When Eeteuk entered the dorm an hour later he was met with laughter and loud voices from the living room. He slipped out of his jacket and shoes and went to the kitchen to make himself a cup of coffee before joining the members in the living room. There were so many happy voices that he figured all of the members were gathered which was a rare occasion nowadays. He felt a wave of sadness as he thought of Youngwoon and how he would never be able to join their gatherings anymore but he pushed the thought aside. Just as the water began boiling he thought he heard a very special laugh from the room. One he hadn’t heard in what felt like forever and one he would give anything to hear again. But it couldn’t be. It was probably Kyuhyun or Shindong who had laughed and the noise from the boiler had distorted the sound so it sounded like Youngwoon since he just thought about him. He sighed deeply feeling the tears prickle, then he chuckled to himself; he had had more mood swings today than a 16-year old premenstrual pregnant girl. He added the coffee to the water and stirred it gently without making a lot of noise. He lifted it to his nose and inhaled the delicious smell of the coffee before exhaling deeply. He then turned to enter the living room, stopping in the doorway. He stood there, unnoticed by the members. He lifted his mug to take a sip of the warm coffee as he let his eyes wander over all of the gathered members. Kyuhyun sat in Siwon’s lap and he felt a small smile form on his lips. He then froze completely, the mug that was against his lips slipping from his hands and shattering against the floor causing the members to finally notice him. His heart had stopped beating and he could hear nothing but the raging rush of blood in his ears. He didn’t even blink as he stared at the man seated in the middle of the couch. His arm was in a sling, clearly broken and by his side was a crutch to help him walk on his sprained ankle. He looked extremely unhealthy; his skin a greyish colour and looked most of all like wax, large dark circles under the eyes and over the hollow cheeks. He was skinny and sporting several dark bruises on whatever part of his body that wasn’t covered with clothes or bandages but his eyes shone with happiness. He looked like Youngwoon, but he couldn’t be. Youngwoon was dead. Gone, forever out of Eeteuk’s grasp. But who was the stranger then?

“Teukie-angel?” the stranger asked and Eeteuk suddenly felt very faint. That voice… He tried to grip the doorway to support himself and to keep his legs from giving in but he was too busy staring at the stranger. How?...

When he opened his eyes minutes later he was lying on the floor, glass shards from the mug now embedded in his arm and the members gathered around him looking very worried. The stranger was still there and Eeteuk just stared up at him.

“You…. You were dead,” he choked, not being able to clear his throat and make his voice work properly. He was extremely overwhelmed and more than a little confused. Had it all just been a horrible nightmare? He sprang up before any of the members could say anything and he ran to his room, the members shouting at him to wait and listen. He ran to his drawer and opened it frantically with shaking hands. It was still empty save the letter he had gotten when they had told him that Youngwoon was dead. It had the same old dried tearstains on it and it hadn’t moved even a centimetre from where he had put it the last time he had read it. He grabbed it and ran back to the living room, bumping into the members who had tried to follow him to talk to him and calm him down. He held the letter up in front of the strange man who looked and sounded just like Youngwoon.

“This letter!” he screamed as he it in the stranger’s face. “I got this letter when Youngwoon died. I got this letter BECAUSE Youngwoon died!” he screamed as tears began showing in his eyes. The members looked extremely frightened; this was not at all the reaction any of them had expected from the leader. “Who… the hell… are you?!” Eeteuk bellowed in between his sobs that were now taking over his body, making him tremble terribly. This was some sick joke. It had to be. The stranger looked at him with hurt but calm eyes.

“You know very well who I am, Teukie-angel,” he said in a soft voice, reaching out to the distressed leader. Eeteuk recoiled immediately.

“Don’t touch me!” he screamed, sobbing harder than ever now. “You are not real! This is cruel! I spent so much time thinking about you! I thought of no one but you even when Siwon was ing me into the mattress!” A flicker of hurt was seen in the stranger’s eyes but it disappeared quickly. Siwon blushed a deep colour of red as some of the less informed members looked at him. “When I finally try to move on for real, when I finally feel like I might be able to actually do it, you have to come back!” he yelled, still sobbing and looking more and more like a complete madman.