Chapter Twenty-Six

"What are you doing to me?"

30th of January 2015

“We’re good to go,” Hee Young announced as she shoved Kai in the car while she jogged around the car to sit on the other side of the passenger’s seat. Mrs. Lim laughed, looking over her shoulder to see Kai grunting in pain, his hands still clutching onto his abdomen as if he got stabbed. “Yah, Kai, are you okay?”

“Nope,” Kai groaned, opening his eyes weakly to glare at Hee Young, “This brat just tried to break my ribcage.”

Mr. Kang snorted and revved up the engine before he took off, “I think you’re just over exaggerating,”

Kai huffed and sat up properly, “I think you all are just biased towards her.”

“Know your territory, idiot.” Hee Young muttered lowly, scrolling through her messages and found out that Minseok had literally looked like he was crying for help. He had sent her at least five text messages and Kai didn’t even bothered to tell her about it.

She glanced at his way when Mr. Kang and Mrs. Lim were immersed in their own conversation, leaving the two at the back to talk about whatever they wished.

“Yah,” She called out for him, nudging him by the knee. He still was rubbing on his stomach, his chest and down to his torso, glancing at her now, “What?”

“Minseok texted me a few times and you didn’t even tell me?”

Kai’s face looked like he wasn’t surprised – as if he knew about this.

Then again, he knew.

“That girl is going to be the death of me.” Kai breathed out as he stood outside by the convenient store with another huge bottle of cold water in his hands. He felt her phone vibrating in his pocket again and he fished it out to light up the screen. Even though he wasn’t able to unlock her phone, he could see briefly who the message was from and the first line of the text message.

‘Hey, are you okay? Or are you just not in the mood to reply me?’
2.32p.m. || Min

Min? His eyebrow cocked up, noticing how there were already about four text messages in line from the same person.

Min… Minseok...

Kai had put the pieces together, raising an eyebrow a bit on how many times Minseok had texted Hee Young. He was about to put the phone away, into his pocket but another vibration had halted him from doing so. He looked at the screen, noticing there was a new message… from Minseok.

‘If you need someone to talk to, remember I’m here, okay? My dorm is your dorm, my ears are yours too. J’
2.34p.m. || Min

Kai whistled lowly and finally decided to just put her phone back into his pocket, his head shaking, “God damn Minseok… you text her way too many times.”

Kai shrugged it off and walked back towards the campus, twisting open the bottle cap of the bottle he was holding as he thought; I wonder if she really does reply all of his messages… Oh well. She doesn’t need to know yet. Well… technically she’s ‘mine’ for now. She shouldn’t need to be occupied in her mind by someone else.

At least, that made sense to him.

He looked at her and then at her phone before looking away, “I don’t need to tell you.”

She was this close to hitting him again but she couldn’t when Mrs. Lim called her name out in such a loving tone. Hee Young lowered her fist, putting her phone aside as she responded to Mrs. Lim, “Yeah?”

“I heard about…-“

Great. What else did she find out now.

“The dinner thing...?”

Hee Young stared at Mr. Kang through the rear mirror and he could only shrug, unsure of how she found out in the first place.

“And…?” Hee Young continued, wondering what else Mrs. Lim would like to find out.

Kai merely looked out of the window but definitely, he was all ears.

“Are you going?”

Mrs. Lim tried her best to look over her shoulder, meeting with Hee Young’s eyes that suddenly had the urge to look out of the window. Kai glanced over to Hee Young, noticing how she got quiet all of the blue. Kai nudged her by the arm, “Yah, she asked a question-“

“I know,” She snapped, shutting him up and he was at lost for words. Her tone said another different story and he doesn’t even know if he had the authority to find out. He glanced at Mr. Kang through the mirror and he did a sign or mouthed something that made Kai shut up.

Hee Young turned her head to look out of the window, mumbling softly, “I don’t know.”

And that practically summarizes how everything went down in the car ride.

Hee Young sat there by the one place she prefers to be at apart from the balcony. The place was rather quiet as it was right outside her dorm, pretty much by the window with a seat conveniently by it for her to sit on. With her head rested against the wall behind her and with her jacket on to keep her warm, she couldn’t help but just think.

There were so much going on right now, she sort of regretted things a bit.

There’s the dinner, the final play in which she wasn’t so certain of yet, her dance assignment with Kai. Not to mention, Minseok was pretty much around here and there too along with-

“You know, I’m starting to think that you prefer to be alone all the time,” A voice spoke up, making her almost cringe at who it was. Or at least, she had already had a hint on who it was. She didn’t even bother to turn to face him as she remained staring out of the window, her eyes fixed to the stars above her. It just made her feel so bad staring at the pretty stars on her own but then again, who knows that he could’ve been a star all along and God just needed the brightest star back by his side.

He swallowed when she didn’t answer him and he sort of felt guilty.

Call him crazy but yes. He felt guilty; he’s a human with feelings, too.

