Chapter Twenty - Suicide.

Mischief and Love

 

Wow.
 
"Mother of god.." Jonghyun gasps from besides me, dramatically removing his shades; his lips formed into a very surprised 'o.' His hair was lightly blowing in the wind, and even though he looked like a supermodel and I would love to compliment him at this moment-- my eyes were fixated back onto the water.
 
Below us.
 
"Is this really such a good idea.. after all?" I manage to choke out, finally realizing how scared less I was after all. The tough act I had been dying to keep up dropped down, and here was the orginal scardey cat Lee Taemin. 
 
My heart was practically now slamming against my rib cage, quite painfully, add to that. It was like, this was the end-- of my life and everything. A goodbye. It's as if I was going to suicide, right here at this very moment.
 
Of course, this was my plain overreacting considering many people have jumped off this cliff-- ouch -- only to land into a lovely mush of cold, blue and very clear water below.
 
Yes. We, my friends were going to do cliff diving.
 
And who's idea was it?
 
"Jonghyun hyung, we shouldn't really.." I begin to say as I turn around to him. I would've expected something more wary-- or even shocked or dramatic, but not the dazed, dreamy look on his face. No, not that at all. I perk an eyebrow. "Jonghyun hyung?"
 
"Taemin!" He breathes, lightly throwing his hands up in the air and inhaling in an exaggerated way. "You smell that, Taemin?" He does it again.. and again, and again.
 
With an awkward look, I try to block out his dreamy tone and take a sniff of the air, just as a whirl of wind brushes past me. My hair flows lightly, and I wanted to close my eyes; just to get a nice feel.. but for a very foolish, paranoid reason-- that somebody might push me off the cliff if I did, (that would never happen anyway) I kept my eyes open and inhaled.
 
The smell-- I couldn't describe it. It was beach-like, but with other light scents added in and mixed together. Basically, it smelled amazing. I bet half was from the light, yellow sand our feet were on. Or maybe the cool, calm waves rustling below us. I just didn't know. Either way, it was a smell i've never sniffed before and I had a sudden urge to capture the scent into a jar and lock it up forever.
 
"It smells great." Onew takes the words right out of my mouth, his eyes squeezed shut as the light wind brushes against him. He looks calm and peaceful-- whereas I was shaking and felt like I was going to break down any minute.
 
You would've thought that the smell would've made it easier for me, to face the fact that I, Lee Taemin, was going to jump off a bloody cliff and plunge right into the water-- where, there could be gross sea creatures and all that .
 
Well, it didn't. 
 
"Remember now," The humorous voice of the woman who had decided to accompany us diverts our attention from the water, to her. "Everything's going to be okay." I bet she was amused by our totally different reactions.
 
I, was scared.
 
Jonghyun was excited.
 
Onew was calm and composed.
 
Key was practically dying.
 
Minho was a rock.
 
I wasn't exaggerating on Minho being a rock. Ever since he joined us back at the hotel room, his face was as blank as a wall. He didn't utter a word to me. He minded his own business and kept his thoughts to himself. And I didn't like that. Even now, when we're up high in the air, he's still solid. I want to crack whatever shell he's trying to hide in, to know what's been bothering him for the whole day. 
 
But deciding to push the bitter fact that he's keeping something away from me-- I look back at the pretty woman. "Excuse me?"
 
"Yes?" She perks an eyebrow up, a smug look on her face.
 
"Can I catch your name.. Mrs..?"
 
"CL is just fine." She winks at me, before gazing back at the water below. She looks back at my petrified face and a smirk creeps onto her lips. "Judging from your reactions, this is your first time doing such a thing?"
 
We all nod stiffly.
 
"Well, it's actually pretty damn easy to do this." She said it with such a smug, casual tone that I had to believe she was some sort of dare devil or something. She even looked bad . And that.. was embarrassing, considering the fact that a chick can look cooler than five guys put together. She continues, with the same tone. "The only hard part is to jump. That's pretty much it. Jumping is the only thing you need to do, but it's also the scariest thing to do. It's like.. imagine this cliff, right here.. with.. dark waters and rocks and cracks and everything."
 
