His phone beeped, breaking the silence between us. He glanced at his phone before sighing.
 

“I gotta get to school. Jiyeon’s looking for me,” he said, releasing my hand from his. My heart dropped into my stomach as he stood up. “Will you be okay?”
 

 I was about to lie to him and tell him that I would be alright, but I was so tired of doing this to myself. I was tired of faking smiles and telling everyone that I was okay. I was tired of pretending to be okay. I was a mess inside and Baekhyun was right. I was strong, but everyone had their breaking points and I was having one now.
 

“No,” I said, standing up, tears quickly welling up in my eyes. “I’m not okay, Baekhyun.” He looked at me, eyes full of sympathy. His walls were down again. This was my chance. “I’m standing in the room of the only family member I have left and I have to accept the fact that I can’t afford to just keep her on life support forever. Does it really seem like I’m okay?”
 

“I-“
 

“The man I fell in love with has been brushing me off his shoulder like I’m dirt. Do you know how it feels to feel like dirt, Baekhyun? Am I really nothing to you? Is that all I am? Are you just here because you pity me, Byun Baekhyun? Because that’s really not what I need right now.” The blood running through my veins rose in temperature and relief came upon me after I had finally uncorked the bottle of feelings that were just waiting to be released.
 

“I don’t pity you,” he said sincerely. “And no, you’re not-” He stopped mid sentence when his phone rang. I’m not what? He closed his eyes in chagrin as he answered the call. When his eyes reopened, his walls were right back up again. “Yes, Jiyeon, I’m on my way.” He shoved his phone into his pocket “Listen, I have to go. I’m going to need you to be okay, alright?” he said, giving me a pat on the shoulder and walking out the door.
 

My chest trembled copiously as uneven sobs came out. What did he think he was doing? He was going to tell me that I wasn’t nothing to him, wasn’t he?
 

I somewhat regained my composure and chased after him. I needed to hear it from his mouth.
 

The rain was pouring hard when I made it outside. I spotted Baekhyun with his head down, walking awfully slow for someone walking in the pouring rain without an umbrella. I mustered up some fortitude, jogged up to him, and spun him around by the shoulder.
 

It was raining hard enough that his hair and clothes were already on their way to becoming soaked in a matter of minutes. There was water under his eyes. It wasn’t rain. It couldn’t have been rain. Rain couldn’t puddle in his eyes like that.
 

He was crying.
 

“Baek-”
 

“No, don’t speak,” he said at an alarming volume, voice trembling. I froze in place. “Do you know how hard it is to pretend that you don’t mean anything to me?! Do you? It’s hard, okay? It’s so hard. Why can’t you be like all the other girls? They give up when they realize that I’m not looking for a relationship. But you,” he said taking in a sharp breath. “You just had to go and ruin everything. The only reason you could never get a read on me was because you knew nothing about me. Then you just had to go snoop around and find out things that I’ve never told a soul. Don’t you think there are people out there that don’t want to be read? Secrets are secrets for a reason.” My breath was caught in my throat. His walls were collapsing, brick by brick, right before my very eyes.
 

“There’s a reason I don’t tell anyone anything. There’s a reason I try not to get to close to people. Do you really need to know that reason? Do you really? Do you?!” He was flat out shouting at me as I stayed silent. “Okay, I’ll tell you since you’re so curious. Every girl I’m close to in my life dies. Yes, you heard me correctly. They die. I lost my mom, my sister. I lost the love of my life for God’s sake.
 

“This is why you can’t be close to me. This is why I tried to keep our relationship from moving any farther than it did. But you being you had to go find me and I just had to be drunk and kiss you.” My eyes widened. He remembered that? “It was so selfish of me, but I didn’t care because I was drunk.”
 

I swallowed the huge lump in my throat. “Baekhyun, I’m not going to die just because I’m close to you.”
 

He heaved a sigh and continued. “That’s not it. Do you want to know why I got wasted that night?” he barely whispered, his face inches from my own. “I found out that I was dying. I’m dying. I’m going to die. You can’t be with someone that’s going to die. I won’t let you.”
 

“I know, Baekhyun. I know.” I said, tears flowing down my own face. “I’ve always known.”
 

“W-what?”
 

“I know you have cancer, Baekhyun.”
 

His face was full of shock and confusion. And especially fear. But before he had the chance to speak up, I heard someone running up behind us.
 

It was a nurse with an umbrella over her head. “Miss, you’re grandmother is awake.”
 

My eyes rounded as I turned to Baekhyun and more shock was added to his expression. He nodded his head toward the hospital, signaling that I go in. But I wasn’t going to let him slip through my fingers again; not this time.
 

I extended my hand out to him and I watched as he stared at it. He returned his eyes back to mine as he hesitantly placed his cold, wet hand into my own.
 

We walked into the hospital hand in hand, soaking wet, leaving our wet, squeaky footprints on the linoleum floor.
 

I stopped in my tracks before entering my grandmother’s room. I was terrified. The next words that would come out of my grandmother’s mouth would probably be the last.
 

“You can do it,” Baekhyun said behind me, giving my hand a light squeeze.
 

Feeling a bit reassured, I took a deep breath and stepped forward into the room.
 

There my grandmother was, lying in bed, looking not as pale as she has been. A wide grin came upon her face as soon as she saw me.
 

“You two are finally dating?” I couldn’t believe her. Her first words to me after being in a coma were about my relationship status. These could possibly be her very last words. I couldn’t believe her, but at the same time I couldn’t help but let out a chuckle.
 

“N-”
 

“Yeah, we are dating,” Baekhyun cut in. My eyes widened at him and he sent a small smile my way.
 

“Oh, I’m so happy for you both,” she said when suddenly her heart monitor rapidly started pulsating. My eyes widened as I ran to her and clasped her hand in mine. “I married my high school love you know.”
 

“G-grandma,” was all I managed to say as tears rapidly fell down my face. How could she talk about something so unnecessary when her time on earth was shortening?
 

Doctors rushed in to the room. “You’ll be fine, my dear. As long as you don’t make out with your boyfriend in the rain and get sick,” she said glancing at our soaking attire.
 

I gawked at her. She did it again. “Ma’am you’re going to need to leave the room,” the doctor said as a nurse tried to us out. I couldn’t leave. I needed to stay with her as long as I could.
 

“Grandma, I love you!” I said, holding onto her for dear life.
 

“I love you too,” she weakly said.
 

“Ma’am,” the doctor repeated.
 

“Yes, I know I have to leave, but this is my only family will you please at least let me say goodbye?!”
 

“Get her out.” It was rather annoying how heartless doctors could be. I knew it was a matter of saving her life, but he told me himself she was dying. It was inevitable and I knew it.
 

“Come on, let’s go,” Baekhyun said, pulling me by the waist and away from my grandmother. I tried to fight him off, but of course I was too weak.
 

By the time we were on the other side of the door, I could hear the long, steady beep of the machine. “Goodbye, Grandma,” I whispered as Baekhyun tightly pulled me into his chest.
 

“Let’s go home.”