Violet

Sunday. I don’t even know how many hours I wasted last night before I went to sleep. Or whether I still cry in my sleep because I remember I had a horrible dream and I remember waking up wiping my tears few times over. The worst thing to wake up in the morning is to remember what I was trying to forget last night. Kai.

Then my fingers automatically goes to my neck, checking if the necklace he gave me is there. Hah, it’s still there. So it wasn’t a dream, the fight I had with him last night is not a dream. We’re over, we’re through, we’re done, and that’s the reality.

I check my phone, slightly hoping to see any new text messages. None. It’s 11.45 in the morning, and I’m still on my bed, feeling hopeless to even get out of it. I shake my head, trying to find a new courage. I heave a sigh, look straight into the ceiling above me, and I know I have to do to get away from all of this mess. The kids, in the hospital.

I take a shower, dress myself up and go downstair. When I see my mom in the kitchen, chatting with one of the maid, I approach them.

“Morning, mom.” I say. The maid and my mom stop talking and both turn their head to look at me.

“Ahhh honey, you’re finally awake.” My mom smiles at me. Sweetheart, she calls me sweetheart. Kai calls me sweetheart. No damn it, what am I thinking?

“Ahh yeah.” I stutter. “I’m going to the hospital, to look after the kids.” I tell her.

“Alright, are you going with Jong In?” My mom asks. No mom, I’m not going with Jong In. I’m not going anywhere with him anymore. Can the world please stop reminding me of one guy I wish to erase from my memory please?

“Nope, I’m just gonna go with our driver.” I reply and I fake a smile.

“Ohh is he busy today?” My mom asks again. Seriously, what is wrong with my mom.

“No, he’s not. Urm, I guess I have to go now. I’ll see you soon.” I walk closer to her and kiss her cheek.

When I arrive in the hospital, it’s the usual routine. I check the kid in the playroom, and see they’re all drawing something. Ji Hoon is there, but his hair is not there. He’s bald now. He must have been having his treatment this weekend. I stand by the door and watch them, until Ji Hoon’s head lift up and his eyes meet mine.

“V!!!!!!!!!” He shrieks at then he stands up and starts walking towards me. He’s not running, his condition must be in pretty bad now that he’s not running. I frown at the thought but still smile when he approaches me.

“Hello Ji Hoon.” I bend down and kiss his cheek.

“You’re here!” he says. All the other kids resume their drawing.

“Of course I’m here.” I tell him.

“I thought you’re not gonna come this week.” He says. I pat his head and run my hand through his scalp.

“What makes you think that?” I ask.

He shrugs at me. “I don’t know, Kai came just now, he bought us toys. But you were not with him, I thought you sent him to see us because you’re busy or something.” He tells me and I widen my eyes at the mention of Kai.

“Kai came?” I ask for confirmation. Sweet, just when I thought I can come to one place that can help me forget him, here I am talking about him.

“Yeahh he did, earlier this morning. In fact, he just left about an hour ago. When we asked him where are you, he said you might not be able to come, he said you’re in a difficult situation so he came instead.” Ji Hoon says. I don’t how to react to this. Kai came? Why?

“Oh and do you know what he bought me? A remote control airplane!” He talks with his eyes widen, like he’s really excited about it.

“I thought you don’t like him?” I ask Ji Hoon.

“I didn’t at first, but I think I like him now.” Ji Hoon answers. Hah, why does that sounds familiar.

“Why? Because he bought you an airplane?” I ask. 

“Yes, and because how he smiled when we started asking about you.” Ji Hoon answers. What the hell? This boy is only 6 why is he talking like this? Seriously, this boy must have been watching too many romantic movies. And who the hell even let him? “Oh and please bring me to the garden, I want to try the airplane. Please please please.” He pleads. Right, like there’s way in hell and heaven I can resist this boy.

“Arghhh I don’t think I know how to control this thing!” Ji Hoon nags. He’s right, the airplane only last in the air for about 5 seconds then it starts to fly really weirdly and next thing we know it’s already on the grass. There are not many people in the garden, just