“A question for Song Ji hyo-ssi: this is your comeback, how does it feel to be working with your Frozen Flower co-stars?” asked a reporter. Jong kook would have stood up in anger if not for someone restraining him.

 

A hand was firmly placed on his shoulder, forcing him to drop back to his seat. Everyone was just waiting for the right moment and one little slip. The tension in the air was almost palpable. The person who saved him from making the headlines placed a flute of wine on the table. It was emptied in seconds. The bubbling liquid burned his throat, but Jong kook didn’t care.

 

“You really know nothing about drinking Jong kook-ah.” Jae suk sat on the chair beside him and before Jong kook could say anything, few more familiar faces had joined them in the table. He could only greet them with a smile and a look of utter surprise. Hyo Jong recognized the people around her judging from her expression, she greeted everyone briefly then returned to her game.

 

“Hyung…” he started, lost for words. He didn’t even notice how they caught the attention of the media or how the security tightened around them. Jae suk looked older now, but he still gave off that friendly vibe and his very presence was comforting. He was just like the Jae suk he knew from X-man. “Everyone wanted to come… don’t worry about her. She’s the Ace and Joong ki’s there,” Jae suk said with a chuckle.

 

 Jong kook looked around the table, trying match names and faces. He had watched enough episodes to even know about Ji hyo’s love line and he had no trouble recognizing the Running Man members. They were future Jong kook’s friends, the family as Ji hyo said, but he also knew some of them from before like Dong hoon. Gwang soo, Haha, Gary, Jae suk, he sensed the strong bond these people had with the other him, and it was something he wished he had.

 

“Of course it is great to be able to work with my friends. I know the set would be fun, I’d bravely say that the audience could expect great chemistry from us. Isn’t that right In Sung oppa?” Ji hyo said, her smile wide and sure. She was in her element, throwing off witty remarks and diverting rather malicious questions. Jong kook couldn’t have felt any more amazed with her. It must have taken a lot not to feel scared out there. It looked lonely on the stage but Jong kook knew it wasn’t, doing what you love is never lonely. To those in the industry, the limelight was where they belonged. Ji hyo was the same, standing there proudly and confidently. She was exactly the person she is and wanted to be. It was silly for him to worry, she really was stronger than he was.

 

“Neh, of course Ji hyo-yah. Joong ki is a hoobae, but I’m his fan and this is your come back drama so it’s really meaningful. I am very thankful to be here and reunite with the two of you… Ji hyo-yah,” In Sung looked at Ji hyo the whole time, making her laugh with his informal tone and attempt to do aegyo. “Ji hyo-yah…” he repeated, “See, I think this drama would be a success from the chemistry alone.”

“Hey don’t forget me! Speaking of chemistry, I think we looked really good in Running Man –”

“You were considered the SongSong siblings there, right Joong ki-yah?”

“Eyy In Sung hyung!” the crowd chuckled, enjoying the casts’ rapport. “Anyway, I am really glad to be with noona. Like Gwang soo, I really wanted to work with her and the manuscript also caught my attention, I’d do it for the story alone. Gary hyung, you already lost her once to Jong kook hyung, now you are losing her to me.” Joong ki joked while making peace signs to Jong kook’s direction.

 

“A question for the leads, everyone was curious if you had liked Ji hyo-ssi before, Jo In Sung-ssi? Song Joong ki-ssi?”

“Of course!” Joong ki answered immediately, drawing another laugh from the crowd. “I really liked noona… oops, I mean, that’s before Jong kook hyung. Phew, I could almost hear ‘Sparta!’ here,” answered Joong ki, laughing warmly to Ji hyo and pretending to be sorry for holding her hand earlier.

 

“Actually, Ji hyo-yah isn’t my type…” In Sung laughed awkwardly. “Unlike Jong kook-ssi, my girlfriend’s scarier but of course I like her as a dongsaeng, she’s a really special dongsaeng. But in the drama, I am someone who loves her blindly. I hope everyone watches out for who would win her heart.”

“Or if someone would.” Ji hyo inserted, chuckling and completely at ease. If the reporters wanted to trash her image and turn the show into a laughing matter, they clearly failed.

