It had just been a day, eight hours, and eleven minutes but it seemed like an eternity since he last saw Baekhyun. Chanyeol felt his absence with every breath he took. A second without his pup was too long.

Even from before--when he wasn't aware that he was in love with Baekhyun--the hours seemed to drag on when they weren't together. On the other hand, the time he did spend with him sped by entirely too fast. Chanyeol was often too caught up with the guy's infectious smiles that he didn't notice what went on around them until another day was gone. It was alright before, because he knew that when he woke up, Baekhyun would always be there. But now, it has been two mornings without him and Chanyeol just ached to have Baekhyun back.

He couldn't sit still in his chair. He restlessly walked around his office and ran his hand through his hair repeatedly, his nerves causing him to be constantly on edge. Today, Baekhyun would be here at KSE and, looking at the wall clock, he might already be there. Chanyeol called Team Leader Shim earlier to have Baekhyun come up to his office as soon as he arrived.

Chanyeol wanted to go to Promotions and wait for Baekhyun there, but he had so much to say to him--a lot of apologies and confessions--that he didn't think it was the right place to let it all out. And to be honest, Chanyeol believed that Baekhyun wouldn't willingly talk to him if it wasn't an order from his boss. It was evident that he was ignoring him through all the unanswered messages he got the past couple of days whenever he tried to contact Baekhyun. Chanyeol let out a frustrated sigh. He would have seriously freaked out by now if Zitao had  not called yesterday to tell him that Baekhyun was okay before promptly hanging up.

Damnit, he wanted to know more. Where was the pup staying? What did Zitao mean by okay? Was Baekhyun eating well? Was he sad?

Did he miss Chanyeol, too?

Feeling insecure, Chanyeol slumped down on his chair.

Baekhyun... He wouldn't fall out of love in two days, right? Surely, he still loved Chanyeol. Right? Then again, Chanyeol remembered all the stupid things he had done and said. Telling Baekhyun that he loved Kyungsoo, over and over again. Ordering him around KSE. Forgetting their dinner. Agreeing on that disastrous pretend game... That was probably the most stupid of all. How could he even think that it was Kyungsoo he wanted when all that time it was always Baekhyun on his mind? In his heart.

Chanyeol couldn’t deny it. Ever since that bus stop kiss, his life had changed. Park Chanyeol had changed. That brief touch of their lips had brought so much mayhem and confusion; he didn't know what to do with himself anymore. Baekhyun had disrupted his peaceful existence , ruined his carefully built wall with his cheerful eyes and that damned lightstick and before he knew it, he had fallen hard.

He made it worse by making Chanyeol feel things he wasn't used to. Baekhyun made him want to jump off a cliff, hit his head hard, pull him close... and never let go. All the chaos that came with Baekhyun? He'd welcome it with open arms because he now knew that Baekhyun was quite simply the best thing that ever happened to him. And maybe it was late, but he knew it now. They should be together. Chanyeol didn't care about what it would take to accomplish this. He'd be a potato--anything Baekhyun wanted him to be--just as long as his stray pup came back to him.

Baekhyun buried his hands deeper into his hoodie's front pockets, his fingers clawing into the fabric with nervousness. He read the large metal letters above the doors of the place that has become so important to him.

KStar Entertainment.

This was where he found new friends and where he felt that he was doing something with his life for once. This was where he felt he was worth something when people commended him for a job well done. This place was where Baekhyun would hope to catch a glimpse of Chanyeol in the elevators or in the corridors--the sight of him making Baekhyun's heart thump with pride every time.

KSE was where Park Chanyeol was the Ice Tower everyone was wary of but this was also where Potato-ahjussi let down his defenses and leaned his head on Baekhyun's shoulder because he was tired.

It took a lot of deep breaths before Baekhyun could finally make himself open the doors. Seeing the people inside doing what they usually do--the receptionist greeting everybody, the prod assistants busy with their phones, and the other employees chatting away and carrying their cups of coffee to their offices--made him sad because in just a few minutes he would no longer be a part of this.

He would no longer be a part of Park Chanyeol's world.

It was for the best, of course. He kept trying to convince himself that. He didn’t belong here in the first place. It was a mistake thinking that he could fit in. Without meaning to, he had been selfish. He wanted things he shouldn't have, loved what he shouldn't love. It was painful, but he didn’t regret it. He could never bring himself to regret any of it. Baekhyun wasn't sorry that he met potato-ahjussi for that meant he had memories of Chanyeol he could keep with him forever.

