Jongin stood still in front of the door, unable to open it or walk away. He knew clearly who was going to be on the other side, and frankly he didn’t have the courage at the moment. He was normally so full of confidence, and wanted it back desperately because he felt like he was going to crumble on the ground any second.

Finally, after talking a couple of deep breaths and wiping his sweaty hands on his pants, he managed to grab the doorknob. It felt cold in his touch and he had to use all his willpower to not let go and storm away. Cringing, he slowly twisted it and pushed open the door. He stared as his room can into view with Kyungsoo sitting silently by his desk, eyes fixed on a piece of paper.

Kyungsoo’s slowly lifted his head and looked at Jongin. His eyes immediately hardened, but for some strange reason it wasn't out of anger and hatred Jongin was so used to. It was something entirely different. It almost looked like pain.

A momentary silence filled the air, the only sound being Jongin’s nervous breathing. Kyungsoo’s eyes remained fixed on the taller boy as he put down his pen.

“You’re late,” Kyungsoo said. Jongin’s eyes widened when he realized that Kyungsoo was actually talking to him. He wasn’t screaming, yelling, or even the occasional crying.

“I-I wasn’t sure if you were serious about me coming back,” Jongin replied tentatively, not wanting this to end. He would’ve done anything for the chance to have a civil conversation with the boy in front of him, and finally, after nine years, he was given the opportunity to do so.

Kyungsoo sighed and gripped his forehead as if he had a headache. Jongin frowned and wanted to ask him if he needed medicine, but he knew whatever he said was only going to piss the said boy off.

“Of course I was serious. I’m not going to joke about such things, am I?”

Jongin blinked. “Well, it’s just the way our relationship has been for the past years. It was hard to believe that you would want me back.”

Kyungsoo paled at Jongin’s words.

“I told you I wasn’t going to do this anymore,” Kyungsoo replied, his voice strained with weariness, “I meant what I said, Jongin.”

Jongin took a step forward and frowned when he saw Kyungsoo visibly flinch.

“I don’t understand. What do you mean? You never did anything Kyungsoo. What can you possibly stop doing if you haven’t properly started?”

“I’m talking about this. Arguing with you, hating on you, spending all my energy obsessed with trying to get away from you. I haven’t been able to do anything else but blame you for the past nine years, Jongin. Do you know how physically draining that is? To hate someone so much? Honestly, I’m sick of it. Doing this is doing me more harm that it is doing to you. So what’s the point?”

There was a reason why Jongin wasn’t known as being particularly bright. There was only one thing he was absolutely sure of in his life, and it was that he was in love with Do Kyungsoo. He didn’t know what exactly he had done, but whatever it was Jongin regretted it every passing second. If he had known it was going to come back and bite him in the back, he would’ve been much more careful when he was younger.

“Fine,” he said, “if that’s what you want, I can’t do anything about it. But do one last thing for me, will you? At least tell me exactly what I did. Explain why I was so hated on for so long. I did everything I could, Kyungsoo. I gave you my heart, but now you tell me that I was the one who stepped on yours. I know I’m not smart, but I’m not a complete idiot. I’m sure if I did such a thing I’d at least remember it. Please, before you completely shut me out of your life, clear things up a bit. Because if you just leave me right now, I really don’t know how I’ll be able to go on.”

Jongin’s eyes bore into Kyungsoo’s, and the shorter sighed before slowly standing up. Kyungsoo walked over to his bed and leaned over, eyes narrowing in concentration as his hands tried to reach for something beneath the bed. Finally, after minutes of searching, he straightened up with two large dolls in his arms. Jongin’s eyes widened as Kyungsoo walked over with the old, tattered pororo dolls.

“You remember this?” Kyungsoo asked with a bitter smile. “They’re the same ones you gave me years ago. This one is from third grade, and the other one is from when we were in middle school.”

Jongin extended his shaking hand and took one of the old dolls, holding it tightly. “I-I thought you threw this one away?”

