Stranger

I Don't Want To Fall In Love With You!

One year. Twelve months. Fifty-two weeks. Three hunit and fiddy five hundred and fifty-five days. Eight thousand, seven hundred and sixty five hours. Five…Fifty….two…no wait. Five  hundred and twenty-five-




 

UGH. THIS WAS STUPID.




 

A whole freaking year that stupid Derpyeol had been gone. A year! Yeah maybe half that year Baekhyun had difficulty letting go – especially because that stupid walking talking tree left in such a way only suitable for a poorly written romance novel.

 

Not that Baekhyun wanted to be in any sort of romance story!

 

And especially not with Chanyeol!

 

After an entire year of not seeing that stupid idiot – Baekhyun was still going crazy about him (in both a good and bad way)

 

The brunette huffed as he rode the lift watching the levels light up as he went up –level 2- not far to go…-level 3- Hell, was this the slowest lift in all of Korea?! He suddenly remembered why he took the stairs.

Ding.

He had arrived - 5 hours later (not really, don’t be so dramatic Baekhyun). He stepped onto the carpet and looked around sheepishly. No sign of any maniacal frizzy haired murderers waiting for him. No Chanyeol either.

 

“Wow, I’m so lonely,” Baekhyun muttered sarcastically as he trudged down the corridor towards his apartment.

 

“You can talk to me,” a voice piped up. Baekhyun swung around only to find-

 

omgwhatisthat

 

“NoI’mgoodthankyou,” Baekhyun rushed as he not so subtly ran from the creepy old man in the silk robe. Was that a robe? That was more like a shirt. Omg he couldn’t get it out of his head.

 

He fumbled with the doorknob and fell into the entry. The lights were off. Was Chanyeol hiding? Baekhyun flicked the switch and the light buzzed and lit up the space. The brunette slapped his hands to his face and let out a muffled scream as he slid onto the couch. He scrunched his nose up like a dog who was given a tomato as a birthday treat and closed his eyes.

 

Hurry up, Park Chanyeol.

 

 



---







 

Chanyeol blinked.

 

He blinked for approximately 3.14 and a half seconds until he realised that wait, this ain’t mah house.That was a streetlight - a broken one in fact - and that, allllllll the way over there, was the garbage bin that the idiot-named-Baekhyun, with his mind, had miraculously moved into the path of his own two feet. Chanyeol shuffled on the spot like the awkward goodbye of two people leaving in the same direction.

 

How the hell did he end up outisde?!

 

Oh yeah, that’s right.

 

He cursed his feet, which obviously had a mind of their own because somehow, just somehow, instead of following the shorter one up to the room, they’d managed to march right past the staircase and out the door. Now Chanyeol, strangely shivering and sweating at the same time was glued to the spot - surprisingly in the middle of the street - panicking.

 

 

Panicking because, my god he’d finally gotten somewhere (maybe) with Baekhyun.

 

Panicking because he’d somehow even managed to that up.

 

Panicking because the way in which he’d somehow even managed to that up was by disappearing.

 

And mostly, panicking because even after a year of trying to get him off his mind, that little munchkin with perfect flower boy hair and an oddly cute rectangular smile had somehow infiltrated every single crevice of his mind, setting of all the alarms and security devices.

 

And now...now at the current moment of temporary insanity, he’d rushed off during his friends’ movie night and bussed it with the weirdos (one which was old ahjumma with a brown tooth who wouldn’t stop staring at him and patting her belly) to Baekhyun’s apartment.

 

He didn’t really know what he had expected.

 

Maybe for Baekhyun to fall into his arms (which he kinda did, but not in the romantic way he’d (expected) maybe thought might have happened.

 

But he definitely had not expected the idiot to go and fall over an invisible bin. Did he have eyes in the back of his head? Cause they were missing from the front! Then again, really, nothing had changed. Baekhyun was still as clumsy, pathetic and darn attractive as before.

 

Well, duh. It's only been a year.

A lot can happen in a year.

Yeah, like you finally growing a pair of balls.

Or you finally disappearing.

No brain? Then you'd be Baekhyun.


