-이특.EE TEUK-

 

How am I supposed to wake up these kids!

 

Being an omma of these many kids is hard! I should think of getting a divorce and leave them alone with their appa.

 

Slap.

 

Okay, okay. Time to wake up these lazy bums. Since some ghost took the golden book to use it to wake up his friends from the dead, I guess I’ll have to use whatever I have now to them up.

 

I’m fully prepared here. Along my belt, there’re all the weapons I need. Not to mention the helmet on my head to protect my head, the iron mask on my face to save my face and a few other safety gears. Just to make sure I’m still alive after waking up these kids from their deep sleep. How did you expect I lived until this day then if it weren’t for all these safety gears?

 

So, what will be the easiest way to wake up all of them, fast?

 

Should I set the dorm on fire? I bet that’ll make all of them wake up in an instant!

 

But then again, they’re not wearing pyjamas that are protective again fire and burns. Aisy. Maybe I should suggest that to the manager later.

 

I guess that I have to do it manually then.

 

Let’s start with the easiest, shall we?

 

Knock. Knock.

 

Right. Like anyone would open the door.

 

There you go. Yesung, Ryeowook and Kibum sleeping on their respective beds with their pajamas. Oh, who knew my kids are this adorable.

 

Well, time to wake up, kids!

 

“Yesung ah! Ryeowook ah! Kibum ah! Wake up!!!” I screamed to the air. Since these guys wake up easily, I just need to scream loudly.

 

But none of them is showing any movements.

 

Ergh. I might be wrong today. The guys are probably too tired.

 

Since Wookie won’t be mad at me even after whatever I do to him to wake him up, I’ll start with him.

 

“Wookie ah. Wake up.” I shake him.

 

“Urgh. Hyung. Why so early? What time is it? Urgh.” Ryeowook mumbles, but shows no signs of waking up.

 

“Wookie ah, you better wake up, or you’ll get the duct tape.” I warn him. Actually, I’m hoping he won’t wake up, so that I can use the duct tape on him. Hihi. It’s always fun to prank the members! Hey, I’m their omma after all!

 

“Hmm..whatever…” Ryewook mumbles softly, still not opening his eyes.

 

Now is the time!!!

 

I take out the duct tape, cut a length out of it, and stick it FIRMLY on his left leg.

 

And then…

 

“Argh! Hyung….” Yep! You can say that he’s awake now! Just need to pull some of his hair legs with the tape, and tadaa! You get an awaken Ryeowook.

 

What a great formula!

 

And he’s not even mad at me! Oh, our sweet eternal magnae!

 

See, told you he’s easy to wake up. After you use the duct tape, of course.

 

“Wookie ah. Could you help me and cook breakfast? We need to move fast. I’ll go wake up the others. Thanks.” I said to him

 

Now, get Yesung’s turtle and put it by the window.

 

“Yesung ah. Your turtle is going to commit suicide! You better wake up now before he falls from the 12^thfloor!!!” I shouted to him.

 

Upon hearing about his turtle, he immediately jumps out of his bed and run towards his beloved dog-turtle.

 

“Huh? My turtle! Don’t kill yourself first! I’ll make sure you get married first and have grandchildren before you can kill yourself!” Yesung said while taking his turtle back to it’s ‘home’ before it can commit ‘suicide’.

 

Yup. That’s really easy.

 

“Aisy.” And then there’s Kibum.

 

No need to wake Kibum up by myself. Yesung’s continuous and unremitting lecture to his turtle on why the turtle can’t commit suicide is already enough to make Kibum wake up from his sleep and go clean himself up.

 

I love this room!

 

Let us move on to Kyu’s, Minnie’s and Hyuk’s room.

 

Dumdumdumdumdumdumdumdumdumdumdumdumdum.

 

Ignore me. I’m just playing some beats in my mind.

 

As I reach the door knob, I turn it and jajannn!!! There are bodies lying on the bed.

 

One,… eyh? Sorry, there’s only one body here. Where’s Hyuk? Of course, must be sleeping with Donghae. But where’s the evil baby then? Right, he must be at the 24-hour video game store downstairs, probably checking out a new game. That magnae, he sure can wake up early just for the love of his life – his games.

 

“Sungmin. Minnie ah~~~” I whisper quietly to his ears. But before that, I ensured that my helmet and mask is tight enough to protect me.

 

You don’t know how Sungmin’s reflex system is upon being shocked or being woken up by someone. You can literally say that waking up Sungmin is equal to offering yourself to be beaten up by a martial artist.

 

Well, an omma got to do what an omma got to do.

 

“Sungmin ah. Wake up…” I keep whispering slowly to him. He’s quite hard to wake up, but once he does, who knows which item in the room will be broken because of his reflex.

 

Aisy. Still not waking up.

 

I guess I have to use one of his underwear from closet. Hmm. Let’s see, which one shall be used today? Ahh, this one!

 

Why his boxers you ask me? Well, it’s one of the easy things to throw while I’m standing far away from him. To avoid from being smacked by him, of course.

 

Hana, dul…

 

And there goes the flying underwear, thrown by me who’s standing at a safe distance of 5 feet away from him.

 

And finally it lands on his face.

 

“Yeah! Huh!” Sungmin springs up from his bed upon the feel of the underwear suddenly touching his delicate skin, and starts to perform his martial arts randomly, with FULL force, and with the boxer STILL covering his face. Use your imagination a bit to imagine this.

 

See what I mean? Imagine if I stood near him while waking him up before. Urgh. That just sent shivers to my spine.

 

After a few moments, he finally realizes what he’s doing with an underwear on his face. Owh, our sweet pumpkin.

 

“Ergh. Not again, Teukie hyung! Can’t you use something else to wake me up? I promise I won’t beat you up if you wake me up gently. Really.” He said.

 

“Yeah, right. Come on, help me wake the others. We’re going to be late to the gym.” I asked him to follow me to the next room.