He entered the Promotions office and had to brace himself from the curious looks his colleagues threw at him. The stares followed him until he reached Team Leader Shim's cubicle. His superior stood up as soon as she saw him.

"Mr. Byun! I have been looking for you. I need you to do something," the woman said as she rounded her table and stood in front of Baekhyun.

"I apologize for being late," he replied haltingly.

"That's alright." The lady glanced down at Baekhyun's clothes in confusion. They weren't exactly fit for work. She was about to speak when he beat her to it.

"Leader Shim, I'm sorry. I'm resigning from the position," He abruptly stated before he could lose his courage.

The older woman's lips opened in surprise.

"I'm afraid I can no longer work here. If you don't mind, I would like to discuss it with Mr. Kim," he said apologetically.

"Of course," she nodded. "Mr. Kim is in his office. Mr. Byun, I hope he'll be able to dissuade you from resigning. You're a valuable member of our team."

Baekhyun thanked her for the compliment before making his way to Jongin's office. He knocked hesitantly. Jongin had been his first and closest friend since he started working for KSE and he felt bad about putting their friendship to a close.

"Baekhyun!" Jongin greeted when he saw him standing by the doorway. As with the others, his eyes were also drawn to Baekhyun's clothes. "Well, well, well, Mr. Byun. Turning delinquent on us, I see," he teased as he leaned back on his chair. "Showing up late and in informal clothes, too! Next thing you know you'll be sporting blonde hair and singing to that Careless, Careless song on the radio."

Baekhyun wanted to laugh at the ridiculous picture Jongin painted but the urge disappeared because he would miss this. He would miss Kim Jongin and the way he always somehow cheered Baekhyun up.

"You shouldn't worry about that," he answered. "I don't even know the song."

"Working in the music industry and not knowing a popular tune? Come to think of it, I don't even remember who sang it," Jongin frowned in thought. "Must have been a one-hit wonder," he joked.

Baekhyun gave him a small smile and Jongin probably sensed his mood for he quickly sobered up. "Baekhyun, what's the matter?"

"I came here... to formally resign from my position."

It took a few moments before Jongin was able to recover from being startled with his announcement. "You're leaving?" he asked in concern.

Baekhyun felt guilty about the way Jongin looked hurt and disappointed. But he had to do this. "Yes."

His friend seemed like he wanted to ask more questions that Baekhyun wasn't prepared to answer yet. "I know it's short notice and I do have a contract with the company but I hope you will let me resign. I need to take care of some things." He gave Jongin a pleading glance, praying he would understand even though he couldn't tell him the real reason why. "If I stayed here... I wouldn't be able to do them."

Jongin looked at him closely, his expression unreadable. Baekhyun knew his boss had every right to refuse and the longer Jongin stared at him, the more nervous he got. Jongin stood up. He went to where Baekhyun was standing and, to the shorter boy's surprise, Jongin placed his hand on top of Baekhyun's head exactly like he did two nights ago. His eyes held that spark of understanding Baekhyun was wishing for.

"Tell me what I could do to help."

"You've already helped me so much. I just need to do things on my own now," Baekhyun said quietly.

"I'll let you leave KSE but you have to promise me that we won't lose contact, alright?" Jongin patted his head.

"Okay, I promise." Baekhyun beamed at him. "You're the best boss ever, Kim Jongin-ssi."

"You bet," Jongin answered before stepping back. "I'd like to talk more but there's something I have to do--"

"Oh, don't let me keep you. I'm going now. Thanks again, Jongin-ssi!" Baekhyun bowed and walked to the door.

This was it. He was leaving for good. Somehow his feet were reluctant to move and his chest felt heavy. He turned back to look at Jongin. "Um, before I leave... for this last time can I--"

Jongin was already nodding before he even finished. "You can, Baekhyun. No problem."

Baekhyun gave his friend a grateful smile.

One last time, he wanted to go there one last time.

What was taking him so long?

Chanyeol stopped his pacing. To hell with it. He was going down to Promotions to see Baekhyun. He didn’t care what the people there would say anymore. Baekhyun was taking too long to come up and Chanyeol was getting anxious every moment that passed without seeing him.

He determinedly marched towards the door but immediately froze when he saw it slowly swing open. His heart caught in his throat. "Baek--"

But no, it wasn't his stray pup. It was his cousin, entering then staring somberly at him. Jongin was wearing the same expression he had the last time Chanyeol saw him--when he stood beside Baekhyun. He still didn’t know what to feel or think about Jongin's relationship with the pup but he didn’t have the time to dwell on it because he had to go find Baekhyun.