 

Baekhyun.



 

Baekhyun...




 

In that year, the 52 weeks of loneliness and misery piling on him like dirty laundry, Baekhyun could have become…



 

Fat.



 

Chanyeol snorted unattractively at the hilarious image of double-chin-Baekhyun. He had been surprised though, considering the ridiculous amount of ice-cream the smaller boy inhaled when watching sad things.


 

...The Notebook


 

...Bolt


 

...


 

...his reflection.


 

Chanyeol's heart cried for Kyungsoo's cooking, as he now had to deal with the Black Hole known as Kai, and the heartbroken ahjumma known as Baekhyun.

 

 

 

Speakoftheblackhole.

 

 

 

Chanyeol’s pathetic grin crept onto his face, half guilty, half expecting a-

 

“Ow!” Chanyeol cried out as something very very heavy and very very hard came into contact with his very very empty head. Kai swung the large cookbook back under his arm and Chanyeol stared incredulously. “What the hell Kai?!” He searched around for the cub’s caretaker, whom was nowhere to be seen, while also nursing the slowly swelling lump forming on the top of his head, “What if that killed me?!”

 

Good.

 

Nobody asked you.

 

Just saying what everyone else is thinking.

 

Not Kai though, he's too nice-

 

 

 

“Good.”


 

 

 

Or not.

 

 

 

That was all the bratty dongsaeng had to say, which meant something to Chanyeol because the only times Kai ever said a ‘single’ word was when:

 

  1. He was hungry → “Food.”

  2. He was annoyed → “Whatever.”

  3. He was → “Hyung…”

 

Chanyeol would have liked to have pretended he’d never heard that last one, but that was a lie. Although pretending and lying were two things that Park Chanyeol did best.

 

He narrowed his eyes.

 

But not anymore.

 

That Park Chanyeol had been erased from existence. But now he was back, a more caring, less jerky and only slightly improved version, but still an improved version nonetheless!

 

Chanyeol 2.0 and a bit!

 

The new Chan-bot that little Baekhyun had been wanting for his birthday, Christmas and Hannukah!

 

The son that his mother could finally approve of…

 

 

 

He was-
 

 

 

 

He looked up.

 

 

 

 


 

“ you Kai! I was going to blast you with my determination!” Chanyeol screamed into empty space. His hair flopped around like his childhood pet goldfish Gary (who had mysteriously disappeared for a day and returned an orange painted rock) as he spun 360-degrees looking for any sign of the person who had just assaulted him with a low-fat cookbook. He might have heard a faint superkai~! in the distance but he chose to ignore it. To be honest, Kai could have been standing right in front of him for all he’d known, not that Chanyeol could see. He cursed with a raised fist at the broken street lamp, very much like an old man chasing a kid of his lawn.

 

Except he was young.

 

And hot.

 

Really...hot…

 

Chanyeol wiped sweat from his brow. What was he doing again?

 

He paused.

 

 

Oh .

Baekhyun.

 

 

 

Somewhere on the fourth floor, Baekhyun was snoring soundly after several attempts of keeping himself awake and reassuring himself that Chanyeol had not forgotten about him.

 

 

 

 

“I forgot about him!!!”

 

 

 

 

 

Chanyeol’s eyes widened and he screamed at two random people walking by. He couldn’t have picked a worse thought to express verbally, and also to two worse random people. “Oh my god, that was-”

 

“OW!” Chanyeol yelled as Kyungsoo hit him on the head with a…frying pan?  “Why do you even have tha-”

 

THWACK.

 

“Argh- why are you hitting m-”

 

 

CLONK.

 

 

“-okay I know why you’re hitting me bu-”


 

TANG.

 

 

“-okay maybe I deserved tha-”

 

 

CLUNK.