 

Knock. Knock.

 

Okay, of course no one is going to open the door up. I’ll just let myself in with Sungmin.

 

Tadaa!

 

There he is. Lying on the bed with ONLY a blanket covering him.

 

Yup. It’s Shin Donghee.

 

“Shindong ah! Wake up! We need to go now!” I shouted at him. That’s usually my first step to wake him up.

 

No one dares to go near him. He’s sleeping with no clothes on, for god’s sake! Who’s going to go near him to wake him up?! What if he suddenly pulls you to him when you wake him up? Let me remind you again, he has got NOT A SINGLE PIECE OF CLOTHES on him except for the blanket. Thank god, the humans decided to invent a blanket!

 

“Hyung. How about we just hurry? You said we’re getting late.” Sungmin suggested.

 

Right.

 

“Shindong ah! I know you can hear us. You better wake up now or you’re going to get the gas.” I said to him.

 

I know he’s awake when he hears my angel voice. But he’s just too lazy to wake up. They’re my kids anyway, of course I know them.

 

Fine. I have to risk it and go near him then, to wake him up.

 

As I walk to where his head position is, I turn around, facing my back to him.

 

Hmm. Let’s see if I have enough today.

 

I take a few deep breaths, and slap my stomach lightly. Yep. I think I have enough today. Good thing I ate some eggs before waking up these kids.

 

Sungmin stands at the door and covers his nose and mouth.

 

And here it goes.

 

“Purrrrrtttttttttttttttttttttttttttttt.” Ahh. I feel so relieved. My body is feeling a lot lighter!

 

I quickly step away from Shindong.

 

Shindong immediately wakes up from his sleep and jumps out of his bed.

 

Oopss. Quick!

 

COVER YOUR INNOCENT EYES!!! PROTECT YOUR INNOCENT MINDS!!!

 

Need I to say, again, he’s ?

 

Ergh. Not a great sight to start your morning. Seriously.

 

“Argh!!! Arghh!!! My nose!! Ergh. Teukie hyung! Even if you do it almost every day to my face, the smell still is immensely strong!” Shindong said.

 

Well, I guess the fart-in-the-face technique works again. Thanks to my gas. Good job kids.

 

Sungmin and I high-five each other and walk out of the room. Well, at least Shindong is awake. Fully awake.

 

Now, here’s where the horror begins.

 

Heechul’s, Hankyung’s, Kangin’s and Siwon’s room.

 

If you look at the list of names, that’s already enough to make all the hair on your hand stand. Goosebumps.

 

“Yesung ah! Kibum! Wookie! Come here for a second. We need you.” I shouted their names.

 

The three of them comes together, looking a bit better than how they looked when they just woke up before.

 

“Neh, hyung. What is it?” Kibum asked, and yawned a bit.

 

There’s no need to say anything. I just point at the last room and everyone seems to understand well. VERY well, I might add.

 

We walk to the last room, and quietly open the door to it.

 

Heechul is as usual, using Hankyung as his hug pillow. Kangin on the other hand, is still in his deep sleep, probably still dreaming about tanning on the beach with a bunch of beautiful models. Siwon is, erm, smiling in his sleep? I wonder who he dreams about. Me?

 

Whatever.

 

Time to get to work.

 

Siwon first. He won’t harm you when you wake him up. But I can guarantee that you need a bucket beside you. Why? Because you’ll throw up. Why? Let’s just wait and see, okay?

 

“Err, Siwon ah. Wakey, wakey. We’re going to be late.” I said to him, hoping that he’ll wake up instantly.

 

Usually Siwon wakes up early, with his alarm set to a gospel song, he’ll wake up instantly. But when I checked his alarm clock, the alarm is turned off. And you can bet there’s no other culprit to do that. There’s only to possible suspect. Heechul or Kangin.

 

So, at times like these, where his alarm is turned off, that we have to manually wake him up.

 

And here’s the point when everyone starts to plug their ears with any possible items that can be used.

 

“Urm.. What is it, honey? I thought we already woke up early yesterday? Can’t we wake up late today? I’m tired. I promise I’ll make the best breakfast for you, and I’ll go pluck a thousand roses to give to you when I wake up. And then we’ll go jogging together, or if you’re too lazy to jog, I’ll carry you on my back. Isn’t that nice? But why don’t you let me sleep just for a few more minutes, okay, honey?” Siwon mumbles with his eyes still shut tight.

 

Yup. You got that bucket ready beside you? I’m sure it’s full by now.

 

Yeah, he sure can mumble lots of slimy words when you try to wake him up. Ergh. I guess the only reason we haven’t expose this side of him on variety shows is because he needs to keep his cool and macho image on stage.

 

Lucky you, Wonnie.

 

See? He’s being so romantic. No wonder girls go screaming for him.

 

Okay, okay.

 

Enough of that. Time to really wake him up, or else the manager is going to kill me for coming late to the gym.

 

Yesung, Wookie, Kibum, Shindong, Sungmin and I surround his bed.

 

“On the count of three. One, two, three!” And the tickling begins!

 

He might look tough, but if you tickle his abs and some other spots, he’ll jump out of his dream in an instant!

 

“Argh..argh,,stop it! It’s tickles. Okay, okay. I’m up, I’m up!” Siwon puts his hands up in the air, signalling that the tickles are already enough. He is awake now.

 

Seriously, his hand gestures just won’t leave him, even if he just woke up from his sleep.

 

Now, let’s separate these two sleeping humans from each other – Heechul and Hankyung. Heechul is using Hankyung as his hug pillow, and Hankyung is using him as his blanket. What a great international collaboration between the Korean and the Chinese.

 

We should be so proud.

 

“You guys grab Hankyung.” I said to Wookie, Sungmin and Shindong. Then I continued, “Yesung, Kibum and I will take Heechul.”

