She listened to me.

She doesn’t disturb me at all.

I've driven a dash of fear into her heart, which is necessary for me to keep my distance as I protect her; however, I'm inclined to regret what I said, because giving someone fear isn't something I willingly want to pursue. I want people to treat me distantly. Even fear requires a range of connection.

I’ve earned my proper place as her bodyguard. By the end of the week, the Capital warranties have left her door. Throughout every day, I am responsible for her the second she wakes up and the minute she falls asleep. Even while she is sleeping and I am tempted to slumber, I have to keep myself awake. I nap whenever I get the chance, but it only totals to three hours of unconscious rest a day.

The Capital understands how grueling it can be to guard someone, so they give me a drink to take whenever I grow lethargic. It works for a few hours, but then the somnolence hits me harder. The drink becomes my medicine. My body has become my weakness.

In order to stay healthy, the foods I consume are mostly fruits and vegetables. The water I drink during practice is mixed with honey and lemon. While I practice with the Capital’s own, I make sure to avoid straining my body.

During one session with my practice partner, I lose sight of his weapon and stumble in the wrong direction. His rod punches my chest and pushes the air out of me. I gasp and fall to the ground.

“Are you all right?” He asks me worriedly. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to do that.”

“It’s fine,” I cough. “I wasn’t paying attention.”

“Have you been taking the drink?”

I didn’t take it last night, but I don’t tell him that. “Yes.”

“Here,” he offers me his hand. I let him pull me up, and then I pat away the dirt on my clothes. The area of my chest where his rod hit me is burning and stinging. I watch him put the rods away. Although he has an innocent face, his strength had been surprising. “Does it hurt?” He asks.

“No,” I lie. He pats me on the shoulder. I flinch. “I’m going to the restroom.”

“Sure. Won’t Nari be back from lunch soon?”

I jog away. “In ten minutes.” I find the restroom, which is nothing glorious compared to the guest room I had stayed in for a night. Still, when placed in juxtaposition to what the Nights and I had to use, it’s clean.

I pull off my shirt and tenderly touch the bruise forming on my chest. On the mirror, it looks like the beginnings of an ugly purple mass. The bruise lies right over where my tattoo had been.

I have to smile. Even here, the mark of the crescent moon haunts me.

I wear my shirt and splash water on my face. I return to the grounds, where I see my partner conversing with a member of the Capital’s own. Behind him, I see Nari approaching the grounds with two of the Capital’s own at her heels. I refrain from groaning and grab my things before running to meet her. I bow.

“You’re wet,” she comments. I raise my head. She swallows. “We’re good,” she tells the men beside her. They bow and walk away. I follow her inside the Capital. She enters the library, where she chooses a seat near the window and opens the book she must have saved on the floor. I stand a few feet away from her with my back against the wall. I can see the entire length of the library from my position. I would be in a vulnerable state if it weren’t for the tall bookshelves that block me from being hit by ranged weapons.

I wonder when Han and the Nights will arrive. I know they’ll come since my being in the Capital was part of his plan, but I don’t know how long he expects me to wait. I should have asked him, but knowing Han, he would have told me to do my job regardless of the amount of time passing.

Nari reads for two hours. My legs grow stiff, so I move to a different space on the wall and wait there. I can feel the knife in my boot. I had been given the knife the same day the Capital’s own had ceased guarding her door. It’s nothing like the knives we Nights keep, but it functions.

Nari glances up at me when I change positions, but she doesn’t say anything. Another hour passes before she closes her book and stands up. She walks out of the library, so I do, as well.

My chest hurts even more. Nari goes to the quarters of the Capital workers and requests dinner to be served in her room. She then walks to the music room and picks up a book she must have left behind.

We don’t return to her room until the evening. She combs her hair while waiting for dinner. In less than an hour, a Capital worker delivers dinner to her room. She places the food on her bed and sits down with the blankets wrapped over her lap. She eats, and then she looks at me.

“I can’t finish this. You haven’t eaten, have you?” She takes an empty plate and puts a portion of food on it. “We forgot to bring you lunch earlier. I ordered more food so you can eat, too.” She raises the plate. “Here. Have some.”

