When Kai and Professor Oh re-enter the classroom, they are met with a flurry of questions.

 

    “Did you report her?” Kris whispers. “I feel kind of bad...,”

 

    “I didn’t,” Kai responds, causing Baekhyun and Kyungsoo’s mouths to fall open in surprise. “I just... scared her a bit. The other guy she was with left.”

 

“Professor Oh, who was that guy?” Hwe Ji preens. “He was really good-looking. Whoa, is he your boyfriend?”

 

“I think I heard you calling him oppa,” Do Mi gasps. “He is so attractive.”

 

“How did Professor Oh get a guy that hot?” someone whispers, and half the class starts tittering. Professor Oh clenches her teeth and crosses her arms. How disgusting, she thinks. It is extremely weird to hear the female population fawn over Sehun; worse, they are speculating that Hana is Sehun’s girlfriend. Ew.

 

    Kai cannot focus the entire day. He is constantly plagued by thoughts of Hana. His cruelty. How many times has he seen her anguished expression? How many times has she pleaded with him? And he relentlessly tormented her for causing Sehun’s depression....

 

    But she was going through the same pain as well.

 

    Sehun and Hana are almost done unpacking in Kai’s loft.

 

    “I’ll get that for you,” Kai tells Hana, gently taking a heavy box from her arms. Hana throws him a bewildered look.

 

    “Uh, there’s really no need,” she says, shifting the box in her hands. “I got it.”

 

    And she walks away.

 

    “You’re being exceptionally nice to Hana,” Sehun remarks. “Is it because you found out about our parents... and what she tried to do?”

 

    Kai sighs. “Yeah.” He doesn’t tell Sehun the full story- that the reason he is so guilty is because he blackmailed and hurt Hana so viciously.

 

    And after all she’s done for me... I don’t deserve any of it.

 

---

 

    Hana groggily stumbles through the hallways Kai’s apartment, heading for the kitchen. It is some godforsaken hour of the night. For some reason, Hana is extremely thirsty. Why do I need water now?, she groans in her head, yawning widely.

 

    When Hana reaches the kitchen, however, she realizes that she is not the only one awake. Kai is sitting on the sofa, tapping away on a laptop. Stacks of papers and mountains of 3-ring binders are scattered all around him. He is hard at work.

 

    “What are you doing up?” Hana asks sleepily. When Kai hears her voice, he nearly leaps out of his skin.

 

    “H-Hana?” he stutters, hurriedly throwing his laptop to the side. “What are you doing up? Do you need anything? I can get you anything, really. Should I make you some milk and honey?”

 

    Hana shakes her head. “There’s no need. I just needed water.”

 

    “Are you sure?” Kai’s eyes get even wider, if possible. “Did you have a nightmare? Do you want me to-,”

 

    “Jongin!” Hana exclaims, slamming a hand down on the marble countertop. “I’m fine!”

 

    Kai goes silent.

 

    “Are you okay?” Hana asks, furrowing her eyebrows. “You’ve been acting really strangely towards me lately. Is this another one of your practical jokes?”

 

    “No,” Kai murmurs.

 

    Hana purses her lips. “Then what is it? I appreciate the kind treatment, but this isn’t you-,”

 

    And suddenly she freezes. Her eyes widen in realization.

 

    “It’s because I told you about my depression,” Hana says monotonously.

 

Kai does not say anything.

 

“Am I right, Jongin?”

 

“Yes,” Kai says, his voice soft.

 

Hana sighs. “Jongin. Don’t. Don’t act that way towards me. I told you that I’m fine now. Just treat me normally-,”

 

“How can I treat you normally when I’ve made life hell for you?” Kai hisses. “I’ve done horrible, horrible things to you. I blamed you for Sehun’s situation. But you two... you two are the same. I should have helped you. But instead I-,”

 

Kai’s eyes widen as Hana places a single finger on his lips. “Shh,” she whispers. “We’re going to wake Sehun.”

 

Gradually, Kai’s face softens.

 

“Let’s sit down,” Hana suggests, leading him over to his couch. She pushes papers and folders out of the way. “What are you working on, anyway?”

 

“Company stuff,” Kai replies dismissively. “It’s... nothing much.”

 

“You shouldn’t work this late in the night,” Hana chastises gently. “It’s not good for your health.”

 

Kai shakes his head. “Whatever. Now let’s talk about you. What can I do to make it up to you?”

 

Hana hugs her knees to her chest, leaning back against the sofa. “You’re an , Jongin. But... I really don’t want anything else. You’ve said sorry a million times.”

 

“But why? Why don’t you want anything else?”

 

“I just don’t, okay?” Hana cannot explain the strange feeling inside of her. The feeling that everything is at peace. Somehow, Hana does not want to disrupt her relationship with Kai; she feels as if him trying to give her favors and other things would be extremely bizarre. Ingeniune. Uncomfortable.