 

The only way to separate these two is by physical force. Good thing Hankyung doesn’t perform his martial arts as soon as he wakes up, or else all of us would be left with our bones rearranged in random order after waking him up.

 

“And, go!” All of us try to pull those two apart.

 

“Iyeahhhh! Ugrh.” What was I thinking? I must have been crazy before. How can you separate these two? Let’s just wake them up together.

 

“Heechul ah. Wake up! Sohee is here! The Wonder Girls are making a surprise visit to the dorm! Hurry!!!”

 

“Hyung! Hurry! Wake up! Wipe your drool! Oh my god, they’re here!” Wookie also shouted.

 

“She’s cute!!! Sohee-sshi!!!” Yesung added.

 

After hearing the last remark from Yesung, Heechul quickly opens his eyes suddenly and gets up.

 

“She’s here?! They’re here?! Don’t let them in! Nooooo! I haven’t brush my teeth yet! Aisy! You, go get the toothbrush and brush my teeth! You, go get the comb and fix my hair! You, get the make up on my face! You, get my clothes and change these pyjamas on me! Hurry!!! Where are they? In the living room? I can’t believe my dream comes true!!” Heechul shouted while being hysteric on his own.

 

I know. Usually he doesn’t believe us easily. That’s typical of him. He’s too smart. But you only need to use one magic word to fool him – Sohee.

 

“Argh! Ouch! Argh! My back!!! Argh! My neck!!! Argh!! Pain!!!” Someone suddenly shouted right after Heechul’s hysteric babbling.

 

Yup. There’s no other person who shouts broken Korean so adorably early in the morning other than our one in thirteen billion, Hankyung.

 

Apparently, as Heechul was screaming hysterically while ordering people to clean him up, his vigorous movements of his limbs and other parts of his body affected Hankyung. As in, most of Hankyung’s body is being hit by him unconsciously, because of Heechul’s over excitement.

 

Poor Hankyung. He has become the innocent victim of Heechul’s immense excitement early in the morning.

 

Pheww. Good thing it wasn’t me. Or else I’ll be screaming in pain on the hospital bed by now.

 

“Here’s your Sohee.” I point to the Wonder Girls’ poster on the wall.

 

“Aisy! You, Teukie!” He exclaimed.

 

“We’re going to the gym and we have to hurry or we’ll be late. Come on, help us with Kangin here.” I said to Heechul and Hankyung.

 

Yes. This is where the true challenge begins. This is the true reason for me wearing the safety gears. The true reason for the preparation of weapons.

 

Kangin. The appa.

 

“We need to be fast. So, let’s get this over SAFELY as fast as we can, okay kids?” I said to the others.

 

I think I should write my will now, just in case.

 

Oh, never mind. I already wrote them ever since I met Kangin.

 

“Here. You guys do this. Make sure it’s tight.” I hand the duct tape to Kibum.

 

Kibum, Ryeowook, Sungmin, Hankyung and Shindong start to tape Kangin to the bed, using up the whole roll of duct tape.

 

It is the most important safety measure! If Kangin is pissed when we wake him, then he won’t be able to catch us and break our bones!

 

“Don’t even think about it!” Kangin said while his eyes are shut tightly.

 

“Kangin ah. We need to go to the gym or the manager is going to kill us! So, you better just get up now!” I said to him.

 

“Leave me alone, hyung.” He mumbles again.

 

Of course he’s not going to wake up. It’s Kangin that we’re talking about here.

 

“Okay, hyung! It’s done.” Wookie said. I guess they’ve taped Kangin to the bed tightly now.

 

“Kangin ah! Wake up!!!” Everyone screams loudly to his ears.

 

“Aisy. Shut up!” Kangin said while covering his ears. Still with no sign of getting up from the bed.

 

“Yah! You guys better get this tape off.” Kangin added but his eyes are still shut.

 

“One, two,three!” And there goes the earthquake to Kangin’s bed. All of us are shaking his bed with a lot of force that I swear the bed is going to fall apart soon. Very, very soon!

 

“YAH!!!” Kangin screams and try to get up to chase some of the members, but realizing the tapes are hindering his movements; he just goes back to his sleep again.

 

Aisy. What an appa.

 

“Here guys.” I hand some of the members the last weapon that I have with me – the Coke.

 

You guessed it. Kangin’s going to have a Coke shower on bed. This is one of the methods that I remember from the golden book. Ergh. Where is that book anyway?

 

All of us take a sip of the Coke and hold it in our mouth.

 

Hana.

 

Dul.

 

Set.

 

“Purrrrrfffhhhhhhhh!!!!” And there’s the most beautiful Coke shower from the members of Super Junior towards Kangin!

 

“YAH!!!!” Kangin screams loudly and tries to chase some of the members. But the duct tape hinders his movement again. Kangin tugs a little bit on the tape, and finally, the monster is released!!!

 

Shoots. It’s still not tight enough. What was I thinking? You need a thick steel wire to tie Kangin down.

 

So, now, we just have to…

 

RUN! RUN! RUN!

 

Didn’t you hear me?

 

RUN!!!!!

 

“Yah!” Kangin shouts again.

 

Everyone except for Sungmin and Hankyung starts to run for their life before being slaughtered by Kangin. Of course, Kangin knows better than to touch those two who are equipped with their martial arts. Ceh. I should’ve learn martial arts, then Kangin won’t be able to touch me too!
 

Whatever.

 

Now, first thing’s first. Save my life!

 

“Argh!!!” Screams are heard everywhere from ever corner of the dorm as the members run around the dorm, avoiding from being chased by the angry Kangin who is covered with Coke plus saliva.

 

I guess I should be relieved now that everyone has fully woke up?

 

“Mian! Mianhaeyo hyung! I didn’t mean to! Okay, okay. Don’t kill me with the spoon!” Ryeowook pleaded.

 

“Kangin hyung!!! It’s not me! Blame Teukie hyung!” Shindong is also trying to save his life.

