“, it’s getting colder out,” Jongdae swears as he hobbles into the club room. “Thank god for coffee. Thanks, Chanyeol.”

                “Uh-huh,” Chanyeol says distractedly, tapping the space bar on his keyboard at a hundred miles per minute—looked to be playing some old-school version of Donkey Kong or something. Assembling all twelve members at once was actually a pretty rare occasion, since they all had different schedules, but most had taken to hanging out in the club room between classes.

                “Our old president complained about the school’s newspaper having their own clubroom and managed to dig out some loop in the equal rights section of the university’s rules and regulations,” Kyungsoo had explained to Jongin when he’d asked.

                Luckily none of the other clubs had caught wind of this yet.

                “What brew is this?” Jongdae asks, picking up the pot and lifting the lid up a little bit to sniff it.

                “Starbucks Blonde Roast or some . Baekhyun said there was some deal going on where you got a free tall drink if you bought a bag, and he fell for it, the idiot,” Minseok says, keyboard propped on top of his computer monitor as he flipped through the books covering his office space. As of right now, only he, Chanyeol, Jongdae and Luhan were present in the clubroom.

                “How are the new recruits coming along?” Jongdae asks conversationally as he fills his mug.

                “So far Sehun’s a total airhead who doesn’t think about anything but food, which is weird because he’s so damn skinny,” Minseok snorts.

                “Damn fast metabolisms,” Jongdae mutters. “What about Mr. Fancy-Pants-Tan-Man-Jongin? Kyungsoo watching over him like the dear leader asked?”

                “Apparently, but Jongin’s doing all the work for him.”

                “What do you mean?” Jongdae asks, taking his seat.

                “He follows Kyungsoo like a lost puppy. Which is also weird because you’d think it’d be the other way around, what with Kyungsoo’s eyes and Jongin’s…”

                “Natural appeal?” Luhan offers.

                “Putting it mildly. It’s so weird trying to look at that kid. He strikes me as the popular jock-type who got smash drunk every weekend during high school, but he’s actually so awkward it hurts. Have you ever seen him laugh? He looks like a freaking kitten.”

                “Maybe the ballet classes mushed up his brain?” Luhan suggests. “I can only imagine what wearing tights and a leotard can do to a man’s pride.”

                “You have a good point.”

                “Sup,” Tao says casually, strolling into the room. “Awesome, coffee.”

                “Hey Tao,” Chanyeol greets him lazily without looking up.

                “So what’s going on?”

                “We were just talking about Jongin’s awkwardness,” Minseok says, doodling in the corner of his notebook.

                “Is it that bad? He seemed okay when I first picked him up.”

                “Kinda. I’m willing to bet it has something to do with him not knowing anyone here. He said he came from some high school on the west side, right? Probably doesn’t know what to do anymore without all of his high school groupies surrounding him.”

                “Doesn’t it still seem odd, though?” Jongdae asks, spinning around in his chair. “I mean, with a face and talent like that, you wouldn’t expect someone to be so intrapersonal.”

                “Intra-what?” Minseok looks up and frowns.

                “Intrapersonal. Didn’t you guys ever do that testing thing in high school to see what kind of jobs you’d be good for and stuff?”

                “Intrapersonal is for the type of intelligence, idiot. I’m pretty sure you mean introverted.”

                “Wait, I thought intrapersonal was the one for people who are sociable?” Luhan asks, blinking. “Cause interpersonal sounds more like the inner self. Like, interpersonal?”

                “No, it’s one of those weird opposite logic things where it’s actually the one that doesn’t sound like what you think it would be. Interpersonal is the one who’s good with people and intrapersonal is the one who isn’t,” Minseok explains.

                “Those stupid tests were so generic anyways. So I’m a visual learner, big whoop. I learned that in like the fifth grade,” Jongdae says, scrunching his nose in remembrance.

                The door burst open again as Sehun came barrelling into the room, looking alarmed. “You guys,” he says before anyone else can speak up, “they use potassium for lethal injections.”

                Everyone stares. “What the are you going on about?” Minseok asks.

                Jongdae looks at his watch in disbelief. “Are you telling me that all six of us have no classes on Fridays at twelve?”

                “I don’t have classes on Fridays period,” Sehun replies.

                “Wait, then why the hell are you—”

                “Not important, look, did you hear what I said? They use potassium in lethal injections,” Sehun rants, before leaning forward and repeating for emphasis, “Potassium.”

                “What’s your point?” Tao asks.

                “Potassium is in bananas, you guys. Now I can’t eat whole bunches of bananas anymore. What if I like, died?” Sehun stresses.

                “No, wait, I’d like to stop this for a second and ask why the you were eating whole bunches of bananas in the first place.”

                “Sugar rush, probably,” Luhan says.

                “Sugar rush?” Minseok echoes. “From bananas?”

                “Yeah, they’re really high in sugar. Didn’t you guys ever notice how sweet they are?” Luhan asks.

                A pause, and then, “Holy .”

                “Ohhhh,” Sehun says, looking up at the ceiling. “That explains a lot.”