 

“-okay I do!” Chanyeol put his hands up in the air, “I do deserve it!” He braced for another impact, though he wished it would come quickly. The throbbing in his head was making its own personal dubstep bassline. It didn’t come, and Chanyeol cautiously opened one eye. Kyungsoo peered down at him, his eyes the size of…watermelons. He didn’t think he’d seen his eyes so big since the time he’d accidentally poured grape juice straight onto the new but super ugly as was all of Kyungsoo’s purchases rug. Wait, maybe that time he’d caught him and Kai in the bathroom. That was a different type of wide-eye though. This was Kyungsoo’s notorious cook-for-youself-for-the-rest-of-your-life wide-eye. Whilst he’d been in thought about how if Kyungsoo had laser vision the world would not be safe, the frying-pan had been set down. Chanyeol felt like a lion being beaten up by an angry beaver.

 

“Say it again,” Kyungsoo stared at him, “so I can hit you again.” Chanyeol choked on his words and sent an invisible SOS to Kai before realising the traitor had taken the first hit.

 

 

Kyungsoo was bugged by the silence. He’d been waiting an entire year unleash this fury upon the man that had inadvertently caused the suffering of himself and an the entire nation.

He couldn’t exactly beat up Baekhyun…

 

 

 

Chanyeol still feared for his head, not so subtly putting a few good metres between himself and his near future murderers. Trying to explain, he spluttered and pointed towards the apartment.

 

“Baekhyun’s up there,” he said quickly with wide eyes darting continuously back and forth between Kyungsoo and his grip on the fryingpan. The bug-eyed boy seemed to relax for a split second before he snapped again.

 

“Then why are you out here?!”

 

Kai narrowed his eyes.

 

“Where you running away again?”

 

Of for fox sake. This was getting worse.

 

 

“It’s not what it looks like,” Chanyeol paused, “well I did walk in the opposite direction and leave him up there.”

 

 

Kyungsoo’s grip tightened.

 

“But i’m not running away!”


 

 

 

“Who’s running away?”

 

 

 

A familiar, yet entirely unwanted voice popped up next to Chanyeol as a car rolled up.

 

 

 


 

Chanyeol whipped back around and screamed into the sky.

 

 

 

WHY! WHY ARE YOU ALL HERE?!”

He yelled at his idiot friends piling out of the car. He sprinted towards them, and wrestled to close the door on Luhan in the back seat. The blonde growled at him like an angry Chihuahua and Chanyeol grunted like a boar in mating season. Sehun quietly ignored his boyfriend’s pleas for help and simply got out the other side.


“Go home! All of you!” Chanyeol gestured wildly in the air at the onlookers who watched him with confusion.  Needless to say, his brain was running so fast, it hit a pebble, somersaulted several times and fell off a cliff and drowned. Why the hell did it seem the entire nation was here to witness his humiliation and the of his breakdown.

 

Luhan was the first to break yet another awkward silence.

 

“We know why you’re here,” he muttered.

 

Chanyeol sighed a sharp breath out of his nostrils.

 

“Yeah, me too. And he’s probably given up waiting cause of all thiiiiiissss,” he replied sarcastically, motioning to the group with an angry finger.

 

“Yeah and Tao’s waiting for me in bed but here I am,” Kris waved his fingers in the air. Everybody just stared. His hands shot up, “what? He’s probably and I’m missing ou-”

 

“Okay nobody cares about your Necrophiliac urges-”

 

“He’s not dead!”

 

“I walked into your room once and he was there and I thought you’d accidentally murdered someone and i’d have be your alibi,” Luhan snapped.

 

 

 

Oh my god it was like an episode of Real-Househusbands-of-Let’s-Not-Let-Chanyeol-Leave.

 

 

 

“Chanyeol!” Luhan slapped him which resulted in a pathetic yelp from he-who-was-just-named, “What are you going to do?”

 

 

Chanyeol stared blankly.

 

 

What was he going to do?

 

 

 

A few scenarios seemed alright…

 

Chanyeol knocks gently on the door to the apartment. He is greeted by a sweet smiling little Baekhyun. I have returned, Chanyeol says. And forever you’ll stay, Baekhyun replies. They kiss and have …

 

Omg what the actual was that.

 

Chanyeol bursts into apartment. He finds Baekhyun crying as usual on the lounge chair with an entire bucket of ice-cream also usual. He approaches him from behind and Baekhyun screams like a girl has a heart attack.