"I'm sorry, Jongin. I'm busy--" Chanyeol walked past his cousin in a rush only to stop abruptly at Jongin's next words.

"Kyungsoo and I are together now."

Chanyeol turned his head to look at the other guy.

"Last Saturday night when the party ended he told me he loved me and I told him I felt the same," Jongin looked at him straight in the eye. "We're together."

Chanyeol got it. He got that Kyungsoo loved Jongin and his cousin loved their best friend back. He always knew in the back of his mind that it was Jongin who Kyungsoo wanted. If it was any other time, he would have congratulated his cousin, told him he was happy for them and for taking so long to catch Kyungsoo. But Chanyeol was in a hurry to get to Baekhyun before the chance at his own happiness became too late.

It didn't cross his mind that if Jongin told him the same thing three months ago, he would have been heartbroken and stricken with grief because back then he truly believed Kyungsoo was the love of his life. Right now, the only important thing to him was to see Baekhyun.

Only Byun Baekhyun.

He had no words for Jongin other than, "Don't ever hurt Kyungsoo."

"I won't," his cousin answered.

Chanyeol was by the door when Jongin spoke again.

"Oh, by the way. Baekhyun resigned."

Jongin said it so casually--so offhandedly--but Chanyeol felt like he was run over by a truck with the impact of the news. "No, he can't."

Chanyeol turned the door handle. Baekhyun can't resign, he thought. He can't leave. I won't let him leave.

"He can. He already did," Jongin said before taking out a folded piece of paper from his coat pocket. "Effective immediately."

Chanyeol glanced down at the letter Jongin was holding out to him. He wouldn't accept it, damnit. He opened the door with unnecessary force borne of fear.

He can't leave me again.

"Are you going after him?" Jongin asked but Chanyeol ignored him.

He was halfway out the door when he was once again stopped in his tracks.

"He's still here."

Chanyeol felt torn between strangling Jongin for scaring him and hugging him with relief. "Just tell me where he is, damnit," he growled.

That forced a smile from Jongin. "He's in his favorite place here in KSE." His cousin raised his eyebrows at Chanyeol's blank expression. "You don't know? He went to the Wall--"

He didn't wait for Jongin to finish. Chanyeol was already outside his office when the other guy called out. "Don't ever hurt Baekhyun."

I won't, he thought as he almost broke into a run. Never again.

It took a while before Baekhyun's co-workers from Promotions let him go. He got a lot of farewells and hugs and pats on the back. It was really sad to leave such wonderful people behind.

Baekhyun walked towards the elevators. One more stop and he was going for good. He wanted to see the Wall for the last time. He had lots of good memories there, too. Going through all of Do Kyungsoo's albums and awards, quizzing himself on release dates and laughing on his own when he got them all correct. Taking ridiculous selcas with the Wall as background and placing his hand on top of Kyungsoo's framed handprint. He guessed he was lucky. Not all Starlings were given the chance to see it everyday like Baekhyun was able to.

The elevator doors opened and Baekhyun's eyes widened, shocked with what he saw.

It was Dimple-ahjussi--the guy he usually rode the elevators with on the way out of KSE--locked in an embrace with... was that EVP Kim?

The two broke away from each other faster than a blink of an eye which left Baekhyun wondering if he just imagined it. But then he noticed the EVP's bowtie was a little crooked and there was a rumpled patch of hair on Dimple-ahjussi's otherwise perfect do.

Baekhyun bowed awkwardly before entering the carriage. It was embarrassing standing in between the two men, to say the least. It was so quiet inside, the sound of his breathing seemed too loud. He barely kept himself from running out of the elevator when it opened on the eighth floor. He hastily bowed at the two men before quickly stepping out. He sighed in relief when the doors closed again. That was probably the most awkward ten seconds of his life.

Baekhyun shook his head. He didn't have much time left. The longer he stayed, the higher the risk of seeing Chanyeol again would be. That would be a disaster... for his resolve and his heart.

He turned a corner and there it was The Wall. It looked the same as it always had. Gleaming trophies and plaques. Large framed posters and artists' portraits. His eyes went to his favorite piece. It was a blown up cover of Kyungsoo's first single. He strode towards it. Below the poster was a black metal label engraved with gold letters:

June 29, 2009. I'll be here.

