Chanyeol stared at the screen, a blurry haze of binary code swimming before his eyes.

There was a knock on the door, and he barely registered Sehun calling him. “Chanyeol?”

He quickly wiped away the tears with his sleeve, willing them to stop rolling down his cheeks. It didn’t help. Sehun walked in, shocked to see the ever-cheerful rapper with puffy eyes and bright red cheeks.

“Hyung, what’s wrong?”

As the maknae approached the desk, Chanyeol forcefully slammed his laptop shut. “Nothing. I... just read this awful news report about animal abuse.”

Sehun promptly covered his ears with both hands and started walking back out of the room “Oh, don’t tell me, don’t tell me, I don’t want to hear about it.”

“I won’t.”

When he reached the door, Sehun turned back around. “Dinner’s ready. Will you join us?”

“Yeah, just give me a minute, please.”

“Sure.”

The door closed again. Chanyeol heard the scraping of chairs being pulled out and the excited chatter of the band members in the kitchen. His stomach lurched at the thought of Baekhyun being just a couple of feet away from him.

Chanyeol wasn’t the kind of guy to cry easily. He considered himself a well-balanced person, compared to some of his co-members.
It baffled him that the story had such an overwhelming effect on him.

It was a story of a different world, with different people. About a guy who happened to look like him, with the same name, but that was it.
There was no reason for him to feel guilty about the choices 10080-Chanyeol had made. There was no reason for him to feel the urge to walk over to Baekhyun in the other room and tell him that he wouldn’t leave him. That he’d never betray their friendship, or leave him hanging when something bad happened to him.

There was absolutely no reason for Chanyeol to think about his relationship with Baekhyun, to worry if his feelings for the vocalist had suddenly changed, or if he could go back to acting normal around him, as if this had never happened, as if he’d never heard about 10080.

But he did.

“, you look like hell.”

Jongin was always the straightforward one. Chanyeol coughed as he plopped down on the seat next to the tan dancer, grumbling he just woke up from a nap. He caught Sehun glancing over to him from the other end of the table, and Chanyeol was thankful he didn’t react to his little lie. He had made sure to use eye drops before joining the rest of the band. His eyes were swollen but not the angry red they’d been minutes before.

Dinner was torture.

He didn’t talk, feigning unusual interest in the food on his plate. Jongdae and Baekhyun, the other two mood makers of the group, seemed oblivious their usual sparring partner wasn’t playing along that night.
When Tao emptied the water jug, Chanyeol immediately volunteered to get a refill.
Any excuse to distance himself from his cheery band mates and especially Baekhyun, was welcome.

As he fiddled with the tap, he closed his eyes, and let the cold water stream over his wrists.

Breathe in - breathe out.

There would be awkward questions if anyone noticed his peculiar behavior; he needed to pull himself together. He was standing with his back towards the group when Baekhyun’s voice jerked him out of his trance.

“Chanyeol! Get the Tabasco sauce while you’re there, I couldn’t reach it. It’s in the cupboard above you.”
He hoped his friends wouldn’t notice his shaking hands as he held the jug under the streaming water, filling it to the brim. He reached for the spicy sauce and took a deep breath before turning around, facing the man he felt so upset with.

He placed the water jug at the center of the table and slid the little bottle of Tabasco towards Baekhyun. “Thanks, giant.” Chanyeol froze, and felt the color drain from his face. Baekhyun hadn’t noticed the bizarre reaction of his friend, but Chanyeol knew he had to get out of there. He needed to be alone.

As he made a beeline for his bedroom, Jongin called out to him. “Hey, you didn’t finish your dinner!”

“I’m done!”

Minseok quickly pulled Chanyeol’s plate toward him, picking up the pieces of meat the rapper had left untouched. Kyungsoo shot a dark look at the closed door of the room Chanyeol had fled to. “He didn’t even bother to clean up after himself. .”

Chanyeol pressed th