 

The conference had taken longer than usual, but as soon as the questions ran out, Suk Jin wrapped up the show nicely.

 

“Running Man!” Someone shouted as the casts say good-bye. It might’ve been an announcer or someone but Jong kook didn’t hear anymore, a loud cheering erupted and he found himself ushered to the stage. The media all went wild with the biggest family reunion of the year. The members looked at each other knowingly and they were their old characters again, it happens rarely so they might as well give in to the crowd. With just a snap of his fingers, Shi Yoon watched uniformed men run and form a barricade around the platform.

 

“Yah, seriously, I can’t do that anymore! My back hurts,” complained Suk Jin as he tried the famous Running Man pose.

“Hyungnim, do you want Coach Kook to get mad?” Dong Hoon teased. Everyone was grumbling and laughing while Jong kook s to the middle where Ji hyo was. “I’m so proud of you,” he whispered and she gave him a look that said everything. She was happy, thankful, Ji hyo the actress had come back.

 

“These two are too close!”

“Gary-yah, why wouldn’t I be close to her? She is mine! My wife!” Jong kook retorted, acting naturally despite knowing the guy only from watching a few episodes.

“But we are Monday couple –”

“It’s Tuesday today!” Someone again from the crowd, which has now doubled, shouted. “Ah, that’s right, stress!” Gary felt embarrassed but he knows it would help, and they were successful to attract attention.

“Gary hyung you still haven’t moved on?” asked Dong hoon.

“But I saw hyung taking an audience from his concert to somewhere!”

“Yah Lee Gwang soo! Where did you pick that up? It’s not true of course!”

Ji hyo could only laugh, she didn’t want the tears to fall on this fine day. She felt back, more alive than ever. She thought it was not possible to be any happier but with everyone and everything, it has gone to another level. She just couldn’t ask for more.

 

“Hey what about me?” Everyone turned to look at In Sung and pointed at the end of the line. “You could be the guest,” said Suk Jin. After four years, the famous Running Man trademark was seen again. With all the members… and a guest, the Running Man family showed the world what they had missed. The old bickering, the grumblings, the warmth and love that couldn’t be hidden despite the betrayals and drive to win, Running Man hasn’t ended. It will live forever in the hearts of the fans and will stay as good memories, good times that will never grow old.

 

“Oppa!” Ji hyo hugged the national MC tightly. “Oppa, you still wear this kind of pants? I missed you and everyone. I can’t believe you are all here.” The others took their turns hugging their only sister but Jong kook had to step in when it was Gary’s turn. “Why hyung? I missed Ji hyo too.”

“A handshake will do.”

“Eyy this hyung is so protective, but I’m just joking hyungnim, actually it’s you whom I missed more.” Gary contented himself with a handshake with Ji hyo. Then hugged and kissed Jong kook, until Hyo Jong decided to pull Gary away, mistaking the hug for an attack. “Aigoo you’re so cute like your omma. You were still a baby when I last saw you.” Gary said, pinching Hyo Jong’s cheeks. The little angel slapped his hands and everyone laughed at the appearance of bad Hyo Jong, teasing Ji hyo and Jong kook for having a liger child.

 

The table in the corner had become the loudest one. The other people in the luncheon only watched them, it was like watching a live show of Running Man. Stories of whos and whens, whats and hows, were exchanged. Everyone has something to say that Jae suk had to literally MC to ensure the peace. Jong kook didn’t feel left out despite not knowing some of the people with him. Now he knew why Running Man was famous and why Ji hyo loved it, it’s because of the people. Even to a stranger like him, they felt like a family.

 

“I’m really grateful that everyone came.”

“When we heard that you’d do a drama again and with In Sung too, I was shocked and a bit worried. It was Suk Jin’s idea to invite us.” Jae suk placed a hand on Ji hyo’s shoulder and continued. “But I am glad that you are back. Everything’s seems fine, you look really happy.”

“I am, Jae suk oppa.” Jae suk brushed away a tear on her cheek, the simple gesture reminded her of the reason she survived variety and why she never wanted to quit. He’s an inspiration and role model that would make you want to believe that the entertainment industry still has hope. “I really felt annoyed with those rude reporters. You did so well, Ji hyo-yah.” She nodded in thanks, too uncomfortable to speak. With a final hug and more of small talks, the Running Man family had to go separate ways with promises of meeting again.