Written by Kim J.W.

Performed by Do Kyungsoo.

Baekhyun knew what was in there without even reading it. He walked further down the corridor. The displays were arranged chronologically. He smiled as he recalled the day he bought Kyungsoo's second album, what he was doing when Kyungsoo received his first Song of the Week award, and the song playing on his Ipod when Kyungsoo announced his Asian concert tour. So many memories contained in one place.

Inside his chest was a wall of memories, too. But instead of plaques and album covers, there were cars with their own name, pink pajamas and badly-cooked noodles. Instead of framed posters, there were sweet old ladies, bad--goons-kicking assistants, and voice-automated lights. There were, perfect smiles, grumpy frowns, and pretend kisses. There was Park Chanyeol.

Baekhyun reached out and placed his hand against Kyungsoo's handprint once more. It was almost the same size as his but they were completely different, reminding him all that he couldn't be. All that he wasn’t.

He couldn't compare the things he knew about Chanyeol to how much Kyungsoo knew about him. Three months was nothing to a lifetime. But Baekhyun believed you couldn't measure love by hours or years. He may not have been with Chanyeol for very long but he was pretty sure that in this lifetime, he'd be the only one he'd love like this.

He was almost at the end of the wall. Baekhyun looked up at Kyungsoo's latest poster ad for his collaboration with Lu Han.

"Perhaps you already know this but just in case... When he's burning up with a fever," Baekhyun told the smiling face of his idol, "Hold his hand and don't let go. Not even when he falls asleep. He doesn't like to feel alone when he's sick."

He could almost feel it again, the way Chanyeol grabbed his hand when he stood up to change the compress on his head--the night he got the flu from their impromptu noodle-dinner in the middle of the afternoon. He wasn't able to leave his side because Chanyeol entwined their fingers and wouldn't let go.

If only he could really never leave his side.

"I am and forever will be a Starling," he whispered. "Just promise me you'll make Chanyeol happy, okay?"

Baekhyun was startled by the sound of footsteps coming near him.

"Don't cry."

It was a miracle how the down button was still intact after the way Chanyeol frantically kept pushing on it. Where the hell was the elevator? he fumed.

Jongin told him Baekhyun went to the Wall but he didn't tell Chanyeol what time he did or how long his pup would stay there or... damnit, where was the damned elevator?!

There was a ding! and finally the doors opened.

"Chanyeol!" Junmyeon greeted him. "Just the person I needed to talk to."

Before his older cousin had the time to step out, Chanyeol pushed him back in before getting inside and abusing the 8 button.

"Let's talk later." He watched the numbers above the buttons change.

16... 15... Ding!

Chanyeol clenched his jaw in frustration. The doors opened and there were a few employees getting ready to get in.

"This elevator's occupied," Chanyeol said. Intimidated, the staff nodded their heads in assent. The doors closed again.

"Why are you in a hurry? Where are you going?" Junmyeon asked from beside him, bewildered by Chanyeol’s off behavior.

He threw his cousin a glance and vaguely noticed that Junmyeon looked unusually frazzled. But he really had no time to comment on why his bowtie was askew. "Later, hyung."

"Well, this will just take a sec," Junmyeon continued. "Grandma, out of the blue, told me to go to the mansion yesterday afternoon--"

14... Come on, come on, Chanyeol thought, not really paying attention to what his cousin was saying. Ding!

Chanyeol groaned. He pushed on the close button, willing the doors not to open.

"--and complained why all her grandchildren were hiding from her. She named you specifically. You're officially disowned."

The doors remained closed and the elevator went on its way.

"She always does that," Chanyeol replied distractedly, gazing back on the red numbers.

13... 12...

"Yes, she does but the thing is she said she'd disown me if I didn’t bring you there ASAP," Junmyeon explained. "It seems unfair, don't you think?"

11... 10... Chanyeol ignored Junmyeon. Two floors left.

"Then she went on with her usual dramatic tantrums before saying that she wanted to see you before she died and all that. But anyways, yeah, she said you better go there and bring bacon."

9... What?

"What?" he turned his head to Junmyeon.

The shorter guy shrugged. "I don't know she just told me to tell you to bring bacon."

Ding!

No time. No time. Eighth floor, thank god.

Chanyeol went out and sensing his cousin's intent to follow, quickly spun to push him back into the elevator. "Sorry, hyung." Then he hit the close button from the inside with his left hand before he stepped out again.

