Chapter 42 - Incomplete Desires

Mistress of My Heart

            Jinli walked into the room after Daehyun was done showering. He was lounging on the bed, on his laptop and looked up when she walked in. It was a Wednesday morning, and yet it felt like a weekend. It was the first time she has seen him look so relaxed. He patted the empty space next to him. She paused and he smiled. “Join me.”

            Tentatively, as if she had no right to, she slid onto the bed. They were never in such deliberate close proximity before. He threw the covers over her legs and turned to her. “Want to help me? I hear you have a way with words. Weren’t you going to be an author if you weren’t an interior designer?”

            Jinli laughed a little. “Someone’s been digging up my history. What are you, a stalker?”

            “Surely a husband should know something about his wife.”

            Usually the comment would rile her up but she told herself that she had to keep her eyes on the prize. She had to break his heart, and if him opening up to her was a way to do it, then so be it. And for once there was something non-malicious about his tone. “So, what did you do? Raided through my childhood closet? Contacted all of my old school friends?”

            “I asked Lili.” This answer was surprising. And Daehyun saw it. He grinned. “You thought your best friend would never give away your secrets, did you? Well, you’d be surprised. She also told me that,” and he put the laptop aside and leaned in close to her, “you only stopped wetting the bed at age twelve.

            “Ya, you’re so annoying.” She playfully pushed him and he chuckled. He planted his arm on her other side so that his torso was hovering over her and stared at her. Jinli’s breath caught. Damn, he was so beautiful. So cruel, but so beautiful. She glanced down at his full lips before catching herself and refocused on his eyes again. But his eyes were just as mesmerizing.

            “What are you going to do about it?” He was giving her a slightly cocky stare.

            Confidence, Jinli. Confidence. She cleared . “Nothing at the moment. It’s not worth my time.”

            Daehyun laughed again and settled back against his pillow. This gave her room to breathe and recover, even if his scent lingered in front of her. “In all seriousness, how did you learn to make that soup so well?”

            “You’d learn too if your father came home drunk at least once a week.”

            He reached out tentatively for her hand. “It must have been hard on you.”

            Jinli shrugged. “It’s okay. I got through it. And now I’m an adult and he’s still just as successful. Speaking of which, have you figured what’s going on with the company?” She didn’t want to bring up something so negative, but she also wanted to show concern. So she watched him carefully.

            “I need your help. I need to hold a conference tomorrow. And I’d like you to look at my speech. I have some of it written. And then I’ll need some time to work things out with Junhong and Himchan-Hyung. Do you want to do something in the afternoon?”

            “Do your work. I have a project myself.”

            “No, I’m serious. It’s not even noon right now. We can work and then at three, let’s go out. Where do you want to go?” Daehyun was looking at her earnestly. “We can go to the amusement park, or the aquarium, or wherever you want. Or we can do something private, if you prefer that.”

            She gave him a small smile. “Surprise me.”

            Working with Daehyun was comfortable. Several times, when she glanced over at him, she had to remind herself that this was all for a greater good. She had to bring him down. Once or twice, he would look up and his eyebrows would unfurl from their tense concentration as he smiled at her.

            “I know I’m good looking, but you don’t have to stare in such an agape way. Close your mouth or come here and let me do it.”

            Despite her better intentions, his words still made her cheeks burn. “Go away. You’re so annoying.”

            “And you’re not denying that you were gawking.”

            “I thought you needed my help? I was looking to see if you needed my service.”

            Daehyun laughed, and somewhere in the back of her mind, she wondered why their marriage couldn’t always be like this. “Do you want to come back over here or shall I go over to you?” But even as he was saying this, he was getting off the bed and wandering to her desk.

            “Wow,” he breathed as he looked at her sketches. “You’re pretty good.”

            It was the first time he has ever shown any interest in her career. He a couple of patterns and turned to you. “How are you going to add the polka dots to this all-white living room?”

            “With a couple of throws here and there. The point is to emphasize the white, so we may go with black dots rather than other colors because the color will stand out more than the black.” It was disconcerting to be talking about her rather than him. “So, let me see what you have.”

            She had never been permitted access to his computer before. Restraint kept her eyes from wandering over the screen to see any telltale evidence of Hyosung. When he switched windows, she saw that his background was of his friends. They worked for a few more hours before he tugged the laptop lid down.

