What Bullying Really Does To You


I couldn't ever bring myself to hate you.

I love you.

I'll never regret loving you.

They're my last words. 

Please don't forget them Oh Sehun.

I will always love you and I hope you can forgive me.

Be happy for both of us.

It’s my last wish

- Luhan



Two years ago I had friends,

Two years ago I was happy,

Two years ago I used to smile,

Two years ago I was loved,

                                        . . . . . . . . . .and now I'm ashamed to say my name is Xi Lu Han   







All I can feel is pain. Torment that cripples my thoughts; sending ripples through my dreams. My mind is clouded with memories of us and images of you. My eyes are blinded with tears, drop after drop. Can’t you see my pain? Can’t you hear my heart shattering, tearing apart mercilessly? You scar me, breaking down my barriers. You resent me, breaking me down; making me crumble. It took one secret to get to where we are, one secret for you to hate me. One secret for everyone to turn against me. I feel numb, tired and exhausted. You’ve left me hurt, lonely and betrayed; but I can’t stop loving you. I love you Oh Sehun. Please don’t forget that – Luhan.


A special thank you to dreamer0205 for this trailer.

Working on the next chapter xx

Comments (2116)

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AbiZ2003 34 streak #1
Chapter 19: Sehun... Argh I'm not used to reading angst... Authornim, you're messing with my mind so bad, but above all I feel so lucky to be who I am, where I am. Thank you for reminding me.
queenhunie #2
Chapter 19: I will wait my whole life for a new chapter
teenfinite97 #3
This is one of those fanfictions you always keep coming back to. I’ve reread so many chapters, but it’s just so good. Keep up the good work, authornim! And I’ll happily be waiting till your next update :)
Hello we're still waiting :) hope you are doing well
Oh_HanHan #5
Oh I'm still waiting for this ?
Chapter 19: Oh sehun you are making me curse you
Chapter 19: we need chapter 20!!!
Chapter 19: Idk why but I want luhan end up with kai..
Sehun is like a thorn..He hurted luhan in many ways..
At first,I am rooting for hunhan but kai character is distracting me in a good way^^
He's a great saviour
Exokoreaboo #9
Chapter 19: Damn this is the first fanfiction i really like...you're a real artist!!! (Unlike some of the writers here lol)

bloomemerald #10
Chapter 19: Please please pleaseeeeeeee update
This could even be my most favourite fanfics ever I love it so much
I just hope you won't let Kai end up alone have another person for him maybe kyungsoo :)
Also I really want to see hunhan go further and be happy and luhan dad put into jail would be nice