Lay sighed.

He stole a glance at Luhan, who was lying on the hotel bed with headphones over his ears. Doing his best to pretend that Lay didn't exist.

Like any decent person, Lay had apologized profusely after the incident, but judging by Luhan's dark looks, he remained unforgiven. And since this was their first fight since becoming friends, he had no idea how to make Luhan un-mad at him. Kris (the bastard) had refused to exercise his super-seiyan-duizhang-powers and had told him to "sort things out" on his own. So here he was, stuck in a room with a pissed-off Luhan for the rest of the night.

He stared glumly at his laptop screen. How was he supposed to put the free wi-fi to use when his gaming partner was giving him the silent treatment? Unlike Tao, he had no interest in scouring the web for fan-taken pictures of the group (or more correctly, himself). Nor did he want to marathon dramas with Xiumin or battle Chen on the DS.

So he settled for reading (eternally-entertaining) fan comments.

Kris-oppa is soooo hawt!!!

Pfftt. They should see him without his ten pounds of make-up.

Baozi is such a cutie <3  I just want to gobble him up! ^-^

Hmmm. He wondered what Xiumin would do if one of them ever tried take a bite out of his face. Make them do housework, probably, or if he was drunk enough, kick them in the nuts. His flying kicks were second only to kungfu panda Tao's.

I wish Luhan was my boyfriend...he's so nice!

Like hell he was. Do nice people use up both bottles of hotel shampoo out of spite? If the fan really knew who Luhan was, she'd think twice about dating him. Lay's hands itched to click the reply button, to tell her the truth and put an end to her delusions. The world, after all, deserved the truth. Besides, he wouldn't really be breaking the rules if he used an alias, would he? All Manager-hyung had said was to keep personal information off the Internet...

Within minutes, his virtual alter ego was born. 

The (Un)importance of Birthdays

| Posted on Apr 20, 2012  | 10:41pm |

As we all know, today is our beloved LH's birthday, an event that should be celebrated with much fanfare and heartfelt wishes. It's no easy feat, surviving to the ripe old age of twenty-two. Am I being sarcastic? Not at all. I mean, just think of all the pain he suffered, growing up as the most popular guy at school. Good genes are honestly such a burden.

Speaking of looks, LH's face hasn't aged a bit for the past ten years. The same, unfortunately, can be said about his personality. Despite all his declarations of masculinity, the truth is, he's a stubborn, petulant child. Take birthdays, for example. He's celebrated the thing to death; three cakes, dozens of presents and even a fancy dinner the night before. So what's the point of getting all huffy when a certain someone forgets to mention it on the day of?

If he ever finds himself a girlfriend, let's hope she has the memory of an elephant. If not, she should consider purchasing a robot that counts down to April 20th. Considering the level of his immaturity, maybe he's better off dating the robot instead.

It's not like the thing needs shampoo anyway. 

Tags: idiots, birthdays

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