"Chanyeol--" Junmyeon was cut off as the doors closed.

With every step forward, breathing became more difficult.

Please, Baekhyun. Please be there.

"Don't cry," the silver-haired boy said.

Baekhyun thought he looked familiar. He usually saw him talking with Jongin, a camera always around his neck.

"Byun Baekhyun, right?" the other asked with a kind smile.

What was the guy's name again? Oh, yes--

"Babe?" Baekhyun blurted out.

"Actually, it's Oh Sehun but yeah, you can call me Babe," Sehun said with a chuckle.

"I'm sorry. I just hear Jongin-ssi call you that so I thought--" he drifted off. Baekhyun always saw him with a blank expression, so he wasn't used to seeing the guy smile, and he was stunned at how nice he looked smiling.

"Don't worry about it," Sehun replied. "I'm the one who should apologize for startling you and well, for taking your pictures."

Baekhyun looked at him in confusion. "Taking my pictures?"

"Yes. I got lost again. I got off the wrong floor, I'm pretty bad with remembering numbers." Sehun stepped closer. "I was on my way to the elevator when I saw you walking. You looked so happy and... peaceful. I couldn't resist."

The guy showed Baekhyun the screen of his camera. There he was, smiling as he gazed up on Kyungsoo's poster.

"I followed you quietly but then as you got further and further, you turned sad until you reached the last one and then... you were crying."

Baekhyun felt for his cheeks and true enough, they were damp. He didn't even realize he had been crying. He hastily wiped them with the hem of his sleeves.

"I don't mean to intrude but why were you crying?"

There was something tempting about telling your secrets to a stranger who you were sure you'd never see again. "I planted a special potato but he grew up so fast that he... he no longer fit inside my jar."

Sehun looked at him thoughtfully. "Then get a bigger pot?"

"I can't afford it," Baekhyun said with a sigh. "But it's okay because someone already got him a better one."

The silver-haired guy nodded. "Let's just hope the new owner loves him as much as you do."

For one so young, Baekhyun thought he understood pretty well. "Yes."

"Do you want me to erase the pictures?"

"It's okay. You made me look good for once," Baekhyun grinned at the photographer. "I have to go, though."

"Yeah, me, too. Thanks for this," Sehun gestured to his camera. "See you later."

With a wave, they strode towards opposite directions. A shame, Baekhyun thought, because there was never going to be a later.

His heart sped a hundred miles a minute. Chanyeol wished his feet could take him just as fast to where Baekhyun was.

Almost there.

One more corner.

Just a few more footsteps.

Then Chanyeol was there. But Byun Baekhyun wasn't.

Damnit, where are you? He looked around quickly--eyes darting everywhere. "Byun Baekhyun, where are you?"

Nobody answered. His pup was gone. Damnit, damnit, damnit!

It was like the fates were against him. They knew he screwed up so bad they didn't want him to get Baekhyun back again. But didn't they know that he wanted to make up for it? So much. He wanted to be with Baekhyun--to argue with him, to laugh with him, and to fall crazy in love with him everyday. Chanyeol just wanted hold his hand once more, feel his head tucked against his chin, put his arms around him, and to stop this thing gnawing at his chest because it really hurt.

He felt so defeated. More so when he remembered all the people who were disappointed at him for driving Baekhyun away.

“Why didn’t you run after him?”

"You're such an idiot."

“Why are you like this?”

They filled his head near to bursting. All the guilt, the worries, the frustration swirled in his gut turning everything painful and bitter. Can't I catch one break? Just one break, goddamnit. He could run and run after Baekhyun but how does he get to his stray pup when everything was against him?

Chanyeol caught a movement in the corner of his eyes but the small hope that flared within him immediately died when he saw that it was a different person. Still not Baekhyun. Suddenly, it all became too much. Whatever the silver-haired guy wanted to say was lost beneath Chanyeol's angry desperation.

"You! Are you going to get at mad me, too? Are you going to threaten me with losing everything? Or worse are you going to look at me with disappointed eyes because I pushed him away?" Chanyeol asked angrily, moving closer to the other guy. "Are you?"

He continued to vent out all his buried sadness and frustration at this stranger. "You all say you're hurt because I was stupid and I let him leave. But why doesn't anybody else stop to think about me? Why does nobody care? That I miss him. A lot. No one stops to think that I'm also hurt, more than any of you, because he left me, too!" He wanted to yell and punch something and cry.

