Jong kook found himself immersed in total darkness. He couldn’t even see his hand in front of his face. Fear slowly consumed him, but he tried to stay calm. He called out to Jade, but only silence answered back.

 

“Kim Jong kook.”

 

Jong kook leaned to the source of the voice – it was Jade’s. The faint sound of footsteps echoed in the darkness, but he couldn’t figure out from where it came from. He tried to follow the time god’s voice but it was as if he was floating, his foot touched nothing. “Jade! Where are you? What kind of trick is this?” he shouted, panic rising to his chest. Had he violated a rule? Had the fact that his mom somehow found out affect his mission? He touched the hourglass chained around his neck and tried to check it but couldn’t see. “Jade! It can’t end like this, yah!” He felt his knees tremble until he dropped to his knees, feeling nothing as he let his weight fall.

 

Jong kook saw a light, or rather the light was walking towards him. He could see the time god bathed in light but he didn’t illuminate the surroundings, it was as if Jong kook was meant to see only him.

“Jade where are we?”

“Relax –”

“Yah, how can you just suddenly pull up something like this on me? And what’s with the darkness.”

“It’s a timeout. A warning, through sleep.” Jong kook sat or he thought he did, listening intently to Jade. “This is the darkness of unconsciousness. I couldn’t talk to you in the presence of your mom and I had to make sure you don’t cause a glitch. I had no choice but use this place.” Jade waved and Jong kook felt himself relax, the darkness seemed friendlier now.

 

“Your mom knows that you’re not you, but you shouldn’t discuss it. It could be dangerous.” Jong kook mulled over the time god’s words, a myriad of questions running in his mind. He wondered how his mom found out. As if reading his thoughts, Jade said, “This is my theory. You came from her, you two have a special kind of connection that only parents and their offspring have – the strength varies though. It so happened that yours were stronger than others were, she knows you too well that she can recognize the 10-year-old Jong kook or the 30-year-old Jong kook. It’s not a glitch but can cause one, and you know the rules – you can’t reveal the equation.”

“I can’t reveal… I didn’t but omma knows as you said. What are you going to do? Do I start this mission from the start? And what’s with the ‘shouldn’t know’? It sounded like you weren’t sure.”

“Like human laws, the rules of time have weaknesses. It has to be specifically referring to a violation to be one. To be honest, this has never happened before so I don’t really know what would happen if someone found out. Just don’t talk about it – directly, that is,” said Jade and winked.

 

“Not talk directly… I can talk indirectly –” Jade placed a finger on Jong kook’s lips, grinning. Jong kook stepped back and looked at Jade as if he’s lost his mind but the time god only laughed. “Aigoo, kid… just don’t talk about it directly.”

“Then why not just stop time, why couldn’t you talk to me normally, this place is… scary.”

“You’ve heard of mothers saying they can feel what their child feels, right? I’m afraid the same concept applies here. If you could see me, she might too. It has happened before. A mortal saw me once, freaked me out and I got scolded – I mean, it could affect the mission so better be careful.” Jong kook cringed, hearing Jade talk about others who attempted the equation before him. “What happened to the others?”

“That case when someone saw me, it’s confidential but totally different from yours. There was a case when someone lost all his trace in history, only I know that he once existed. One went back to the present without memories of the equation. Someone died…” Jade laughed seeing Jong kook’s face. “I’m not joking but seriously I’ve been doing this every 1000 years and my records are good – more successes than failures. Don’t worry kid and wake up.” Jade suddenly vanished, yet the nothingness was not silent. It was telling him something.

 

Jong kook open your eyes…

 

Jong kook…

 

As the voice had commanded, Jong kook opened his eyes. He realized that he was lying down on the floor and his head was resting on his mother’s lap. He can feel her hands running through his hair, humming a familiar melody. He nuzzled and closed his eyes just as he used to when he was a little boy. “Omma… did, what –”

“Shh, I know. You don’t have to talk about it and I don’t want to know.” She his back and he wondered if his mother knew everything or it had just been a dream. “Jong kook-ah, my poor son… you’ve always tried your best. I know even when you were young that you would always keep everything in. Always blaming yourself for things you can’t do.”