 

“Noo!!!! Kangin hyung! Don’t eat my turtle up! He’s still not married yet!!!” And then there’s Yesung. Unlike everyone who’s pleading for their life, Yesung is pleading for his turtle’s life.

 

“Kangin ah!!! Don’t tear my pink pyjamas!!! Do it to Teukie’s clothes!!!” Heechul screamed.

 

Aisy. These kids. Blaming everything on me. This is why you should never have kids. Just buy a Barbie doll. It’s easier to take care of.

 

Wait a second.

 

Something’s not right. Something is still missing. Seems like the wake up call is not complete.

 

Let me make my count again.

 

Wookie, Yesung, Kibum, Sungmin, Shindong, Wonnie, Heechul, Hankyung, Kangin…

 

Aisy. Why do I have so many kids? Hmm.

 

Wait!

 

Where are the fish and the anchovy??? I was expecting to see them sleeping in Hae’s room!

 

And why is that evil baby isn’t home yet?

 

No, no!

 

“Ahhhhh!!!!!” I screamed on top of my lungs. Seems like it silences every other screams in the dorm.

 

“Teukie hyung, what’s up?” Sungmin asked.

 

“Sungmin ah!!! Where’s Donghae, Hyuk and Kyu? I haven’t seen them! Oh, no! Don’t tell me they’re gone missing! Did they get lost? Did someone kidnap them? Sungmin ah!!! What to do???” I blurt out every word that I can think of.

 

“Relax, hyung. It’s not like they’re kids. I’ll go check at the video game store downstairs. Chill, okay hyung?” Sungmin said.

 

After Sungmin left, I run to Kangin.

 

“Kangin ahh!!!! Your kids are missing!!! Where’s Hae, Hyuk and Kyu?!!!!!!!! What do you think happened to them? How am I going to tell the manager?! How am I going to tell the E.L.Fs?!! Kangin ah!!!”

 

“Aisy, Teukie hyung. Calm down. How old do you think they are? 12? They must be somewhere here. Why are you so worried anyway???” Kangin asked back.

 

“Aigoo. Guys!!! What are we going to do! Where are they! We have to get to the gym fast!!! Or else the manager is going to have me as his breakfast!!! What to do! What to do! What to do!!!” I screamed randomly in the living room.

 

“I don’t know if I’m supposed to feel glad that Teukie hyung cares for us so much or should I feel crazy because of his naggings. Hmm. That’s a tough one.” Kibum said.

 

I take out my phone and dial a number.

 

DIAL.

 

“Hello, police? I want to report 3 missing person! Help me!”

 

===============================================================

-하영.HA YOUNG-

 

Oh my god.

 

There are two possibilities now.

 

Possibility #1 : I am famished.

 

Possibility #2 : I am famished.

 

Well, I guess that leads to one conclusion here. I AM FAMISHED.

 

Junho and Kyuhyun keep watching me while hanging their mouths open. I swear that at least a truck can fit into their mouth.

 

“Ha You... Err, Hae Rin-sshi, do you want to eat the plate too?” Junho asked sarcastically.

 

What is wrong with these guys? Haven’t they seen a famished girl eating her breakfast before?

 

Okay, personally, I don’t think the term ‘eating’ is appropriate to be used here. It’s more to ‘stuffing’ my face with food, rather than ‘eating’ the food.

 

Hey, hey. Don’t blame me, or my stomach either. We’re both innocent. Well, who knew crying so hard without eating breakfast can make you so hungry?

 

“Yah, devil. Are you planning on going to hell with a full stomach? I bet even hell can’t fit you and your big stomach!” Kyuhyun said.

 

This guy…ergh.

 

“Yah empty head! Do you want to keep talking or do you want me to drag you to hell with a chopstick?” I said while still eating my breakfast.

 

Okay, guys. The scene of me eating my breakfast here is not that horrible, it’s just that this is my I-can’t-remember-how-many-servings of breakfast already.

 

Seriously, all the tension, sadness and crying took all my energy away.

 

“Ergh. Kyuhyun sshi, I think it’s better that we finish our breakfast first before she grabs our food too.” Junho said and starts digging into his food.

 

Good thinking, psycho.

 

“I think you should say it’s better for us to RUN AWAY as far as we can from this famished devil before she grabs US as HER breakfast!” Kyuhyun said with a smirk.

 

“You know what, that’s actually a great idea. Well, well. Who knew an empty head can even think of an idea? That’s a miracle!” I answered him back.

 

“Yah! You’re the crazy hungry devil who’s eating who-knows-how-many servings of food, and yet you still have some space in your devil brain to think of calling me an empty head again?!” He attacked me back with his deathly words.

 

“Phumphh…phumpphpfrghhhphummphhh!”

 

In case you don’t understand what I just blurted out while my mouth is full with food, you can go check out the dictionary of ‘The Language of The Full Mouth’.

 

Since my mouth is too busy attending the food in it, I think I would just use another method to get him back for his fatal words.

 

And, attack!

 

“Yah! My face!!!” He shouted at me.

 

Yup. You guessed it. If I can’t beat him at talking because my mouth is full, it’s easier to just throw some rice at his face.

 

I know, I’m such an undeniable genius. Who can doubt that? I can fill my stomach while annoying the empty head at the same time. Cheers for me!

 

If Einstein is still alive, I’m sure he’ll be my best friend who’s amazed of my incredible brain.

 

And suddenly…

 

“YAH!” I shouted. Seriously, ever since I met Super Junior, many things have flown through the air because we keep throwing stuffs at each other.

 

This time, the empty head decided it’s the kimchi’s turn to have some time in the air, before landing on my face.

 

I gaze angrily at him, while he just looks down at his food and continue eating. When he notices I’m gazing at him, he lifts his head to meet my gaze.

 

Shoots.

 

…

 

I regret gazing at him. I really do.

 

Oh, god.

