Mens Rea: Latin for a “guilty mind” or criminal intent in committing the act. The term used to describe the mental element required to constitute a crime. Generally, it requires that the accused meant or intended to do wrong or at least knew he was doing wrong. However, the precise mental element varies from crime to crime.

“Rina, are you out of your mind? It’s the weekends. Bakit mo naman pinapagawa ng project ‘tong groupmates mo? Diba sabi ni Prof, we should all do it sa campus?”

We are here at a café near the univ. I decided to message my groupmates that we should do the project today para all we would do sa campus is mag finalize na lang. Nalaman siguro ni Gi because one of my members is a friend of hers.

How do I know? Because siya ang source of chismis ni Aeri Giselle!

Gi barged in the café na parang walang ibang tao rito. Two hands, opening both sides of the doors and after that, she decided to bombard me with questions in this very tranquil café. Ewan ko ba. Wala naman akong ginagawang masama.

“I am not out of my mind Gi. Gaya nga ng sabi mo, it’s the weekends so, more time for us to finish this. At least we will not cram.” Do I even need to make myself clear? Free kaming lahat ng mga kasama ko so mas better na gamitin ang time na ‘to para tapusin ang kailangang tapusin.

Isn't this one of the roles of a leader? To make sure na walang mahihirapan because everything is already settled before ang deadline?

“Are you hearing yourself right now? Bakit ba nagkakaganiyan ka nanaman?” It’s visible that she’s holding back her outdoor voice – suppressing the frustrations.

Walang imik ang groupmates ko. They just watched us na parang nanonood lang sila ng K-drama na ang genre ay action na may konting drama.

“Gi.” I sighed, breathing out the bottling irritation sa kaloob-looban ko. “If you won’t say anything that make sense please go ahead first. Message na lang kita kapag tapos na kami then let’s talk over lunch.”

“No, you are done here.” Hinila niya ako using her left hand and gave purpose to her right by fixing my things.

I snapped and swatted her hand away. “Ano ba? Can’t you see may ginagawa kami? Have some respect naman Aeri.” I can’t take it anymore. This is foolish.

“Rina, I am trying my best to control my freaking mouth ngayon. Ayokong mapagsalitaan ka in front of people.” She is clenching her fist tightly.

“What do you want ba? Do you wanna talk? Fine. Sa labas tayo pero after we talk, babalik ako rito.” I crossed my arms sa chest ko.

She didn’t say anything and went outside so I followed.

“Go, sabihin mo na.” Truth be told, natatakot ako if Gi turns into her brutally honest self. Her words cut deep and shoot through.

She went straight to the point. “Is it about the oral recitation, Karina?” Her eyes are not questioning rather, it is aking for confirmations.

She knows… Of course, she unequivocally knows. Alam niyang I could not take it to heart that I am already at the brink of slipping away sa 1st place because of a certain someone.

Maybe, you’re even wondering, why am I so negative eh isang oral recitation pa lang naman ‘yon? Well, isa pa nga lang and I won’t lie that she did great kaya what more kapag dadami na?

“How does that connect with what I’m doing?” I didn’t hide the bitterness in my tone. “I just want to finish this early. Believe me, para rin naman sa kanila ‘to. Our early submission will result to good grades.”

“No. You are not doing this ‘para sa kanila’ and patently not for their grades. You’re doing this for your grades and sa pride mong hindi matanggap-tangap na natalo ka ng isang baguhan lang sa univ.”

Physically, I flinched but hindi ako nagulat mentally kasi this is how Gi confronts me if ever my soul leaves my body.

She already informed me that if ever na magbitaw siya ng mga ganitong salita, it is her way to make me rethink my decisions as of the moment; hindi raw kasi ako madaan sa madaling usapan whenever my pride does not want to lose this game. So, as much as her words become sharp as a knife, it doesn’t affect me dahil paraan lang to ni Gi to bring rational Rina back to life. Emz not emz!

After minutes of silence, Giselle’s body became less tense and her eyes softened. NO. I don’t wanna do soft hours!

“I’m sorry, Rins.” Kinuha niya ang kamay ko and held it tightly as if assuring me that everything is still well. She also caressed it with her thumb.

I did not say anything and looked away. Nagmamatigas po, opo.

