You’d lifted your hand, staring at how the light reflected and shone through the pinker, thinner bits of skin folds in your palm.

It was a quiet day for once. You’d gotten lazy once finishing chores.

As you stared at your hand, you let your phone buzz beside you, enjoying the music playing in your headphones.

You’d barely noticed Chanyeol until you’d tilted your head back and saw him.

‘Chanyeol, you’re not with the others today?’ You asked, surprise threading your voice as you sat up. The boys had a boring day of outfit measurements and tailoring for an Inkigayo performance the next day.

‘Finished early.’ He’d replied, pulling down his khaki covered hoodie and ruffling his hair. He must have only just come in.

‘Can I?’ He asked before you could ask any other questions. He was pointing at your earphone before he flung his legs over the couch and rested his head on your lap.

His auburn hair looked so soft you wanted very slightly just to it.

‘Sure.’ You replied, your eyes ripping away from his hair while you popped an earphone out and gave it to him.

‘I’ve always wanted to know what sort of music you listen to. I heard the conversations you had with Jong Dae about...oh this sounds good.’ He hadn’t even finished his sentence before listening intently to the song.

‘I know right?’ You replied grinning. You’d barely experienced times with Chanyeol alone. His whole aura without Baekhyun altered…he felt…easier to be with…and even easier to talk with. It was as if he’d lost a reason to show off, the mask was off.

Chanyeol lowered his eyes momentarily, listening to the beat through his earphone.

You watched him silently, enjoying the fact that he liked the music.

Would it be ok to….

You lifted your hand, and carefully…combed your fingers through Chanyeol’s hair, into almost-petting him. Chanyeol froze momentarily at the movements, but become flacid once more. He’d accepted you.

No wonder fans called him a golden-retriever.

You almost closed your eyes too until-

‘You’re cut. It’s a scar now.’ Chanyeol’s eyes were open.

You looked down at him, then at the cut on your hand. The one you’d obtained cooking with him.

You’d forgotten the cut was there. But somehow seeing it again with Chanyeol’s fresh pair of eyes, the look of concern;

‘It’ll never fully go away.’ Chanyeol stated while you spread your fingers, looking at the mark.

‘Sometimes you need a reminder.’ You stated cryptically.

Chanyeol raised an eyebrow.

‘…Of the mistakes you’ve made.’ You muttered, not willing to share those memories of mistakes out loud.

‘So you don’t make those same mistakes again.’ You added quietly.

Chanyeol sighed and lifted his hand that had been crossed over his arm.

‘I have my scar too.’ He revealed it unphasedly. You both stared at the mark.

‘It’s more of a reminder not to cook again.’ You giggled at his joke, strands of your hair fell over your ear as you tilted your head forward.

‘I know what you mean though.’ Chanyeol added, becoming very still once more.

‘Every time I see it, it’s a reminder.’ He tightened his fingers for a moment and stared at his fist. You looked at him instead, your hand still placed over his loose waves.

‘A reminder of what?’ You asked intrigued.

He grinned; ‘Of the night, we really did become friends.’

The nostalgia washed through you.

That day in the kitchen…

‘In that moment; I realised there was someone else who cared about me. Now when I look at this scar…I think the pain was worth it.’

He traced the scar with his fingers;

‘I look at this scar and I don’t even feel pain…I only feel warmth.’

Chanyeol…

‘I didn’t know you were a softie too.’ You joked, only fractionally lightening the tone while Chanyeol gave a crooked grin.

His ears flushed slightly, you didn’t notice.

He refused to look at you in that moment, you still didn’t notice.

‘There’s a lot of things you don’t know about me.’ Chanyeol muttered softly.

‘You don’t know what kind of guy I could be.’

What I’d become…for you.

You stared back at him, and finally…Chanyeol looked back at you.

And you don’t know why you’d let him but…

But he’d lifted himself slightly off the couch, his head lifted further and further up…

You looked down at him, feeling your heart pound furiously against your rib cage. And yet you remained deathly still, staring at him.

With a far-too gentle touch for someone of his stature, Chanyeol brushed the loose strands of hair from your face.

‘Wear your bomber-hat more often.’ He uttered quietly. It was such a random statement, it almost made you laugh…almost.

Choosing not to believe it, you ignored the possibility that he may have lowered his large eyes to stare at your lips…and even more so, you ignored the possibility of a small voice in your head wanting him to…

You’d barely noticed your breath catching in your throat the moment Chanyeol lifted his head quicker to your—

-The Apartment door opened with a crash.

You jumped in your skin, turning to face the door, feeling Chanyeol freeze on your lap.

‘IF YOU DO THAT ONE MORE TIME YOU PIECE OF-‘

‘Yah _____-ah!!!!! Kyungsoo’s mean just because I…’

You didn’t have time to hear Baekhyun properly, but merely smiled and nodded, trying hard to pull off a poker face so no one would notice-

-‘Yah just get your own next time.’ Chanyeol winced as he sat up, placing his hand on the head of the couch to keep him up.

Baekhyun stood still, his mouth dropping open, his finger ready and pointed; waiting, ready to accuse-

-‘Wh-what are you doing there Chanyeol-‘

-‘Aish we were just listening to music, carry on.’ Chanyeol huffed, laying back on your lap to make a statement no doubt as he crossed his arms, this time he didn’t look at you.

And this time you didn’t dare look back.

If only you’d noticed his thundering heart...

========

Why were you remembering that now?

As you blanked out, touring the place with India as Sehun had gone to the photoshoot. Your mind was abuzz.

That memory, along with other moments ran riot through your brain.

You merely murmured replies to India as you walked in and out a room, unable to think straight.

When you had all eaten together…when someone had scraped their chair behind you.

You’d thought he’d seen it.

Perhaps he would come to talk to you.

You couldn’t believe it was Luhan instead who had come to your aid…

But Kyungsoo…

You missed Kyungsoo.

Perhaps he was angry – perhaps Jongin had told him about…what had happened.

Maybe you too, were too ashamed to look him in the eye.

Why?

Why did it bother you?

Because they were best friends. It felt awkward.

And you hated being awkward.

Speaking of awkward, Jongin.

It was a God send that India had swept you off to another part of the building.

But regardless, you’d have to attend the photoshoot Sehun, Luhan, Jongin and Taemin were at.

It was some promotional magazine shoot with probably the best-looking Koreans in SM.

You chose to ignore the politics and just role with it in the meantime.

But now that you’d have to see him…

It would be fine.

Thankfully the moment you’d finished the tour, you were called to go to the PD office with the recruit. And after taking India to the office, you were given a million other errands to run which hopefully meant you wouldn’t have to attend the photoshoot.

‘What’s with you and Sehun?’ India asked out of the blue. 

She was your underling which was fine with you. It meant she’d follow you and help you with jobs.

The question made you stutter;

‘Uh-uh what do you mean? That’s really random.’ You asked, sweat beginning to form for no reason on your brow.

India almost sighed, but stared at you intensely too as