            “Let’s head out.”

            “Where are we going?”

            “It’s a surprise. Get dressed. Something nice, but you don’t have to go all out.” She waited a few beats for him to leave while he stared at her in confusion. It took him a few seconds but then he laughed. “You want me to leave? Nope, sorry. I have to change too. Don’t worry. I won’t peek.” But the way he peered up at her from under his lashes made her question the truthfulness of his statement.

            Jinli stood up and forced confidence. “Fine. Maybe you can tell me if whatever I’m wearing is appropriate or not.”

            Daehyun opened up her closet and stood with his fingers on his chin. “Hmm, I like this one.” He reached up and pulled out a flattering navy dress. “This is comfortable right?”

            She eyed the keyhole neckline. “It’s going to be pretty revealing.”

            The moment she said those words, she regretted them. Daehyun turned his head to look at her. His eyes went from her face straight down to her chest and she fought the urge to cross her arms. This was not the usual cursory sweep that he did in contempt. Instead, there was something about his gaze that made her feel like he was caressing her, but also possessing her. His tongue came out to his lips before he spoke. “I like this one.” Magically, his voice has gone down an octave.

            “Hand it over.” She silently applauded herself for keeping her composure. Her hand shook, however, when their fingers touched as he passed her the dress.

            While Daehyun was putting on a black dress shirt, she stepped out of her clothes and was glad that she had the foresight to wear nice underwear. The dress required a strapless bra and she took off the one she had on. It was at that moment she saw in the side mirror that Daehyun was watching her.       

            At first, she was casual, pretending that she hadn’t noticed. Her heart was pounding in her ears as she tried to translate the look in his eyes. It was different from the cold cruelty she was used to by now, and the congenial warmth that sometimes showed on good days. This was fire. Not even when he flirted with her had she seen this. Was this how he looked at Hyosung? The thought steeled her resolve once more. She had to bring him down.

            As her hands went behind her to clasp the tiny hooks, she allowed their eyes to meet in the reflection. His expression was devoid of any laughter. In fact, he looked serious. His eyes didn’t leave hers even as she moved to put on the dress. When she finally had it on, Daehyun walked up behind her and replaced her hands in helping her zip it up.

            There was something beautiful about the image in the mirror. They were two dark figures standing one in front of the other. He was much taller than she was and there was a protective stance to which he stood behind her. His hands, now completed with their task, strayed to her waist and to her arm. Jinli tilted her head a little and he his lips again. Daehyun bent his head to her ear. “Beautiful. I knew I chose well.” He pressed his lips to her temple and stepped away.

            The tension between the two of them was palpable. She felt that if she even raised her fingertips, she would be able to pop it, letting the pent up desire spill out. He bent to retrieve his suit jacket before walking out of the room. “Let’s go.”

            They first pulled up to a jewelry store and he took her hand, walking in confidently to a certain section. Daehyun smiled at the saleswoman behind the counter. “I’m looking for something that my wife can wear on a daily basis. Something both elegant and durable.”

            He turned to her. “Do you prefer necklaces or bracelets?”

            Jinli in a breath. “Bracelets.” It was unthinkable, Daehyun buying her jewelry.

            The lady returned with trays of options. He glanced over them and picked up a chain with a diamond encrusted star. “Do you like this one?”

            She held it in her fingers. “It’s so delicate. I’m afraid I might break it.”

            “All of our bracelets are made with the finest white gold. They are guaranteed to be strong.”

            “I’ll take it.” He was unhesitant and it was only after he clasped the chain around her wrist and walked out the door that Jinli allowed herself to ask him why.

            “Aside from the wedding ring, I haven’t given you any jewelry. This one looks nicer than your other ones. I’d like you to wear it.” It was his hint that she shouldn’t wear the one Taewoon gave her.

            “Thank you.”

            Daehyun shrugged. “It suits you. Are you ready to go for dinner?”

            Something had changed and Jinli couldn’t put her finger on it. What had started as a lighthearted day has suddenly taken a more serious turn. And she wasn’t quite sure she liked it. She hated that she couldn’t read him. The restaurant was a fancy one and she couldn’t help but feel slightly disappointed by the dark ambiance. Suddenly, things felt less personal.

