Minjeong winces when she accidentally pricks her finger with the needle in her hand. She’s been so out of focus lately that she was starting to piss herself off.
Soojin boasted about being recruited by Dr. Jeon to be his new intern on his research, and it spurred a type of jealousy in Minjeong that she didn’t want to feel. She was always hard on herself, but Minjeong always did more than well for herself.
Now she felt stuck. Lost.
People kept telling her that she was just a surgical intern. That she should branch out and see if other specialties called out to her, but Minjeong felt like she was ten steps behind everyone.
“Minjeong, you won’t believe it.” Mark barges into the skills lab, Shuhua behind him with a tray of food.
“What?” Minjeong’s shoulders were depleted.
“Dr. Kang let me assist in an internal fixation procedure.” Mark seats himself on the seat across from Minjeong, a grin on his face. “She’s so cool, Minjeong. A total badass.”
Minjeong lets out a weak chuckle, “I’m happy for you, Mark.”
“Soojin got to assist Dr. Jeon in one of his surgeries. She’s in there right now.” Shuhua says, biting into an apple slice.
Minjeong’s heart drops to the floor. That should’ve been her. It would’ve if it wasn’t for Yu Jimin.
“T-That’s… I’m happy for her too.” Minjeong clears , trying her best to not look too torn down that it wasn’t her in that operating room.
“Did you get to assist Dr. Yu with any surgeries today?”
She gives Mark a blank stare, before looking back down at the stitches she had been working on. “No. I was in the pit the whole day.”
Minjeong snorts, shaking her head at Mark’s lack of sympathy. Well, she did tell him that she enjoyed the pit. Obviously she lied to try and avoid her ex at all costs.
“Nothing I hoped for myself is working out for me.” Minjeong says, a sad chuckle coming out of her. “Sometimes I feel like I don’t even belong here.”
“That’s nonsense.” Shuhua shuts down her insecurities right away. “You deserve it just as much as the next doctor. We work hard to be here, Minjeong. That’s why we’re here.”
“Your time will come, Minjeong. For now, just take what’s being handed to you.” Shuhua tells her, “there’s many things you can learn in every experience. Might not be one that you’re looking for, but you’ll learn something new every time.”
Minjeong sighs, “yeah.”
Minjeong winces when Jimin cleans up her scratched cheek, pulling back slightly. Clicking her tongue, Jimin gives her a stern look, and Minjeong settles into a pout.
The older woman continues tending to her cuts and bruises, a frown never leaving her lips. Obviously Jimin was upset, not at Minjeong, but just at how her girlfriend got herself into the situation that caused her to be all bruised up.
“Don’t apologize. You did nothing wrong.” Jimin tells her, and despite how upset she looked, her voice still spoke to Minjeong like soft flowers on a spring day.
“Then why are you so upset?”
Jimin furrows her brows, “why wouldn’t I be upset, baby? You’re hurt.” Her voice was a little more stern this time and it made Minjeong’s eyes well up with tears.
Shaking her head, Jimin throws away the wrapper for the band-aid, and then carefully applies it onto Minjeong’s cheek. “I don’t want you to get into fights because of me. I don’t care if people talk about me like that. I’d rather have you not bruised and beaten and putting yourself at risk for expulsion because you got into a fight.”
Minjeong wipes her eyes, “you would have done the same if people were badmouthing me.”
Jimin pauses, before walking away to put the first aid kit back into her drawer. “That’s different.”
“How’s that any different?”
Turning around, Jimin leans against her desk, heaving a sigh. Jimin stares at Minjeong, and her heart hurts to see her like that. “It’d be me with the cuts and bruises. Not you.”
“That’s not any better, Jimin.”
Silence envelops them, a mix of emotions flowing through their gazes. The distance between them was painful for Minjeong.
“You’re the only one I have left, Minjeong.” Jimin’s voice cracks slightly with the overwhelming emotions she had been feeling. “You’re everything to me.”
Minjeong frowns, “Jimin.”
