Jaejoong’s POV

“Jaejoong are you there?” Yunho cried. 

I bit my fist, keeping my silence, silently hoping that he wouldn’t notice me on the other side of the line. 

Yunho laughed bitterly, “Of course you’re not there”, he whispered.
“Even in my dreams all I think about is you and the future we could have had. The memories we shared and the times when I wasn’t so bitterly blinded by hatred and lust.” 

I was shocked at the amount of regret and sincerity I heard from his voice. I wiped the tears from the eyes, as I held onto my phone tightly, hoping he would continue. 

“You. You are all that I can think about”, Yunho whimpered, “The last thing on my mind and the first face I see when I open my eyes.” Loud rustlings were heard, as Yunho struggled to re-compose himself. 

“I only wish I was able to tell you this to your face, confess and apologize for my sins. But I am a coward, a coward of a man, a coward of a husband, and a coward of a father, that I could not bring myself to face you again… There is something I need to tell you Jaejoongie…”

Yunho inhaled deeply, preparing himself to say the next few sentences he always tried to elude from. But today, today he will tell Jaejoong the truth, even if Jaejoong never gets the chance to hear it. 

Because it is always better to have loved and lost, then to never have loved at all. 

“I just want you to know Boo that I did this all for you. I gave up everything I had, so I could lead a simple life. I gave up my life filled with luxury to do something I needed to do to wash away all the sins and purify my soul for all the things I have done, to you, to Changmin and to our … I mean your family.” 

Mind filled with fear and panic I was afraid of the next few words that Yunho was going to say. I was afraid that Yunho was going to leave us for good…again.

Even though we never had a chanc