I step forward and accept the plate from her. She gives me a fork. We’ve never eaten together before. I don’t know why I took the food from her when I should be more attentive to her surroundings rather than my needs. Still, I truly am hungry, and I believe nothing will happen in the five minutes when I will hurriedly consume this food. Although it’s hot, I rapidly eat.

“You don’t have to eat so fast,” she says. “If you were the bodyguard for the Capital leader, it would be more strict. But it’s just me. I’m not finicky.”

I set the plate on the tray the Capital worker left behind. At that moment, Nari reaches for the hot drink on the tray. My plate hits the drink, and Nari drops the glass. I catch the glass, but not before half of the hot drink spills onto my shirt.

“I’m so sorry,” Nari apologizes even though it was my fault. I give her the half empty glass, and then I take off my shirt. I wipe the liquid from my torso with the shirt. I go to my room to grab a change of clothing, but then Nari sees my bruise.

“Where did you get that?”

I stop. My body is burning and the bruise throbs even more. “Practice,” I say.

An expression of curiosity and surprise alters her face. I walk inside my room and change into a clean shirt. When I am in her room again, she is staring at me.

“I – “ she shakes her head. “Never mind. Did you get it treated?”

“No.”

“But – “

There’s a knock on the door. I cautiously open the door and make sure to keep my body away from the entrance. It’s just a Capital worker to bring me my drink.

“Thank you,” I say. He gives it to me, and then he walks away. I close the door and gulp down the entire drink.

“You won’t have to worry about staying awake tonight,” she says and puts all of her eating utensils on the tray. “I’m sleeping early. I have breakfast early tomorrow morning with the Capital leader.”

“You don’t call him dad.”

She pauses from folding the blankets on her bed and looks at me with hard eyes. “He isn’t my dad.” She opens the book she picked up from the music room and starts to read.

In an hour, she closes the book and turns off the light. While in the dark, she makes her way back to her bed. I hear her swear when she bumps into the corner of the bed, but then she says, “I’m okay,” to keep me from coming to check on her. After a few minutes, she’s stopped moving and is breathing lightly.

I bend down and adjust the knife in my boot as well as retie my shoelaces. Although I’ve had this knife for two weeks, I haven’t had the occasion to use it. I feel paranoid that I’ll lose my skills, so I take it out and toss it to and from either hand. The glow from the window glints off of the blade like a cracked mirror.

I’m weary, but I have to stay awake. I slit a short cut on my palm, but the pain I feel doesn’t wake me up. I sigh and return the knife to my boot, and then I wipe the blood with my shirt. The new shirt I had changed into is white. I’ll have to dress into a new one before Nari wakes up.

I sleep for an hour, and then I wake up before dawn comes. I put on a new shirt, and then I wait for Nari to awaken. I accompany her to meet her father, who thanks me for being so loyal to my job. He notices the dark bags underneath my eyes and tells Nari that they’re going to have a long morning together. Since the Capital leader has more than enough security to guard himself as well as Nari, he gives me a slight nod, suggesting that I rest for this rare moment. I follow his orders and, although I am only able to nap for two hours, I feel well rested.

During Nari’s lunch I practice again, and then I follow her about her daily hobbies. At night, she reads a book before going to bed. This time, I turn the lights off for her.

The drink is delivered to me again. I wait until the sleepiness hits me, and then I drink it. I urge myself to sit down for just a bit, and then I close my eyes.

I don’t realize that I’m sleeping until a thick, hard sound wakes me up. I jump upright and instinctively pull the knife from my boot. Pressing my ear to the door, I hear the distant clatter of various things falling. I hear nimble footsteps and sharp voices. I glance at Nari, who is still sleeping, and then I slowly step out of her room.

The lights are on, but the hallway is empty. To the left, I hear someone approaching. I raise my hand to throw the knife, but then I see that it’s one of the Capital’s own.

There’s blood on his cheek.

“Stay with the daughter,” he shouts in panic. “The Capital has been invaded.”