Kris- "There Are Many Failures, But Only One Success"

Secrets Of A Heartless Fairy
 
May 5th, 2012
((Kris))
 
Riiiiiiing!! Riiiiiiiing!!
 
Shut up, damn it.
 
Riiiii-clunk
 
I finally hit my stupid alarm correctly and it was cut off in mid ring. Ah… silence. I can finally fall back to sleep again.
 
Suddenly, I opened my eyes remembering that the manager had told me that he wanted to speak to me first thing in the morning. It was weird that he wanted to talk to only me and not to Suho, especially so close to the SM Town in LA. Damn, there was no way out of it now, huh? I had to get up; after all I was appointed as a leader for a reason. So I did, changed into casual clothes, and left the room, trying not to make too much noise.
 
As I entered the kitchen and living room areas, I saw that mother hen D.O. was already cooking breakfast with Lay who had also gotten up early to help him; while Xiumin-hyung sat on a counter chair complaining that he was hungry and did nothing to actually help with the process of getting breakfast ready. Suho, on the other hand, was trying his best to get everyone else out of their rooms and whining like a little kid about how I was supposed to help him. Instead I just waved my hand at him, telling him he could handle it, while I plopped down on the couch next to a half sleep Tao, who had most probably been dragged out of his room by the manager, and the TV. I mean, the manager had said it was important, but it could at least wait for breakfast, right?
 
Soon enough, Suho had the rest of the members out and about the dorm. See, I told him he could do it. As soon as he pushed Kai into the living room, the younger insisted that he had time to play one round of some sort of videogame while his roommate finished cooking; and opposing the other leader’s complaints, he his game anyways. Baekhyun and Chanyeol quickly scrambled into the kitchen and slyly took a bit of the food, while Chen simply went back to sleep as he sat down in one of the chairs surrounding our extremely large dining table; after all, it was our day off and the only thing that had gotten him out of bed was the promise of a delicious breakfast.
 
Finally, while Suho sat next to me and sighed because of Kai’s actions, I saw a very drowsy Luhan-hyung being dragged hand in hand by Sehun out of his room. I smirked. Of course, the king of not-getting-up-in-the-mornings would only listen to the maknae. And with that, everyone was now awake just in time since the food was ready only a few minutes later and breakfast quickly ended.
 
After that, everyone piled into the living room and started debating about what they were going to do today, since going outside was forbidden for the time being. I had to excuse myself from the conversation stating that I had to go speak to the manager, but I’m pretty sure that no one would’ve cared if it wasn’t for the fact that I was leaving the group with an uneven number of members, eliminating the option to fairly play the videogame that Kai wanted.
 
I was about to lock the door from the outside when I bumped into the manager. He quickly handed me an envelope and said that I was required for some special stages in the upcoming SM Town; supposedly the rest of the information was inside. Then he left. I just stood there shocked at our manager’s actions, but shrugged it off thinking that he should enjoy his holiday too. After all, taking care of EXO was a hard job.
 
So as I walked back into the dorm, I opened the envelope and checked out its contents. I was surprised to see that I was going to be doing a special stage with some other English specking sunbaes; but what really caught my attention was the other collaboration I was going to take part in.
 
It wasn’t long before I was bombarded with questions as I made my way to an empty seat of one of the living room’s couches. Apparently, the group hadn’t chosen what to do for the day yet and were still all rallied up. So while Suho tried to calm everyone down, Tao was the one who quietly managed to approach me.
 
“Gege, didn’t you have a meeting with the manager?”
 
“Yeah, but he just handed me this; said we’ll talk about it later.”
 
“What is it?”
 
“Just some special stages for the SM Town; English songs and stuff.”
 
“Can I see?”
 
“Sure,” I replied and handed my little brother the envelope. He started to happily ruffle the papers inside until I remembered something. “Hey, Ta-”
 
Crash
 
The papers hit the floor and everybody stopped bickering to turn around and see what had happened. It was the type of situation when you blurt out someone’s secret in class and everyone in the room just happens to suddenly quiet down so that they all end up hearing it. Yeah, it was something like that.
 
“Zi Tao…” I tried once again but to no avail; the kid had already gotten back to his room and closed the door with a slam. I sighed in response, acknowledging that I would have to deal with him later.
 
“What happened?” Luhan-hyung asked after a few minutes. As one of the oldest, he had most probably felt the responsibility to break the silence and I could see that Xiumin-hyung also felt the same way.
 
I placed my hand over my face and massaged my temples, collecting my thoughts, before I managed to choke some words out.
 
“This,” I said as I grabbed the paper on the floor and handed it to my baby-faced hyung, biting my lips as to not let my emotions overwhelm me.
 
He grabbed it carefully with both hands and when he widened his eyes, I knew that he understood the meaning of the words written there and also the reaction of our dear maknae. His eyes then became watery and Sehun didn’t fail to notice this.
 
“Lulu-hyung, are you okay?”
 
Upon hearing that, the older broke into tears and fell down to the floor while the only thing that Sehun could do was comfort him even though he didn’t know what was going on.
 
“Hyung, what’s wrong?” he tried asking quietly. I could tell that the maknae wasn’t actually expecting an answer, but Luhan-hyung gave him one anyways.
 
“It’s her words… The lyrics she-” that was all the elder could say before his sobs took control of his ability to speak.
 