                “If you have any stories, I sincerely don’t want to hear them.”

—∞—

                “So, wait,” Tao says slowly, “you’re telling me that you went on a shopping spree for coconut-scented body everything, because your horoscope read that it was the scent of the Scorpio sign?”

                Kris raised an eyebrow from where he was working at his desk. “Problem?”

                “…You’re a .”

                “I’d love to hear that again after I’ve attracted the entire female population with the scent of my uality.”

                “They’re coming,” Sehun says, looking up from where he was reading a magazine in his bean bag chair and glancing out the window.

                “Play it cool, guys, don’t give anything away,” Luhan warns as he turns towards his computer monitor and pulls up a PDF file, pretending to read it intensely, while Tao, Kris, Chanyeol, Minseok and Yixing follow suit.

                The sound of footsteps and two voices—one rather up-beat, as per usual, and the other one stuttering every other sentence (Ugh, he’s so lame, Sehun groans internally as he continues his magazine) begin approaching, until finally the door opens up, revealing a barely-visible Jongin behind the tower of containers stacked in his arms, and Kyungsoo holding a couple of grocery bags in his hands.

                “Wow, we’ve got a lot today,” Kyungsoo says, eyebrows shooting up. “Good thing I made enough for twelve.”

                All attempts at fake disinterest immediately snapped as six heads turn to stare at the load in Jongin’s arms. “Is that…” Kris gasps.

                “Yep.” Kyungsoo’s full lips curled into a wide smile. “I made some food this morning before I got here, so—”

                Chanyeol practically outright sobs in gratitude as Tao and Kris both shoot up from their seats and race to Jongin faster than he had ever seen anyone move.

                “Paws off, I get first plate,” Tao growls, as both he and Kris pry the containers out of Jongin’s grip, each one carefully tied up inside a plastic bag to prevent any spillage in the event of a dropped container.

                “That’s my line, peasant. Last I checked the President nameplate was on my desk,” Kris shot back.

                Yixing suddenly materializes behind both of them, causing them to flinch back in shock, even more so when they see the murderous intent in his glare.

                “If either of you so much as let the food within a foot of the ground,” Yixing says, in an eerily calm voice, “I will rip the two of you in half.”

                Tao and Kris cower back. “Yes, Yixing,” Tao replies automatically without looking up.

                “Damn, maybe we should’ve elected Yixing for President,” Minseok snickers as he takes over and carefully places one of the containers on the desk before unwrapping it.

                His jaw drops. “Oh my god, is this—”

                “What?” Jongin demands, moving in for a closer look as Sehun hops up from his seat and follows suit.

                “KIMCHI SPAGHETTI!” Chanyeol screams, before whirling around to sweep Kyungsoo off the ground in a bear hug. “Thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you—!”

                “You’re squishing me,” Kyungsoo barely makes out, but Chanyeol’s too busy whirling him around to notice.

                “Wait, what is it?” Sehun asks, looking between the others in a desperate attempt to find the reason behind their outrageous reactions.

                “It is the epitome of the food eaten by gods,” Luhan says, placing a hand over his heart as Minseok, Tao and Kris rush to shove the entire container into the microwave and set the timer. “It is the magnum opus of all of Kyungsoo’s cooking, the Holy Grail of Asian fusion.”

                “…Kimchi spaghetti?”

                “That is correct, young grasshopper. Today, you will know the true meaning of happiness.”

                Kris steps in at that moment to place a hand on Jongin’s shoulder, a serious look on his face, much to Jongin’s confusion.

                “What?” Jongin asks.

                “Kimchi,” Kris beings slowly, “is a type of pickled cabbage indigenous to the Korean culture, often served as a side during meals and spiced with—”

                “I know what kimchi is,” Jongin says, shaking off Kris’ hand. “I’m not that white-washed. I eat Asian food and stuff too.”

                “Ah, yes, but as it so happens, many other white people in this area also know what kimchi is. So the real question is, do you have any in your fridge at home?” Kris challenges.

                Jongin bit his lip. “…No.”

                Kris smiles knowingly and pats Jongin’s shoulder. “As I thought. You, my good man, are a Twinkie through and through.”

                “Did you just call me a…?”

                “A Twinkie,” Minseok grins, pulling out some paper plates. “It’s the term we use round here for folks who are yellow on the outside and white on the inside. Get it?”

                Sehun bursts out laughing so hard that he loses balance and staggers into the double-desk. “Oh my god, that is ing genius,” he manages between bales of laughter.

                “No matter. He’ll be one of us soon enough,” Kris says decidedly, shrugging.

                “So, Jongin,” Luhan says, turning towards him with that infamous nonchalant look of his, “did you get around to finishing Baekhyun’s list yet?”

                “Yeah, I did, actually,” Jongin sighs, not picking up the way everyone paused a little bit in their step or the way Chanyeol finally dropped Kyungsoo unceremoniously behind him. “It was pretty long, but I didn’t mind. He actually has really good taste in movies.”

                “So which one was your favourite?” Luhan asks.

