Trust Me, Baby
[SERIES] Trust Me, Baby
It was like hearing Santa Claus is coming or people telling you are going to heaven when you die. I wanted to jump up and down, hug him like there's no tomorrow and make him feel loved for carrying such a burden. He was lovely, blushing and full of hope. I was grateful, could die right there and then but didn't because I still want to hold my own child with my two hands. Life will finally be perfect.
It took more than a minute for the exciting news to sank in me. But, I suddenly realized. He was a boy. I did not mind that, at all. In fact, I'm thankful.
What scared me, was the word of promise Father gave.
"You've seen what happened to Donghae and Amber. You are my only child now and I warn you, keep him away if you don't want to see him buried beneath the Earth. Oh, no. I don't think he will get that honour too. Because I think I will be the one that have to drag him away. And I'm sure you don't want to see the creature he'll become."
My heart clenched and I toss away my soul out the window. I cannot even begin to imagine how I'd live without this boy. I'm such a cruel person for even considering the decision. Yes. I am a cruel, heartless person. I don't know how to appreciate love. I just can't bear to see him.. dissipate. Better off let him be, with another better man. And a promise of a better life.
The sound of light raindrops against the window drowns the memory I relished. Guess I dozed off standing. The impending steps of a person coming from the left room was proven when the door creaks open.
"Where were you?" I asked, aware of exactly who he is. Kevin sighs befor replying.
"Work."
"You're late." I said, trying to around and find the couch. He immediately comes to my side to aid me, settling me down on the comfy leather.
"There was a storm and there was the traffic. Do you need anything?" He offered.
My heart screams a name. I vowed not to say it out loud whenever Kevin asked me that question. It would only open up a wound not yet dried. I shook my head instead.
"Okay, I'm going for a shower then." He seems tired and his words are followed by small sighs. The small matter never passed me by everytime I realized it and I found myself halting him.
"Is something bothering you? Or are you keeping something from me?" I said, hand grabbing his wrist. I cannot see his face, but I can judge that he's quite shocked at the revelation.
"No. Nothing."
"You're not really a good liar, Kevin. Are you planning things again?" He pulls his hand from me.
"You're not gonna stop me this time. No, not anymore." He said confidently, almost driven by madness. He strodes away, not waiting even though I called after him.
I sigh. Recalling every attempt Kevin made to cure me. It isn't necessary. I'm dead already and soon this body will decay too. I'm almost thankful for that. It's a waste of time and I feel sorry for confining his life. If I didn't pull him together last time, he would be happy.
It was my fault Kevin is depressed. It was my fault Father is dissapointed.
It was my fault for making the one love of my life suffer.
I should die. I should just die.
**********
Okay I know it's short and I'm sorry for that. I wanted to write longer but I hadn't anytime these past weeks.... I promise I'll come back with new, better and much longer chapter. Things had been hectic around my life. I'm thankful enough I'm not dead. o_--
Comments