Kyungsoo let out an airy laugh, as if the thought itself was ridiculous. “Jongin, of course I didn’t throw it away. I’ve tried for god knows how many times, but I was never able to go through with it. That’s so hypocritical of me, isn’t it? To tell you to stop, when even I wasn’t able to properly move on.”

“Kyungsoo-”

“Do you know how many hours I spent just hugging these dolls, crying my eyes out? I hated myself for it. Sometimes, I was even convinced I could smell you on these. But I couldn’t throw them out, Jongin.”

Jongin stared as Kyungsoo slowly took out the doll from Jongin’s hands and walked over to the trashcan. Without hesitating, he opened the lid and slipped in both dolls.

Kyungsoo’s gaze remained on the dolls. He held the lid in his hands, unable to put them back on.

“I reckon I should clear everything up before we finally come to an end,” Kyungsoo said. He turned his head to face at Jongin, who was staring back in horror.

“I’ve always been known as the weird kid. No one ever liked me, because I was too different and too abnormal. I was even expelled because everyone found out I was gay. When I finally moved to this school and met you, I thought I had a chance. To be accepted and to be normal for once in my life. You and your friends told me the truth; I could never escape who I was. I wasn’t abnormal only because I was gay. Being gay was never the problem for me. It was just who I was. That was enough to get everyone to hate me. You made me realize that. You’ve been teaching me that for the past nine years.”

Jongin took a shaky breath as he tried to reach out to the boy in front of him, but Kyungsoo flinched at his touch.

“Was it that horrifying that I confessed to you? Was it so unbearable that you had to decide to make my life into a living hell? From the moment you spilled that meal on me, you sent me a very clear message Jongin. I was just another loser in your eyes. How are you any different from my other bullies? How are you any different from Taemin?”

“You can’t compare me with Taemin!” Jongin yelled. “Kyungsoo, don’t you see? This whole situation here is a complete misunderstanding! I didn’t spill that meal on you because I hated you. It was a mistake! I was supposed to have done it on Kwanghee to make you laugh, but Taemin screwed everything up! I honestly didn’t know you would be so affected by it. I thought you had gotten sick of me.”

Kyungsoo let out a bitter laugh. “Remember that confession? The one you did in front of the whole cafeteria? That was the breaking point, Jongin. That was when you really showed me how you felt. I loved you, and I poured my heart out when I went to confess to you. But all you did was deny my feelings before I could even speak them and insult me for everyone to see! And years later, when I finally thought you might’ve gotten over it, you bring it up in the cruelest way possible. You mocked me in front of everyone, Jongin! I wanted to kill you so badly. The person I love was my biggest bully. Do you know how pathetic that makes me? You’ve been torturing me with my feelings for you, and yet I couldn’t get them to go away. I feel so utterly powerless and vulnerable when I’m with you. That’s why we’re never going to work. That’s why I need to put an end to this.”

With that, Kyungsoo slowly put down the lid, covering up the dolls completely. He met Jongin’s wavering eyes before pushing past him and heading towards the door. Suddenly, he felt Jongin’s hands grab his arm and stop him.

Jongin remained quiet, not having the courage to turn around. He was back to back to Kyungsoo.

“Tell me one last thing,” Jongin finally said, his voice cold, “is Taemin the reason why we won’t work?”

Kyungsoo sighed and pulled his arm away, leaving Jongin’s arm to limp to the side.

“You’re the reason why we won’t work,” Kyungsoo replied. He turned around to face Jongin’s back and smiled bitterly.

“I know this is stupid of me, but to properly wrap this up I think I should finally be given the chance to say this.” Kyungsoo walked around Jongin and stood in front of him. The taller male looked down in agony. Kyungsoo’s eyes remained fixed on Jongin’s face and before neither party could register what was happening, Kyungsoo slowly leaned forward and wrapped his hands around Jongin’s waist.