"Nobody feels the exact loneliness I feel because you aren't the one he said goodnight to before he slept. You aren't the one who heard him whimper and saw him scratch his nose when he awakened. You aren't the one who watched him while he charmed every single person around you. And then find out that he had already stolen your heart too, only to then realize that you had willingly given it up because he made you so happy. Just so damned happy."

His voice was getting hoarse, it was so hard to speak but if he forged ahead perhaps this stranger would understand a bit of what he was feeling. "I love him but nobody seems to care that I'm also scared to see him because what if he doesn't want me anymore--what if he doesn’t love me anymore? He already let me go."

Chanyeol closed his eyes and pinched the bridge of his nose. What was he even doing? Telling his sordid story to a person who looked bored with the world. I'm turning nuts.

"You're right I'm not that person and all that but... Are you by chance a potato?"

Chanyeol was stunned by the question. "Why are you asking?"

"Because If you wanted to talk with the owner of your, well, jar. He just went that way," the guy said before pointing down the corridor. "Just a minute or so ago to be honest."

The young president stared at him dumbfoundedly.

"I think if you needed to talk to him, you might want to try to follow him now," the guy inspected something in his camera. "The jar owner is Byun Baekhyun, right?"

The name sparked him into action. Chanyeol searched the other's face. Was he telling him the truth? Because he swore to god--

The guy held out his camera to him. Why was this person even allowed to get it inside KSE? All other thoughts flew out the window, though, when he caught a glimpse of a slender guy in a bright yellow hoodie on the screen, standing on the same spot he was on right now.

The silver-haired guy gave him a smile. "For what it's worth, I think you still fit inside his jar," he said before walking away.

Chanyeol was confused about what the guy was even saying but there was no second to spare to puzzle over it. He had another chance to get to Baekhyun.

The fates may be against him, but he hoped luck was on his side this time.

Baekhyun followed the framed photographs of KSE's artists up to the very end of the display--further down the wide corridor--until he ended up beside a large cream colored door. He had never been to that part of KSE before and it was fairly deserted compared to the other places on the eighth floor. Out of curiosity, he peeked inside the rectangular glass window in the middle of the door.

It was a recording studio. A few orange lights were on so he could see a wide control panel and two large swivel chairs inside. There was a smaller door leading to a sound booth. He'd always wanted to get inside one ever since he saw Kyungsoo's behind-the-scene videos. He leaned closer to get a better look when the door suddenly swung open. Baekhyun pulled back in surprise.

There was no one around and the open door was luring him in. Should he--?

He knew he wasn't allowed to. But it was his last day in KSE and he already did a lot of things he wasn't supposed to--felt things he wasn't allowed to--so why not? He promised himself that he would just stay a minute to look around when he went in.

Baekhyun ran his fingers against the back of a swivel chair, leaning in to get a closer look at the numerous buttons and switches on the panel. He smiled at himself wryly. The only thing he understood was the word volume. He walked further in until he got to the sound booth's door. He didn't know where the sudden streak of recklessness came from but he turned the knob to open it. Maybe because he knew that nothing could possibly hurt him more than he already was hurt so he went ahead and entered.

His feet led him to the middle of the small room, where a tall mic stand was located beside a music sheet stand, a large headset placed haphazardly on top of it. Baekhyun came closer and lifted the headset. It felt a bit heavy. He placed it over his head, fitting the muffs snugly against his ears. He looked straight in front of him--at the glass separating the booth from the room outside. He could see a hazy reflection of himself and in this angle, he actually looked like a real singer.

Baekhyun grinned and imagined that he was recording his fifth number one single. That fans were waiting outside, waiting to hear snippets of his new song. Inside the booth, he imagined a guy on the controls and beside him was an older man, the producer maybe. Of course he would have to have a manager, too, so he imagined Jongdae hovering over them and making sure everything was going smoothly.

Who else should be there? Jongin. His friend could be there to support him and Zitao, too. He wanted an assistant-slash-bodyguard whom he could share instant cup noodles with on some afternoons. But the thought of noodles brought an ache in his chest. Because someone else was missing in this imagined scene.

Someone overly tall whose habit was to frown at Baekhyun. Someone who would probably look displeased throughout the whole recording session. But for Baekhyun, that someone was enough. Even if everybody else left him behind, as long as he saw that dark-cropped hair and large eyes on the other side of the glass waiting there for him, it was enough.