 

...

 

Chanyeol opens the door the apartment and is approached by a very angry Baekhyun yelling blah blah blah what took you so long blah blah you’re so fat blah blah there’s no ice-cream in the fridge.
 

Yeah. That’s probably it.

Maybe I won’t go in.    



Luhan’s eyes focused on Chanyeol’s face. Somehow he spotted the microsecond of doubt.

 

“You’re bailing, aren’t you.”

 

The tension in the air was enough to suffocate him, like the time he was dreamt he was snorkelling and couldn’t breathe but woke up to find he was eating his pillow. Everybody’s eyes were on him.

 

“I’m not!” He threw his hands violently into the air, “Why does everyone keep sayi-”

 

“Because you’re an idiot.”

 

Thanks Lu.

 

“Luhan is right-”


“-i’m always right-”

 

“-he’s not alright right, but this time he is,” Kyungsoo sighed. “You need to sort this out. No running away.” On the away he picked up the frying pan again, and Chanyeol gulped. Kai walked towards him and punched him in the chest. The taller boy fell slightly backwards in shock.

 

“Chanyeol you need to grow some balls.”

Says the boy whose brains are in his balls.


Suddenly the group was on him, all shouting and yellin and looking like they wanted to kill him.

 

Kyungsoo pushed to the front. “You have to fix this Chanyeol!”

 

“Uh, yes? Well I-”

 

“I don’t care if you have to drink poison to prove it to him! Kiss him, tell him you’re an idiot! Which you are!” Kyungsoo walked towards him angrily.

Chanyeol quickly backed away.

“Whoa, calm down. Why are you so-”

 

Kai stepped in, “If I have to leave Kyungsoo, and marry Baekhyun to make him happy, I would.”

 

“I don’t think that would make him ha-”

 

Kris walked right up to Chanyeol’s face.

“Give him really good .”

 

Uh.

 

“Buy him roses every day.”
 

“Tell him you love him all the time.”


“Marry him.”


“Kiss him.”


“Do it Chanyeol.”
 

“Fix it Chanyeol.”
 

“Chanyeol you have to make it righ-”
 

 

ARRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 

 


Chanyeol finally snapped.

 

 

“Why,” He puffed furiously, “Why do you all even care what I do?!”

 

 

There was a moment of silence. A moment that was broken quickly by the sound of a dying whale emanating from Kyungsoo’s tummy. It begun.

 

“There’s no ing food in the fridge anymore!” Kai started.

 

“Well that’s not my fault! I make it. Somebody has to get to it faster.”

 

“Faster? Faster than me? I blink and it’s disappeared. Then I see back of Baekhyun’s stupid little head disappearing into his room.”

 

“Well maybe make your own food, and it won’t disappear!”

 

“Thats effort I could spend doing something els-”

 

Everyone simultaneously switched off from that channel.

 

Chanyeol glanced at Kris.

 

The tall idiot had a dumb expression and shrugged.

 

“I don’t really care about you guys. I only came cause I though Kyungsoo would have baked some cookies.” There was a sob from someone somewhere, most likely at the memory of such luxuries.

 

Suddenly, somebody began pushing everyone out of the way. Kris suddenly fell forward, and Sehun oomf-ed to the side and everybody stared speechless as a blonde mop of hair strutted towards Chanyeol.

 

Luhan grabbed the taller by the collar and pulled him down with a snap. Chanyeol thought his head would fall off.

 

What the-

 

“This is all your fault Chanyeol,” he snarled.


“Haven’t...you been messing it up the whole tim-”

 

His sentence was cut off by someone clapping. It was Kyungsoo. There was almost a tear in his eye, but Chanyeol couldn’t tell because GOD DAMMIT SOMEONE FIX THIS LIGHT ALREADY I CAN’T SEE KAI ANYMORE.

 

“Luhan,” Kyungsoo beamed, “I’m so happy you’re finally able to accept their love.”

