Today is my last day here in Japan. I have successfully wrapped up my commitments. The whole day, all I did was go on a shopping spree with the staff. Tonight, I requested my manager to just let me walk around Tokyo all by myself. I had a hard time convincing him but in the end he agreed but he made me promise to always keep my phone with me.

I may have experience a lot of horrible things here in Japan but this country will always have a soft spot in my heart.

Back in 2010, we were supposed to have our Japanese debut but it was cancelled because Japan had a major earthquake which triggered a killer tsunami. Can you imagine the terror we felt that time? Imagine yourself in 31^st floor all by yourself with everything around you shaking violently? Can you feel it now?​

My family, friends, colleagues, fans...I am all thinking about them. At that time, I have accepted that maybe I am destined to die in Japan. My only regret is that I will be leaving the people I love at such an early age without even saying goodbye. Luckily, God has other plans for us, so we were able to survive that killer earthquake. Just like all the people in Japan, we moved on from that earth shattering experience but we never forget the lessons it taught us.

That day, I learned that we should never forget to express our love to someone because we'll never know if this is going to be our last day. We should not hold grudges and we should learn to forgive before it’s too late. Live your life like it is your last day. Live, love, forgive and be happy – those were my mantra ever since.

As I enjoy my leisurely walk in one of  Tokyo's park, I can’t help but remember one of the episodes in 2ne1TV. Remember that time when YG entertainment and Avex announced its partnership here in Japan? From our music video shoot, we went straight to Japan. We were so dead tired that time but we tried to smile and be lively for the Japanese media and the fans. I even remember how my fellow artists and the media men laugh when I showed them my skills in Japanese.

Do you still remember the scene when I went inside my room and showed you the beautiful night view of Japan? Can you still remember what I said before? Well in that episode, I remember looking outside the window with longing in my eyes. I even said that a view like that should be shared with someone special.

An old romantic, I will always be. Maybe growing up in Philippines has influenced me a lot. While Koreans are also romantic, our culture is very conservative that couples sometimes can't express their love and affection in public freely. In Philippines, you can freely express your love towards someone. If you are lucky enough, the fans might even support your relationship. Letting the public know about your relationship may even be beneficial for your respective careers.

Why am I telling this to you? Well, I just want to share something to all of you. When I went back to Korea and became an idol, the simple pleasures that couples get to experience like strolling together became forbidden for us. If you are an idol, you have to hide your relationship in the public's eye. If things get bad, you even have to deny it just to protect each other's career.

I continued walking while enjoying the colorful street lights and the cherry blossom trees. This place is really ideal for dating. The falling petals of cherry blossoms along the street add to the romantic atmosphere. I suddenly wish that someone is with me right now to share this experience.

I stopped on my tracks when a boy and a girl, holding hands while walking suddenly flashed on my eyes. They looked so happy and contented with each other. I saw the boy let go of the girl's hand just to put his arms on her shoulder. The girl moves her hand on the boy's waist and they continued walking. Such simple gestures but very heartwarming.

They are a picture of a couple very much in love.  I saw them stopped under the street light. They just stand there looking at each other. Even though they are so near to me, I can't seem to get a clearer view of their faces. I saw how the guy mumbled something which made the girl smile. After that, I saw them share a tender kiss. The scene is just so romantic; I thought I am watching a romantic film.

I may have space out for a couple of minutes because when I came back to my senses, I couldn't see them anymore.

I thought I heard someone laugh and when I turned around, I saw the boy and girl again. They are under a cherry blossom tree. I stayed on my spot and observe them from afar. They look like they are arguing about something. I saw the guy bring out a Swiss knife then slowly went towards the girl. I thought he was going to hurt the girl but what happened next made me shake my head in amusement.

The guy said something and I saw the girl nod in agreement. After that, the guy went in front of the tree trunk and started carving something. The girl just looks at the guy excitedly. After few minutes, the guy motioned the girl to get closer so she can check the guy's work. The girl inspect the carvings while tracing her hands into it. I saw how the girl cutely pouted after inspecting it. She was telling the guy that it doesn't look like heart. I laugh when he complained to the guy that the carvings look like an apple instead of a heart. The guy seems to get offended with the girl’s comment so he turned around and cross his hands on his chest.

The girl may have sense that the guy was hurt by her remarks so she went to the guy. When she was behind the guy, she suddenly gives the guy a hug and said sweet nothings to him. From my view, I saw how the guy's small smile turned into a gummy smile. But he didn't turn around immediately. He pretended that he is still mad.

