affection is so cruel

Description

He hates people, kindness, hearts and the cold, but among these things he loves Myungsoo - posessively, inevitably, shamefully, solely and in haste - despite everything he did and still does.

 

 

 

 

Foreword

a/n:

asjdaskjdashj this is practically me with writer's block + no inspiration + really trying hard to write something coherent against my lovely and infinitely-better-at-writing rival (again) SO EXCUSE ME WHILE I CRY BECAUSE I CANNOT WRITE

thank you to guava for promising me a poster + listening to me whine and scrap ideas + all my manga feels AS I UNSUCCESSFULLY TRY TO NOT BE DISTRACTED BY THE WORLD iloveyousomuchguava<33

also thank you elly for getting me off my AND GIVING ME BEAUTIFUL MUSIC + LHYUN I LOVE YOU <3333

this is my entry for the sky is the limit: march madness! i am not actually meant to be here js

prompt;

(…I’ve missed you so much it has felt like missing you is all I am. Like if someone looked inside of me, there wouldn’t be a skeleton and muscles and blood and nerves. There’d just be memories of you and all the things I’ve tried to say and ripped out of this notebook, all the things that I want to say but can’t because I don’t have the words. You don’t know how bad that makes me feel. How can you? I can’t even begin to say. –Elizabeth Scott, Love You Hate You Miss You)

 

Author's Thoughts
eseech
WILL ACTUALLY REVISE THIS AND MAKE IT LESS UGLY
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Comments

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KyutiePies_EyeSmiles #1
I'm not even sure I'll get a reply, but I have a question. Hoya is the one with a difficult and let's say dangerous past, being in fights and slacking in school. While Myungsoo is the guy that is kind and caring, everyone loves and has it overall better than him. Right? After all I wonder what's with his parents....or did I just miss that part? (please don't tell me it was indeed the "he is living alone 'cause his parents are divorced thing").

Hoya the boy, who just longs for a home finds it with him, I'll get that and even that he's kinda scared (who wouldn't be). But I'm kind of confused in the end. Did Hoya just have an over reaction/a panic attack like a child, who thinks dreams are to good to last? Like Myungsoo just went out because he forgot something and cleaned up a bit and Hoya didn't see their usual stuff and Myungsso, so he freaked and run away?

I would appreciate more clearity ^^'
raymondteo9137 #2
Chapter 1: Love the emotions in this story.
But i dont really understand the story...
LuvSHINeeSNSD #3
Chapter 1: I dont teally understand ur story because ur story standard is high. But i can say ur writing skills is amazingly done! I cant write like this and that why i dont understand.
But i really love this story!!!!!! This is just pure amazing and awesome!
Thanks for making such a wonderful and amazing story!!!!! ^^
hallothere #4
Hey. What colour scheme do you want. If you don't reply to this, your just getting black. Or a really delayed poster

...


Not that it isn't delayed already :P
kagaki #5
Chapter 1: You don't deserve my compliments anymore...
Instead let me show my love for your writing -hands an award for being my favorite piece and author-

-skips away-
infinitenbeyond #6
Chapter 1: This was a good read :) it could have been better though, but it's awesome enough, considering how you had a writer's block
I just felt that the emotion of missing someone wasn't portrayed strongly enough. I feel deeply about the quote that the story was centered upon, but I couldn't feel that intense, raw and painful feeling of missing someone from Hoya.
Or perhaps it was the plot that didnt really bring out the certain emotion. Or maybe its the writing style. I usually like this kind of writing style. short, indirect, not descriptive yet captures the main point beautifully. it didnt work for me here, though. I don't know.
Still, you are a really great author and I really admire your works haha I could never write as well as you.
And I really liked this part <3 '“I’m home,” Hoya repeats. Stupidly, pathetically, pitifully, lovingly – he’s home and in love with a monster.'
hallothere #7
Wait. There was no promise
hototheya #8
Chapter 1: But, but you said you had a writer's block. Do you always come up with wonderful fics like this everytimes you have a writer's block? Omg. I love everything about this fic. The vivid scenery, the charaterization, the feel hiding under every word. I can't help being mesmerized by your myungsoo. He's harmful and surely unhealthy yet charming and mysterious. And don't let me start with the whole comparing hoya's love with a child's affection. His love just happened so naturally and unavoidably and hoya knew he's helpless in this but he couldn't stop himself. The metaphor is perfect. Everything is perfect. Though I still don't get the ending. I think I have to read this again to be able to get all the details. Hmmm. Oh and the poster is beautiful, just so you know.
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