 

Jong kook Hyo Jong’s hair while the child slept on his lap, his other arm was draped around Ji hyo, her head resting on his chest. He listened to their breathing as the girls slept and used him as their pillow. He couldn’t help but smile. He was so relieved beyond words. He couldn’t believe how amazing she was and how much it helped that the others were there to support her, even Joong ki and In Sung did a lot. Not everyone might be as forgiving and the struggles were just starting but he just knows that they can overcome anything now. For them he would and he knew he wouldn’t be alone.

 

--------------------

 

Jong kook couldn’t help but pull Ji hyo to him, locking her in a warm embrace. He let his head rest at the crook of her neck, tightening his arms around her as if not wanting to let go. It felt so right, as if he was fated to be there. To touch her, to hold her, to love her, it was not just his mission but also his reason to exist. The passing of days were starting to be terrifying, every minute made him wonder when it would end and what he could do when that time comes.

 

“Jong kook-ah, did something happen?” He shrugged but did not loosen his hold. “Let’s just stay like this for a while Ji hyo-yah.” She rubbed his back, her body humming against his. “I always get worried when you attend interviews, or get harassed by those reporters, but you always prove me wrong. You always surprise me.”

“I told you I can do it. I don’t know why are you like this… but I like it very much,” she said, chuckling when Jong kook stiffened. Ji hyo was finally released from the bear hug, her body protesting at the sudden loss of warmth. “Let’s go have dinner now Ji hyo-yah.” She watched Jong kook walk away, wondering why she felt bothered. It feels as if there was a silent countdown, but she couldn’t be sure, nor she wants to know, wishing it were just her imagination.

 

--------------------

 

The kitchen thrummed with activity. Pots in the stove boiled and sizzled, plates, spoons and forks were crammed in a basket. “Appa, I think you’d destroy it.” Hyo Jong said, her little nose wrinkling cutely just like her mom. Jong kook lifted the basket and watched its deformed corners bulge. “I think we need to look for smaller plates.” Hyo Jong couldn’t agree more and nodded eagerly, her little head looking like it was a bouncing ball.

 

“Or maybe you need a bigger basket.” Ji hyo said, placing a huge one in front of Jong kook and Hyo Jong.  She laughed when the two looked at her as if she had just performed a magic trick, looking so similar and in harmony. They gaped at her as she fixed the mess the father-daughter duo created, with ohs and ahs. Even Jong kook looked like an overgrown little boy.

 

With a basket in hand and Ji hyo’s in the other, Jong kook took a deep breath of fresh air. He missed the countryside and it was amazing how the place never changed even after 8 years. It was where he used to go to wind down, write a song or sort his troubles. They reached the spot, on top of the hill overlooking a lake and lush vegetation, where he had laid a hundred times. It was his sanctuary, owned by a friend who told him to come and go as he pleased. He had never brought someone there until now, and it was a joy to see that his family shared his fondness over the place.

 

“Hyo Jong don’t go too far and stay away from the lake,” reminded Ji hyo as Hyo Jong ran after the dog of the caretaker. Jong kook helped her lay a blanket but when Ji hyo gripped the hem, he grinned and pulled the cloth. Causing Ji hyo to lose her balance and before she could say a thing, Jong kook had wrapped her like a spring roll. “Yah! Kim Jong kook!”

“You look tasty,” he teased, loving the half-annoyed face of Ji hyo.

“Aigoo, I really don’t know what you’ve eaten, these past few days...”

“I’m just enjoying our little time.” For some reasons, Ji hyo lost her smile. She shivered at his words, it as if they had much deeper meaning. Jong kook almost looked lonely but he laughed. “Ji hyo, you look like you’ve seen a ghost. I mean we won’t be able to have much time together because next week you’ll be busy with filming.” Jong kook almost told her about his fear that the more she came closer to her dream, the more their time would lessen. He was lucky she seemed convinced with his excuse. He let go of the blanket, falling in a heap around her. “Ji hyo, in dramas… they always do that ratings puller in places like this.”