“You need to take care of yourself.” Jimin looked sad, which wasn’t something that happened quite often, even if that’s what she would be feeling. “You can’t be bruised up. You can’t get into fights. You need to take care of yourself and that frail heart of yours.”
Standing up, Minjeong stops in front of Jimin, who was trying her hardest not to cry. She cups the older woman’s cheek, pulling her in closer.
“I’m not going anywhere.” Minjeong assures Jimin. She grabs Jimin’s arms to wrap around her waist, wrapping her own around the older woman’s neck.
Connecting their foreheads together, Minjeong kisses Jimin to prove it. Their eyes close shut, and Minjeong can taste the salt from Jimin’s tears.
“Do you feel me, baby? I’m right here.”
Minjeong kisses Jimin's forehead, before hugging her tightly. “Please don’t cry, my love, I’m sorry.”
Jimin tightens her arms around Minjeong’s petite body, face nuzzling closer into her neck. “I’m scared every day, Minjeong.”
The raw emotions that Jimin was showing hit Minjeong like a truck. It’s not that Jimin had problems being vulnerable with Minjeong, it’s just that she’s always been an advocate for thinking positively all the time, saying thinking negatively was a waste of time.
“I love you, I love you, I love you.” Jimin whispered brokenly like a never ending poem.
Tightening her hold, Minjeong let out a sob. Her heart hurt for Jimin. She must’ve suffered so much with these thoughts kept in her mind all alone. Minjeong couldn’t even provide assurance or comfort because Jimin chose to keep it to herself.
“My heart beats for you.” Minjeong whispers into her ear, swallowing the thick lump in . “As long as you’re with me, my heart will keep beating for you.”
“Here. A present.” Mark hands Minjeong a case of cut up mangoes. “It’s your favorite right?”
Eyeing it, Minjeong raises a brow. “Yes? How’d you know that?”
Blinking, Mark opens his mouth, but his answer is delayed as he scrambles for one. He didn’t think it’d be wise to tell Minjeong that a certain cardiothoracic surgeon had ordered him to come all the way to the skill lab to deliver the mangoes.
“I-It’s.. u-um… Wikipedia page. It’s in your.. it’s online.”
Taking it from Mark, Minjeong shrugs and a smile soon widens on her face. “Thanks, Mark. I forgot to eat breakfast this morning.”
Letting out a breath of relief, Mark mirrors Minjeong’s smile. “Of course you did.” He said, rolling his eyes. “Don’t you forget every morning?”
Minjeong doesn’t reply, only sticking the plastic fork into a piece of mango, and eating it sheepishly.
“What else does my Wikipedia page say?” She asks with a mouth full of mango. “Why do I even have a Wikipedia page? Who am I, if not a failing surgical intern? Why do people care?” It was supposed to be sarcasm, and light, but Mark could only roll his eyes because he knew that a part of Minjeong actually believed it. This woman was just too hard on herself.
“Your parents are pretty iconic.”
“Yeah, my parents are. Not me, so who even bothered to make one of me?”
Mark blinks, “I’m not the internet people, Minjeong. Could not give you an answer.”
Perking up, Mark slightly slams his palm on the table. “Oh! It does say you went to this prestigious high school for the rich and the smart. I happen to know another alumni from the same school.” He gives Minjeong a knowing look, a teasing smirk on his lips, “Dr. Yu.”
“So high school sweethearts?” Mark rubs his chin in thought. “I bet if I search up your names with the school, something—,”
“Mark!” Minjeong clicks her tongue, “stop being ridiculous.” She scolds, “and nosy.”
Pouting, Mark slides his head down from his palm, and onto the table. “Damn, is what happened with the two of you that bad?”
Minjeong just gives him a look, biting into another mango piece. The silence tells Mark that she wasn’t going to admit to anything, and he only releases another sigh.
After a moment, Mark eyes her again. “You know, she asks about you everyday. It’s kind of annoying.”
“Just ignore it.”
“It’s kind of hard to ignore it when she’s your boss, Minjeong.” Mark says with an overdramatic groan. “I would be in the middle of r