“I can’t believe it took me nine years to say this. I’m sorry for putting you in such a situation, but bear with me for a second,” Kyungsoo closed his eyes and leaned on Jongin’s frozen stature.

“Kim Jongin, even though this is going to kill me for saying it,” Kyungsoo slowly pulled away and looked up, meeting Jongin’s shocked eyes. “I really do love you.”

Jongin couldn’t do anything as Kyungsoo stepped back, his eyes filled with pain and distress. He was much too confused. He couldn’t believe that he had just heard the words he had always dreamed of hearing right before he knew everything was going to end. Right before he knew he couldn’t do anything further.

Kyungsoo tore his eyes away before walking past Jongin and closing the door behind him, both literally and the one to his heart. The last string of hope Jongin was so desperately holding on to had finally snapped, and there was nothing Jongin could do. He felt his body crumble to the ground and didn’t realize he was crying until he saw teardrops fall onto the floor.

It felt so unreal to be true. But the unbearable ache in his chest told him otherwise, and Jongin let his facade fall off and succumbed to the pain. Do Kyungsoo had finally walked away.

“Chanyeol? Where exactly are we going?” Baekhyun finally asked after minutes of being pulled around without a reason. Chanyeol’s eyes sparkled in excitement and he looked back with a wide grin.

“It’s a secret,” he said, “come on Baek. We don’t have much time before we need to go back to our rooms.”

Baekhyun didn’t have the time to register the fact that Chanyeol had just called him Baek, as he was soon dragged along the hallway once again. Not that he was complaining, with Chanyeol’s hands wrapped tightly around his and with no one around them to for his idiocy. He was more than happy to be here with Chanyeol, but that didn’t mean he wasn’t curious.

After a long time wandering around the empty halls, the pair finally arrived in front of a large door. Baekhyun leaned over Chanyeol’s tall shoulders and squinted at the wooden plate beside the door.

“Concert Hall,” Baekhyun read and looked at Chanyeol’s beaming face, “what’s in here?”

“Just the best thing in the world,” Chanyeol piped up and quickly looked around to make sure nobody was watching. He slowly reached down to his pocket and pulled out a silver key before inserting into the keyhole in the door.

“Chanyeol! Isn’t that school property? Why do you have the keys?” Baekhyun asked, his eyes widening in surprise. Chanyeol chuckled and pushed open the door, swinging the keys with his fingers.

“I knicked it off the janitor a few months ago. It’s no big deal; the janitor is clumsy so he loses things all the time. He’ll simply copy a new key.”

“Are you sure this is okay?” Baekhyun looked at the dark, empty hall with a nervous look. Chanyeol chuckled and pushed the tentative boy in, closing the door behind him.

“It’s fine, Baek. Nobody will ever know. How are you friends with the troublemaker Kim Jongin if you’re so afraid of breaking into an empty concert hall?”

Baekhyun turned bright red, and even though Chanyeol couldn’t see it through the darkness, he still felt very self-conscious.

“I’m not the problem here,” he muttered, catching Chanyeol’s attention, “you are. Your records are perfectly clean, aren’t they? I don’t want you to spoil that. I doubt you had any detentions before, you being all perfect-”

Baekhyun gasped and quickly closed his mouth, turning even redder than before. He didn’t have to see that Chanyeol was giving him another one of his large, cheeky grins.

“Perfect, huh?” Chanyeol said in a playful tone. “I’m not the goody two-shoes you think I am, Baek. I can be a rebel at times.”

Baekhyun had to keep in a snort from coming out. “A rebel? I hardly think you classify as a rebel, Chanyeol.”

“Hey, I’m the one breaking into an empty concert hall, aren’t I?” Chanyeol walked forward in the darkness. “Give me a moment. I’ll find the light switch.”

“Wait, Chanyeol, be careful-”

A loud crash and a cry of pain was heard. Chanyeol turned around in shock and tried to make out the source of the sound.