I shudder.
 
"Now that's, scary. But this," She gestures to the water we were about to die in. "It's the opposite. We have people down there. You jump, you feel the air and plunge into the water." She had the same, dreamy look on her face as Jonghyun. 
 
"After that?" Key croaks, in an agitated tone.
 
"You have a life jacket, so simply swim to the raft at the water." She points down, at a small bright yellow raft below. From our distance, I could only point out two heads on the raft. One with short hair and the other with long, blowing casually in the wind. "My friends will be down there. You get onto the raft and wait for your other friends to finish jumping."
 
"Then?"
 
"Then, if you want, you can take another jump." She shrugs lightly, before taking a step back. Pshh. As if i'd do that. "Now, we've wasted enough time boys. Time to jump."
 
I freeze. I thought I was going to be ready and prepared. But now that the actual moment was coming, I couldn't process anything but gibberish in my mind now.
 
"I'll jump first, you know, so you aren't scared or whatever." The same, casual tone. I couldn't understand how she managed to be so calm about this. How she could be in a normal state, knowing her entire body would fly off a cliff, and then fall and fall-- down into freezing cold water at the bottom. How.. how could she do that?! She looks back at us, a smirk creeping onto her lips again. I had a sudden urge to push her. "Well, adios~ Hope you don't die."
 
With that, she took a few steps back, took a breath and then ran her steps again. I held my breath. It felt like my heart stopped right then and there as her feet pushed off the surface of the sand. Her light blonde hair blew in the wind as she narrowed down, shooting her arms in front of her into a diving position. And with that; she vanished.
 
I was too scared to take a step and watch her fall. I was too scared to look at anybody else's reactions. I immediately regretted coming here. I didn't want to do this.
 
"Holy ." Minho gasps.
 
I instantly snap my head towards him. For once, he had spoken. His shell had cracked and there on his face, lay an extremely shocked-- but impressed expression. It felt like I forgot the cliff diving for an almost second. But of course, Jonghyun just had to ruin the moment.
 
"I'll go now!"
 
We all stare at him, dumbfounded. "Seriously?" Onew raises his eyebrows, suprised at Jonghyun's confidence this very fine day. "Are you sure? We could always get CL up and let her jump again, just so it feels more safer--"
 
"No, no." He flashes his palm to Onew, cutting the elder off. His voice was toneless. I guess he was trying to get this over with. I couldn't blame him though. It was times like these I wanted to be a vampire or something. Fast, speedy. I could jump, fall, climb onto the raft and voila, the end. 
 
But I was clumsy, nervous little Taemin instead.
 
"I'll do it."
 
I watch Key's expression and I was surprised to see that in fact, a worried gaze took over his features. He didn't say anything, but stared nervously at Jonghyun.
 
Just like CL, Jonghyun took some steps back. Again, I held my breath.
 
Before Jonghyun could even run through his retreated steps, Key spoke in a wary, but gentle tone. "Be careful."
 
Jonghyun doesn't look. He doesn't even say anything back. But he runs, runs his steps and then gracefully jumps. I could feel my heart getting louder as he vanished.
 
But I couldn't help but miss the beam on his face. It was obvious what the source of his sudden happiness was, anyway.
 
Through the light airy blow of the wind, I could listen to the deep splashing noise of Jonghyun plunging down into the water. I took a cautious step foward, and hear Key's breath hitch as I look down nervously, but curiously.
 
There he was, waving crazily up at me. He looked happy. Phew. I watch as he swims towards the raft and climbs inside. His hair was obviously soaked, and once he was inside the raft with the two women, he waves up at me again, making a small smile tug at my lips. "He made it!" 
 
"Oh thank heavens.." I could hear Key whisper with relief besides me. I look at him, an amused expression adorning my face as he clutches his heart. Even throughout the endless fights and little quarrels the two have, you couldn't deny that love still remained between them. Everything would be alright if Jonghyun wasn't some gullible idiot.
 
"Can I go now?"
 
I blink at Onew. "Um.. okay?"
 
