Letter

I was looking through some boxes, 

And I happened to see your old letters. 

As the years passed, 

I forgot that I still had them. 

I used to call them my treasure. 

I had read each one so many times, 

But I had forgotten them all. 

It was easier that way. 

Now, looking at all your letters, 

They make my heart ache still.

How long had it been? 

When was the last time you gave me a letter? 

Ah, your last letter, 

The very one that I treasured the most. 

My heart still ache looking at all these letters.

They are the only thing left of you.

I can't make myself open them.

A flood of emotions would come over me. 

And yet I can't throw them away, 

Or much less destroy them. 

I know in my head it's probably the best, 

But still I can not do it. 

I should have a ceremony or something, 

I should send you on your way. 

I am probably holding you back. 

 I should read it one last time, 

Go through each one of them. 

Let the old me resurface once again, 

Claim me from your old letters. 

I should let you go, 

I know that I should, 

I should unshackle myself, 

Take the key and open the padlock. 

I know that when I let you go, 

I would set myself free. 

With a shaky hand, 

As tears start in the rim of her eyes,

She takes the letter farthest from her, 

The very first letter he wrote her. 

She takes a very deep breath, 

Trying to find the courage, 

Trying to quiet the voice in her head, 

Trying to stop the quiver in her heart.

She is debating with herself, 

She is trying to convince her old self, 

That this must be done, 

It is for their own good. 

They should stop being buried in the box, 

They should allow the time to continue ticking, 

They should start living once again. 

They should look forward to tomorrow, 

They should stop just existing and not living, 

They should grab life by the throat, 

And force it in their veins. 

She's hyperventilating, 

Her heart pounding so loudly.

She closes her eyes, 

Looking for courage to find her. 

Tears cascading down her cheeks, 

Sniffling the pain exploding in her heart, 

Breathing through her lips.

Slowly, she opens her eyes,

Looking everywhere,

But not at the letter in her hand.

 She knows that they must be determined to do this, 

For both their sake. 

She knew that it was time, 

To bury the old memories with these letters, 

To bury the yesteryear with him. 

Slowly she looks at the letter and slowly opens it. 

 Writer's note: Composed March 5, 2017

A story in my mind