“I caused you a lot of troubles omma.”

“I know that you tried not to. It’s because you were trying so hard but you couldn’t fix everything. I didn’t care if you weren’t the smartest or perfect. I’ll always cherish you.” Jong kook felt himself relax and give in, and he started to mumble until those turned into rantings. “It had been hard. I was scared. I didn’t know how I became like that… I was terrified of what I had become. I saw abeoji in me. You, hyung, Ji hyo, Hyo Jong – every day I am scared of what else I’ll find out. Of what else I broke… and I… I didn’t know what to do.” His mother soothed him, her hand never stopping the caresses on his back. He bit his lip to stop himself, not wanting to abuse the favor Jade did him – the time god allowed him to talk of things, indirectly. Even though he couldn’t tell her everything, it was more than enough. Her touch, her words, the silent understanding, the way everything was unconditional – it pieced him back together. He had found his heart and soul with Ji hyo, and himself with his mom.

 

 “Omma… thank you and I’m sorry we had to be like this.” The old woman shook her head and helped Jong kook sit up. “Even though there are some memories I wish you didn’t have, I don’t regret anything. And Jong kook, you’re not your abeoji.”

 

The door opened and Ji hyo, Hyo Jong and Jong moon came in. Ji hyo brought in a tray of fruits and refreshments while Hyo Jong excitedly sat beside her grandma, driving Jong kook away, and making him scram to Ji hyo’s side. “Halmeoni how’s appa when he’s younger?” she asked her eyes wide with curiosity. Jong kook saw how elated his mom had become. It tugged his heart watching Hyo Jong with her. It felt so surreal, to be sitting here with a family of his own, when before it had only been him, his hyung and his mom. He felt Ji hyo’s hand on his, turning to her he gave her a quick kiss before he could stop himself.

 

“Since when were you like this… kissing me in front of your omma, but were you crying yeobo?” she asked, almost in a whisper. “A bit, I fell asleep for a while Ji hyo-yah.”

“We took a long time in the kitchen to give you and omma time. Jong moon’s shy but he’s funny, Hyo Jong loves him.” Hyo Jong’s laughter echoed in the house, she was holding her little tummy and was rolling on the floor in fits of laughter. “Baby, what happened? Omma, what did you tell her?” he asked amused and embarrassed at the same time. His childhood had been pretty rough and full of incidents he would rather have buried.

 

“I just told her how you used to be like Gwang soo.” she said and even Ji hyo laughed. He recalled Gwang soo being the lanky and clumsy man in Running man and wondered how they could be alike. “Hyo Jong-ah my dear, your appa used to be so clumsy that I had to keep everything away so he wouldn’t get into accidents. There was even a time when he accidentally drank mosquito repellant and blamed it for his small voice,” Sang Hae said, eyeing her son who had gone red with embarrassment.

 

“Omma… why don’t you tell them how awesome I was? I was the king of dakji here. I could outrun all the kids… I was famous.”

“Sure you are nae adeul, but before that you weren’t so commander like. Before you could outrun everyone, I had already become a master in first aid, treating your wounds and all,” she said and then turned to Hyo Jong. “Dear, your appa would always wander around in the forest. When he got home… he’d be as dark as charcoal, his hair worse than a bird’s nest and he would smell like vinegar and at night I would scrub him so hard that the water would turn black…” Hyo Jong continued to laugh and soon Jong kook was actively spilling his not so glamorous childhood with everyone. He was a normal child, got dirty and bruised, got into fights, and ran around. He realized his childhood had been happy. His mother had worked hard to make it that way despite the hindrances.

 

They were all having a good time when the door opened revealing a surprised Jong Myung. He bowed to Ji hyo and greeted his mother then sat down facing away from Jong kook. Hyo Jong got quiet and stared at the leaner version of her appa.