He decided to slowly take a seat opposite her as the seat by the window was built for two. He held one knee up while she had two of her knees propped up as she hugged them closely, her bracelet sparkling to his eyes. Before he could ask what that meant to her, he said, “Look… about earlier… I want to apologize for-“

“What did she say?” She asked, cutting him in between and honestly, he didn’t expect that.

He expected something in between, “You rude bastard,” or even, “Do you have no manners at all?” – which would both mean the same thing, actually. He blinked at her and his head bobbed forward, needing to hear her words again to confirm what he had just heard initially, “W-What?”

She turned to look at him this time and her eyes said something more than just ‘I’m tired’ or ‘I just want to know’. It said something more; her eyes had a deeper meaning.

“What did she say to you?”

Kai reached up to scratched the back of his head as he leaned back against the wall behind him, recalling back the words of her mother, “S-She said she needed to talk to you urgently and that she’ll try to call you again if possible.”

Hee Young shook her head and her soft laugh came off as sarcastic, he could tell that. She wasn’t laughing because this was funny but because it was too ironic, if he could read her properly. She took a deep intake of air before she breathed out, “She never stops trying…” Her eyes looked out of the window once again, glancing up to the stars.

He decided to lift up his other leg, folding both legs up on the seat before he held onto both of his knees together as he stared at her, “What happened, between the two of you…?”

He knew it was a sensitive question but he had to just throw it out there. Curiosity killed the cat, yes?

Well cat has nine lives – if he can handle the beatings she’d give him, he can handle losing one life.

She glanced at him, noticing he was dead serious and if anything was discussed now, it wouldn’t be made fun of. Also, she could take note of how his eyes seemed concern; a look she never really expected to see in a long while now. Not to mention, she already felt like he was somewhat different and same compared to the past – so anything she would tell him couldn’t possibly change a thing.

“It’s complicated,” Her voice was monotonous and her eyes still busy staring at the stars.

“Not if you try to explain,” He challenged.

“It’s a long story,” She turned to look at him.

“I have time.” He countered, causing her to narrow her eyes at him, “You don’t take ‘no’ as an answer, do you?”

No, her mind answered too soon before he said, “Of course, not.”

Although it took her a while and even though he could see she was struggling to place her words together, he managed to be patient and wait. There was nothing much for him to do at his dorm, either. Kyungsoo would bug him for not finding for her to apologize because apparently, stealing someone’s phone temporarily and calling it as ‘borrow’ whilst answering unknown calls for someone was ‘wrong’ and ‘it could be charged as illegal acts’ according to Kai’s roommate. Not being able to stand Kyungsoo’s motherly rambles, Kai decided to just leave the dorm and randomly walk around the corridors to clear his mind.

Little did he know, his small instincts led him here.

“My mom sort of has alcoholic problems,” She started out strong, firm and nowhere near showing she was cracking.

Kai scoffed with a smirk, raising an eyebrow, “Sort of?”

She turned to look at him with a look of honesty, “She was pretty messed up, alright?”

Kai found this chance to laugh at her tone, noticing how she easily said those words. However, a minute past and he noticed how she laughed along with him earlier on had faded away, replaced with a look of solemnness that he couldn’t explain – he just didn’t like that look.

“Because of that, I ran away from home.”

Kai furrowed his eyebrows, leaning forward as his back pushed away from the wall, “You can’t just run away because your mother has alcoholic problems. Couldn’t you work-?”

“She went too far, alright?”

“How far?”

The shattering of glass could be heard as it echoed in the whole house, accompanied by heavy breathing and a few curses here and there. It was pitch black in the house but what made it worse is that Hee Young could tell what was in the darkness surrounding her.

She wanted to run, she wanted to escape this but a part of her kept telling her that her mother was the one of the two family members she had left.

If she ran away from the one out of two people left she called as family, how will that turn out?

She didn’t want to be alone – she feared to be alone. Losing her little brother was one thing and losing her father was another. Having her sister live aboard was another toll on her but the fact that her mother would not change her alcoholic habits was one thing as well.

But it gotten worse – that was another.

She stared up to what she could call her mother, her eyes teary as she got on her knees, “M-Mom! Please stop drinking! Y-You’ve had too many bottles!”

What she feared was that chuckle – that chuckle that didn’t belong to her mother. The alcohol was swimming in her mother’s mind and she knew that her mother could not think straight – let alone remember who she would call as her own daughter.

“And who the are you – telling me not to drink?”

The sixteen year old remained at her knees, her hands reaching to hold onto her mother’s leg, “P-Please! Just stop! Please stop!”

“You disgusting child!” A voice shrieked and Hee Young could hear that her mother could’ve possibly broken the end of a bottle. She didn’t know how or Hee Young had no idea if this was a force from God but she had the instinct to shield herself, turning her body sideways until she felt a painful, piercing feeling on her shoulder. She let out a scream but the woman who stood before her could only laugh.

With a whimpered sob, the girl moved away on the floor, her words cold as she said, “Fine! Drink however much you want and see if I care!”

She flinched and pressed her back against the cabinet behind her when she heard another glass bottle breaking – her mother must’ve dropped it.

Another bottle broken.

“As if I needed your ing permission. Don’t disturb me.”