 

His eyes are locked onto mine, and I can’t seem to say a word at him. Stupid, stupid mouth.

 

How many times have this happened already?

 

I swear that this empty head is a wizard or some sort. I think he put a spell on me! You know, maybe a spell that says whenever I look into his eyes, my mouth shuts up.

 

Yup! I’m positive he’s a wizard. I swear on my ramens.

 

Ring. Ring. Ring.

 

The silence is broken with an ongoing ringing of a phone.

 

It’s the empty head’s phone. Our gaze breaks, and he reaches for his phone in his pocket.

 

Pheww. Saved by the bell! Well, in this case, saved by the ringtone.

 

“Yoboseyyo. Neh, hyung.” Kyuhyun answered.

 

He suddenly pulls the phone away from his ear. I wonder why.

 

“YAH CHO KYUHYUN! WHERE THE HELL ARE YOU?!?!?! WE’RE GOING TO THE GYM THIS MORNING, REMEMBER? TEUKIE HYUNG IS RUNNING LIKE CRAZYAROUND THE HOUSE, TRYING TO GET EVERYONE TO THE GYM ON TIME! YOU BETTER GET YOUR EVIL HEAD AND LEGS AND EVERYTHING ATTACHED TO YOUR EVIL BODY AT THE GYM NOW BEFORE THE MANAGER COMES, ARASSO?!?!” You can hear Sungmin’s voice through the phone.

 

And it’s not on speaker either.

 

Sungmin’s shouting is just so loud that the three of us can hear it. Ah, no wonder the empty head pulls it away from his ear. You can get your ear to drop off from your head with that high volume of voice!

 

Well, I guess even a sweet pumpkin like Sungmin can get insane with Eeteuk being the crazy, nagging omma who’s trying to get his lazy kids to the gym.

 

After Sungmin finishes his nagging, Kyuhyun puts the phone back to his ear.

 

“Aisy, hyung. Of course I remember that. I’m just letting the trees and flowers at the park to adore my awesomeness before I go to the gym. My sports clothes are in the car. I’ll change at the gym.” Kyuhyun answered.

 

Junho and I continue eating our breakfast, since neither of us cares about the empty head going to the gym.

 

After hanging up on the phone, the empty head stands up and excuses himself to the restroom, again.

 

I turn to look at Junho when Kyuhyun is gone.

 

“Yah, psycho. If they’re going to the gym, that means, Hae Rin doesn’t need to be at the dorm, right? Since they have a schedule. She just has to stay at home. So, she won’t be risking her life then.” Yes, I’m still thinking about Hae Rin’s safety.

 

Junho nods his head.

 

The world is unfair. Truly unfair, especially towards Hae Rin.

 

“But, can’t she go and follow the guys to the gym?” I asked Junho again.

 

“Oh, no! No, no, no. Andwae! It’s already enough that I’m bringing you out here without the agency knowing. It’s good that Hae Rin-sshi can’t go to the guys. Let her be at home, since Super Junior has a schedule. It’s too dangerous for her. I’m sorry.” Junho answered.

 

‘Great’.

 

Why did I even ask? Of course Junho isn’t going to let Hae Rin go to the gym with the guys. At least at the dorm, only the guys and her are going are going to be there. But at the gym, it’s a public place!

 

Mianhae, Hae Rin ah.

 

I get to go to my best friend’s funeral, and yet, Hae Rin still can’t go and see the guys that she misses like crazy?!

 

Somehow, I guess that’s a good thing too, since she won’t be in danger. The killer is still out there. Well, I promise that one day, I’ll make Hae Rin to be able to talk to the fish, maybe through the phone or something without the agency knowing.

 

Poor, Hae Rin. Maybe now she’s excited, picking out the clothes to wear to visit the guys at the dorm, when I’m about to call her now to tell her that the guys are going to the gym this morning, so she can’t visit them.

 

Urgh.

 

I hope she won’t get mad at me for actually giving her hope in the first place that she can visit the guys.

 

Here goes.

 

DIAL.

 

“Yoboseyyo. Hae Rin ah.”

-해린.HAE RIN-

 

This is so good!

 

Did the maid cook exceptionally well today, or is it just me who’s very hungry after going through World War III against a fish and an anchovy?

 

I think the latter is a better explanation. Don’t you think?

 

“Yah!!! That’s mine, you anchovy!” Hae shouted as Hyuk snatches some food from Hae’s plate.

 

Aisy, this anchovy. He hates it when people take parts of his food, and yet, here he is, stealing some food from the fish.

 

I missed seeing these dorks being dorks.

 

And if you are wondering, yes, I am having breakfast together with the two idiots who suddenly decided to sneak into my house early in the morning and fails at waking me up.

 

Although we’re covered in feathers, as a result of extreme pillow fighting, we still have our breakfast before cleaning ourselves up. What can you say? We’re hungry.

 

Ring. Ring. Ring.

 

It’s the fish’s.

 

He stops stuffing food into his mouth and answers the call.

 

“Yoboseyyo. Neh, hyung!” He said.

 

Suddenly he pulls the phone away from his ears.

 

Why did he…

 

“YAH LEE FISHIE!!! WHERE THE HELL ARE YOU?!?! IS THAT ANCHOVY WITH YOU?! OF COURSE HE IS!!! YOU TWO BETTER SWIM FAST AND GET YOUR SCALES AND GILLS AT THE GYM NOW BEFORE TEUKIE HYUNG IS ADMITTED TO THE MENTAL HOSPITAL BECAUSE OF TRYING TO GET EVERYONE TO GO TO THE GYM!!! YOU BETTER HURRY BEFORE MY HEAD EXPLODES BECAUSE OF HIS NAGGING!!! ARASSO?!?!?! PALLI!!” Kangin’s voice pierces through our ears. I swear all of us have gone deaf.

 

No wonder Hae pulled the phone away from his ear.