That got him thinking--not for the first time--what if he was also a star just like Do Kyungsoo? What if he smiled like him, was popular like him? What if he had a great voice and what if he could dance as great as him? Because Do Kyungsoo was perfect and he was what Park Chanyeol wanted. If Baekhyun could've been exactly like Kyungsoo would the potato have wanted him as well?

Then again, he always went back to the answer he always got. No, it wouldn't work.

Because Byun Baekhyun wasn't a star. He was a Starling. He was a fan who gushed over his idol's new songs, who fell in line until midnight just to be one of the first to get his album.

He'd rather watch than be watched. It was who he was and changing himself so Chanyeol could love him back was just plain dumb.

Byun Baekhyun was a Textile Fashion and Design student. He loved clothes. He loved closets. He could tell you the stitch count of a fabric with one touch of a finger. Blindfolded even. He knew the attributes of wool, nylon or cotton like the back of his hand. He knew next to nothing about the difference between a half and a quarter note but he could tell you where a fabric originated from and when a pattern or style became popular. Simply put, Byun Baekhyun could never be Do Kyungsoo.

But he could still imagine so for the few minutes he had left, and so he closed his eyes and did just that.

Chanyeol stood outside the recording studio's door, hoping against hope that his gut feeling was right. He felt weird as he placed his hand against the slightly opened door. And weird meant Baekhyun was near.

His hands were shaking and he was so nervous. He could be wrong. Baekhyun could not be inside and he'd feel that empty feeling again. He wouldn't know what to do if he went in and found him gone once more.

He wasn't exactly sure what to do if he was indeed inside, either. How should he begin? How could he make him listen? How could Chanyeol make him believe that what he felt was true?

I love you, pup. Please trust me.

Chanyeol entered with careful steps, heart starting to crumble when he saw that the place was empty. But then he turned to his right and that was when he saw him.

He was expecting the chaos, the confusion, the violent tumble of emotions he always felt when he was with him. He braced himself for the storm but none came. Instead, there was just Byun Baekhyun, nothing else.

He couldn't have stopped himself from going to him. Nevermind that his tongue was too tied up to say anything. Nevermind that Baekhyun might not want him anymore. Because, damnit, it has been so long since he felt alive like this.

He pushed against the booth's door and he saw Baekhyun open his beautiful eyes with shock. "Ya, Byuntae," he said almost evenly, belying the fact that he was so afraid this was just a vision conjured by his deprived heart.

It broke him when he saw Baekhyun's eyes shine with tears. He quickly closed the remaining distance between them and cupped his pup's face with both his hands. "Ya," he said. A tear slid down Baekhyun's smooth cheek and reached his thumb. Chanyeol leaned closer. "I'm sorry," he whispered. "So sorry."

Then he kissed him. And this time it wasn't a coincidence nor was it pretend. This time it was real. As real as the feel and taste of Baekhyun's lips against his could be. Real as the warmth of their bodies pressed against each other. True as the thunderous beat of his heart when Baekhyun moved his lips and kissed him back.

The kiss went on and he didn’t want it to end. No. Never. Baekhyun belonged right there in his arms. But there were things to be said.

He reluctantly pulled back an inch and opened his eyes. Now was the time to tell Baekhyun what he felt although he didn’t have the right words but he held onto his pup's hand so he couldn't run away again.

"You left," he said as he looked into Baekhyun's eyes. "You left and took all my happiness with you. All I had were my memories of your smiles and obnoxious laughter. I couldn't sleep. All I could think of was you. You left and didn't even give me the chance to answer." Another tear rolled down. "But you know, it doesn't matter now."

He held on tighter. "You can sleep in my closet anytime you want, for as long as you want. You can play with all the lights in my house until they won't turn on anymore. I'll even let you turn me into a hairy potato and put me in a jar and never let me out. Just keep me with you, pup. Always keep me with you."

Chanyeol touched his forehead against Baekhyun's. "I thought my life was perfect but then came you and now… I don't care even if it isn't. Because I'm with you," he trembled, "And that's all that ever really matters. I love you, Baekhyun. I love--"

Chanyeol was abruptly cut off when Baekhyun drew him down to him and covered his mouth with his. "I love you," Baekhyun whispered against his lips. "Only you." Chanyeol felt his arms wrap around his neck. "Always you."

Baekhyun buried his head against his neck and Chanyeol pulled him so close, they were one. "Never let go," Baekhyun sobbed.

"I won't," he said against his hair. "I'll never let go."