He smiles his adorable, sheepish smile at me, before taking the same spot Jonghyun was in. He takes a calm, deep breath and closes his eyes. 
 
"Onew, don't trip at the edge or something." Minho jokes, but with a serious expression.
 
Onew's eyes open and he laughs lightly, as if this was some normal other day. With another deep breath, he gets ready to run when..
 
"Oh Onew, don't you dare fall--"
 
He cuts Key off with another piercing laugh. I can't understand how he's so.. free. Carefree. 
 
"I'll be fine, guys, i'll be fine." He looks at me, before smiling widely, and then, back foward. I hold my breath for the third time as he begins to run, his hair blowing dramatically in the wind. And just like that, his feet push off the sand and he jumps-- high up in the air and away from us.. falling.. falling.. falling.
 
The light noise of him cannon-balling into the water didn't go unnoticed as all three of us, still remaining on the cliff, laughed.
 
After a small silence, we look at eachother. I thought maybe, just maybe Minho would volunteer to jump now-- but to my utter astonishment, Key perks his hand up. "Better if I go."
 
"What," I gasp, shocked by his bluntness. But I could still see his frightened expression; shining brightly as he takes the same spot. "Why? Minho or I could go; umma, you can go last, it's fine--"
 
"No, it's better if I jump third. So that way, when you jump, I can see you and i'll know you're safe." He explains.
 
"You don't have to do that--"
 
"No, it's fine, it's fine." He chuckles nervously, trying to smile. The smile comes out strained and forced, and before I could even bloody object, he's running.
 
What the .
 
He's not even taking a deep breath, or closing his eyes or getting ready or any like that. He's simply running, as if this was some marathon. My heart thumps loudly against my chest as I watch with shocked eyes. He jumps off, going into the diving position CL previously did and once again, to my utter astonishment, he screams,
 
"YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE!" As he falls down. I could hear his voice going lower and lower.. and with that, the noise of him plunging deep down into the water drifted in the air and I didn't realize I was holding my breath. Again. 
 
"When did he become such a dare devil.." Minho holds the same expression as me, but right after he says the sentence, he bursts out into laughter. And I couldn't help but laugh along with him, because that, was surely the most shocking, but amazingly wonderful moment of Key ever. Truly. 
 
I take a peek down, still laughing as I watch Key doggy-paddle to the raft. It makes it even more humorous, and I double up in laughter and clutch my stomach as Minho joins in with me. "I can't stop.. l-laughing.." The fit of giggles kept escaping my lips, one after another.
 
"Oh my god.." Minho wipes his eyes full of unshed tears of laughter. We both calm down after a moment or two, and then simply smile at eachother. At least he wasn't a rock anymore, or I would surely kick him off this cliff. 
 
"Are you going to jump now?" I ask him, my smile not faltering as I raise my eyebrow.
 
He shrugs lightly, before stepping besides me. "I was actually thinking we could jump together, you know?"
 
I raise my eyebrows. It would be cool though, and plus, less scarier. Not wanting to miss another opportunity like this, I nod eagerly and smile. "Let's do this then!"
 
He holds out his hand, a tiny smile tugging at his lips. With a small blush spilling onto my cheeks, I grab his hand and take a deep, deep breath. It was strange because I wasn't as nervous as before, even though it was my turn. It must be the caring, brilliant presence of Choi Minho besides me. Yes, of course it was.
 
"1.."
 
I close my eyes.
 
"2.."
 
I open them.
 
"3.."
 
I take a deep breath.
 
"Go!"
 
We were running. Well, it felt like he was running and dragging me across. I felt frozen, but I didn't want to mess this joyful moment by killing us both, so I began to pick up the speed with him. As we ran, I could feel the wind hit our faces; our hair blowing wildly around. My heart rate began to pick up as we neared the edge of the cliff, and Minho squeezes my hand. 
 
With the signal, I take my last and final breath and jump, with him.
 
The first thing I noticed was that when I jumped, was the light color of the blue skies. I knew it was crazy to think of such a thing when I was pretty much well, kinda suiciding, but I couldn't help it. It felt like heaven, as we fell. I wasn't scared. 
 
