My father returned earlier from work than most days before that night.

As he locked the door, I ran up to him. "Appa, you're home." This occasion was quite rare to come by, so I'd learned to cherish it. Maybe I could finally have  some family bonding time with him today.

"Have you finished your homework, Chaewon?" my father asked, taking off his black suit jacket and his tie. I nodded eagerly. "Why are you home early today?"

He hung his suit jacket onto the clothes hanger at the door and stepped inside the house barefoot, sweeping right past me like I didn't exist. I felt hurt, like why would my own father be so cold and ignorant to his own daughter?

I followed him upstairs. "Chaewon," my father warned in a dangerous voice. "Stop following me like a monkey. I have important matters to discuss with your mother, and I am sure you wouldn't want to get into the way, would you?"

This jeering tone again. My father consistently used it to keep me out of things that he didn't want me to do when I was little, and it worked. But that was only when I was a kid. Right now, I was all grown up and mature. I'd grown used to it, being in the family for so long, but I realized as the days past, my father had been more distant than ever today. Why was he like that? I was dying to know, and about the matter he'd referred to, what was that?

"Appa, I want to know. Juseyo? (Please?)" I felt like a seven-year-old begging for a new toy or sweets, but I didn't regret it. I was old enough to be involved in my family's affairs, not that little kid everyone thought I was. Heck, I was already seventeen and in high school!

My father wasn't impressed. He turned around once again, glaring at me through his thick spectacles. "Chaewon, I'll give you one last chance. Leave me and your mother alone. I want to talk to her privately."

I didn't move an inch. My stubbornness would certainly get me into trouble one day, and perhaps, it was today. "Appa, I'm big enough-"

"Chaewon! Enough is enough. This is our own private matter. Kids shouldn't be involved in it at all. Now get going."

I could tell he was on the verge of exploding, and that wouldn't be pretty.

"Byeongcheol!" my mother rushed out of her room. "Oh my gods, what are you doing to Chaewon? Why are you shouting?"

My father's stern look melted away, replacing it with a kind smile instead, but I wasn't fooled by his pretence. It was obvious he was just trying to makeup to my mother and win her favor. "Oh, Inhye, dear, it's nothing. I'll be right there, after I talk to Chaewon." He cast me a sideways glare.

I took the cue and figured arguing was pointless. My father was skilled in winning arguments, and talking back to an adult would be suicide. There was no telling what kind of punishments he would give me.

"Alright, I'm leaving." I walked down the stairs in a huff, scowling. I wasn't done with them, though. After their serious conversation, I was going to pursue after them and get the word out of tight mouths.

I might be a bit too much to handle, but that was me. The more you tried to keep things from me, the more I'd be curious. It was time my father should learn that. He didn't seem to know me at all, despite living with me beneath the same roof for seventeen years. He was so caught up with his business, he even threw away his whole life for it. Was work the most important thing? I wanted to ask him one day. Was it more important than everything else, that you had to ditch your wife and your daughter and leave them in the dark?

***

At nine, I tiptoed over to my mother's room to check on them. The door was locked, I figured after turning the doorknob for so many times and still couldn't open it.

I wondered what they were talking about and what they were doing inside. What was it that was so secretive for you to keep it away from your daughter?

Pressing my ears to the door, I tried to listen for sounds of talking inside, but all I heard was the humming of wood. Maybe they were sleeping together or something? I decided not to wake them.

I should probably sleep too if I wanted to wake up on time for morning self study tomorrow. After washing up, I tucked myself under the covers and closed my eyes.

The next morning, everything was normal at home. My father was still sleeping in his room, but my mother was already up to make me breakfast.

"Today is fish porridge. I woke up a bit late today, so I couldn't make anything better than that," she apologized as she set the bowl of hot porridge in front of me.

I was a bit annoyed at my mother for not standing up for me. Over the years of my father's business, she was more on my father's side than mine, more compliant to him than anytime before. Sometimes, I wondered why it was the case, when she might already have known that my father was being too authoritative. Why couldn't she defend her own pride?

I shoved all these thoughts to the back of my mind. They weren't that important now. My studies were more important, and also dealing with Jungkook...

Kyung Ah was waiting for me outside my house