“Sorry—” I began, abruptly pulling away from him. I anxiously bit my bottom lip and the tang of saccharine from his mouth lingered in mine.

Jongin looked flushed and slightly dazed, and I know I look exactly the same.

“I’m sorry,” I stated again, taking a step back away from him. “That wasn’t—” I stuttered. “I have to go back inside. Mom’s all by herself.”

No, she wasn’t. Young Soo was up there with her.

Jongin furrowed his brows a little as he looked rather bemusedly. “Alright.” he said, reluctantly. “Good night.”

I looked at him for minute and then I turned my back on him and got inside the apartment building with my heart still rattling defiantly against my chest.

-------

The next morning, I got off my room and heard my Aunt and mom talking in the kitchen. Mom told me all about her intention of getting admitted to this rehabilitation facility not too far from here. I think she’s talking about it to Aunt Sora who also told me about this successful and excellent therapist that her friend recommended to her.

Truthfully, I want to side with my Aunt about this. With the therapist, mom would just visit her office and still stay with us, while in the rehab facility, she will be almost living there for the next couple of months. But I suppose this is mom’s decision, not ours. And to be honest, I’m glad she’s taking action in getting herself better.

At school, everything was back to normal as well. Normal as in, the gossips were still on and I’m still on it. After that rumor about my mom, being drunk and driving, there’s a new rumor going around me that I’m trying to get back with Jongin, even though he’s dating this lovely trainee girl. I think it started when they noticed me and Jongin hanging out and talking again. I decided to dismiss them entirely and shut out any questions or assumptions they have about my personal life. I disregarded their muttering and staring whenever I walked past them.

At times, Min Jee and Yu Jin would shoot them with their trademark laser glares and they’d stop and shut up at once. Both of them gotten along pretty well since I was admitted to the hospital. They said they hung out a lot while I was gone. They also added that I need to make it up for them.

On the other hand, Jongin and I were friends again. At least, that’s how I want to interpret our current relationship: Friends.

And since we’re friends again, I stopped wearing the necklace he’d given me. It was pretty dense of me to actually accept it again from him when he’d given it back to me. Seeing the necklace made me think about the night we kissed just outside the apartment building. I brushed the incident aside because I didn’t want him to think that I was trying to take advantage of the situation, or even worse, that those rumors were true. Like me, he was most probably just carried away with the moment and kissed me. The slowly blurring image of the trainee girl flashed inside my head the night we kissed. I spent that night tossing and turning for acting so unwisely. It was utterly inappropriate. Furthermore, the trainee girl seemed so pleasant and I don’t want to be the reason of any of their misunderstandings.

Perhaps I should give the necklace back to him.

------

I received a letter from Han Bi College office after one of my morning classes, the next day. I opened and read the letter in my locker with my heart in my throat. My eyes went over and over the neatly typed words.

I passed.

I passed and I’m going to Han Bi College.

I languidly leaned against my locker and drew a long, deep breath. I smiled to myself but it didn’t felt like a genuine one.

This is strange, I thought. I should be feeling as though I’m soaring high up in the sky because my dreams are finally coming true. I’m going to Han Bi College. It’s what I’ve been waiting and working for years.

Instead, I stared at the smooth paper in my hand, an unknown dreadfulness growing in the pit of my stomach.

This particular sensation lingered on. I couldn’t brush it off so I decided to hang around by the courtyard during my free time later that afternoon. A book in my hand, I sat on an empty concrete bench just under a huge tree shading me from the bright sun light bathing the courtyard.

 “I heard the news.”  I looked up and saw Jongin approaching the bench where I’m sitting a few minutes later.

 “Congratulations.” Jongin said when he reached me. He was smiling but it didn’t reach his eyes and I wonder, for a split second, if that’s how I looked when I first read my letter.

“Thanks.” I closed the book I was trying to read but being unsuccessful because I just couldn’t keep my focus since my letter arrived. “I suppose Min Jee told you?”

Jongin smirked. “She couldn’t keep shut about it.”

“That’s true.” I said, laughing lightly. “She also couldn’t keep shut about you getting into Art University.”

Jongin kicked a pebble on the ground and squinted up in the clear sky. “Yeah.”

“It’s my second option, you know.” I told him. “Art University.”

“Are you going to celebrate?” he asked. He put his hands inside his pockets and looked over the brightly lit and empty soccer field across the yard.

“Min Jee suggested I should. Later at the pizza café.” I informed him. “You can join us if you like. Along with Baekhyun and the boys.” I added hurriedly.

“Of course.” Jongin said, a small, tender smile slowly tugging in his lips.

------

The pizza café wasn’t as packed as we expecte