Chapter 55
Locked with You
He felt it through his bones, the stinging pain of karma was crushing him to the point that he didn’t know if he’ll be able to recover from it this time. The consequences of his actions were now tearing him apart and this time, he may probably lose the one person that he cherished the most. And losing her would be like ending his life.
He closed his eyes, shook his head and prayed for his sanity not to give up on him. He needed a clear mind now the most and that was why he drove all the way here right after his and Taeyeon’s exchange in his and his brother’s refuge to seek for a clear mind. Yet no matter how much he tried to persuade himself not to give up, the fear of losing Dara from this was crippling him and bringing him back to the lowest point of helplessness.
“You’re the only one who can make me leave, Jiyong. I’m yours till your words say otherwise”
He opened his eyes as his wife’s words chanted in his mind. With jaw’s clenched, brows furrowed and chest aching with an overwhelming feeling, he buried his face in his hands as the words kept repeating in his mind. There, he cried a soundless cry. His wife’s words replaced the brokenness in him, putting back all the pieces together. For a moment he was ashamed of being so weak. How could he give up first when all Dara did was to fight his battles together with him? All this time she had been so strong, how could he be so weak in return? Taking a deep breath, he straightened. Helplessness was now drained out from his system as hope filled him. He wasn’t alone now… not like before except for Taeyeon’s fake company. There was still a chance to make everything right… there always was… and he will use it well to make certain that he was worth or would be worth of Dara’s pain… but especially, that he was worth her love. He was not going to give up not when now, through his every battle, Dara would be with him.
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She could hear them even though they think she can’t. She didn’t know if they were doing it on purpose or that she was just sensitive to voices especially when she could hear her name in them. It wasn’t the first time she heard people murmuring things about her. She could remember them talking as well the first time she came to university after she married Jiyong. It died after some time but now here they were again, talking about her as if she wasn’t there to hear them. She couldn’t make out what they were talking about, she wanted to ignore it but their scrutinizing gaze was making it hard to do so and especially, Chaerin was not around this time to occupy her thoughts and shield her away from those people.
But her friend’s absence was immediately aided by another friend’s company, Youngbae. He came to her side during lunch with his familiar silence but this time he looked aggravated and at first she thought he was mad at her only to realize that he was mad at the people around them who was looking at them and talking to each other. She saw it with the way he threw menacing glares to people who pass by them. Watching him, she finally managed to smile. She reached for his hand on the table to get his attention. She succeeded when she felt him stiffened before turning to her.
“Just ignore them.” She told him. At first, he only looked at her, his brows furrowed as if he was struggling inside. She realized she was already used to him looking like that whenever he looked at her so she only just smiled and turned back to her food. She could still feel his eyes on her and so, not to make the atmosphere uncomfortable as it already was, she turned to him and grateful to remember asking him about something.
“How did your date go?” She asked. This time, she saw him stiffened again. His gaze wavered before he completely looked away.
She asked for Chaerin’s help to find a woman for Youngbae. At first, she struggled to make him say yes to date but after a few days of pleading and teasing, he finally agreed only because, with his exact words: “You look stupid when you plead.” He said it with his coldest voice. Dara could only smile back in return.
“It was fine.” As brief as that. She gleamed. Though she expected a better answer, hearing him say “fine” was better than hearing nothing. She wanted to ask more, but the bell rang and he was already pushing away from his seat. She watched him as he went to her things and brought it to her. She could only roll her eyes and pout at him as she got her things.
“Is there going to be a second date?” She pushed as they made their way back to her building. Youngbae just shrugged his shoulder and didn’t answer which made her scowl at him. Once they reached the entrance, Youngbae stopped.
“Is everything okay with you and Jiyong?” He suddenly asked. She looked at him, wondering why he was suddenly asking her about this.
“Yes. Why?” She asked back. Youngbae shook his head, put his hands inside his pockets before he looked around with an annoyed look again.
“Nothing.” He answered. Dara became worried this time.
“Is everything alright?” Her voice was faltering. He turned his gaze back at her and at first she thought he was going to say something as his mouth parted only for him to close it again. He stared at her for a while before he let out a sigh.
“Is he going to fetch you later?”
“Yes.” She said with a nod.
“Good.” He nodded back. He was about to turn away when Dara called his name. He looked back at her and this time he flinched when he saw fear in Dara’s expression.
“What’s happening?” She mumbled and this time she became more aware of the voices around her. Something was definitely wrong that the people and Youngbae definitely have the knowledge of it except her and it brought something bitter inside her. Youngbae reached for her hand and pulled her away from the crowd.
“There are some talks… I don’t even know if they are true. I only learned it this morning. I don’t know if this should come from me or if you should talk to Jiyong first but on the other hand, I don’t want you to know it from others, especially from these people.” He said as he looked around. This made the ugly feeling inside her grew.
“Tell me.” She said firmly. Youngbae looked at her for a moment. His jaw was tightly clenched and he hesitated at first but in the end, gave up.
“Taeyeon’s pregnant and Jiyong’s might be the father.”
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Jiyong held his phone against his ear as he waited for Dara to answer her phone. She was probably done with her lunch by now and even though it’s only been hours since he last seen and talked to her, he was already longing to hear her voice.
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The deafening silence that suddenly passed between Youngbae and Dara broke with the sound of Dara’s phone. Her body jerked from the sound but she didn’t bother answering it. She was too distracted by the searing pain that plunged through her heart to even bother checking if it was her husband who’s calling. And as the pain passed, dizziness hit her and if not for Youngbae being there, holding her, she had probably collapsed on the ground.
“Dara, get a hold of yourself.” Youngbae whispered as he wrapped his arms around her and carefully walked her away from the crowd. Dara’s breath hitched and a choking sound escaped as she felt tears forming i
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