 

“Neh, arasso hyung. You guys go first, we have to change at the dorm. We’ll go to the gym by ourselves.” Hae said and hangs up.

 

The two dorks look at each other.

 

“Fishie! We forgot that we have to go build our muscles today!!!”

 

“Hyukie! Oh no, if we’re late, our muscles will disappear. Nooo!!!”

 

SMACK.

 

Both of my hands found themselves on Hyuk’s and Hae ‘s head.

 

“Yah, do you guys think you have THAT many muscles?” I asked. Okay, they do have a great body, I admit. Just ask the fans and they’ll say they have the best body in Korea.

 

“OUCH!!!” Both of them exclaimed.

 

By now, you would think that the two idiots are rubbing their own head.

 

Well, think again. The fish is rubbing the anchovy’s head and the anchovy is doing the same to the fish.

 

Seriously, I don’t know how many times have I said it, but I MISS them!

 

But…

 

Hold it.

 

Did they just say that they have to go to the gym? So they won’t be at the dorm instead? Does this mean I can’t go visit them because they have a schedule? Or I can follow them to the gym?

 

Err. Me? Gym? You might want to hear yourself talking, Hae Rin.

 

Well, although I’m not engaged in sports or working out, it’ll be really fun to get to see the others, even if it’s in the doomed gym.

 

Ring. Ring.

 

Now it’s my phone.

 

Ha Young?

 

“I’m going to the toilet.” I said and take my phone with me.

 

“Yoboseyyo. Hae Rin ah.” Ha Young’s voice is heard through the phone.

 

“Oh, Ha Young ah. What’s wrong? Where are you now? Are you feeling okay?” I asked continuously, eager to know how she’s doing after the funeral.

 

“Don’t worry about me, I’m fine.”

 

“Oh, glad to hear that.” I replied.

 

“Erm, listen, Hae Rin ah. I…I’m really sorry to tell you this, I really am.” Ha Young suddenly said.

 

She’s apologizing again? For what?

 

“Hae Rin ah. Just now, I just knew that the Super Junior guys aren’t going to be at the dorm. They’re going to the gym instead. Erm, how should I say this… the agency won’t let you go with them to the gym too. It’s too dangerous.” Ha Young continued.

 

Oh. So that’s what she’s calling me for.

 

Huh.

 

It’s not her fault either. It’s really true that it is dangerous for me outside.

 

Sigh.

 

Well, at least I get to meet the fish and his Hyuk. I guess you win some and you lose some. Just, be thankful, Hae Rin that you get to see Hae today, after how long has it been.

 

“Ha Young ah. It’s okay, I understand. It’s not your fault either. Well, I guess I’ll see you back at home. I miss you already.” I tried to sound a bit cheerful.

 

Yes, of course I’m sad that I can’t go meet the others, but at least I know that Ha Young cares for me too. She keeps apologizing because I can’t go to see the guys when it’s not even her fault.

 

“Okay. Sorry again Hae Rin ah. I’ll see you at home.”

 

Both of us hang up at the same time.

 

Knock. Knock. Knock.

 

“Hae Rin ah! Are you still alive in there? Did the bidet kill you?” You can bet on the fish to make wonderful assumptions on how I’ll die.

 

“We have to go now. Our muscles are melting already!” I can hear Hyuk’s voice now.

 

Ridiculously cute and idiot dorks.

 

I open the bathroom’s door and hug Hae who’s standing right in front of me.

 

A moment of silence.

 

I quickly let go of him before he notices anything weird.

 

“What’s that for? You almost squished my gills!” He said playfully while pinching my cheeks.

 

If only I can tell you the truth, Hae.

 

“Nothing. I’m just hugging you to thank you for scaring the monster in the bathroom away with your shouting and knocking. Or else I would have been dead by now!” I answered him.

 

Hae’s phone suddenly rings again.

 

“That’s probably the hyungs again. Well, see you later! Got to go now!” Hae said and grabs Hyuk’s hand, both of them run to the front door and into their car.

 

“I wonder how long ‘later’ is going to be until I can really see you again, fishie.” I mumble to myself.

-규현.KYU HYUN-

 

Wandering.

 

Still walking back and forth in this place.

 

Aisy. Why did I even choose the toilet as a place for me to think?!

 

Sungmin hyung just had to remind me about us going to the gym today. I thought I could escape that today. Well, you see, I already have the best body any guy can have (you agree with me right, fans?), so why do I still have to go to the gym?

 

In my opinion, Siwon hyung and Hyukjae hyung are the ones who need to work out more frequently! Err, right? Compared to them my body is hotter! In my opinion, that is.

 

Agree?

 

Whatever. Back to the situation here.

 

Do I really have to go now?

 

I mean, I ‘m just too lazy. And as I have already said for the billionth time, my body is already perfect!

 

And…

 

Hae Rin would be left alone.

 

…

 

…

 

…

 

WHAT?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!

 

Smack. Punch. Slap. Pinch. Kick. Smack again.

 

What more self-abuse can I do to myself?

 

Okay, okay.

 

Haven’t I told you guys before? I’m the ultimate gentleman. I can’t leave her alone at times like this. She’ll probably cry more. And who’s going to console her? The impudent driver?

 

At least I can kidnap another kid to help me to console her if I ‘m with her.

 

Smack.

 

Why do you even need to console her, Kyu?

 

Err, because I’m a good, caring, and benevolent guy? Duh.

 

Right?

 

Someone answer me!

 

If she’s alone then she’ll cry again. And I doubt there’s anymore liquid left in her body to be used as tears.

 

Besides, Changmin is going to murder me if he finds out I didn’t help to console Hae Rin.

 

That’s right!

 

I will be a handsome dead body if Changmin finds out that I didn’t help to console Hae Rin when he’s away. Yup, yup!

 

That’s the best explanation!

 

That’s why I can’t leave Hae Rin now.