Kai was the first on to notice the meaning of his words. He quickly snatched the paper from Luhan-hyung’s hands after the older one broke down and eyed it carefully, clenching his teeth as he read through it and threw the paper down to the floor once he was done with it. Then he grabbed his jacket and plugged in his earphones as he headed towards the door without saying a word.
 
“Where are you going, Jongin?! You can’t go outside!” Suho ordered as Kai opened the front door. Suho was mad; he never used our real names unless it was something serious.
 
“Out,” he screamed back in a nonchalant manner and slammed the door closed. I’m pretty sure that Kai had his music on so loud that he couldn’t hear Suho, so he must’ve just guessed what he was saying ‘cause his response actually managed to make sense for once.
 
Suho sighed at the main dance’s incontrollable actions as he grabbed the paper, finally catching a glimpse at it. Then he mouthed an ‘oh’ and quietly sat back down on the couch as he handed the paper over to the joyful twins, who were staring intently over his shoulder, also not understanding the situation. Baekhyun and Chanyeol both turned away when they read the contents, though, uncharacteristically frowning and looking down to the floor. Baekhyun then started to rub circles in Chanyeol’s back as he lead the taller into their shared room.
 
The others were slowly starting to catch on to the situation once the breakfast duo’s hyper-activeness was turned off. Lay stood up and walked to his room, closing the door slowly as it loudly creaked. D.O. bit his lips and slowly started to clean up the things from the table, trying to take his toughs away from the inevitable but evidently not being able to do so; so he just ended up closing himself up in his room, since his roommate wasn’t going to be coming back in a while. Xiumin-hyung, also headed out, saying that he was just going to the rooftop to get some fresh air; while Chen grabbed some Mandarin books and followed him out saying he was going to study in the lobby downstairs.
 
In less than five minutes, most of EXO had cleared out of the living room, leaving only Suho, Luhan-hyung, Sehun, and me listening to the eldest’s sniffles and sobs grow louder by the second. After a couple of more minutes, I stood up and filled two glasses of cold water, one for me and one for my Hyung. I drank mine in one large gulp but it didn’t seem to cool me off like it usually did. However, it had a calming effect on Luhan-hyung, at least enough to be able to lay down on one of the couches over Sehun’s lap and fall asleep once again while still crying softly.
 
With that problem out of the way, I grabbed my cellphone, my keys, and the worn-out paper that had caused all the commotion, and barged out the door; Suho didn’t even bother to try to stop me. I ended up at the usual Starbucks some blocks down and once I placed my order and found a place to sit, I began to memorize the lyrics even though I already knew this song by heart.
 
All the while my emotions kept telling me to quit, and I had to remind myself various times that I was going to have to perform this song in the SM Town with BoA-sunbae and Key-sunbae anyways, so I better get used to it.
 
So as I began reading it for the second time, I felt my hands’ trembling increase, warning me not to continue…
 
The more I drop my head, the further away the light gets
Lift up your head, open up all possibilities (yeah)
They keep ridicule me, saying that I can't
And devaluing me but I will never stop (hey)

I want to hold it - the hand extended to me (hey)
I will hold it - the hand extended to me (hey)
I bite down all the criticisms toward me
It become silence
 
… because with every verse, endless memories came back to me; detailed memories and flashbacks of the girl who had single handedly brought EXO together…

To me, there is only One voice (One voice)
One dream (One dream), One chance (One chance)
I can do it – One wish (One wish)
One soul (One soul), One time (One time, Hey)
With all my heart (Let's go Let's go)

They look at me with expectant eyes
The light that shines on me is bright
My desperate dreams are now in front of my eyes
Sing a song with One voice (One voice)
One voice (One voice) One voice (One voice) One voice, 
To me, there is only One voice

…the girl that had made such a huge impact on all of our careers, always pushing us forward when we wanted to give up, even at her own expense; the girl that meant so much to all of us and that had written this song hoping to reach all of our hearts with it…

Because there were days that seemed like they would never come
I avoid the world that once turned away from me
I wanted to run away when they were disappointed
Sadness was too deep but I'll stand up again
Don't tell me that I can't
Don't treat me as if you've met a defeated person

There are many failures but only one success
That is right now (Hey) Look at me now

…this was the song that she had written all of our own hopes, dreams, emotions, and experiences; it was the song that she was supposed to debut with…

To me, there is only One voice (One voice)
One dream (One dream), One chance (One chance)
I can do it - One wish (One wish)
One soul (One soul), One time (One time, Hey)
With all my heart (Let's go Let's go)

They look at me with expectant eyes
The light that shines on me is bright
My desperate dreams are now in front of my eyes
Sing a song with One voice (One voice)
One voice (One voice) One voice (One voice) One voice, 
To me, there is only One voice
 
…and now, it was the song I was going to help BoA-sunbae sing in the SM Town along with Key-sunbae.
 
I wonder what she would think about this now…
 
…that girl…
 
…Exi…
 

 

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KISSmeBecca #1
Chapter 3: the first chapter has me a little worried. what does it mean by when she would have debuted??? D:
foreverachild #2
Chapter 7: xhvbsdhjcjhbfsd awwwwwww tao :3 i just wanna put you in my pocket and take you home :3
foreverachild #3
Chapter 5: n'awwww kai you adorable little boy :3
StaceyHoneybuns
#4
Chapter 1: Wow~ That was amazing ~~ Please update some more. It's so powerful........~ <3 Epic story :D
Aishmin
#5
This seems like it'll be pretty interesting, so I'll be looking forwardto your next update. ^^