“Baekhyun? Where are you?”

There was a small groan and Chanyeol yelped when a hand suddenly grabbed his arm and pulled him down.

“Ow,” Baekhyun hissed. Chanyeol immediately scrambled to his feet and the lights, revealing Baekhyun lying on the floor.

“Baek?” Chanyeol asked. Baekhyun’s red face was fixed on the ground, and Chanyeol crouched down in front of him.

“Did you fall?” Baekhyun could hear the laughter in his voice and sighed.

“I was trying to warn you about the chair in front of you,” he murmured, “but I ended up tripping over it instead.”

Chanyeol blinked before bursting out in laughter. Baekhyun turned even redder and out of humiliation, pushed Chanyeol’s shaking shoulders away.

“Stop it, it’s embarrassing.”

This made Chanyeol laugh even louder. “God, Baekhyun, you’re adorable. Why do you make it so hard for me?”

Baekhyun looked up and stared at Chanyeol. “H-huh?”

Chanyeol merely shook his head while stifling another laughter and stood up, offering a hand to the boy on the ground. Baekhyun took it gratefully and was pulled to his feet.

“Next time I’ll do the warning, okay?”

“Y-yeah. You do that.”

Chanyeol turned around and led Baekhyun through the empty hall onto the stage. He pushed past the side curtains to reveal a large spacious room.

“The backstage,” he said as Baekhyun peeped in, eyes widening in awe, “isn’t it great?”

“Wow,” Baekhyun muttered and stepped forward. Although it was a simple room, the complex machinery and the sheer amount of instruments took him by surprise. He spun around and faced Chanyeol.

“How did you know I was interested in music?”

Chanyeol shrugged. “I hear things. It’s really not that hard to find out things about you, Baekhyun. You’re actually quite well known around here.”

Baekhyun quirked an eyebrow. “I don’t think so. You probably mean Jongin. He’s the one everyone loves, of course everyone besides Kyungsoo. I’m just known as the lazy, constantly sleeping friend of his.”

“That’s not true,” Chanyeol laughed. “People remember you as Byun Baekhyun, not Kim Jongin’s best friend. You’re much more than that.”

“Do you really mean that?” Baekhyun asked while his eyes were fixed on a piano nearby. Chanyeol cocked his head and gave him a warm smile.

“Of course I do,” he replied before placing his hands on top of Baekhyun’s shoulders and pushing him onto the piano seat.

“Here,” Chanyeol said before reaching to his pocket and taking out the key. He handed it to Baekhyun, who stared up at him in confusion.

“It’s my present. To you.”

Baekhyun’s eyes switched from the keys dangling in front of him back to Chanyeol’s face.

“You’re giving me the keys to the concert hall?”

Chanyeol smiled and grabbed Baekhyun’s hand, spreading it out forcefully. He stuffed the keys in the boy’s hands and then held it.

“Yup,” he nodded. “It’s all yours now. No one ever comes in here, so this place can be like your secret hideout. You can do anything you want to do.”

Baekhyun stared at the silver keys in his hands.

“Chanyeol,” he started, “why are you giving this to me?”

Chanyeol crouched down so he was eye to eye with the shorter boy.

“Because I want to, cutie,” he flicked Baekhyun’s bangs away, startling him, “and I want to make you happy. Don’t you like it?”

Silence filled the air, before Baekhyun finally broke out into a large grin and threw his arm around Chanyeol’s neck.

“I love it!” Baekhyun exclaimed. “Thanks Chanyeol.”

Chanyeol didn’t reply, and when Baekhyun finally realized what he just did he turned bright red and tried to pull away. Chanyeol, however, was much faster and quickly wrapped his arms around Baekhyun’s waist and made the boy sit still.

“You’re welcome,” he chuckled, oblivious to Baekhyun’s look of embarrassment as he slowly buried his head into Chanyeol’s shoulders, hoping Chanyeol wouldn’t be able to hear his racing heart.