So what the girl did is he turned him around to make him look at her. I saw how the girl said sorry to the guy but he is playing hard to get. So, the girl asked the guy what she needs to do in order to forgive her.  The guy told the girl to do aegyo in front of him. The girl’s eyes widen and she looks a little panicky after that. She told the guy that she can't do aegyo but the guy insisted. After ten minutes of contemplating whether to do or not to do aegyo, the girl finally agreed with the guy.

The girl started doing aegyo in front of the guy. The thing is her aegyo is not like of any other girls. She looks so awkward doing it. But being her awkward self just made her look more adorable. She certainly has her own way of making aegyo that you can’t see in other girls. When the guy can't finally contain his feelings anymore, he went towards the girl and started pinching her cheeks. After that, I saw how he lifted the girl then started turning around. Their laughter can be heard in the silent night.

When he put the girl down, they just stayed there under the cherry blossom tree looking into each other's eyes. I saw the guy took the girl's hand then place it on his chest. A contented look can be seen on their faces. The guy said something about how the girl owns his heart and the girl said the same thing. They both looked at the tree and I heard them both say that this is their couple tree. They look into each other again; you can feel the love overflowing from them. And just like in the movie, I saw how the guy leaned down to kiss the girl on the lips. Under their couple tree, with cherry blossom petals falling on them, they shared a long passionate kiss.

Tears fell from my eyes after witnessing it. When I wiped my tears and look back at them, I couldn't see them any longer.  When I look up I saw a firefly hovering above my head. The firefly started moving and its flickering light seems like telling me to follow.

I felt my legs move and before I knew it, I am now following the firefly. I suddenly remember the Japanese myth about fireflies which made me love fireflies more.

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It's such a busy day for me and the boys. We've just finish recording in Music Core and I am feeling so tired. I really want to sleep early today so I decided to go home. After taking a shower and changing to comfortable clothes, I lie on my bed and close my eyes. But no matter how much I try, sleep seems to elude me. My eyes are close but my mind is working non-stop, so I get up from my bed and change my clothes. I decided to take a walk to clear my mind and to relax. Yes, maybe a walk in the park will help me relax and hopefully after that I can finally have my much needed sleep.

I walk aimlessly in the streets of Tokyo until my feet brought me to this oh so familiar place. This park, yes I've been in this park some time ago. A gentle smile appeared on my face as I let my eyes roam around the place.

Yes, Dara and I walk around this park some time ago. Unconsciously, my legs started moving bringing me to the places where Dara and I went before.

I inhaled deeply as I walk underneath the cherry blossom trees. Yes, this is where Dara and I used to walk together. I can remember how I held her hands as we happily walk around. It seems like our walk in the park date only happens just now for I can still feel how I felt that night.

I continued walking and I stop in front of a lamp post. Yes, underneath this post, we shared a very tender kiss. I felt my heart fluttered as I remember that moment. I closed my eyes and I can clearly see how Dara closed her eyes and her lips parted when I bridge the gap between our faces. With still my eyes closed, I trace my lips with my hands and recalled the feeling when I am kissing her tenderly underneath this post. Yes, this post is our witness to our love for each other.

My feet still remembers the path we’ve walk through. It feels like I am walking inside a museum that chronicles our activities in this place. Every step I make, the place seems to remind me how Dara and I had fun that night. Holding hands while walking, Dara consider this as the sweetest thing that I have done for her. For other people, they may not consider this as a sweet act, but for people like us who are under the close scrutiny of the public’s eyes all the time, being able to hold hands in the park is already a milestone in our relationship.

My legs take me further and I saw this familiar tree. I walk faster towards the tree and my eyes get teary eyed when I look at it. I trace what was carved in the tree trunk and I felt my eyes get misty. I trace the carvings with my hands and my heart tightened.

A heart was carved in the trunk with the letters “KJ&SP Forever” inside the heart. I can remember every detail on how these carvings were made. I remember how we argued on what words to carve. I remember how she complained that the supposed to be heart looks more of an apple. I remember how I acted like I am offended. Her back hug, the way she whispered sweet nothings to me and the way she did her aegyo just so I can forgive her. I remember everything. I remember how I told her that she owns my heart and vice versa. And above all, I remember how we shared a passionate kiss, in front of our couple tree with cherry blossom petals falling on us.

I look up and close my eyes to get hold of my emotions. Must not cry…this is what I am chanting in my mind. When I opened my eyes, the flickering light of a firefly greeted me. I stared at the firefly fascinated and suddenly remember this Japanese myth about fireflies.

My feet seem to have a mind of their own because I started following the firefly. Every flicker it gives, it seems like the firefly is sending message for me. Every step I make I feel my heart beat faster.