 

“Hyo Jong-ah, he’s your samchon go and greet him,” said Ji hyo. Hyo Jong sighed and slowly walked towards her uncle, took his hand and pulled it to get his attention. She bowed low and smiled to him. “Anyeohaseyo, I’m Kim Hyo Jong… s-samchon.” Jong Myung smiled back and patted her head to the little one’s delight. His brother had greeted everyone but him.

 

“Jong Myung, your brother –”

“Jong Moon-ah, come to the kitchen for a while,” said Jong Myung, cutting of his mother. Then he stood up and left. Jong moon looked troubled, his eyes looking into a distance. He quietly stood up but Sang Hae stopped him and nodded to her son Jong kook. “Jong Moon, let me go instead,” Jong kook said, understanding his mom’s actions.

 

Entering the kitchen, Jong kook noticed how it had been the same since the last time he was there. He found his hyung washing rice, completely ignoring him. “Hyung, I’m home.”

“Why are you here?” the older one replied coldly. “And you even brought them so I can’t throw you out.” Those words made him stop his attempt to get closer. The only solace he found was that his hyung might be mad at him but cared about Ji hyo and Hyo Jong. He sighed, wanting to reach out and fix everything, but didn’t know how. He had always looked up to the older one, the one who’s good at fixing his troubles. Jong kook had always been the one listening, while Jong Myung quietly took the responsibility of becoming the man of the house. His hyung always had been the silent presence that kept their family together.

 

“When I was younger, things were easier. I made troubles but they were smaller, and you always fixed them for me… now I’m trying to fix them myself.” His hyung never gave any indication that he was listening but Jong kook continued. “I did something stupid… I’ve had thoughts I’m ashamed of.”

“Those thoughts weren’t exactly false… we were burdens to you. I had always been sorry about that.”

“No don’t hyung, I mean, I had thought of those things, said them… regretted them.” The older one said nothing, he didn’t even look at Jong kook. “I’m really sorry hyung.”

 “Even before… I always ended up forgiving you,” the older one said, finally facing Jong kook with a faint smile. “Ji hyo and Hyo Jong, they looked very happy, I’m glad. I was just waiting for this... you have a beautiful family.” Jong kook looked up to his hyung, not quite believing what he heard.  

 

“You’re probably thinking why, I know how you’re mind works Jong kook-ah. These things, sorry, thank you, they are words that are hard to say… I’m thankful to you, I’m sorry to you… it’s harder the more you mean them. Harder the more the recipient matters to you.” His hyung stopped chopping and cocked his head to the backyard. “Why don’t you put those muscles of yours into good use and chop some wood?”

“Neh, hyung.” Jong kook went to the backyard and picked up a familiar axe. He placed firewood on the tree stump and swung but missed. He tried again but missed. It felt like the old times… like that day he made his promise. “Jong kook-ah, how are you going to chop those woods if you’re crying?” said Jong Myung and tossed a face towel at his brother.

 

----------Fragments of Memories: 12----------

 

“Jong kook-ah, have you finished cleaning up?” asked Jong Myung as he moved around the kitchen. “Neh, hyung can I go –”

“Go chop some wood then, omma will be home soon,” said the older boy to his younger brother who could only grumble in silent protest. The younger one went out and grabbed the axe clumsily, almost injuring himself. “Aissh, what’s this, why do I have to do this… everyone’s playing and I –” Jong kook stopped and pretended to focus on the wood as he heard the door open. He could feel his brother’s eyes on him. He raised the axe and swung downward, but missed. “Aw!” he exclaimed as a knuckle softly landed on his head. “You’d never finish this if you keep on grumbling.”

“I’m not…” his hyung snatched the axe from him and effortlessly chopped the wood into two. “Jong kook-ah, why couldn’t do this earlier when you had always done this before better than me?”

“Because…” young Jong kook lowered his head. His hyung had always told him to put their family first ever since their dad left them. His hyung had always been the strong one, the one his mom depended on, and he was just the kid who got into troubles.

