It was a grim realization, but an easy one to accept.

We were connected in different levels, and with such connection came the realization that my feelings for you exceeds the one I showed in many occasions.

Have you ever wondered how the two of us clicked? It’s a question that has been asked of me by my closest friends and family. Total opposites, they said of us, but we just shrugged it off ‘cause it really doesn’t matter. You eat using my fork and drink from my glass, and vice versa, so what’s the matter?

The two of us had our share of boyfriends, yours more than mine, of course. We shared infos about them to each other, and give each other advice and comfort when needed. But there came a time when I just stopped accepting suitors, not knowing what I was feeling then.

Our lives continued as they were. I was getting comfortable with you always by my side, except when you have your dates. I just never realized how comfortable I was getting. You’ll always reply my messages and fulfill my wishes. Maybe that was the time my heart started to beat for you?

We were having our weekly dinner date when you dropped the bomb. Your boyfriend asked you to marry him, and then you asked me if it’s okay to be your maid-of-honor? My mind went blank and I just stared at you. Did you hear my plea then? 

Accepting my silence as my agreement, you proceeded with the preparations. It was a year-long engagement, you told me, so we’ll have plenty of time to go out with each other more. I wanted to object, to tell you that I’m slowly dying inside with such news, but I held it in. That maybe has been my biggest weakness. But I was praying that you’ll read my thoughts, ‘cause that’s what you do best, right?

No matter how we tried, our dates decreased in time. I may be the best friend, but I am only the best friend. There were appointments that you and your fiancé opted to do alone, so what am I to do now?

That’s when I picked up my guitar and music sheets. Making music has been my original dream, but then it became a hobby, something that soothes me whenever I need comfort, whenever I cannot get that comfort from anyone else, even from you. 

Daylights were assigned for office work, but when night came, I am with my trusty music. I was not aiming for something in particular, only to soothe my troubled mind and heart, but then, my heart prevailed without me consciously realizing it. 

Three weeks. That’s how long Taeyeon and I have not seen each other lately, whe