Evening 6:50 pm

Dear Diary,

Hey :) My projects and other requirments are done. Exams are in Thursday, Friday and Saturday. I hope I do well. I'm listening to songs right now while scanning my books. I felt sort of some kind of weird feeling when...

So, I was walking home. The sun was still up and I'm hurrying because I really want to finish all the things I need to. 
I got home and dressed up in my comfy clothes. Went outside in the porch of my house and studied there.

It was pretty breezey and I love the cold air. I went through a lot lately. I felt like I'm going to give up on College. But I don't want to, I promised myself to do my best to have a good future.  

Suddenly, I hear clicks. And I another click after that. 

Mwoyo?

I looked around.

I saw a guy with a camera.

"Yah!! Nuguya? Why are you taking pictures of me?" - I said and stood up

"Oh. Mianhae" . And then it hit me. Like, like a big boulder. 

That voice, the tone, the... face.

"I hope you don't mind but I'm Cho Kyuhyun. A Student from Yonsei University." He bowed down

Huh? Why is he..--- He doesn't remember me?

"A-a---YAH! State your reason" Omo, oops- I forgot to introduce myself.

"Ah. Nae. Mianhae for not asking for permission. I was going to make a project and I was kind of needing a model for the cover of my project"

I looked at him with a confused face.

"But If you don't want to be my model, then I could just delete the photos"

I went down the porch "Aniyo. Gwenchana but next time, ask for permission"

"Sure. Mianhae again" He started to move away to the opposite direction.

"Jakkaman!" I clutched his hand and looked into his eyes when he faced me.
"You... You have nothing else to say?"

"Uh." He gave me a weird look. "No." He let go of my hand and walked away.

Huh? Does that mean that... You doesn't know me? I think he doesn't. If I'm wrong then he must be kidding or pretending.

But it's impossible, why would he pretend? Right?

I acted out like I don't know him as well. I don't want to complicate things since I see that he has a new life and I moved on. I don't want to mess his mind up. So I think it's for the best to forget about him like what he did to me. Although that would be mean because I'm doing it purposely. Besides, his mom doesn't like me anyway. Yet, I still have feelings. Why can't he get out of my system!?

Today, seeing Kyuhyun again made me realize that feelings and emotions change. It doesn't mean that if ou don't feel something for each other anymore, the love is gone.

If love were only feelings then there is no such thing as lasting. Love can sometimes turn numb or even forced to be forgotten but you just have to be patient because love itself is life.

Not all times you are in for the happiness, you have to give in to it's bitterness. But no metter what, as long as you choose and decide to continue it will be more beautiful.

I'll wait for you, Cho Kyuhyun. I just have to wait.

xoxo,

SeoHyun