 

The chinese man made a gagging sound. “Look at my hair,” he growled. He turned to the group, tears welling up in his eyes. Chanyeol peered at it cross-eyed. It was the same ol’ dusty blonde. But messy. Like, very messy. And fluffy. Almost Baekhyun’s windy-not-a-date-valentine’s-day’s bird’s nest hair. It looked like he’d slept on a velcro pillow, and then put on a makeshift wig made out of baby chickens. It was just a mess, which was quite unusual for Luhan because he used so much-

 

“Hair product,” he snarled. “He comes over, and tries to be best buddies with me and he uses all of it.”

 

Kyungsoo sighed, “...that heroicness just went down the drain.”


Chanyeol clapped his hands to his face.
 

Baekhyun could have been murdered AND buried by now.
All because these idiots wanted to stand around and talk about their food. Their hair. Their cookies.

 

WHATEVER!

 

“Get out of my way!” Chanyeol pushed Luhan out of his path. “I’m so sick of everyone saying do this do that don’t do this blah blah....” He began stomping towards to door, “...go out with him don’t go out with him…” The group watched on in silence. “...you’re a jerk he’s too nice you’re too ugly…”

 

Chanyeol had been a flour sack of mixed emotions. It didn’t help when everything had turned out the way it did. Because of who he was, and what he’d done, and not wanting to repeat that. Chanyeol had thought he could make it right by disappearing. He thought that if he was cold or jerkish, it would help. YEAH A BIG LOT OF HELP THAT DID. He turned around to make a face at his friends. Baekhyun would get his love - no more running away. Even if it meant sacrificing everything - his comfort, his pride, his Ben & Jerry’s monthly subscription (that he totally didn’t sign up for after a month of leaving Baekhyun). Even after a year, Chanyeol realised he couldn’t’ be without the stupid little idiot. He felt his heart struggle to stay in his chest as he pinned in the passcode.

 

BEEP BEEP.

 

A car honked and Chanyeol spun around. He noticed his friends were fixated on a sleek black vehicle, or more-so the slim handsome man stepping out of it. The driver looked at Chanyeol’s friends briefly, and then fixed his eyes at him, his lips pulled into a devilish smirk.


“Hey stranger.”

 

 

 

 

 

---

Author's Note:

Hey guys. I highly doubt anyone will be reading this. I'm so sorry i left you all alone. I'm a horrible person and i like to procastinate when i'm procrastinating. you know. Right? Haha. Please tell me what you think. I work on your comments. They give me energy.

 

 
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RaisonDetre
Awww I foud somebody who made a picture for "I Don't Want To Fall In Love With You!"

Comments

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glances
#1
Chapter 14: Lol I never knew that I really miss these idiots.
glances
#2
Chapter 5: I read this again. I wonder if you're going to be back to update this. But anyway, take your time. :)
Yarden657
#3
Please update author nim
byunsbunny #4
Chapter 35: lol what the hell ?????
baek_has_chan
#5
Chapter 9: Ajka8cyMxnnfijsna so ING CUUUUUTE AHHHHHHHHHH MY HEART >_<
baek_has_chan
#6
Chapter 3: LOL Baekhyun has such bad luck hahahha
thepeachills #7
Chapter 29: LOVE THE TAORIS MOMENT
JannDG
#8
Chapter 2: Oh my God, Baek.
A_B_Raven #9
OML THIS FANFIC- *breaths*
It's helped me.
I've been feeling so sad this week and omfg i read this and everyday id finish a few chapters. I absolutely ADORE your characterizations! Baekhyun and Channie are just- *cacklin* HILARIOUS AF!!! Their thoughts made me laugh so hard, and made me so happy. The ust and in-denial-ness of the two make me frustrated yet amused, and im glad i stumbled upon this cute sorta crack-y, fic! I love it so much, and I don't want to pressure you, that's not my thing, so even if i REALLY WANT YOU TO UPDATE... i'll just say that i hope you wont abandon this hilarious story!
P.S. i rarely read stories i know are still on going, because waiting for new chapters make me impatient and not happy, but for this fanfic? I'd wait as long as i could! :D
heungsoonshipper
#10
Chapter 51: i hope you'll comeback :')