“What ratings –” before Ji hyo could finish her sentence, Jong kook had cupped her face and pressed his lips gently against her. Ji hyo’s eyes widened in surprise, she froze, her face warmed. Jong kook’s lips still touched hers but he did nothing more, she could feel him stifle a smile. He opened his eyes. Still holding her face, he lifted his head from hers and stared at her intensely.

 

“What?” she stuttered, but was unable to look away. Jong kook kissed her forehead then her nose. He stepped closer and leaned to her ear.

“I love you,” he whispered.

Ji hyo had never heard anything sweeter and more beautiful than those heartfelt words. Three words without buts, no ifs, no reasons, plain and simple but honest. It was not the first time hearing them, but she couldn’t understand why she wanted to cry. It was crazy, she loves him and he loves her that it was almost painfully unbelievable. Who would have thought a beautiful and honest emotion like that could ever exist? And every time she heard those words, they sounded even better and sincere than before.

 

“I know,” she croaked, “my love had been always you Jong kook-ah. But why are you being like this?”

“I told you I’d miss you when you get busy. And to make sure you’d think of me even if you are surrounded by your leading men.” he said, his expression looking similar to a jealous puppy. “Silly! Are you still jealous?”

“Not really, I’m still better… but… maybe?” Jong kook sighed and Ji hyo couldn’t even get mad when he acts so cutely.

“Don’t you trust me yeobo?”

“It’s not that… I just don’t like to share.”

Ji hyo pushed him away and patted his head. “I am yours and you are not sharing me, I’m only yours.” Jong kook smiled, his eyes turned into a curved line, but Ji hyo had never seen anything more beautiful but at the same time bothering. She had never seen that smile before.

 

They finally finished setting up the picnic. Jong kook ran after Hyo Jong, playing catch with her and the dog. While Ji hyo was left under the tree, reading the first script.

 

“Appa, the ajusshi trained Boo well.” Hyo Jong ran to Boo and the huge ball of white fur engulfed her. Her shrieks and laughter echoed as the gentle beast her clean. “Boo! Stop tickling me!”

“Boo… come here, come on boy.” Jong kook showed the ball but the dog completely ignored him. “Yeobo, I don’t think your charms work on males.”

“That dog is male? No wonder it only likes you and Hyo Jong.” He gave up trying to play and walked over to Ji hyo, sitting beside her and peeking at her booklet.

 

“You stink, you smell like Boo.” Jong kook laughed and hugged Ji hyo rubbing against her and tickling her in the process. “Yah! Jong kook-ah!”

“Why? You said I’m a dog? I’m just imitating Boo.” Ji hyo ignored him and leaned to him, using him as a backrest. “I thought you said you want to come here and finish your song?”

“Ah, right.” He grabbed his bag pack and took out a music sheet. In no time, he was already busy scribbling, only stopping when he heard a sniff. He noticed that Ji hyo’s eyes were watery. “Are you crying?”

“It’s quite heartbreaking. Losing your first love, raising a child alone then fall for another man in the process. I don’t know the ending yet but if it’s a heavy melodrama, maybe she’ll choose no one or lose everything.” Jong kook tapped his pencil, the story feels familiar. “How’s the OST?” Jong kook hummed a sad melody that made Ji hyo ache. He closed his eyes feeling the words naturally flow, through the song, at least he could tell her the truth.

 

To my past

We were meant to meet

But fated to forever try and forget that day

We were meant to fall for each other

But fated to end in tears and heartbreak

 

Time had passed, but memories remained

Wounds will heal, but scars will remain

Don’t try to mend, what couldn’t be salvaged anymore

Don’t try to start what ended a long time ago,

We are the past I never wished was true

 

To my future

We were meant to meet

But maybe we will forever remember that day

We were meant to fall for each other

But maybe we would end smiling and mending each other

 

Time had passed, but memories remained

Wounds will heal, but scars will remain

Do try to mend, what couldn’t be salvaged anymore

Do try to start, what I thought ended a long time ago

We are the future I wished was true

 

“It’s beautiful, but it makes me feel so sad for some reason.” Ji hyo reached up to him, brushing a thumb over his tear stained face. “You really like these dual things, han namja, han yoja, men are all like that, women are all like that. And now the past and the future.”