 

I’m a loyal friend to Changmin, right? I should help him to console Hae Rin, just like how he wanted.

 

Told you I’m a great guy!

 

Okay, now, I think I look like a crazy, hot singer talking to himself in the restroom at a restaurant.

 

Aisy. What to do now?

 

I still have to go to the gym and enhance my already beautiful body.

 

Sigh.

 

…

 

Ting!

 

Yup. You know what sound that is. You can practically see a light bulb at the top of my head now.

 

IDEA!

 

Got to make a phone call to Eeteuk hyung.

-하영.HA YOUNG-

 

Huh.

 

It’s good that Hae Rin is not mad at me.

 

Well, thinking about it again, she has never been mad at me. She’s just too nice I tell you.

 

I guess I’ll go online shopping (that I hate so much) with her when I get home later, just to make her feel better.

 

“Yah, psycho. I’m full. Let’s go home now.”

 

“What? We’re going now? Don’t you want to wait for that guy you kiss…I mean, Kyuhyun?” Junho asked.

 

“Yah! Why would we wait for him who’s probably constipating at the toilet now? Don’t tell me you fell in love with him at first sight! Eww. I’m so going to report this to your girlfriend.” I said to the psycho.

 

“Yuk. You’ve already kissed the guy, why would I want him? Erk. Okay, stop! That just sounded like I’m gay. Ergh, shivers. I’m going to call my girlfriend right after this! Just to warn her that she shouldn’t believe anything you say.” Junho said while getting up from his seat.

 

“Let’s go.”

 

We make our way to the car.

 

And suddenly, as I am happily walking to the car with my full stomach, someone pulls my ponytail from the back.

 

“OUCH!” I scream and turn to the person who pulled my precious hair.

 

I should have guessed.

 

There’s no other suspect. You don’t need to be a genius to know who the culprit is.

 

“Yah, empty head! Are you trying to make me bald or what?” I shouted at him.

 

“Well, maybe you’ll look better if you’re bald. But wait, thinking about it again, doesn’t matter what your style is, you never look good.” Kyuhyun smirked.

 

WHAT did he just said?!

 

I swear if I didn’t remember what today is, I would have chopped this jerk into 99 pieces and give it to Ryeowook to make a kimchi stew out of him! But since I don’t want Sooyoung’s day of death to be on the same day of this empty head’s death, I guess I‘ll kill him tomorrow, right after midnight!

 

“What do you want, empty head? Don’t tell me you don’t have enough money to settle the bill.” I asked.

 

Oh, did I forget to tell you that Junho and I left the restaurant and let Kyuhyun settle the bill? Guess I didn’t. Sorry, my bad.

 

“Pfft. I only need to smile at the owner ahjumma and the whole bill is settled with it.” He said proudly.

 

“I guess the ahjumma is either having eyesight problems or she’s just too scared of your frightening smile.” I answered back.

 

“Whatever. I’m going home.” I continued and open the passenger’s door of the car.

 

And again, my poor ponytail meets the evil hands again.

 

He grabs it again.

 

“YAH! Are you a girl or what, to be pulling another girl’s hair?!” I shouted louder at him.

 

I can hear Junho giggling by himself at the driver’seat. Damn you psycho. Can’t you even help me get out of this? Or you’re just busy enjoying yourself watching this empty head pulling my hair?

 

“Where do you think you’re going, devil? You have to go to the gym too. Eeteuk hyung said you have to come too.” He said after letting go of my hair.

 

What the hell?

 

“WHAT?!?!?! Since when do I have to follow you guys to the gym too? I don’t remember signing any suicidal agreement on that one!” I said confidently, since I know Hae Rin doesn’t do sports or exercising, so she doesn’t follow the guys to the gym.

 

“Today’s a private training session for us. The whole gym is just for us. So, Eeteuk hyung says you’re coming too. And since I’m a good dongsaeng, I’ll carry out his orders diligently.

 

“What?! You’ve got to be kidding me! Ergh. I’m too tired now! I’m not even in sports attire!” I protested.

 

“I have 3 pairs of clean sports attire in the car, devil.” He smirked.

 

Why is this guy insisting I go to the gym? Because Eeteuk asked him to? I wonder how Eeteuk knows I’m with him now. Did he tell him?

 

Seeing that I’m holding tight to the car’s door, reluctant to go to the gym with him, he uses the same method again : Grabbing my ponytail.

 

“Yah! Why do you keep pulling my hair? I know you’re jealous of how beautiful they are, but you don’t have to keep pulling them, you know? Let me see how you like your hair being pulled.” I said and grab his hair.

 

Okay. You can say I did that with some difficulty, since he is much taller.

 

“Yah! Let go of my hair!” He shouted.

 

“Let go of mine first!” I’m practically on my toes to pull his hair.

 

Just imagine how this scene looks like. A guy and a girl grabbing each other’s hair besides a car, outside a restaurant in the morning. And you must have thought that only girls are capable of pulling each other’s hair, don’t you?

 

Well, like I always say, it’s a whole new retarded world with Super Junior. Especially with the empty head.

 

But it’s not like we’re trying to pull out every strand of each other’s hair. We’re just trying to threat each other by holding on tight to their hair.

 

“You let go first!” I demanded. My toes are already hurting from tip-toeing just to reach his head. Urgh. Why does he have to be taller than me?

 

“I doubt it, devil. You let go first. We’re going to be late to the gym!” He answered.

 

And finally my legs can’t take it anymore. They’re too tired from standing just on toes.

 

I let go of his hair.

 

Unfortunately, his hand is still on my hair. Urgh.

 

“Haha. You lose, devil. Now, we’re going to the gym.” Kyuhyun said as he pulls my hair softly towards his car.

 

“Junho!!! Are you going to let me be like this? Save me!” I pleaded to the psycho, hoping somehow he’ll get Kyuhyun’s hands off my hair.