It was more of freedom than the sheer hell I thought it would be. The wind blew past our faces and my hair was blowing crazily in the wind.  I saw the water coming nearer and nearer, and I wanted to, just to simply take a peek at Minho's face-- but we both immediately plunged into the water.
 
I managed to squeeze my eyes shut in the last second, instead of being my constantly foolish self. It felt like the water was engulfing me-- embracing me. It felt cold, but the temperature didn't even bother me. All I knew was that I.. 
 
I wanted to do it again.
 
My head finally bobs up, and I take a breath as I finally look at Minho. I thought maybe if I was a female right now, my ovaries would explode. Because damn, with his hair soaked so ily like that, and the most charming smile ever on his lips-- you would've expected him to be some sort of super model.
 
"That.. was fun!" It felt so surreal. I literally jumped off a cliff. And.. and I can't believe it! And just for that, I begin to laugh. 
 
I realize i'm still holding Minho's hand and I turn around again, just to beam at him. He smiles back, brightly, and even though, we were here, with several other people; it just felt like Minho and I were the only ones in the world.
 
Sort of.
 
"Enough of the lovey dovey moment, now come here!"
 
I would've glared at Jonghyun, but I was way too happy. It was like I was puking rainbows and unicorns. My heart was bursting with fireworks of joy. I just.. it might've been the fact that I did cliff diving for the first time.
 
Or maybe it was the fact that I did it with Minho, holding his hand the whole way through.
 
Maybe.. it was the second fact. Indeed.
 
We swim back to the raft, and Minho lets go of my hand with one last squeeze. I try not to let that get to me, as I climb inside and sit besides Key. He instantly wraps his arms around me and brings me close, sighing in relief. "Oh my god. I thought, I thought of the endless possibilities where you could've just died--"
 
"I'm not dead though."
 
"Like what if you accidentally tripped at the end--"
 
"I didn't trip."
 
"What if you forgot to jump--"
 
"I didn't forget to jump."
 
"WHAT IF YOU LEFT ME FOREVER?!"
 
I grin. "Then i'll be free from your mother-like wraths!"
 
"Taemin!" He scolds me, lightly smacking the back of my head. "You don't know how scared I was, when you jumped. But it made it so much better you decided to jump with Minho. That's a wise decision, young one."
 
"Well what about you then?" I joke, as the two ladies on the raft begin to paddle back to the nearby dock-thing. "You weren't even prepared to jump! You just went crazy!"
 
Key flushes a light pink color. "Oh let's just ignore that, shall we now.."
 
The girls at the raft smile at us. "I'm Minzy," The black-haired one speaks. "And that's my friend, Bom."
 
We all chirp our greetings as we move. 
 
After a while of jumping, going crazy and simply splashing in the water, it was a fact that I was not scared anymore. I wanted to do it again and again. So it made me realize, life is actually too short. And I want to die.. as a dare devil.
 
Of course, I wouldn't go too extreme, but just do the things that not everyone has the guts to do. One example we use, cliff diving. 
 
"There's swimming with the dolphins!" I cry with excitement, staring deeply into the brochure. There were so many activities to do, easy, scary or plain boring-- but I wanted to start off with something easy first. "Let’s do that! Swimming with the dolphins!"
 
"We already went cliff diving today, Taemin-ah." Onew smiles warmly, patting my back as he dries his hair with the towel. 
 
"Plus, we’ve only been here for what? One day. We can do it tomorrow." Key points out.
 
I pout. "But time is flying so fast! Please, pleasee~”
 
"It’s getting late. The place will shut down."
 
I sigh. "Fine."
 
*~*~*~*~*~*
 
I wasn’t ready to sleep yet, even after having such a full, delicious dinner. I wanted to explore this place a little more. I walk around the front entry, brushing my hands against the pretty, delicate flowers or even the trunks of the large palm trees. It felt too relaxing here. If I could, I would honestly live here.
 
"Taemin?"
 
I almost jump in my skin at the sudden arrival of the voice. "Holy --" I gasp, before clutching my heart as I turn around, warily. But then realizing, it’s simply the face and figure of Kai, I sigh in relief. "Oh my god, Kai, you scared me--"
 
"Sorry, sorry." He chuckles with an amused expression. The misty light from the moon gave me a nice view of his face. 
 