 

“Hana.” Kai leans over on the sofa. He places a hand on her arm, and Hana is reminded of the time when she brought pizza over to Kai’s apartment after his business meeting. She recalls the furious, smoldering expression on his face as he thundered into the penthouse... and then the sudden dissolution of his anger as he saw her eating the pizza. Hana recalls with a shudder how Kai forced her to play that awful “Fact-O-Rama” game afterwards. Horrible.

 

“What is it?” Hana inquires.

 

“Talk to me about it,” he says. “I talked to you about my mother. You talk to me about your feelings. Please. Let me... let me try to understand you, or help you. Talking it out really helped Sehun.”

 

That’s what Sehun said this morning, Hana recalls rather irritably. Why does everyone keep insisting for me to “talk”? What am I, a whiny little teenager who gripes about her pathetic life issues to all her friends?

 

Wait. I am a teenager. Oh.

 

Hana looks at Kai. Half of his face is illuminated in the moonlight shining through his window, throwing his eyes and cheeks into sharp relief. Even through the dim glow, Hana can see the tender expression in Kai’s eyes, the way his lips draw into a concerned pout.

 

. He really is gorgeous, Hana thinks reproachfully, and the next thing she knows, she has launched into her story.

 

How her parents pushed her to be number 1, how she isolated herself from all of her friends. How Sehun despised the attention she always received. How her parents applied to MIT without her knowledge, and practically forced her to attend.

 

Her nightmares. Her struggle for independence. Her fight to overcome the suffocating hand of repression that had been clamped over her neck.

 

Pressure. Grades. Jobs. Honor. Success. Focus. Studying. Screaming.

 

Hana tells Kai how cutting was supposed to be something secretive, something small that would give her moments of pleasure. Her parents controlled everything about her life, but Hana could control everything about her body.

 

She had the power to make these scratches, to carve these thin slivers into her skin and watch her crimson blood trickle down her arm in spherical beads. Hana became addicted to the feeling of her razor cutting into her flesh, became addicted to tracing the scars on her body and reveling in the fact that her parents could not do anything about these, she had made them, she controlled her body, she was in power.

 

But then her parents announced that they were securing a high-paying job with Samsung, Inc. for her, and that she would be starting work in a month. “It’ll be in California, so we’ll be moving there next week!” they announced, plastering satisfied smiles on their faces.

 

That was the final straw.

 

Hana’s parents found her in the bathtub that night, lying facedown in her own blood.

 

That is when they allowed her to return to Seoul.

 

Hana has no idea why tears are running down her cheeks.

 

“Wow. Why am I crying?” she says in a gruff tone, trying not to sniffle. Hana hurriedly wipes away her tears with the sleeve of her pajamas. “I’m okay, really. I’ve gotten over it.”

 

Suddenly, she feels herself being pulled into a crushing, warm embrace.

 

“What are you doing, Jongin?” Hana protests, attempting to wriggle out of Kai’s grasp. “Let go-,”

 

“Cry,” Kai whispers. “Just cry.”

 

Hana sits absolutely still for a few moments.

 

And then a sob bursts through her lips.

 

Kai’s arms become wet with Hana’s tears.

 

“It’s okay,” Kai whispers, kissing the top of Hana’s head over and over again. “It’s okay, Hana. Just let it all go. I’m here.”

 

And Hana gladly accepts Kai’s warmth. It finally feels like someone is listening to her, someone is actually there for her. All notions of strength and keeping a straight face fly out of her mind as she continues weeping in Kai’s arms.

 

“It hurt,” Hana sobs. “It still hurts. I feel empty inside sometimes, like a robot. Like some little doll that’s only used for display. Something to brag about. I don’t feel like a real person.”

 

Kai buries his faces in Hana’s hair, pulling her even closer to his chest. “I know how you feel, Hana,” he says quietly. “I know the sensation of not really mattering to anyone, of just being some pawn that’s expected to do everything told of them and succeed greatly. It’s stressful and painful, and sometimes you don’t even feel human.”

 

“But Hana,” he continues, “you are a hilarious, outspoken, kind girl who can own people at tennis while cooking up some great ramen. Your cereal-making skills are out of this world, and even though you’re no Julia Lipnitskaia, you kick serious . And on top of it all, you’re a great sister to Sehun, and an amazing friend.”

 

When Hana hears the word friend, her eyes widen.

 

“Do you... do you really think I’m your friend?” Hana hiccups softly. A hopeful expression is alight on her face.

 

Kai grins. “Of course you’re my friend, silly. I didn’t dig up a garden with you, nearly puke soju on you, and drive around the entire city of Seoul looking for you just to be some random guy you know.”

 

Despite her tears, Hana giggles. In that moment, Kai is convinced that Hana is the most beautiful thing he has ever seen in her life.

“Thank you, Jongin,” she murmurs, wrapping her arms around his neck. “Thank you so, so much.”

---

A/N: Ahh they're finally, officially friends. This chapter was so refreshing to write LOL. Now to go talk about Yoojin and Suho... and get through the , which is coming up soon

I think I need to wrap up this story quickly. I think I'm losing inspiration for this story- that's why the last few chapters have been so disjointed and random and filler-y :/ I'm sorry!! But I will definitely give you guys a good ending.