 

“You guys seem to have fun. I’ll just get going then. See you!” Damn you psycho. I know I shouldn’t trust a psycho. I know he’ll be following me to the gym without anyone noticing. I’m sure he’s having the laugh of his life now.

 

And just like that, Junho drives the car away. Urgh.

 

“Fine, fine. I’ll go, since Eeteuk is insisting. Let go of my hair now or I swear I’ll make your head bald in the next minute!” I threaten him. I have no choice but to go to the gym now.

 

He let go of my hair, FINALLY. We’re at his car now.

 

Reluctantly, I open the car’s door at the passenger’s side and get into the car. The empty head takes his seat at the driver’s seat.

 

What is wrong with my luck today? This empty head suddenly appears out of nowhere at the funeral and now, he’s getting me to the gym by pulling my hair?

 

He revs up the engine and starts to drive to our destination.

 

Okay, you know what? I’m going to admit it, but only to myself.

 

Even though his presence today is annoying like hell, everything that he did takes my mind off the sadness from Sooyoung’s death.

 

I mean, I’m not forgetting my friend, but actually, as much as I hate to admit it, the empty head’s annoyance calmed me down.

 

I know I should smack myself hard for saying this. I guess I can use the equipments at the gym to be used for the smacking.

 

Suddenly I remember the cube candy in my pocket.

 

Maybe I should thank him for that.

 

I hold the cube candy in my pocket. Should I tell him I already know that he’s the one who gave me the candy? But then, it’ll be more awkward between us, and that’s the last thing I want.

 

Maybe someday later.

 

Oh, shoots!

 

I have to text Hae Rin. Ergh. I feel so guilty to her.

 

‘Hae Rin ah. Somehow I coincidently met Kyuhyun here. And he said Eeteuk said I have to go to the gym with them. I tried to escape, so I can chill with you at home, but the empty head won’t let me. He’s driving us straight to the gym. I ‘m sorry, Hae Rin ah.’

 

SEND.

 

“Yah, we’re here.” Kyuhyun said.

 

Finally, we’re at the gym. I guess the other members are here already.

 

Huh.

 

I wonder what kind of torture I’ll be getting with Super Junior at the gym now?

A/N – So there you go, finally, the update. I’M SORRY! MIANHAE!!! I really am. Oh my god, I miss writing so much! And I miss you my readers.

 

I’m really, really sorry for the late updates, and my exam is nearing. Too much studying to catch up to.

 Well, since I’ve updated really late, I decided to post this chapter a bit long. I hope you guys don’t mind. Do you?

 And I LOVE YOUR COMMENTS, MY LOVELY READERS! I’M SO GLAD YOU GUYS ARE STILL THERE!

Once again, I'm really sorry for being late.

P/S: 너같은사람또없어(NO OTHER) IS SO CUTE! I’m sure you guys have checked it out! And the mv is just, nice!!!! I totally love it! Every member is awesome!! Okay, enough of me fangirling here.

 Comment replies to my Winglin readers (since I can't log into Winglin) and to my new reader here! :

@iMindi: Glad you’re still there! It’s okay, you don’t have to comment really long if you don’t have time. Just leave something so that I know you’re still there. I’m glad you like the previous, previous chap!!!! Really!!! Thank you for understanding me for updating late! You rock! Keep reading and enjoying the story!!! Love ya!!!

 

@ Kyyra : It’s okay, you don’t have to write comments that could entertain me, but I just need to know you’re reading. Nonetheless, I love your long comments!!!!!! It’s awesome that you like the previous chapter!!! I’m so glad! But sorry that I didn’t update fast though. Been really busy. But I still hope you enjoy the story!!!! Keep reading and commenting! Love ya!

 

@ LiFe’S G0od : You’re back! Of course I care! You’re my reader!!!! I’m so happy that you love,love,love the previous chap ( the 3 love are enough, but I’m can always accept more)!!!!! Thanks for saying that I did a nice job. I’m really touched. Really. I hope this update doesn’t bore you. I’ll be looking forward for your comments!! Keep reading and enjoying!! Love ya!

 

@feeqa : Haha.. I’m happy that you like the previous chap!!!! I feel honoured!!! And yeah, this update is soooooo late. I know.. hihi…I’ll try to think of a punishment to myself, again.! But hope you keep enjoying the story though! And don’t forget to comment, so that I know you’re still reading!!! Love ya!!

 

@sujudork602 : YEAY!!!A NEW READER!! I’m glad you commented. Oww, a dongsaeng calling me unnie. I feel so old already. LOL. I’m so happy that you like the characters so much!! Well, here’s the update!! But I’m sorry that it’s very late.. I hope you still enjoy it!!!! And I’m thrilled to have you as one of my readers. Keep reading and commenting, okay!! Luv ya!

 

@kyureen : NEW READER!!! LOL, you read it again n again??? I'm so touched!!! I feel so honoured!!! I'm glad you like the story!! Make it into a movie?? If Im ever that lucky! Haha. But I'm really honoured to hear that tough. I'm not on hiatus, but it's just that I'm updating late because of school. Is that the same thing? LOL. Well, I don't prefer being said on hiatus actually, bcause I work on the fic at every chance I get. Anyway, sorry for babbling too long here. I'll hope you enjoy the story and keep commenting!! Love ya!!

 

@Starberry : I don't know if you've already reached this chapter to read this reply. But I'm so glad you loved my story!!!! Hrmm, maybe bcause I'm new here, that I don't get comments, or maybe the story isn't to any people's liking. Either way, I still love all my readers that continuously supports me!! Thanks. Keep enjoying the story and comment, okay? Love ya!!

To all my other readers, I hope you guys’ll leave a comment, just to say that you’re reading. And I’ll be glad that my effort is worth it.

 

Anyway, thanks for reading!!

 

I LOVE MY READERS! SERIOUSLY!

 

P/S : Wish me luck for my coming exam. Thanks!

 

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