Days, weeks and months pass as I keep trying to deal with Yoseobs condition, having him forgetting more and more day by day, week by week. It’s still a hell of a rollercoaster ride with him, as he keeps forgetting and remembering just to forget everything again. There are more downs than ups, but I am still grateful for the ups, whenever there might approach some in our lives.

                As I come home one day, I greet him with my usual ‘Seobie, I’m home!’ and step out of my shoes, taking off my jacket. I look around and notice something being odd. At first I can’t really figure out what it might be but then I notice the walls seem to be empty and I see frames stapled on top of the small cupboard. Most of the pictures and frames with our photos had been taken off or turned around, so one could not see them. I raise a brow, questioning Yoseobs actions and I call out my fiancés name again as I head into our bedroom. “What have you been doing with all the photos?” I murmur as I step into the room and catch Yoseob looking at pictures.

“We look so cute together…”, he says and changes the pictures in his hands, looking at the next one. I chuckle and roll my eyes. “Of course we do…We always do.” I cross my arms, watching him and lean against the doorframe. Although he shouldn’t have taken out all our photos of the frames I think that this is cute of him.

“But where is he..?” I blink at this question, confused and wonder who he might mean. With a step forward I go to sit next to him on the bed and take one or two photos into my hand, which are sprawled all over the sheets of the bed. “Where?”, he murmurs again, quietly. “Why isn’t he home?” It is as if he is completely ignoring my presence and in trance as I sit next to him and tear my gaze off of the photos to look up at him. All his mind and eyes are fixed on is the single photo in his hands. He seems confused, not understanding and totally lost.

                He looks up at me and repeats his question again, asking “Why isn’t Junhyung home?!” He clutches the photo in his hands tighter. It is one of the photos he kept, even though I never liked him keeping the photos with his ex-boyfriends, but photos are memories and doesn’t matter who I am, I would never have the right to forbid him to keep his photos – to keep his memories. Especially in times like these, where he’d forget. My gaze falls at the photo first. The picture shows him, hugging his ex-boyfriend Junhyung tightly, smiling into the camera as the latter kissed his cheek. Then I look back up at Yoseob, not knowing what to say. “Did he leave me?!”, he asks, seeming desperate. “Doesn’t he love me anymore?!” Yoseob is on the verge of tears, I can exactly see the tears pricking at the corners of his eyes and probably filling them up, making him see everything in a blur.

“Junhyung…where is Junhyung…?!” He sobs and his tears are spilling over his cheeks, his nose slightly reddened. “He said he’d always be there for me!” Hesitantly I wrap an arm around him and pull him close. As Yoseob cries over someone who hasn’t been there for him in years, a lightning hits me and I realize that this probably means that he doesn’t know who I am. Yoseob places a hand on my arm and cries into my chest, murmuring things about Junhyung and about loving him and needing him. I notice that his ring is gone and my brows furrow. I swallow and glance at the mess, which is curled up against me, sobbing, whimpering and crying.

He forgot me., keeps whirling and repeating in my head over and over again as I stare at the opposite wall and slowly strike over his hair with my hand in comfort. My body feels numb and I feel dull. Did he forget me completely? Am I a complete stranger to him now? I feel sick to the stomach and it feels like someone punched me right into the guts. I get up, not being able to stay any moment longer with him for now anymore and stagger out of the bedroom, feeling nauseous, knees feeling weak and hands shaking. I make my way into the living room, leaving him in the bedroom and there I finally collapse to my knees. A sob escapes my lips and I immediately press a hand to my mouth. Salty liquid streams down my cheeks as I can’t hold it back anymore. I try to muffle my whimpers and cries, punching against the floor. “How could you already forget me? So soon?....” I murmur in between my sobs. “And saying that you love someone else?!”

I support myself on my hands, staring to the ground as more and more tears fall down to the floor. I feel myself trembling, feeling cold and I try to calm down as my breaths get quicker by the second, feeling as I’d hyperventilate any moment. I turn around to sit down to the floor, leaning back against the wall. I take in deep and long breaths, not being able to think about anything properly, not having thought that this moment would come so soon, thought that I’d have more time with my Seobie. I wrap my arms around my legs as I pull up my knees and bury my face into them. I let it all out in silence. I don’t want anyone to hear, especially not him. I don’t want him to know and why would he worry about a stranger?

                “Kikwang?”

I hear a familiar voice ringing in my ears and look up, seeing Yoseob standing in the doorframe. My hair was tousled and my eyes were stinging and red from all the crying, he didn’t look any different, except that his expression was more than worried. His eyebrows were furrowed, his lips parted and he stood there for a moment before running up to me and falling to his knees next to me. “What is wrong, Kikwang?!”, he asked and placed his hands on my cheeks, wiping my eyes. “Why are you crying? What happened?” I have never seen him so worried in months and I just shake my head without answering, sobbing again and tackling him in a hug. “My Seobie…”, I murmur and hold him close. He wraps his arms around me and caresses my hair. “Please don’t be sad, or I will be too…”, he mumbles cutely and I pull back to look at him, seeing him pout. “Please, don’t leave me again…not yet. I- I can’t deal with that.” I say quietly and kiss his pout. “Please.”

He seems confused and not knowing what I am talking about so I decide to just hug him again and never wanting to let go of him again. “It’s because of me forgetting, right?” he asks and his hands rub my back up and down. “I’m so sorry…”, he added and pulls back to kiss me all over. He presses his lips to mine, then to my cheeks, my nose, my temples and finally to my forehead.

                “Don’t ever cry because of me, okay?” I look up into his eyes and nod, trying to promise him that. “But you forgot me…”, I whisper quietly and look down. “…you asked for Junhyung.” My hands slide from his back to his sides and down to rest on his thighs. I know that this won’t be the last time and that someday he’ll forget me forever. I gaze up at him again and see the guilt in his eyes, thus I’m about to murmur an apology but he cuts me off by pressing his lips to mine in a heated kiss. He pushes me against the wall behind me, taking my hands into his, caressing my fingers with his thumb and pouring all the emotions into the kiss. Lips smash against each other and tongues try to find the other, sliding along the other in a hot and sloppy kiss. He moves into my lap and his hands rake into my hair. He hasn’t kissed me like this in a long time and we both pull back breathlessly just once to take a quick breath and then he kisses me again, not wanting to waste any second.

During the kiss I slowly get up, having his legs wrapped around my waist and I try to make my way into our bedroom. I lay him carefully down onto our bed and then he pushes me hesitantly off and sits up. “W-Wait…”, he says and turns around to all the photos. He takes one pile up and starts to rip one picture after the other. I raise a brow, startled. “What are you doing, Yoseob?”, I ask.

“If there are no pictures of him, then there is and was no Junhyung.” With a smile I lean forward and kiss my way along his neck and to his shoulders. “Finish that later…” He laughs at my request and not having the skill to be patient.

                “Whatever my yeobo wants.” He says and wraps his arms around me after pushing the photos off the bed and laying back into the mattress, pulling me on top of him and I lean down to kiss him.

well this was written very quickly today just because...i wanted an update and continue writing djsiafhieshjfie ;O; and I hope you like the update ;n; now idk anymore how to end the fic .______.;