 

“Cleaning the house, chopping firewood, cooking, studying… they’re easy,” said Jong Myung. Jong kook felt annoyed, he had never resented his hyung and always tried his best to follow him. The older one had always been kind and understanding but he hated being compared to him, and now his hyung is asking him why things are easy? “I’m not like you hyung. Even people said I’m going to turn out like abeoji,” he retorted spitefully. He hated it how people always said he’d be like his dad, he wanted to prove them wrong but always ended up being like his father, the one who broke hearts.

 

“They are easy because I think of you and omma when I do them. Jong kook-ah, I get tired too, I also want to run away. Sometimes, I get scared… but when I think of you and how omma have it worst, it becomes easier.” Jong kook fell silent and averted his gaze. His hyung had really grown up, saying things that always struck him deeply and made him think. “We’d always be hyung and dongsaeng.”

 

 “Hyung let me try.” The older one gave the axe to Jong kook then stepped to the side. “Hyung, I’ll try. I promise I’ll try, no, do my best like you, for omma and for you. I… I won’t be like that man.” Jong kook raised the axe and swung, splitting the firewood perfectly in the middle.

 

----------End of Flashback---------

 

Jong kook wiped his face and raised the metal tool. He swung downward and like before, split the wood perfectly into half. “See, it’s easy Jong kook-ah. It’s not just omma and me now, there’s Ji hyo and Hyo Jong too.” Jong Myung went back inside the house leaving Jong kook to chop more wood. Like always, his hyung had his way of saying things.

 

--------------------

 

 “I’m glad all is well,” said Ji hyo as they drove home. Jong kook held her hand and placed a tender kiss on it. He felt so complete, so happy that he couldn’t wish for anything else. “Hyo Jong-ah, had you…”

“She’s sleeping yeobo.” Ji hyo said in a hushed tone. “I heard bits of things with your mom and your brother, you’ve done so well… I think you’ve changed or maybe you’re naturally like this? Smooth-talker...”

“Thank you,” he said with a grin, twining her fingers in his. “You gave me the courage to go there. Sorry, thank you, I love you, mianhe, gomawo, saranghae… These past few days, I learned what they really mean, how to mean them… things that were hard, it’s easier now.”

“Aigoo, you can write scripts already, you know.”

“I’m just thankful… happy. I only wish now to be by your side for a really, really long time.”

“Yah, Kim Jong kook, why are talking like you’re going away? I’d tie you up first before you can leave us. I’ll lock you up and make sure you can’t vanish… you think after everything that we went through I’d let you just go?” Jong kook chuckled, even if his heart was aching. He wished they were strong enough to challenge time. “Pfft, tie me up? I won’t be going anywhere Ji hyo-yah, but if you want… you could. Just make it loose.”

“Ommo, how erted.”

“Aigoo, I think it’s you who is…” he joked making Ji hyo laugh in mock disbelief.

 

“Seung Im-ah, I’m in love, I don’t think I can ever be sad again,” unless I lose you, so let me make you feel how much you matter to me. “So let me love you, cheesy or not, let me make you not regret anything.” Ji hyo looked at him smiling brightly, her eyes no longer tired, no longer anguished, and he only wished to see her like that for always.

 

----------Teaser----------

“Yah, Song Jong kook! Are you really going to be like this?” Jong kook turned to his side and groaned when a pillow hit him where it hurts. “Ow, Song Ji hyo… why?”

 

“Don’t be too difficult. My choice is final.”

“But –” Ji hyo turned to Jong kook, giving him a scary look that made him gulp down all his whining.

 

---

 

The last part is a sort of teaser because I like giving cliffhangers that well, uh, makes you look forward to the next one?

I hope you enjoyed this chapter :) and sorry if I made some of you nervous last time, I didn’t know it would have that effect ^^

I cut a lot of parts on this chap... I hope it wasn't too awkward and boring since it's just a continuation of last chap. Thanks for reading! ^^