Myungsoo felt something touch his cheeks. He slowly opened his eyes, only to see Daehyun, staring at him. In the darkness, his eyes glimmered like dark crystals but the warmth in his tiny hands comforted him.

“Hyung,” he whispered. “Are you okay?”

“Why do you ask?”

“You’re crying,” he pointed out.

Myungsoo kept quiet. It was somewhere around autumn when Daehyun stayed over to his older brother’s house once again. The traces of summer were nowhere to be found. Crimson leaves fell freely from the trees, and the sky was often blue. The sunshine during those days felt like molten streams of gold, making everything it touched shimmer like amber.

“I will be okay,” he said. “So go sleep, Daehyun. You have school tomorrow.”

The young boy closed his eyes, but he didn’t remove his hands from Myungsoo’s tear-streaked face, and the older one wouldn’t have it any other way.

The next day, just before the clock three, Myungsoo went to the restaurant. He sat on the same spot, stared at the same poster stuck on the wall ahead of him and ordered the same food. This time, he had an excuse. Daehyun’s classes wouldn’t end until half past four, and his alibi for staying in the restaurant was to wait for his younger brother’s dismissal, and not for Sunggyu. He knew, however, that it was all a complete lie. He still hoped Sunggyu would reconsider on his own accord. Myungsoo was aware: there were easier ways to reach her. He had her phone which he still left untouched, and that might as well serve as the key for him to meet her. Nevertheless, he didn’t want to cheat. He was determined to gain the approval of those who surrounded her first. Then and there, Myungsoo realized he was actually serious about something, and he considered it as a feat, because he always thought he was the type who rarely cared.

While waiting for his order to arrive he stared at the scenery outside. It drastically changed. From the vibrant green trees and the smoldering heat of the sun, the weather became slightly cooler and the sky softer. The leaves fell with every gentle brush of the wind, and he figured autumn was a nice season, but he hated the red leaves swaying around. Red reminded him of blood, staining his hands from years ago and he wished nobody would ask what he thought of the trees during autumn. It was unlikely, but he still wished nobody would use that as a conversation starter.

“What do you think of the trees today, Myungsoo?”

“The branches remind me of my hands and the leaves look like blood to me.”

He heard the soft clinking of the plates, and he looked up, only to see a waitress smiling at him. She had huge eyes and well-defined features. Her long, wavy hair was tied back. Myungsoo’s eyes gazed at the nametag pinned on her pocket. It read ‘Jiyeon’.

“Please enjoy the meal,” she said in an amicable tone of voice, before doing a slight bow. She looked at him again. “And if there’s anything you need please—”

“What do you think of the trees today?” he cut in.

The waitress named Jiyeon seemed taken aback. “Pardon?”

“What do you think of the trees today?” Myungsoo repeated, this time slower.

A moment of silence passed by between them, and finally, she answered, “I think they’re beautiful. Please enjoy the meal.”

She bowed once again, and stalked off.

Myungsoo scoffed, and thought if it were Suzy, they would have had a good conversation about trees during autumn. He was certain she would understand, like the way she always did. He found himself staring at the table she used that summer afternoon. He wondered what would happen if it was him and not Daehyun who spotted the pen. He wondered if things would have been different. It felt weird for Myungsoo, missing a stranger to that extent, but he couldn’t help it. He wanted to experience the connection he had with her once again, and it swiped at his heart, knowing the possibility of that happening was low.

As if on autopilot he took his phone out, only to dial his mom’s number.

“Hello, this is Mrs. Kim. I can’t answer the phone at the moment. Please leave a message after the beep.”

Beep.

“Mom, it’s Myungsoo. I’m in this restaurant at the moment, the one near the record shop—I can see it from here, by the way. I was supposed to meet that girl over there, but I didn’t.

“Daehyun saw her, though. She dropped her pen, you see. I was supposed to meet her, and I looked forward to it so much. But, it didn’t happen.

“You always told me things occur for a reason, and there is a right time for everything. Mom, I have a question for you.

“What if that was the right time, but we sort of missed it? What if that was the case? Would there be another chance for us? Would there?”

Myungsoo felt his chest tighten, and a lump was beginning to form in his throat. So, he hung up.

<:>

“Noona, are you okay?” Sang Moon asked one night. He was hanging around in her room, then, reading his collections of manhwa on the floor. Suzy, on the other hand, was resting on her bed with her feet perched on the headboard. She was reading a novel she had to write an essay on.