 

Jong kook didn’t notice that he was crying. They were the future he wished was true, the other him was the one he wished would be the past. “It’s a trademark Mrs. Kim,” he croaked, making Ji hyo chuckle. “It’s perfect, the song alone can already make the viewers cry, and I don’t think I even need to act.”

“I know you’ll be great Ji hyo-yah.” He felt so drained. He was into the music so much, into the emotions, that the loss and longing felt so real. He just needed to feel her, his strength and his muse. He carefully moved to face her, not letting her fall as she leaned on him.

 

“Ji Hyo, look at me.” She turned to him, and he lowered his head to hers. Picking up the manuscript and tossing it away when she covered her face. His kiss was gentle but Ji hyo could feel his need, the need to be with her. She wondered why Jong kook had always felt like… It was a feeling that was hard to put into words but it was as if he was constantly in fear. In need of making sure everything was real. There’s a reason behind his actions and words, but it was something she didn’t want to ask, it scared her. She only wanted to trust him that no matter what, they will be together.

 

His lips slowly moved against her, gentle and soothing. She shivered as a gush of wind blew, but it was more because of how Jong kook was treating her with so much love, as if she was very precious but fragile gem. She craned her neck, slowly opening to him. He slipped inside , teasing her tongue, growing rougher by the minute. She felt herself being pushed to the tree.  He tasted of tea, and smelled of mild soap and the sun. If earlier he talked of dramas, now Ji hyo felt as if they were in some real life movie. Kissing outdoors while the wind danced around them, with the melody sung by nature in their background.

 

“Appa, I’m hungry.” Hyo Jong looked at them with a curious expression, her eyes shining and wide open. The two adults let go of each other, their faces flustered. Ji hyo fussed over Hyo Jong, wiping her sweat and changing her clothes. Jong kook tied the dog nearby then went back to eat with his family.

 

“Appa, what were you doing with omma?”

“K-kissing…” Jong kook blurted, looking guilty as charged.

“Why do you kiss omma so long when you kiss Hyo Jong really, really fast… do you love omma more than me?” Hyo Jong pouted while her father blushed and Ji hyo laughed.

 

“Baby, it’s not like that… when you’re older –”

“Hyo Jong-ah, appa and omma loves you so much… kisses doesn’t measure love. Why? Do you feel like we don’t love you?” Ji hyo explained, giving the little girl a tender kiss. Hyo Jong shook her head in response and gave her parents a wide hug before showering both of them with little kisses.

 

--------------------

 

The loud sound of glass breaking into myriad of pieces echoed in the night. It was followed by an anguished sound of crying, pleading for the nightmare to stop. Ji hyo dropped to the floor, her eyes burning with rage. She was about to scramble to her feet when she was lifted in the air through her hair. “Appa! Appa, don’t, please–” A slap cut her words, her eyes lost its focus. She was having trouble breathing, her body has no more strength. She was numb.

 

There was a loud scream. A woman wielding a knife brandished the weapon to her husband who’s still holding Ji hyo by the hair. “Are you going to kill me? Go on! Do it if I don’t kill your daughter first!”

“Y-you bastard… you…” For a while, the weapon was lowered, the woman trembled badly as she cried. “Let go... l-let go…” Ji hyo looked up to witness how her mother ran to them, the metal blade glinting in the dimly lit house.

 

Omma don’t.

 

Ji hyo dropped to the floor. She didn’t see the blood sprayed everywhere, she didn’t know what happened next.

 

--------------------

 

I have never forgotten… I never will.

 

He dusted the cold stone tenderly. His smile was laden with sadness, but it was not as painful as before. A basket of flowers was placed beside the grave, before he sat down on the grass. He patted the mound of dirt, sighing as his eyes warmed with unshed tears.

 

I’m sorry it took me so long… I’m sorry I had to let you go.

I’m only here to say my good bye, I was meant to love you and I did with everything I have…

But maybe it’s just that… time and fate isn’t on our side.

 

I’m sorry

I miss you

But I have to say good-bye,

 

I love you b –

 

Jong kook’s musings ended, seeing a man he knew well walking towards him.