            The hostess led them away from the din and towards the back of the restaurant. She opened up sliding bamboo doors and bowed. “Please enter.”

            Daehyun finally smiled as he settled down on the seat. “You didn’t think I would have you out there for all the world to ogle at, did you?”

            Feeling much relieved at both the privacy and the return of his playfulness, Jinli rolled her eyes to the ceiling. “Please. Nobody was looking.”

            “Correction; I’d like to be the only one looking.”

            She was dressed too elegantly for another eye roll so she opted for a tiny laugh instead. “You’re so ridiculous.”

            Daehyun merely smiled and held up the menu. “Do you want to see what you want, or would you rather I ordered?” Jinli indicated for him to order and he did when the waiter came. Then they settled into silence.

            “I’m going to have to do a company-wide investigation and your father will be involved. I just want to apologize in advance for any discomfort you will probably feel.” He said it gingerly, as if he had been there for all of the humiliating conversations between her and her father. “Mr. Cho wasn’t exactly very pleased when I first told him that there were problems on his side of the company.”

            “Don’t worry. You do what you need to do. I can deal with his temper.”

            There was still a slightly worried look on his face. “Why is the relationship between you and your father so broken?”

            Jinli shrugged. “I think it’s the pressure of being a single parent. He took my mother’s death pretty hard and threw himself into working. And I was only nine at the time. I guess leaving me with a nanny was enough. And I never really saw him. Time passed and he realized I was grown up, and a good pawn for his power hungry ways.” She clasped a hand over . “Oh, my bad. I didn’t mean it that way.”

            By now their food had arrived and she was hoping that would serve as a distraction. Instead, Daehyun smiled. “If you’re referring to our marriage, it’s no hidden secret. I’m sorry it hasn’t exactly been what it should have been. But I’m enjoying getting to know you better. I hope you feel the same.”

            His arms reached forward to cut her steak for her. Jinli was quiet as she stared at him, trying to decide what the proper response would be. A part of her was disappointed that he made it so platonic. She decided honesty would be the way to go.

            “I do admit, this has been nothing I imagined. And I wasn’t expecting too much. But there has been progress.”

            He speared a cube of meat and held it to . “Say ah.”

            Once they were back in the car, Daehyun glanced at her as she clasped her seatbelt in place. “We have one more destination. I hope you’ll like it.” The way he said it made her anticipation heighten more.

            It was a bar. Jinli’s brow furrowed in confusion. What was he going to do here?

            Daehyun held his elbow out for her. “M’lady.”

            The bouncers at the door bowed to them as they walked past and Daehyun led her to a table in the front. The space was fairly large and there was a giant stage lit up with a soft green light. A woman was sitting on a chair in the spotlight, singing softly. The remaining patrons were quiet in silent appreciation.

            When the girl finished the last notes of her song, Daehyun stood up. “What would you like to drink?” Once he heard Jinli’s order, he nodded. “I’ll be right back.”

            Minutes passed and she saw a waiter walk his way to her. He politely placed the martini in front of her and melted away into the darkness. People were stirring around her but Daehyun still had not returned.

            The stage was suddenly bathed in a blue color and she turned to see what was going on. The curtains lifted and Daehyun walked out. He had a microphone in his hands and Jinli felt drop. He adjusted the top of his dress shirt as he walked towards the front of the stage. A few strains of violin started and he closed his eyes.

            The first notes out of his mouth were pure and immediately, the audience erupted into cheers. The only way she could describe his voice was honey. There were syllables sung with a slightly husky undertone. When her mind was able to compute the melody, she realized he was singing one of her favorite songs. Daehyun singing was also different. The emotions showed on his normally placid face. He kept his gaze on her the entire time, the expression in his eyes difficult to decipher. They had an intensity to them, but why, she could not place. He was so handsome, standing there in his dark clothes. There was a high note towards the end which he hit effortlessly.

            It was only when the song ended that she felt the pain from her nails digging into her palm. Daehyun bowed. “Thank you for humoring me, and listening to my performance. This is a seven month anniversary gift to my wife.” He gestured at her and the clapping increased. Jinli flushed. Her heart had relocated in , and it took all her control to stop the tears.