“I am,” she muttered. “Why do you ask?”

“You’ve just been quiet these past few weeks,” he pointed out.

Suzy scoffed, and he glanced at Sang Moon, who was already looking at her. “Are you worried?”

“You bet I am!”

“I’m all right,” she told him, with a warm smile playing on her lips.

Silence, and finally the younger one spoke out, “Does it have something to do with hyung?”

She froze for a moment, but decided to brush the feeling away by flipping her paperback over to the next page. He sensed she didn’t want to talk about it, so he settled down and decided to not push it anymore.

“Your birthday’s coming up soon,” Sang Moon pointed out.

“Yeah,” she replied.

“What are your plans, noona?”

“Mom said I can celebrate with my friends first,” Suzy answered. “So we all decided to go to this café Sungjong suggested. We’ll hire a live singer, as well.”

“Café?” Sang Moon repeated, with an impish grin gracing his lips. “Count me out. That’s boring!”

“But you’re not invited in the first place,” Suzy retaliated, which caused her younger brother to stick his tongue out to her.

“But which café is that?”

“Halcyon Days,” Suzy answered. “We’ll go there on the eighth. Say, will you have any presents for your lovely sister?”

“No way,” he shot back. “You bit me back then, remember?”

Suzy pounced on him, and she began to ruffle his hair despite his struggles to break free. “Stop bearing grudges already, Sang Moon!”

<:>

Sunggyu roamed around the boutique, wondering what to buy. He didn’t feel awkward like the first time he entered, considering he got used to it while he was still with Sunye. She loved shopping, and at the end of the day, Sunggyu’s car would be filled with bags of clothes and perfumes. The thing was, Sunye didn’t buy anything for herself. She bought so many things for her relatives, along with Sunggyu’s foster family.

“To remember me by,” she would always say, with a smile on her lips. “I know these things will rot away, too, but at least I tried. I hope my memories will live on, though.”

Soon, however, as her condition worsened, she wasn’t able to shop anymore. She said she never had any regrets, because she spent those days with Sunggyu.

“I’m so sorry for using you,” Sunye whispered to him, three days before her death. She was still in the hospital, then, with her hair all gone. Her eyes were sunken, and her complexion was ashen. Nevertheless, the warmth of her soul still stayed in that withered body of hers. She placed her bony hands on his sturdy ones, and tears began to emerge from his eyes.

That was the first time Sunggyu cried in front of her.

“What can I do for you?” the lilting voice of the saleslady asked, dragging Sunggyu back to reality. He blinked for a few times, and smiled at her. He walked towards the shelves which contained the clips, examined each design and finally settled for a silver, butterfly clamp, studded with pink crystals.

“I’ll take this one.”

“Of course,” the saleslady said. “It’s a very good choice. Is it for your girlfriend?”

He stared at her for a moment longer, and after giving a sheepish grin he said, “I wish.”

<:>

“It’s now October,” Teacher Yang began, while looking at his students with an unflinching stare. He was holding his notebook at that time. “And every year, all of you are required to do some practical outside of the school premises. As you all know, this makes up 50% of your grade for this semester.

“The school has arranged specific places, so you don’t have to worry. However, there’s a spot in here that only needs one singer. Is anyone brave enough to take it?”

Myungsoo, without even thinking about it, shot his right hand up in the air. He’d rather sing alone than work in a band. He was good at cooperating, but he wasn’t in the right condition to do that.

Teacher Yang smirked. “Kim Myungsoo, you will be assigned to sing in Halcyon Days Café on the eighth. It’s a special event, considering you will be singing at a birthday party.”

Soon, the class got divided into groups. Some had to busk, while some were required to perform in other special occasions, as well.

“It must be good, being the prodigy of the class,” Jung Yonghwa remarked. He stood up in front of Myungsoo, with his hands shoved in his jeans’ pockets. “Being able to always stand alone and get the highest grades possible, it must feel so good.”

The other one scoffed, and he proceeded to gather his things sitting on his desk. He shoved it in his bag, and gave Yonghwa an icy stare. “Try doing it, then, so you’d know how it feels like.”

Myungsoo gave his classmate a quick, sardonic smirk, before walking away.

"Pride goes before destruction, a haughty spirit before a fall."
- Proverbs 16:18