                Everyone holds their breath as Jongin pauses to think for a few seconds, before answering, “I thought Forrest Gump was pretty—”

                “WHAT!!” Minseok, Tao and Kris holler, making Jongin jump.

                Luhan’s innocent expression abruptly twists into one of triumph as a stream of diabolical cackling filled the air. “What’d I tell you?” he says, smirking at the others. “And after all that discussion. Tsk tsk.”

                Jongin turns to Kyungsoo for an explanation, completely lost, but Kyungsoo’s just as dumbfounded as he is.

                “What’s going on?” Kyungsoo asks.

                “We were betting amongst ourselves to see which category Jongin filed under,” Luhan explains, as Tao’s head hits the desk with a loud thump. “A lot of the movies on Baekhyun’s list have overlaps when it comes to the directors-slash-producers-slash-writers, so we were trying to guess which director-specific movie he’d pick. And, of course, I was the only one who guessed that he wouldn’t pick anything directed by someone mainstream.”

                “I was so, so sure,” Kris shakes a fist to the sky. “He had Tarantino written all over him.”

                “At least you didn’t say the Coen Brothers like this idiot,” Luhan says, motioning towards Minseok. “Honestly, Minseok, where did that even come from?”

                “He looked like a Coen Brothers kind of guy to me, okay? Lay off already,” Minseok says sourly.

                Jongin stares at the lot of them like they were speaking a foreign language. “How do you guys know all this stuff?”

                “Believe me, when you hang around Baekhyun enough, you’ll understand. His obsession is catching,” Minseok replies seriously. “You’ll never be able to able to look at movies the same way again.”

                “Okay…”

                “No, for real. It will ruin movie-watching for you forever.”

                “Stop being so goddamn melodramatic, Minseok,” Kris says, taking the container of spaghetti back out of the microwave. “You’re scaring off the newbie.”

                “Hey, I’m not the one who—hey what the hell stop poking your fingers into the food!”

                “I’m checking to see if it’s hot in the middle, alright?!”

                Kyungsoo chuckles a bit, reminding Jongin that he was still standing next to him. “They seem to be really excited about your food,” Jongin remarks.

                “I think they’re just excited about food period,” Kyungsoo snorts. “Although I don’t mind cooking for them. Kind of a hobby.”

                “Pretty nifty hobby.”

                “Yeah, it’s nice not having to rely on takeout and fast food all the time.”

                “I was thinking more in terms of slipping unknown substances into the food you feed them, but I guess that works too.”

                Kyungsoo laughs at this, and Jongin automatically grins back when he hears the sound. At which point he internally slaps himself, because dammit Jongin this is not what cool and unaffected looks like and he’s probably just laughing at your stupid joke because he’s a nice guy, but it was impossible not to smile back when Kyungsoo laughed like that.

                Wait. Why did he care what his expression looked like anyway?

                “Kyungsoo, will you be a darling and see if you could find some more chopsticks? We seemed to have run out,” Kris calls from the microwave.

                “Yeah, no problem. Should really bring some metal ones in,” Kyungsoo says to himself as he turns and makes his way back down the hallway.

                “So.”

                Jongin flinches as Luhan suddenly pops up at his shoulder, a full plate in his hands and a crafty look to his eye.

                “How’s that working for you?” Luhan asks sweetly.

                “What?”

                “Your crush on Do Kyungsoo.”

                Jongin’s eyes almost go as wide as Kyungsoo’s as he sputters, “I don’t—”

                “Yes you do.” Kris pops up at Jongin’s other shoulder, sandwiching him in a prison of interrogation. “Don’t play dumb with us. We know.”

                “No, look, you’ve got it all wrong. I’m straight,” Jongin argues.

                “Are you now?” Kris asks, wiggling an eyebrow expertly.

                “Yes!”

                “So you’re telling me that you don’t feel any attraction towards Kyungsoo?”

                “Yes!” Jongin snaps again, a little too quickly and a little too loudly.

                “Uh-huh, right.” Kris shoves a plate into Jongin’s hands. “Come talk to us when you’re ready face the music.”

                “But I’m not—”

                “Shhh,” Luhan shushes Jongin by patting the top of his head. “Now now. Just eat up like a good boy so you can relish the expression on your dear Kyungsoo’s face when he sees how much you’ve fallen in love with his cooking.” He leans in then and whispers in Jongin’s ear, “I hear he likes to do all the cooking in the relationship.”

                And with that him and Kris retreat before Jongin could retort, leaving him with the inability to form any new words and struggling not to think about what Kyungsoo would be like in a relationship.

                “Oh , I totally forgot to ask Kyungsoo to grab a fork for Jongin.”

                “I know how to use chopsticks, okay?!”

A/N

HAHAHAHAHAHA I MADE KYUNGSOO COOK KIMCHI SPAGHETTI *throws self out window*

Unedited chapter is unedited don't kill me

If any of your guys were curious as to what exactly Baekhyun's list is you can find it here. Jongin wasn't kidding when he said it was long.

AND NOW TO CAP OFF THIS GLORIOUS DAY HERE IS A GIFSET OF SEHUN ING UP MY BIAS LIST

Sehun goddammit