            He bowed again and disappeared once again backstage. She took the few minutes she had to collect herself. By the time Daehyun was back by her table, she was smiling again. “Aigoo,” he crooned as he took her hand. “Were you touched?”

            She wrinkled her nose to control her emotions again. “I didn’t know you were so talented.”

            His finger tapped her cheek and when he pulled it away, she saw that it was wet. “I’m glad you liked it.”

            “I didn’t even know you knew it was an anniversary.”

            Daehyun looked offended. “Please. Do you think I would just nonchalantly play hooky on work like this?”

            Jinli rolled her eyes. “May I remind you that the reason why you took a day off was because you came home drunk and I was the one to call Yongguk-Oppa to let you rest.”

            “All part of the plan, honey.”

            An elderly couple came up to them and beamed. “Congratulations. It is rare these days to find such a sweet and dedicated couple. Kids nowadays seem to marry in the passion and forget. We have been married for fifty-five years and we wish you two the best.”

            Daehyun grinned and bowed. “Thank you for your blessing.” Jinli returned the sentiments and was hyperaware of his grip on her hand. When they were out of earshot, he turned to her with a cocky smirk. “Looks like we’re killing this marriage game.”

            It astounded her how often he straddled the line between friendship, marriage and then reverted so quickly back to strangers. But in her own selfish interest, she welcomed the warm sentiments today. She rewarded Daehyun with a bright grin. “Yeah, I guess we are.”

            His free hand reached up to tuck her hair behind her ear. “You look really pretty today.” Despite the fact that another song had started and the audience was clapping, she felt like they were in their own universe. She followed his gaze as he stared at her lips then back at her. He moved slowly, leaning in inch by inch before giving her a small smile this time. “You ready to head back?”

            The sudden change made her heart fall a little and Jinli nodded. “Yeah, I think so.”

 

I really want to sincerely thank all of you for all your support of this story

I love writing it, and as you can tell I've been updating a bit more frequently but as I am writing this story, one fear stops me. And it is the fear of finishing.

I don't know how I would feel once this story is over... I don't know if I can start another one with Daehyun in it or maybe have it be as good and it's a little worrying.

But nonetheless, I will continue to work hard on this and give you guys the best I can.

That gif also has me so mesmerized. 

#HAPPYSKYDIVE1STWIN

 

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exoblaq #1
i open this account once in a while only to see if there's updates on this story and i'm so glad that every now and then there still are 🥹 i get this bittersweet feelings whenever i read new updates as it brings me back to when i first started reading it. it's like i grew up along with this story. it's been a decade and i still hold a space for the boys in my heart. thank you for being a reminder of my love for them author ☹️ best of luck in all of your endeavors!
exoblaq #2
Chapter 69: oh my gosh, congratulations so much on your wedding 🥹 as a long time reader, i am so happy for you. 🤍
idontknowvryn #3
Oooh
Khahani #4
Chapter 69: Congratulations on your marriage! May you are blessed with abundance of happiness with your significant other❤️❤️❤️
lovemejuseyo
#5
Chapter 69: Still here as well! I feel like we have all had these amazing milestones, and seeing you post feels like seeing an old friend! Sending big love on your special day!!! <3
valschanya #6
Chapter 69: After all these years, im still here. From uni to my first real job to numerous existensial crises to uni again... it's like a homecoming. Thank you for not giving up on this story!
akiazmi
#7
Chapter 1: Hey, thank you for this beautiful wrap. I have been reading this since I was a teen and now I'm in my late 20s and seeing your update really got me excited!!! 100% will find time to reread the entire story to relive all the emotions I felt with your writing. You've been amazing, I love you and congratulations on your marriage!! May you have a great love and happiness always.🥰

ps, yes I'm going to Yongguk's tour in Singapore!
ILoveKDramas1 #8
Chapter 69: Yaaay Author-nim your back with an update after so long!Some of us are still waiting earnestly for ur updates. 🤩 Congratulations on your pending wedding!!🎊
Khahani #9
Chapter 69: I am still here after all these yearsssss
frenetic #10
Chapter 69: Wow I'm so glad I checked in and saw the new chapter. I'm definitely staying till the end because I love this story to bits. Congratulations on your wedding!