Hee Young was certain as she weakly got up, avoiding her mother who sluggishly lied on the sofa with a bottle in her grip. She took out her bag and her other hand clutched onto her shoulder, feeling the blood seep through as she tried her best to pack. She took everything necessary and she hated how not only blood dripped onto the floor but also her tears.

When she finally had her bag packed, she hastily got out through the window, painfully yet successfully climbing down the useful ladder by her window built in the wall as she climbed down. Once she had her bag over her other shoulder whilst holding onto the shoulder she managed to wrap with a piece of cloth to halt the bleeding, she ran – and she ran fast.

Her feet took her further away from the place she used to call home and she didn’t look back once as she continued to run.

Whatever it is, she ran with a certain thought in mind and it stuck by her ever since.

That’s not my home and I’m not coming back. I’m sorry, father, Joon and unnie – but I can’t take it anymore.

And I won’t.

She clicked her tongue, unsure if she should show this but she saw that challenging look in his eyes, as if he feared nothing. She could see how wide his eyes went when she ped her jacket, lowering it down until he could see her shoulders. She turned her body a bit and he could see her shoulder she allowed him to see that was exposed under the moonlight that shone through. His lips gaped apart, unable to blink at the scar that was evident – it looks painful just looking at it.

She covered her scar with her jacket before zipping it back up, leaning back against the wall with her eyes giving him a look, “Satisfied?”

He shook his head with his eyes giving her a look of pity, a look with the sense of sadness in it, “W-Where did you run away to?”

She sighed and rested her back against the wall once more, her eyes looking up to his, “Take a guess.”

He furrowed his eyebrows at her for a second, taking one moment to think as he looked away. It did take him a while and he had first thought that she’d go to Minseok – for sure. However, something just made him say, “Mr… Mr. Kang?”

She nodded slowly and gave a small smile, “You’re pretty smart.”

He ignored her compliment (although they were rare to come by) as he said, “What about your sister?”

She clicked her tongue and glanced down on her bracelet, fiddling with it as she said, “She was aboard focusing on her studies.”

He tilted his head a bit out of confusion, “Didn’t she know any of this? If she did, I’m sure she wouldn’t have left-“

“She didn’t know when she left.” Hee Young started to explain clearer, looking up again to meet with Kai’s confused gaze, “She didn’t know… ‘she’ had a drinking problem that was until that extend. And sure as hell she didn’t know about it until... recently.”

 “Young-ah… We can’t keep avoiding them forever.”

Hee Young leaned her back against the chair, staring back at her sister, “Yes we can.”

Minseok his lips nervously, reaching to pat Hee Young’s shoulder, “H-Hee Young,-“

“And how long are we going to keep doing that? They were so nice to us!”

Minseok retreated his hand, turning to look at Hee Min, “N-Noona-“

“They’re trying to make up for the years they abandoned us!” Hee Young got up from her chair, “And if it wasn’t us, it was me, then. You and I both know she didn’t give a in trying to find me.” Minseok tried to hold onto Hee Young’s hand, tugging her down, “Hee Young, please-“

Hee Young snatched her hand back, her voice lowering down and Hee Min saw that Hee Young… she threatened to cry. Hee Min genuinely forgot just how hard it was on Hee Young.

“She didn’t care about us, about Joon and not even a single about dad.”

She pulled her bag as she stood up, looking at her sister, “You don’t get it, unnie.” She shook her head as she clicked her tongue, pushing her chair back, “You just don’t get it.”

Kai blinked at her a few times, letting it all sink in as he stared at her; he didn’t exactly know what to say at this point. One minute he wants to know more but in the next, he doesn’t know if his mind can process the kind of life she’s been living. And for her to actually keep shut about this? That was something not many people can do because as humans, we do need to let it all out to someone.

Then again, the thought of her telling this all to Minseok crossed his mind; maybe that’s why Minseok wants to protect her so much; she’s been through so much.

“I told you, it was complicated.” She chuckled, shaking her head as she got up from the seat. As she walked past him, standing in front of her door, he stood up and turned around to face her back. Her hand lingered on the doorknob as she glanced over her shoulder to see him standing behind her, not leaving just yet.

“Go on in, princess. The world is dangerous.”

She turned around to give him a look, “You know, my name isn’t ‘princess’.”

He casually slipped his hands into his pockets, “Maybe I like calling you that-“ He saw her eyes widening and heck, his eyes widened too. “-Look I don’t care, alright? Just go in already.”

With a scoff and possibly the rolling of her eyes, she turned back around and twisted the doorknob open to step through. Once she stepped into her dorm, she faced him, a distance away as he stood there, not looking at her.

“Yah,” She called out, causing him to glance back at her way, expecting something- “Thank you.”

He stood there with sealed lips and a slight nod to acknowledge her words before she closed the door.

He remained staring at the door as if he could recall the way she actually looked at him decently. He exhaled deeply and slumped himself back on the seat, pressing his back against the wall behind him. He rubbed his face with both hands, feeling his heart race as he groaned, “What are you doing to me?”