all right
I guess I can't do anything

 

I tried to shed my tears because I know, these tears are worthless, it won’t wake Hae up and still won’t change everything.

 

Hae, wake up.

 

Baby…

Open your eyes.

 

Pleading, begging to you.

I just want you to wake up at least for a minute.

 

I haven’t…

 

I know he won’t hear my pleads

Nor my sobbing sound

 

But I still owe you one, Hae.

 

I want you to wake up now.

So that you can hear me.

Because I couldn't tell you I love you

Because I couldn't tell you that you were my love

Because I couldn't say the words that are in my heart

 

I’m sorry Hae.

 

Thinking about our time together,

 

How I keep being a crybaby when I know I couldn’t return your love.

And you still not giving me up.

 

How I keep saying I don’t feel the same way as you.

And you still being so nice.

 

How we kissed.

How we hug.

 

How you pulled me into your warm embrace.

Even I know you’re hurting inside.

 

Don’t you know that I missed you?

Don’t you know that my only passion to live these 7months is to see your cheerful face?

Don’t you know that I’m desperately waiting for you here?

 

Whole day, everyday?

 

Isn't it enough?

 

I miss you, Hae.

I miss you.

 

Please…

I can't do anything
I can't see anything

I can't move

 

Hae!

 

I know you actually can hear me there!

 

What’s so hard with opening your eyes?

What’s so hard with hugging me back?

 

What’s so hard with sat there and listen to my confession?

I can't stop my tears and I don’t  think I'll stop until Hae can shed it for me,

 

Like he always did.

I just shout your name endlessly all day


If we ended like this now
I wouldn't be able to breathe

 

 

I won’t give up.

 

I won’t give up on you, baby.

Because I'm a fool that can't live without you

I love you, I'm waiting for you

 

I felt my tears won’t stop flowing.

Why I’m too desperate to see you opening your eyes?

 

 

You said you want to protect me!

You said you will take care of me.

 

Give me prove.

 

 

Please,

 

Please just listen to me once.

 

Because I couldn't tell you I love you


Because I couldn't tell you that you were my love


Because I couldn't say the words that are in my heart

I glance at a small table beside his bed where I put new flowers in that vase every week.

 

That letter’s still there.

 

 

Damn you Hae.

 

You said you will risk your life for me.

 

Is it this way?

 

When you haven’t even hear my truly confession from my heart?

 

 

Is that it?

 

You asked me to not go from your side.

 

Now I'm here, now I'm not even once leave from your side.

I didn't even continue my life because you are my life, and I couldn't continue without you.

 

 

Are you trying to punish me for making you wait that long?

I couldn’t help but grabbing the letter and re read it again for thousand times already.

 

 

I don’t read this in your embrace, Hae.

 

I don’t lean on your chest.

 

Please wake up so I can do it now.

I'm sorry I've hurt you back those days.

But please wake up once.

And I won't let you go.

 

I can't do anything
I can't see anything

I can't move


I just shout your name endlessly all day

 

I don’t need your apology.

I don’t need you to feel thankful.

 

I only need you to hear me now.

Please let me say this for you while you hear this for me.

 

 

Please.

Please open your eyes and respond.

 

Hae…

 

All day, I shout your name.

 

 

 

“ I love you,”

 

 

 

 

==========================================================================================

[a/n]: I know this is not a good update...

but I promise for updating really soon for next chapter...

I just tidying my mood because it has broken a little because of EunHae and those 'blind date' thingy... it really messed me up -_-

hope you have another patience~ kkk

I love youuuu!!!