"What are you doing here?" I ask, walking towards him with raised eyebrows.
 
"I should be asking you that." He smiles. A little too.. enthusastically, to my discomfort.
 
"Uh, well," I look around, smiling back somewhat sheepishly. "I wanted to explore this place a bit, y’know?"
 
His face lights up. "Well I could help you! I’ve been here before, and I know every little thing and turn and twist! Come on Taemin!"
 
"Oh no, it’s fine--"
 
"Let’s go!" He pulls my hand. 
 
And entwines, our fingers together
 
I would be lying if I said I enjoyed it. He was being too comfortable for me to handle. And just like that, he pulls me off like an excited puppy.
 
If only it were Minho holding my hand like this.
 
YESS. They went cliff diving! How epic is that?! :D Even though i'm scared of heights, something I want to do before I die is to go cliff diving. I'd probably chicken out anyway, but it seems so amazing.
I loved Key's jump in this. Such a dare devil. XD 
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RainbowCupcake
btw ya'll are so nice. thank you for upvoting this story!

Comments

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2min1212
#1
Chapter 30: I read in one go and I love itttt
MrsLeeTaemin
#2
Chapter 24: MAN EVERYONE IS JUST TING ON TAEMIN.
MrsLeeTaemin
#3
Chapter 20: BRUH. I've always wanted to go cliff diving.
MrsLeeTaemin
#4
Chapter 17: Seeing a gif of baby Minho has cured all of my problems.
MrsLeeTaemin
#5
Chapter 2: This story is such a flashback omg.
InMemoryofJonghyun
#6
Chapter 30: Nice story you got here. I read it all in one go throughout the night. I was going to go to to sleep at 2am damnit! Oh well, at least it had a happy ending.
You did the tension build perfectly btw, though the actual I found to be a bit lacking. I also would have liked more wrap up in the last chapter. It feels unfinished to me, rushed.

But I have to today I love the badass chapter. That moment where Taemin has a cheering team in head to say he's so ing awesome, it's hilarious. I could just see a stadium of people just going wild in his head... It's a really funny mental image.
The jongkey ending was more satisfying to me than the 2min one. Because the 2min one felt very easy. It was literally them saying I love you and getting together. Jongkey had more of a fight, which settled everything. But with the 2min one I would would have liked them to be more desperate. Taemin actually apologizing for the plan and not telling him, etc.

Anyway, great story! Keep up up the good work.
Red_lantern #7
AWESOME STORRYYYYY LUVE IT
kuroainii
#8
Chapter 30: Thank you so much for your story. I don't know how to express my love for this story. Thank you also for making me laugh and cry at the same time lol. I really love the interactions and how they slowly realize their mistakes and love for each other. It was so sweet and lovely!!! ❤❤❤
devilishangel_15
#9
Chapter 30: I read this is in one go. I LOVED it :) I love the struggles they go through and how the come to realize that they love each other. Thank you so much for this wonderful piece. I was squealing the whole time and in some bits i laughed so hard and fangirles so hard and in some bits i got teary, because it was beautiful but painful too. You did a GREAT job on this :)
K-Joon
#10
Chapter 30: Umm I really don't know what to say...first I want to thank you for this beautiful story, I enjoyed it soooo much that you can't even imagine. Second I want to tell you that you have done great job, your fic was so awesome and fantastic. I love this kind of fics and I also ship JongKey so....you just made my day, because I read it all in one day.
My poor heart...It's like I want to beg for a sequel, but I don't think it's nesesery. I mean that this story is complete and have wonderful ending but still I would enjoy it much when the story will be some day continued. I know that there is nothing to write anymore but style of your writing and plot of this fic just simple amazed me. So even if I want you to continue this fic It will be not possible. But it's okay. Because their story freshly began. And we can only imagine like their life would look a like. I think it's great. I'm really amazed. Thank you so much one more time for this pleasure I was having reading this. Great job authornim. Hwaiting <3