“Rina, somehow, you have to accept the fact that we all face defeats. Its purpose is to build us – not to destroy us. How you cope and deal with it, will always be up to you… Just because you answered a question mistakenly doesn’t mean that you have to beat yourself up and worse, damayin ang groupmates mo.”

I bowed my head, avoiding to open my mouth kasi alam kong ngangawa lang ako sa harap niya.

Kahit ayaw ko mang aminin, I have this tendency talaga na minsan, nadadamay ko ang mga tao sa paligid ko if ever I come up against failures or mistakes. Thank God, Gi is always here to remind me.

The vibe became lighter and soothing so, I hugged her tightly; my resolve crumbled already. Hindi ko nga napansin that I'm crying na.

It was this heavy na pala. I hate it when I invalidate my feelings.

“Ano ba ‘yan? The Rina that I know, wouldn’t cry over something like this ‘no. Especially na may rival na siya ngayon. I think she would even kick it up a notch para lang ipamukha na she’s still the best eh.” Gi said while rubbing my back. Tulo uhog na siguro ako kasi ang bigat talaga but I think Gi will not judge me for that.

I suddenly felt sleepy in my bestfriend’s embrace. Grabe, I did not sleep ba? Kahapon kasi after classes I locked myself sa room ko and let my body feel numb. I did not cry. I did not feel anything. Siguro sumapi na yung isang personality ko – si stubborn Rina. Chos!

“Why don’t you go back to your groupmates and tell them that your on-the-spot groupwork is done na?” I nodded while she ruffled my hair with a warm smile.

I followed what Gi said and entered the now silent café. Nag-sorry ako sa mga kasama ko and said na I’ll do better next time and not let my emotions take over me. They understood naman. I even offered to treat them to lunch pero they refused kasi nga kulang pa raw yung tulog nila, uuwi na lang daw muna sila.

Great, I feel bad…

“As what I’ve said kanina, it’s the weekends… and guess what?!” Ginawa akong manghuhula?

“Uhhh, iuuwi mo ako sa bahay and let me rest?”

“No, silly! I invited the girls na mag lunch and shopping! Consider it as our girls’ day out para naman maka labas ka riyan sa self-built prison mo.” What does she mean by that?!

No jokes though, I’m glad I have my bestfriend beside me. She knows me more than I know myself.

Hindi ko nga siguro marerealize that I’m sometimes overbearing if it were not for her. I feel bad tuloy about other people na they don’t have Gi as their bestfriend. Kahit naman na she is seen gossiping and having fun with others, ako pa rin ang bff niya no. Hmpf!  

Anyway, we are now walking kasi malapit lang din naman ang mall dito. Naaaninagan ko na nga yung friends namin sa restaurant who seem bored and gutom na. I can see na appetizer pa lang yung kinain nila.

“Finally! What took you both so long?” Lia stated after she saw us walking towards them.

“Well, Rina here decided to be a hard-working devotee of Pol Sci today and ayaw magpatinag dun sa café” Gi even side-eyed me with an exhausted smile. Grabe pagod na pagod kakasermon?

“Lunch is on me girls. Take it as my apology, stop complaining na.” Bye allowance.

“Oh, the world is healing!” Ang OA lang?!

Subsequent to our sumptuous meal, we ordered drinks and decided na magtagal pa muna rito sa resto. All we did while finishing it were catching up and talk about our ganaps lately. Hindi rin nakatakas sa akin si Yeji nung naalala ko yung pagmumukha ni Ryu kahapon.

After I sipped an ample amount from my drink, I placed it farther sa akin para I could settle my elbows sa table and propped my chin on top of my entwined fingers. “Yej, how are things with your childhood bestie?” Sabi ko na may mapanlokong ngiti.

HAHA! Teluk Rina is back oh! I’m already done channeling my inner Wednesday Addams. Chos!

Eto talaga yung mga moments na mapapasabi ka talaga ng ‘I’m sorry, the stubborn Rina can’t come to the phone right now. Why? Oh, Cause she’s dead!’ EMZ. Nandito pa rin naman ako...

Hindi p’wedeng mawala ang second personality ko! 

Yeji looked at me with a confused expression on her face. “What things?”

“You know, things that consists of you and your childhood best-pal being torpe when it’s clearly obvious that you both like each other.” Ilang beses na namin pinagsabihan si Yej tungkol dito. It’s like they’re playing a