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The Firefly Myth

Once upon a time, a woodman and his wife lived on the edge of a beautiful forest beneath Mount Fujiyama in Japan. They had a cozy little house and a beautiful garden, but they were not happy, as they wished for a child. One moonlit night, the wife slipped out of the house and laid herself down before the great mountain with its shining snowcap. She begged for Fujiyama to send her and her husband a child. 
As she prayed, a tiny light appeared high upon the mountain and began to drift down toward the woman. When the light reached the branches of the bamboo, it stopped. The woman was overjoyed when she found it was a Moonchild, sent by the Lady in the Moon herself.

She took the child home and her husband was overjoyed as well. 
The Moonchild grew into a beautiful young lady, a Moon Princess, and was beloved by all who saw her. When the Emperor's son saw her, he asked for her hand in marriage. However, she refused, saying that her mother, the Moon Lady, had bidden her to return home when she reached the age of twenty. 
 

When the night came for her to leave, the woodman, his wife, and the Emperor's son were all there to say goodbye, and they were inconsolable. The Lady in the Moon sent down a silver moonbeam for her daughter, and the Princess floated up upon it. As she floated, the Princess cried silver tears for those she left behind. As they fell, they took wing and flew all over the land. 
The Moon Princess' tears can still be seen on moonlit nights. Some call them fireflies, but those who know the legend know that they are the Princess' tears, searching for those she loved on Earth and had to leave behind.(credit to: http://www.angelfire.com/on/lunamoonworld/fireflymyth.html)

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Dara keeps following the firefly. Ever since she heard about that myth, she can’t help but sympathize with the characters in that myth. Every time she saw fireflies, she always remembers the different kinds of love manifested in the story.

There’s this unconditional love that parents give to their children. Parents love for their children is incomparable. There was a saying that says “A son or daughter can ignore their parents but parents can never stand ignoring their child.

There’s also this love for a man and a woman. This love is when you finally found the one that makes your heart flutters. This is when you feel something special to someone. That someone will eventually make your world brighter and a better place to live in. This kind of love brings delicious feels but when one of you finally falls out of love, one of you will bound to suffer and get hurt. Sometimes, it’s both of you who suffers and get hurt.

Love, love, love….who can live without it?

She keeps on walking following wherever the firefly goes. Her eyes are focused on the glowing insect. She finally stops on her tracks when the firefly stops moving. Another firefly approached the firefly she is following and they just hovered above her. The two fireflies seem so happy being reunited. They keep floating above while their beautiful lights flicker. I stand there transfixed with nature’s beauty.

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Jiyong mindlessly follows the firefly. He can’t explain why but his heart is really beating fast right now. Oh maybe he got really affected with the firefly myth that he recalled when he saw the firefly. Firefly for him signifies unconditional love. A love that requires you to let go of someone even if it will hurt you.  A love that wishes their loved ones of better things and higher purpose.

Just like in the story where fireflies represents the Princess’s love still searching for her loved ones she has to leave behind, he is also in tears  for the love he has to shoo away. He has to let go in order for his beloved one to not die.  He has to let go because his love has turned so dangerous his lover might die of suffocation.

He’s been looking at the firefly intently his neck is starting to get stiff. Every step he makes, the flickering of the firefly’s light intensifies. After few more steps the firefly finally stops moving. The firefly just continues hovering above until another firefly approach it.

Are they relatives, friends or colleagues? Or are they somehow lovers who were reunited after separating from each other. These are the questions that are playing inside Jiyong’s mind. He just keep on looking at the two fireflies who dances happily just above his head.

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The two fireflies finally reunited after completing their mission. They look happily at each other and started dancing around. They have been tasked to let the paths of two souls cross. They looked down at the two souls who still seem enchanted by their beauty. Their lights started to flicker more and soon after more fireflies joined them. The two souls are now surrounded by countless fireflies who seem delighted that the two souls will finally see each other. The fireflies waited for the moment when the two souls will finally meet each other’s eyes.

They didn’t wait long because few seconds after, they saw how both of them removed their gazes from them. They saw how a pair of light brown eyes meets a pair of dark brown eyes. The universe seems to stop as all that matters now is they have finally met after a long time. Only their hearts beat can be heard.

The fireflies continue to flicker their lights brighter as they waited full of anticipation on what will going happen next.

Author’s note: And they have finally met, Daragon shippers are you still alive? I had a hard time writing this chapter. I want them to meet in a special way. And while thinking of a plot for this chapter, I suddenly remembered fireflies. So I searched the net for myths and legends about fireflies and I found this Japanese myth. I hope you enjoyed reading it.

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See you on the next chapter maybe after…hmmmm….it depends on your response to this chapter…kekeke

HENGSHO linlin_10 ^___________________^